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  • The question of what to buy a man that has everything is a true dilemma for the girlies. Because we are so helpful, we’ve put together a list of things you can get them. 

    1. Table mat

    Nigerian men are always asking what women bring to the table. You can buy a set of table mats to set the table for the other things you will bring to the table. 

    2. BYC singlet

    Forget what they say, they actually love the singlets. After complaining, they will wear it all the time until it has holes and you have to buy them another one. 

    3. Wristwatch straps

    You probably cannot afford to buy the wristwatch so just buy the straps and he will know you have tried. 

    4. 3-in-1 shampoo, conditioner and moisturizer

    Men who have everything got there by working hard. Sometimes they don’t have time to shower and do a skincare routine afterwards. This is where a 3-in-1 skincare product comes in. Save their time. 

    5. Ring box

    He’s going to propose anyway so you can just help him out by buying him a ring box for him to put your ring in when he’s ready. 

    Diamond ring in a blue box – 3d render

    6. Magnetic earrings

    Especially if he works in tech and has recently developed an interest in jewellery. Magnetic earrings will help him decide if he wants to pierce his ear or not. 

    7. Black nail polish

    Yes, he has everything but does he have black nail polish? If he does, buy him one that has glitters in it. Help him push the standards of masculinity. 

    8. A sex toy

    You can buy him a fleshlight toy for when you’re not there so he can think of you while he masturbates. You can also add magun so when he is thinking of someone else while he is using it, the thing will hook on his penis. Thank me later. 

    9. Flowers

    Pretty sure nobody has ever sent him flowers. You can send flowers to his home office along with lunch so he knows you appreciate that he works his ass off to sponsor your baby girl lifestyle. 

    10. Gold necklace with your name on it

    After all your investments, it’s only right you claim him by marking your territory. It doesn’t have to be your full name. It can just be your initials. 

    If you buy any of these gifts and he doesn’t propose within the next three months, dump his ass and invest in another man who has it all. 

  • If they’re young, and Nigerian, these eleven gifts will definitely make their Christmas.

    And if your budget is tighter than skinny jeans, you can always opt for number three.

    1. Money

    Just open your wallet and slap them with 2 million in a foreign currency.

    Christmas, Sponsored post,

    2. Plot of land

    Life’s too short for them not to be a landlord too. If a land on Banana Island will tear your pocket, they can manage Lekki.

    3. Luxury hampers

    Hampers take the hard work out of gifting. Be sure to add these items; alcoholic and alcohol-free wines, curated gift boxes, jams, 2022 starter pack, small chops, bathroom slippers to trek inside traffic, olive oil for glowing skin, shades to hide from enemies, and other unique items which you can find only at Celebrations.

    4. House rent

    Boya if you cannot buy land, you can pay two years rent upfront. T for thank you very much.

    5. The grace of God

    It looks like that is the only thing that does not have comma in Nigeria.

    6. Confectioneries/sweets

    Nobody has to wait till birthdays to indulge in some sweet toothed chop-chop. Gift a Nigerian young adult chocolates or biscuits today. G for God bless.

    7. Christmas scents/fragrances

    You can’t go wrong with diffusers, scented candles for your homes and perfumes. Why? Nobody wants to enter 2022 smelling like all the stress of 2021 combined

    8. Your destiny helper’s number

    Oh, you think it’s only you your destiny helper was created for? Everybody must collect their share of “help”, and that’s that about that.

    9. Teddy bear

    Nothing slaps more than a soft, comforting teddy to hold onto after carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders. Since human teddies are now hard to find.

    10. Somebody’s son/daughter

    Why wait till “one day” for somebody’s son or daughter to love you, when they can be gifted to you now?

    11. Space in your relationship

    If you cannot find someone’s son or daughter to gift a young, Nigerian adult, the next option is to create space in your relationship. In this case, three isn’t a crowd.

    Unleash the Christmas spirit with gifts!

    Celebrations is a one-stop solution provider of carefully selected gift items, curated hampers, cards, and premium lifestyle needs, such as fragrance, home fragrances( scented candles, diffusers), home ware, party ware, confectionery, toys and so much more.

    Is wrapping gifts not one of your strong suits?

    They’ve got you covered with expert gift wrapping services. Visit Celebrations stores in Lagos, Jos or Abuja to source for beautiful gifts your loved ones absolutely treasure! Or shop online here.

  • Christmas is upon us and you know how gifts make the season sweeter. Here’s a list of gifts you can buy your Nigerian babe. 

    girl with christmas gifts

    1. Scented candles

    Scented candles are always a delight to receive and there are so many scents to choose from. Just make sure it’s not something they are allergic to and you’re good. 

    2. A dress

    Although the girlies are now denouncing ashawo dresses, these are a ton of other dresses you can buy. From short dresses to dinner gowns for date nights, the choice is yours. She just has to be into dresses. A good tip is to buy a colour that makes her skin pop. 

    3. Shoes 

    Shoes are a safe bet. Some babes prefer sneakers to heels, you might want to be sure what her preference is before making any purchases. 

    4. Coloured eyeliner 

    Coloured liners are definitely in vogue right now. The thing with those liners is that you don’t have to have a full face beat to wear it.

    5. Bone straight 

    Yes, Bone straight weaves are still in style and the girlies still want them. Take it up a notch and pay for the weave to be made into a wig. Thank us later. 

    6. Spa day 

    Spa days include body massages, facials, manicures, pedicures and other body treatments. Honestly, everyone living in Nigeria right now deserves a spa day, don’t deny your babe of one. 

    7. Eden life plan 

    Eden is all about soft life. They will take care of her laundry, her meals and her cleaning for as long as you are willing to pay for. You have to be careful sha, she might fall in love with her gardener. 

    8. iPhone 13 

    So they can take bomb pictures for you and you alone. Everyone wins. 

    9. Apple watch 

    If she already had the iPhone 13, this would make such a good gift for her. 

    10. Money

    If all else fails, you can always just send money to her PiggyVest account and make her richer. We rise by lifting others. 

    Subscribe to our HER newsletter for more stories about African women and how they navigate life.

  • Yesterday, beloved BBN star, Erica Nlewedim turned 27.

    Take this quiz and we’ll tell you which of her gifts you are.

  • Valentine is coming again and, as usual, Nigerian women a particular set of people are getting ready to furnish their men with the usual gifts we see every year. I’ve decided to save you the trouble and make a list of things Nigerian men don’t want to receive this year. If you really want to be a useful member of your relationship, you can find a list of things to buy your man for valentine’s here.

    1. Sex

    For the 5482nd time, sex is NOT a gift. Nobody ever thinks “You know what I’d really want for Valentine’s Day? Sex.” Nobody. Ever. Is it not the same sex that you’re having every other day?

    2. Singlet and boxers

    Did he tell you he doesn’t have underwear? Did he tell you he is suffering?

    3. Handkerchief

    Unless your man is a professional traditional dancer, I don’t see why you should be buying him handkerchief.

    pancocojams: Nigerian Culture: Igbo Women Dancing With White Handkerchiefs

    4. Pen

    We know they said that the pen is mightier than the sword but it doesn’t mean it makes a great gift. Put in more effort abeg.

    5. BYC T-shirt/Chase Deer

    Resist the urge to be unfortunate, please.

    6. “3000 Reasons Why I Love You”

    Okay but na love we go chop? Who are you giving homework to go and be reading?

    7. Face on Pillow/Mug

    If he wants to know what he looks like, he has mirror at home.

    [donation]

  • Gifting is a very important way of being reminded that your partner still cares about you, even when they are cheating.  You can catch your cheating partner by the quality of gifts you receive this Valentine’s Day.

    If you are gifted anything on this list, hold their collar till they confess.

    1. A date at a fancy restaurant

    How do they know this fancy restaurant you’ve never been to before? It’s because they have already tried it out with one of their hoes. If you look well, you’ll see that the waiter even recognises them.

    Order the most expensive thing on the menu for revenge. 

    2. Scented candles

    If they buy you scented candles, it is because they don’t want you to smell their other partners’ scent on them when they come home from a long day of shameless cheating.

    Don’t light the candles until you have smelt them.

    3. A flight ticket to an exotic resort

    They have finished cheating at home, now they want to go international. While you are getting a massage, they will have enough time to sneak around and find new people to cheat on you with.

    Do not let them out of your sight.

    4. New clothes

    If they do this, they are projecting the style of their favourite lover onto you. They are using style to tell you that the way you dress isn’t up to par, and that’s why they are cheating in the first place.

    You can use the clothes to fish out who in their life dresses like that.

    5. A life-size teddy bear

    Not only are they cheating, but they do not plan to stop. They know they will be out cheating day and night, so they have decided to give you a companion for all times they won’t be around.

    Reject that gift immediately. 

    6. Great sex

    In this case, they have cheated so much that they have now become experts at making others cum nine times in one day. They now want to give you leftover pleasure.

    Don’t not be distracted by detty orgasms.

  • Here’s a common Twitter scenario: A woman posts a tweet saying “This man’s birthday is coming and I don’t know what to get him.” Some clowns will quote the tweet, saying she should give him 1,500 and boxers. 

    Since women are always so confused about things Nigerian men actually want, we the nice people at Zikoko made a handy list of things Nigerian men really want.

    1. Actual gifts

    Let’s start from here. Singlet and boxers are NOT gifts, no matter how you package it. Examples of actual gifts men actually want are a brand new set of car tyres, a Macbook Pro, whatever iPhone is the latest, or a Fossil watch. Handkerchief and singlet will not cut it anymore.

    2. Peace of Mind

    If actual gifts are too much for you to buy (of course), Nigerian men can really settle for peace of mind. Allow them to rest. It’s not every time you’ll be pressing our necks. Let us breathe.

    3. Allow him to date other people

    I mean, of course, Nigerian women will never dream of giving anybody piece of mind, so how about you let him date other women once in a while? Just a little cheating? No? Okay.

    4. Order him a week’s worth of lunch

    This one is one of the best things you can do for the man you love so much.

    5. Sponsor a weekend getaway

    If none of the above appeals to you, you can consider sponsoring weekend holiday, within and outside Nigeria. As long as I don’t see another tweet saying “I don’t know what to get for this man.”

    You probably want to read this: What Does A Round Of Sex Mean To You? We Asked 6 Nigerians

    Man Like. Coming soon to Z!

  • If you date Nigerian women, you know that one way they show their love and appreciation for you is by giving you singlet and boxers for your birthday. What a thoughtful gift, isn’t it?

    It is your turn to return the favour and show how much you love and appreciate your Nigerian woman. We compiled a list of things women absolutely want to be bought. (Source: Bureau of Imaginary Statistics)

    1. Jar with 365 reasons why you love her.

    Love You Always Jar of Romantic Notes | KindNotes Unique Gifts

    Women don’t really want much. They just want to hear how much you love them. Why not write 365 reasons why you love her and put it in a jar. If you’re feeling nice, you can write it on coloured paper.

    2. Flowers

    Nigerian women love flowers. Just get her a bunch of flowers. No need to buy anything else.

    Can A Guy Still Catch A Girl By Writing Her Love Poems? - Romance ...

    3. Lipgloss

    I can assure you she doesn’t want too much. Just a lip gloss would do. If you’re feeling nice, make it two to show her how much you love her.

    Victoria Secret 5pcs Lip Gloss price from konga in Nigeria - Yaoota!

    4. Three months supply of sanitary pad

    Groceries :: TOILETRIES :: Always Ultra Sanitary Pad - 8 Pads (pink)

    We all know how tough periods can be. Why not eliminate some of her worries by buying her sanitary towels for her birthday? Best. Partner. Ever.

    5. Body Fantasies

    Body Fantasies Vanilla Fantasy Body Spray For Women 236ml ...

    This is for when you’re feeling ultra generous and you want to spoil her. She’s been a great girlfriend all year; it is time to reward her with this.

    6. Peace of mind

    Women love how to brag about how they don’t need to give their men anything because they give him peace of mind. How about you give them a taste? Gift them this peace of mind and call it a day. Till next year.

    Read this one: 5 Things To Do When You Get A Salary Increase.

  • In a land of dust, and time of ashy skin, the fate of your social clout rests on the type of presents you get your friends…the name: thoughtfulness. Here are five thoughtful gifts to make your friends go: “who send you message?”

    Cold Medicine

    With all the dust in the air, everyone is either sneezing or coughing. For friends experiencing allergies, you can offer to refill their prescriptions. In addition, you could also get Vitamin C tablets as they are very helpful during this period. They help to boost immunity and prevent breakdowns that are common during this season.

    Lotion

    If you are a good friend like me, you certainly do not want your friend setting off any bushfire from all that ashy skin. You can go the whole mile; from lip balm, to hand lotion, to body lotion. The goal is to let my people moisturize!

    The difference your gift makes.

    Water Bottle

    I do not say this lightly, this the period to drink loads of water…and also mind your business. A whole lot. All that dry weather results in dehydration and you obviously do not want your friends to gas out on you. If you want them to be alive to witness you get married, give birth to little unemployed rascals, then buy them water bottles so they can drink water to their heart content and live long.

    Not this size but you get the idea.

    Canada-style Clothing

    Seriously, what is the difference between Harmattan and Winter? See this as preparing your friends for greatness. This is the chance to gift them something multi-purpose – useful in their interim country (here) and also in their real country(abroad). Thick clothes are vital for surviving the intense cold during this season.

    Money

    Let us be serious for a minute, money can keep you warm, moisturize you, hydrate you, and even revitalize you. This is the gift to end all gifts. The best part? They won’t see it coming because they have been blindsided by all the Detty December they had to do. No need to thank us, we are here to serve you.

    Did we miss any gift? let us know in the comment section.

  • Yes, it’s almost Christmas again. That glorious time of year where you wonder what exactly is going on with Nigeria’s weather (where is harmattan?!) while dreading the awful reunion with family members you’d actually rather swallow a handful of broken glass than spend time with.

    You’ll also have to keep up the charade you all do every year of giving each other gifts you know damn well neither of you couldn’t care less about. Like picture frames or custom mugs that say weirdly personalized and – at the same time – general greetings like, “World’s Best Relative“.

    Well, fear not. Because this year, I’m here to help you have fun with this year’s gift giving process.

    1) Bed Sheet and pillowcase set:

    They’ll be shocked as hell that you splurged on something this nice and will feel super terrible while handing you the 6th mug in 6 years. What they won’t know is that you lined the bedsheets and pillowcases with bed bugs the night before. The ultimate Trojan horse.

    2) Throw pillows:

    Also, stuffed with bed bugs.

    3) Cheap perfume:

    Preferably, something social media-themed that costs N400 and you (and they) know that it smells like hot, steamy garbage in a can.

    4) A self-help book. Preferably, this one:

    Then slip in a hand-written note that says, “I figured you’d want to know why you act like such an inflamed asshole all the time.”

    5) “Accidentally” send them something you know that they’re allergic to. Like a cat OR:

    6) Anti-wrinkle cream.

    Hand it to them along with a picture of them that you’ve labelled to let them know which of their body part needs it the most. Let it be a picture of them that you’ve written the word EVERYWHERE across.

    7) A spice collection where you’ve switched out the thyme for weed.

    And switched out the salt for cocaine.

    8) The 6th book in an interesting, ongoing, but obscure book series.

    So that when they almost lose their minds getting into the story (by guessing at five books worth of plot elements), they’ll also have a difficult time finding the rest of the books.