It’s great that executive offices in Nigeria have constitutional term limits because we know our politicians would rather die there if we allowed them.
On May 29, 2023, 17 Nigerian states will get brand new governors because their current ones can’t continue after serving two terms.
What will anyone remember about them?
Okezie Ikpeazu — Abia State
“Don’t rush me. I’ll leave with style.”
Udom Gabriel Emmanuel — Akwa Ibom State
The tailor who delivered his suits definitely ate for eight years straight.
Samuel Ortom — Benue State
He’ll finally have something else to do besides picking fights with Buhari every three market days.
Ben Ayade — Cross River State
We’ll miss his public tears and weird budget titles.
Ifeanyi Okowa — Delta State
This man could end up in Aso Rock Villa next May, so we prefer not to speak.
Dave Umahi — Ebonyi State
After missing out on the presidential ticket this year, Umahi is one of at least eight current governors trying to become senators next year. The workers he failed to pay for over six months should have something to say about that.
Ifeanyi Ugwuanyi — Enugu State
We don’t know what he did in eight years, but it’s provocative enough that he plans to continue in the Senate if he wins the election next year.
Mohammed Badaru Abubakar — Jigawa State
He’s known as “Baba Mai Calculator” for some reason and has won a ton of awards for being a decent governor, but if he was walking down the street, would you recognise this man?
Nasir El-Rufai — Kaduna State
His retirement plan is unclear, but we hope he has one that keeps him far away from posting his wild takes on Twitter.
Umar Ganduje — Kano State
Remember how your school teachers said actions have consequences, but this man won a second term despite a clear-cut bribery scandal? Your teachers lied.
Aminu Bello Masari — Katsina State
He’s the governor of Buhari’s home state and loves negotiating with bandits even when they keep fooling him. We hope he doesn’t plan to be in any advisory role in the future.
Abubakar Atiku Bagudu — Kebbi State
Abubakar Sani Bello — Niger State
Bello doesn’t understand the concept of a break. He’s one of our group of eight outgoing governors trying to retire to the Senate in 2023.
Simon Lalong — Plateau State
Lalong is also on a quest to keep sucking on Nigeria’s
titties treasury with a run for the Senate, so we’ll probably be seeing him around when he leaves the Plateau State Government House.
Nyesom Wike — Rivers State
The entertainment value he’s provided in 2022 alone, especially with his music band, makes Wike a great loss to the public service. But it’s also impossible to forget some of his unhinged dictatorial actions, so goodbye to that man.
Aminu Tambuwal — Sokoto State
Tambuwal can finally find time to focus on his ambition to become Nigeria’s president after failing two times. Buhari tried four times before he got the seat and Atiku Abubakar is on his sixth campaign. Never give up, T.
Darius Ishaku — Taraba State
Another outgoing governor trying to jump into the Senate next year. How boring. How predictable.