Every Nigerian Child Hated These 9 Annoying Things About Food

May 13, 2022

As a child, I loved to eat — still do — but there were so many annoying things about food I hated because they stressed me out mentally and physically. Suffering doesn’t even begin to describe what I went through. I’m sure many people can relate to the list I’ve mentioned below. And of course, washing plates is part of it. 

Washing big piles of plates

See let me tell you the worst part about washing plates as a child: it wasn’t washing the disgusting pots that had burnt at the bottom. Or having to scrape off the wet food from plates because your family members didn’t have table manners. The worst part was having to wash everything by yourself. It’s giving child labour.

Eating rice at home 

Nothing was more heartbreaking than hearing, “There’s rice at home,” whenever you asked your parents about buying food outside. I used to wonder about the type of poverty my family was going through. Although, now that I’m an adult that spends her own money, I can relate hard. 

Cleaning up dead animals

Washing chicken was a struggle, but it was nothing compared to cleaning fish or snails. Having to remove fish guts was quite traumatising for me. As for snails, the slime wasn’t even the major problem; it was the leftover smell on your hands that I couldn’t get over. 

 RELATED: What Your Reaction to Killing a Chicken for the First Time Says About You

Cutting onions and pepper

Cutting onions and pepper was the ghetto. Even before the onions started to make your eyes water, you would already be crying in anticipation because that shit hurt like hell.  Even as an adult, I’m still scared to cut onions. No child should ever be put through such pain, please. If your mother was like mine, she’d get upset for wasting time and not cutting properly. Mummy please, my eyes are burning and my hands are stinging. Do am if e easy. 

Going to the market to blend pepper and tomatoes

Walking under the sun with a big bowl of tomatoes and pepper in your hand wasn’t a task for the weak. You had to go all the way to the woman selling tomatoes down the road who had the blue pepper grinder. That thing was so slow and took forever to grind.  After standing in the hot sun, waiting for the thing to finish,   you had to take the heavy blended mixture back.  Life tuff. 

Not being allowed to eat two pieces of meat 

I could never understand why this was a thing. As a growing child, was I not the one who actually needed two pieces of meat for proper nutrition? Why was I being denied my rights? 

Putting on the stove 

Putting on a typical Nigerian stove was such a long and complicated process that it felt like you needed a special degree for it. The most annoying part was putting that thing in the middle that covered the fire, without getting burnt. It was a valuable life skill.  Why isn’t it on my CV?

Picking Beans 

There was nothing that could make picking beans interesting, absolutely nothing. And our parents knew this. That’s why they passed it on to their children the moment they could. Picking beans taught me patience, I can’t lie. 

Opening ice cream and seeing soup inside

Fun fact, I took this picture. This is a container from my freezer. 

This is where every Nigerian’s trust issues began. The heartbreak that came from opening an ice cream container and seeing Egusi soup is worse than the heartbreak from any Yoruba man. 

ALSO READ: If You Commit These 8 Food-Related Atrocities, You’re Childish

Join The Conversation

Bring a friend.

You'll like this

Watch

Now on Zikoko

July 4, 2022

Is love enough or is it all about money? How do you receive either when you had a broken childhood? These are the questions *Kate answers in her story about unlearning the idea that love is equivalent to enduring financial struggles with her partner.

July 4, 2022

When women refuse to follow society’s script, all hell breaks loose. We receive a range of reactions — from parents weeping to random people’s comments — and we’re sick of it. Here’s a list of things you shouldn’t say to women who don’t want kids.

July 4, 2022

Lending people money can be very risky. You have to be ready to fight or say bye-bye to your money for the sake of peace. If you’ve already made the terrible mistake of giving out your hard-earned money, then you can never be too prepared for the process of getting it back. We put together […]

Recommended Quizzes

January 2, 2020

Do you have even a single romantic bone in your body? Well, if you’re not sure about just how sweet and thoughtful you can be to someone you love, that’s what this quiz is here to answer. 11 Quizzes For Nigerians Who Are Ready To Marry  Are you ready to marry? Take these quizzes.

October 10, 2019

2019 is certainly Burna Boy’s year, but, if we are being honest, so was 2018. Since his transcendent mixtape, Outside, the afro-fusion star has refused to get his foot of our necks — dropping a string of fantastic singles and then capping it all off with his career-best album, African Giant.  So, in a bid […]

March 24, 2020

While we know that a lot of the best Nigerian artists deservedly have fans across generations, that won’t stop us from attempting to guess how old you are based on your taste in Nigerian music. So, take this quiz to see if we got it right:

November 25, 2019

We already guessed how many people you’ve slept with, and y’all were out here denying the truth. Anyway, we won’t hold that against you. This time, however, we’ve created a quiz that predicts who you’ll sleep with next — so you can either prepare or try (unsuccessfully) to prevent it. So, take and see:

More from Chopist

June 26, 2022

Foods have different levels of chemistry, much in the same way people do. Beans isn’t any different. If you love beans, then here are seven foods that make the experience even better. Bread If Captain America were a meal, he’d be beans and bread. Nobody knows exactly what makes it so delicious. Is it the […]

Watch

Trending Videos

Zikoko Originals

December 14, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
November 2, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
October 26, 2020
A collection of videos documenting some of the events of the EndSARS protests.
June 22, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
June 22, 2020
Hacked is an interesting new series by Zikoko made up of fictional but hilarious chat conversations.
June 4, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
June 2, 2020
Quickie is a video series where everyone featured gets only one minute to rant, review or do absolutely anything.
May 14, 2020
Isolation Diary is a Zikoko series that showcases what isolation is like for one young Nigerian working from home due to the Coronavirus pandemic.
March 12, 2020
Life is already hard. Deciding where to eat and get the best lifestyle experiences, isn't something you should stress about. Let VRSUS do that for you.

Z! Stacks

Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in:

Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.
X