A Very Strong Case For Eba and Okro Soup

June 12, 2020

Good day ladies and gentlemen of the jury. I am Lawyer Kunle Keating, and I stand before you distinguished fellows today on behalf of my clients Mr. Eba and Miss Okro soup who, for no cogent reason, have been ostracised and discriminated against, up to the point where they are generally excluded at parties. My arguments today will be eye-opening. Please pay attention.

Nigerian Eba (How To Make Eba) - My Active Kitchen

The case of my client Mr. Eba is a typical case of what happens when people become rich and abandon their old friends and previous destiny helpers. This is Mr. Eba who has served (and still continues to serve) humankind at very little cost. With only garri and hot water, Mr. Eba is summoned to enter belle and fulfil nutritutional purposes. Even when it is cold or two days old, Mr. Eba is still a knight in shining armour.

Why is it now that when humankind decide to throw major parties, they do not deem it fit to invite my client, Mr. Eba? Instead, they go after Lady Amala and Dr. Semo, people who do not seem to want to associate themselves with all and sundry?

Igbo burials: How Nigeria will bid farewell to Achebe - BBC News

Or why is it that the only parties my client gets smuggled into are burial ceremonies and other events where you sometimes feel guilty for eating too much? Why is my client not served at wedding parties? What is it about my client that makes him unworthy for the AMVCA after party?

And now, to Miss Okro:

We live in a world where women are speaking up for their rights and working actively to dismantle the patriarchy. But it is rather sad that nobody is willing to take up the case of my dear client, Miss Okro who has been silenced even before she is able to speak.

Miss Okro is blessed with all the goodness one might ever need. She is unassuming, and even though she does not agree with certain members of the food community like Dr. Bread and Evangelist Rice, we can all agree that my client, Miss Okro, is a lady who rises by lifting others. An example is how she accommodates ponmo, beef, shaki, even bits of ugu or bitterleaf. How come these squatters get served at parties but my client is left behind? It is a clear case of somebody you taught in the exam scoring high while you, the teacher, fails woefully.

Swallow" The Truth | Swallow food, Nigeria food, Ghanaian food

Without further ado, my lord, I urge you to consider with grave urgency, the injustice, discrimination and sidelining that my clients have endured over the years. They only demand one simple thing: SERVE THEM AT PARTIES. Let guests feel the delight of their taste.

Before I close, I would like to ask everyone seated here one question: how would you feel if, by virtue of your qualities, you are denied a spot that belongs to you?

Image

I, Kunle Keating stand before you today as a lawyer of the utmost integrity. My clients Mr. Eba and Miss Okro do not seek to persecute anybody. Rather, they demand for a seat at the table. Fairness and equity. My lord, ladies and gentlemen of the jury, shall we close our eyes and let injustice prevail?

As you take your decision, I leave you with the evergreen words of Martin Luther King Jr.: The moral arc of the universe is long, but it bend towards justice.

I rest my case.

Kunle Ologunro

Join The Conversation

Bring a friend.

You'll like this

September 19, 2020

Look, necessity is the mother of invention. Some foods can do other fulfilling things, alright. Let’s find out. 1. Fried yam as a choker. Need to be choked? Fried yam dey for you. Don’t say you got the tip from us. 2. Cucumber as a pleasure giver. Do I need to explain this? Duh. Go […]

March 7, 2020

Dodo (fried plantain) has been the reigning Nigerian king for a while now. But while dodo holds forte here, Alloco is busy kinging its way across dinner tables and meals across Africa. This post will tell you all you need to know about Alloco. It will also make you wonder if dodo is really the […]

Watch

Now on Zikoko

November 28, 2020

Tucked deep in the south-west, you’ve probably passed through Osun state on your way to other places in Nigeria. You probably didn’t spare the state another glance. Apart from playing host to Obafemi Awolowo University, arguably the best federal university in Nigeria (haters will say it’s a lie), Osun state is also home to a […]

Cross River by-election
November 27, 2020

There will be by-elections in Cross River and some states other in Nigeria on December 5, 2020, and we’re counting down to the elections. We have written about everything you need to know about the by-elections and all the candidates in the Bayelsa West and Central Senatorial by-election. In Cross River state, the death of […]

November 27, 2020

Women are often overlooked in conversations about marital infidelity, thanks to the notion that women aren’t very inclined to cheat on their spouses. I spoke to six married women who have had relationships without their husbands’ knowledge. They had some pretty interesting stories. Editorial note: This article was updated to include Chidinma’s entry which was […]

Recommended Quizzes

November 27, 2019

Do you have a face that could make angels jealous, or should you really be walking around with a nylon bag over your head so you don’t scare children? Well, this quiz is here to answer that by telling you exactly how good-looking you are. Take and find out: 11 Quizzes That’ll Separate The Ajepakos […]

October 30, 2019

2010 was a game-changing one for Nollywood, with our movies making serious cash and getting international acclaim. So, which of these hits released between 2010 and 2019 — from the pace-setting The Wedding Party to the divisive Trip To Jamaica — best suits your personality? Well, that’s what this quiz is here to answer:

how much of an ajebutter
February 12, 2020

Are you an ajebutter or not? Well, if you’ve gone through life blissfully unaware of its harshness, then you probably are. Now, we want to know just how high you rank on that ajebutter scale, using your food preferences as a (very accurate) measure. Take to find out:

November 20, 2019

Last month, we thoughtfully made a quiz telling you guys exactly when you’ll marry, but some of you claimed that your spouse was nowhere to be found. Well, now we’ve created one that’ll tell you exactly who you’ll be dragging down that aisle. Take and start planning that wedding: 11 Quizzes For Nigerians Who Are […]

More from Chopist

November 28, 2020

Tucked deep in the south-west, you’ve probably passed through Osun state on your way to other places in Nigeria. You probably didn’t spare the state another glance. Apart from playing host to Obafemi Awolowo University, arguably the best federal university in Nigeria (haters will say it’s a lie), Osun state is also home to a […]

November 15, 2020

Food is great for nutrition and it’s also fun to eat. However, some foods are not for enjoyment but to test your management and budgeting skills. Any wrong step and you’re left with an incomplete meal and faced with the fact that your management skills suck. Here are some of them. 1. Yam and egg […]

Watch

Trending Videos

Zikoko Originals

November 2, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
October 26, 2020
A collection of videos documenting some of the events of the EndSARS protests.
June 22, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
June 22, 2020
Hacked is an interesting new series by Zikoko made up of fictional but hilarious chat conversations.
June 4, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
June 2, 2020
Quickie is a video series where everyone featured gets only one minute to rant, review or do absolutely anything.
May 14, 2020
Isolation Diary is a Zikoko series that showcases what isolation is like for one young Nigerian working from home due to the Coronavirus pandemic.
March 12, 2020
Life is already hard. Deciding where to eat and get the best lifestyle experiences, isn't something you should stress about. Let VRSUS do that for you.
February 6, 2020
Who doesn't want to find love? In our bid to help, we paired up a bunch of single Nigerians, sending them on an all-expense paid date, and interviewing them before and after they met.

Z! Stacks

Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in:

Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.
X