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  • 1. ‘Oya go and bring your books, lesson teacher is here’

    2. “Is it me you are talking to like that? Go and break cane from the tree outside”

    3. Anything that has to do with drinking agbo!

    4. “Aunty Tolani that fed you akpu and banga when you were three is on the line from London, come and talk to her”

    5. When the Channels movie you’ve been waiting for starts at 10, and that’s when your parents know they’ll tell you to go to bed

    6. When you see your friends playing outside, but your parents put you on compulsory house arrest because they’re kidnapping children

    7. When your siblings are sleeping and your parents start calling them, you already know you’re the automatic scape goat to do the work for them

  • 1. You are very glad that your baby has finally arrived.

    My joy is too full.

    2. After giving you serious wahala for 9 months, you can finally rest.

    Or so you thought.

    3. You, when you have to feed the baby for the 50th time in a day.

    Is this how I die?

    4. When your mother-in-law now says you must start sitting on hot water-bucket every morning.

    You people did not tell me this one before now!

    5. When your baby finally sleeps and you can get some rest…

    Because you’ve not slept in days.

    6. Only for you to hear one yama yama cry again.

    Which kind of baby is this one?

    7. How your husband disappears when the baby starts wahala.

    There is God o!

    8. The amount of water you have to drink everyday.

    Because you and thirst are now best friends.

    9. And your appetite has you like this every time:

    It is not kuku your fault.

    10. You, when your mother-in-law starts talking about another child.

    Not understanding.

    11. This was you, the first time you had to suck your baby’s snotty nose.

    Or clean poo poo. What a disgust!

    12. When people start giving you different baby care advise from left and right

    Awon Advisors-General of the Federation.

    13. You, when someone mishandles your baby.

    “Eskis sir, are they doing you from the village?”

  • 1. When she wants to know all your friends and their family members even now you’re an adult.

    2. When she keeps trying to see who you’re texting.

    3. When she is still trying to police your clothes and hair.

    4. When she tries to use morning devotion to find out what you’re doing under the guise of “praying for you”.

    5. When you come home and meet her gisting and carrying on with your friends.

    6. When she starts trying to act like a therapist for you and your partner.

    7. When she enters your room and just starts opening cupboards and drawers.

    8. When she starts fighting you for not “talking” enough even though you talk to her everyday.

  • 1. When your teacher announces the date for the party you’re like:

    Celebration galore!

    2. When the class now chooses you to collect the party donations

    It is an honor and privilege to use your money to buy sweet!

    3. You, when your mum buys you fine dress for the party

    My slay will be complete.

    4. When you finish making your fine Bob-Marley, you’re like:

    Because I’m the queen!

    5. How you enter the class on the day of the party

    Slayonce!

    6. When it’s time for menu-menu, you’re like:

    This jollof is low-key the only reason I’m here!

    7. You, when the teacher says it’s time for ‘musical chairs’

    Ahh shoki!

    8. When the teacher gives you a nice gift, you’re like:

    So this teacher can give something other than beating and homework?

  • 1. When you wake up from them banging on your door because knocking like a normal person is too mainstream.

    2. When they start dragging with you because you no longer want to attend their church/mosque.

    3. When it’s time for you to decide a degree and your parent’s don’t hear medicine, accounting or engineering.

    4. When you come 18th out of 20 students in class, your father is like:

    5. When they suddenly decide that they know the most fashion and won’t allow you wear what you want in peace.

    6. When they won’t let you hear word because you think their 7pm curfew is ridiculous at your age.

    7. When the marriage discussion comes up, your mother is like:

    8. When you give an opinion different to the one they like, your parents are like:

    9. When they fight you because you don’t spend enough time with them.

    10. And then fight you again for spending too much time with them and have now become anti social.

  • It was no surprise this video of these seriously adorable girls, Alexis and Ava, went viral- everyone loves twins.

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BME5E7JAnL_/?taken-by=mccluretwins

    People even made memes out of their pictures, but that’s not why we’re here.

    https://twitter.com/I_am_doxa/status/793775923581620224

    These beautiful 3-year-olds are the children of Justin and Aminat McClure, who happens to be a beautiful Nigerian woman.

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BMKvziYD8_P/?taken-by=mccluretwins

    It’s hard to get over how cute they are.

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BMumGfXg7Db/?taken-by=mccluretwins

    When their mother told them they were twins.

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BL_z7q6Al_C/?taken-by=mccluretwins

    When they were dragging their daddy for eating all their food.

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BLwnLB_j521/?taken-by=mccluretwins

    When they wished him happy birthday.

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BLbx9BYgASF/?taken-by=mccluretwins

    When they were doing amebo.

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BMZT1XGgC9L/?taken-by=mccluretwins

  • While you were eating eba instead of getting fit, this 3-year-old Iranian boy has become a certified member of fitfam ministry.

    Maybe he should come and represent Nigeria in the next Olympics, we’ll kuku manage him like that.

    And while many of you refused to face your work, young Ifedayo Ali-Landing has been slaying at Cello.

    Ifetayo started playing at a very young agae and has won several awards at 13. Just look at her play when she was 6.

    These little children are so amazing, haters can’t even touch them! Share your thoughts on this in the comments section.

  • A few weeks ago, we told you about the amazing work being done to help children in need of prosthetics via the STANBIC initiative, “together for a limb”.

    In addition to the much-needed prosthetics, the kids also received an Educational Trust Fund of N1.5 million each!

    After the 3km charity walk in Abuja which was attended by hundreds of people, the children were presented with their trust fund cheques by First Lady of Zamfara, Hajiya Asmau Yari, who represented the First lady of Nigeria.

    Here is Fatima, who was born with a congenital deformity which required the amputation of her leg.

    Little Aliyu’s foot was crushed by a keke driver, and now he has a comfortable prosthetic and the promise of an amazing education.

    Here is a cross section of some of the children the initiative has been able to help.

    The “Together for a limb” initiative is doing some incredible work. Children deserve the very best life has to offer, regardless of any physical or financial impediments they might have found themselves in.

  • 1. These adorable princesses

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BK1bZw8guVt/?taken-by=m12photography

    2. These cute twin sisters

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BKbEUwSg01N/?taken-by=m12photography

    3. Hello cowboys!

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BJ0ghcAA6lK/?taken-by=m12photography

    4. Big sister goals

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BIUzewCArMC/?taken-by=m12photography

    5. When you’re no longer the only child.

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BFM7kciLlJp/?taken-by=m12photography

    6. Who doesn’t want cute babies like this please?

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BERiOtLLlMq/?taken-by=m12photography

    7. How adorable are these sisters?

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BD_Q5yErlC9/?taken-by=m12photography

    8. They’re so pretty in pink

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BCLcWdirlBe/?taken-by=m12photography

    9. They’re too cute for words

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BBxV4YYLlLg/?taken-by=m12photography

    10. Just see the look on her face

    https://www.instagram.com/p/_86a-PLlJ9/?taken-by=m12photography

  • 1. When your friends say you are too close to your mum.

    Who asked you please?

    2. When you start giving her gist but you realise it can get you in trouble so you say it’s about your friend.

    Before you enter another wahala!

    3. When she wants to follow you out, you’re like:

    I love you ma, but no!

    4. When she is angry with you and starts using your gist against you.

    Is that how you used to do?

    5. How your father looks at you and your mother when you start gossiping:

    “Just look at you people!”

    6. When your siblings start complaining she is giving you preferential treatment.

    Please go and disturb your best friend leave mine alone!

    7. When your mother’s friends from school come around and she forgets all about you.

    What a cold, lonely world.

    8. Both of you when her arch rival finally does oversabi and embarrasses herself.

    Pele ma!