6 Nigerians Talk About The One Who Got Away

August 9, 2021

Aminat, 22

Last year, I stumbled on the friend of a guy I dated about five years ago. He looked really familiar, but I couldn’t quite place the face. I had turned back to stare a couple of times and had decided if I turn this last time and he’s still there, I’d walk up to him. When I turned slowly, I didn’t see him anymore and I took that as a sign from the Universe. A few seconds later, someone tapped my shoulder and it turned out to be him. We kicked things off from there, and our first date was super intense. The sexual energy was 101%, and we discovered we had crushes on each other before I dated his friend.

After multiple conversations about the obvious fact that we were into each other and wanted this, he explicitly told me it couldn’t work because I’m his friend’s ex. It infuriated me because I wasn’t even speaking to my ex at all, but this past presence in my life is still denying me some form of happiness. I truly mourned what would’ve been, but he and I still talk.

Yinka, 25

I met him on Twitter this year, around May. We didn’t talk much at first, but that didn’t take long to change. When it did, the connection was a lot. We shared the same values, had a lot in common, and it was obvious where it was headed. However, I wasn’t ready to be in a relationship. I told him and he seemed okay waiting. One time, we had a little misunderstanding and I stopped hearing from him. It took me a little while to reach out to him and by the time I got around to it a bit more than a day later, he had moved on.

It turns out he’s had previous experiences with waiting to be with someone and felt we were headed the same way.
He told me he couldn’t keep waiting for me to decide if I wanted to be with him or not. The funny thing is that the timeout we had made me realise how much of a keeper he is. That’s why I had decided to take that leap, but I decided a little too late. He was no longer interested. I wish things had gone differently.

Amaka, 20

I had a crush on a guy in my school for about a year, but I didn’t have the mind to tell him. Eventually, I found out he had a girlfriend, and that broke me. So, in order to be close to him, I had to become friends with his girlfriend. It worked, but then I learnt he was leaving the country soon, so I started to pray the embassy wouldn’t grant him visa.

Unfortunately, my prayer wasn’t answered. He left the country and I am still angry at myself for not telling him how I felt for him. It’s been four years since the last time I saw him. If he ever comes back, I will tell him I loved him.

Jane, 21

There was this guy I really liked even though he wasn’t 100% my spec. I was really into him. He kept saying he wasn’t ready for a relationship, so I waited for him for eight months. During those eight months, he was having flings with other people, but I waited while he kept saying he wasn’t ready. It really hurt because I liked him so much, I even wanted to ask him out. Eventually, I let him go, and I met someone way better.

Femi, 41

There was a woman I met through one of my brother’s friends. I knew I liked her when I didn’t want to go further with her after we kissed. I was a serial cheater, but I couldn’t bear to break her heart. She knew I had a girlfriend and really didn’t mind, but I just could not. I guess I liked her that much; just not enough to leave my girlfriend whom I later married. For some reason, she keeps popping into my head on occasion since I separated from my wife. I hope she’s alright wherever she is and that whoever she ended up with, if any, is treating her right.

John, 19

So, it’s this guy who texted me midway through the lockdown. I initially ignored it, but around the #EndSars protests, we started talking again. It took me a while to realise I might have feelings for him. Unfortunately, he’s in Lagos and I’m in Ibadan. I’m not willing to do long distance relationship, plus there are issues and trauma we’ve both agreed we need to work on. Our refusal to date is a mutual agreement, buts it hurts because this is the first time I’m getting non-platonic attention that isn’t toxic. I’m also sad because I feel like I’ll never really get to experience him. I think that by the time things changed for either of us, we’d have outgrown each other. On the bright side, it feels nice to know he’s in my corner.

Zikoko Donation Banner

Help Zikoko keep making the content you love

More than ever, people are turning to Zikoko for stories that matter and content they love. But still, we, like many media organisations, are feeling the financial heat of these times. If you find us valuable, please make a contribution to help keep Zikoko zikoko-ing.

Thank you for your support.

We are also cool with Crypto.

Donation Close
Zikoko Logo

Complete Your Commitment

Donation confirm

Your Contribution is confirmed! Amount

Join The Conversation

Bring a friend.

You'll like this

January 4, 2021

New year’s eve is the one day in the year that carries the hopes of millions of people around the globe. It is the day we round up and settle all affairs of the previous year while looking forward to a new year. Today, I asked Nigerian women about how they spent their new year’s […]

January 2, 2020

Do you have even a single romantic bone in your body? Well, if you’re not sure about just how sweet and thoughtful you can be to someone you love, that’s what this quiz is here to answer. 11 Quizzes For Nigerians Who Are Ready To Marry  Are you ready to marry? Take these quizzes.


Now on Zikoko

November 28, 2022

If you’re a Nigerian student feeling discouraged from pursuing a tertiary education because you can’t afford tuition fees, we have good news for you! You’ll soon be able to get a student loan from the government with zero interest! How’s this possible? The Student Loan Bill provides public university students with financial assistance through the […]

November 28, 2022

Just hours to the planned November 26, 2022 resumption of operations on the Abuja-Kaduna railway corridor, the Federal Government announced a postponement. It’s not the first time the government has postponed a planned resumption since terrorists attacked the railway corridor in March. But more than the government’s erratic announcements and postponements, Nigerians remain worried about […]

Recommended Quizzes

What are you like in a relationship?
February 7, 2020

Your taste in music can say a lot about you, and this time, it’s going to reveal what you are like in a relationship. So, pick a few of your favourite Nigerian love songs, and we’ll let you know if you’re typically a distant, passionate or unbothered partner. Here you go:

October 30, 2019

Kemi Adetiba’s King of Boys movie got a lot of things right, especially casting, so yes, it was a monster hit. Now, we know you may not have put much thought to this, but the personalities of some of the characters closely match yours, and we would like to help you find the perfect match. […]

how tall are you
March 11, 2020

Did your parents give you enough beans when you were growing up? If they did, then you’re probably around 6’0″ and above. Either way, we created a quiz that can guess your current height (pretty accurately, if we do say so ourselves). Take to see if we nailed it:

More from Ships

November 22, 2022

Among the things Douglas* wished for on his 24th birthday, finding love was not one of them. When he met Susie* in 2021, everything seemed right, even though she’s an unemployed student. But she agreed to date him if he promised not to treat her as his dependant.

November 17, 2022

The subjects of this week’s love life, Isoken* (19) and Dami* (21), met at a tutorial centre in 2020. They talk about why she turned him down the first three times he asked her out, lying to her parents about their relationship and dealing with their religious differences. 


Trending Videos

Zikoko Originals

September 13, 2022
Vs The World is a Zikoko original video series that follows best friends Astor and Hassan as they take on the world.
August 23, 2022
Zikoko Ships is a Zikoko Original series where we invite two people who share a relationship to play the Zikoko card games
December 14, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
November 2, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
October 26, 2020
A collection of videos documenting some of the events of the EndSARS protests.
June 22, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
June 22, 2020
Hacked is an interesting new series by Zikoko made up of fictional but hilarious chat conversations.
June 4, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
June 2, 2020
Quickie is a video series where everyone featured gets only one minute to rant, review or do absolutely anything.
May 14, 2020
Isolation Diary is a Zikoko series that showcases what isolation is like for one young Nigerian working from home due to the Coronavirus pandemic.

Z! Stacks

Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in:

Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.