So You Don’t Have To: 5 Must-Read SYDHTs Of 2021

December 31, 2021

Once upon a time, an insane Christian book that claimed the devil created football as a tool to destroy humanity trended on the internet. I did the dirty work of actually reading and recapping it. The article was so popular that I decided to make my recaps into a weekly series named “So You Don’t Have To“, where I find batshit crazy pieces of media (books, movies, etc) and recap them for your pleasure.

I’ve spent the last few days thinking of all the episodes of “So You Don’t Have To” I’ve written in 2021 so as to pick out my absolute best five to put on this list, and I couldn’t. Do you know why?

Because they’re all amazing.

I’m funny as hell and every episode of SYDHT I’ve put out has been groundbreaking. I truly believe that future generations will sit around campfires/classrooms and talk about me like I was Comedian Jesus.

I’m glad we had that talk.

Just because I couldn’t put all of them on this list, here are my five favourite SYDHT episodes of 2021.

I Spoke To A Money Ritual Juju Man So You Don’t Have To

In December of 2020, I was contacted by a self-proclaimed herbalist who claimed he could make me a shit ton of money in a ritual that would NOT require a human life. I was going to ignore him because I don’t do demons but figured I could get a bitching SYDHT episode out of it. And baby, I DID. Read to find out how far down the rabbit hole I went in my attempt to find out how money rituals work.

Click here to read.

I Watched The Nollywood Movie “Suicide Mission” So You Don’t Have To

This 1998 Nollywood movie has everything. The eternally beautiful Regina Askia, Sugar Daddy RMD, old Nollywood witchcraft, necrophilia, telekinesis, trapped souls in groundnut bottles, the main antagonist turning into a dog at the end, much more shit. It also helps that the plot is batshit.

Click here to read it.

I Watched The Music Video For Peter Okoye’s Song “Look Into My Eyes” So You Don’t Have To

Peter Okoye — who now hilariously goes by Mr P — is one half of the defunct music duo P-Square. He and his identical twin brother, Paul, burst onto the scene in 2003 and ran things (things didn’t run them) until they had a fight in 2017 and went their separate ways. In 2018, Peter released the video for a song titled “Look Into My Eyes,” proving his determination to carry on the family tradition of violently ripping off Michael Jackson.

Click here to read it.

I Attended A Moaning Competition So You Don’t Have To

moaning competition

On the 15th of October 2021, a moaning competition took place on Twitter Spaces. I took it upon myself to attend the moaning competition undercover so I could recap the event for those who couldn’t attend or were too ashamed to. I still haven’t recovered. Dollars could speed up my recovery. Send me some.

Click here to read.

I Watched The 2020 Nollywood Movie, “Nneka The Pretty Serpent,” So You Don’t Have To

nneka the pretty serpent 2020 poster

The makers of this iteration of “Nneka the Pretty Serpent” tried to solve the problem of the original movie (not having an actual plot) by giving a reason for Nneka’s murder spree. But due to the unintentionally hilarious execution and unnecessarily complex backstory, it doesn’t quite work and is confusing as hell.

Click here to read.



Join The Conversation

Bring a friend.

You'll like this

Watch

Now on Zikoko

Recommended Quizzes

November 28, 2019

There are so many talented and stunning Nollywood actors that make it hard not to fall in love with them. So, while we all know the likelihood of us ending up with any of them is super low, it’s still fun to imagine a world where we actually stood a chance, and that’s why this […]

April 1, 2020

Everyone has a Nigerian bank that matches their personality. You could either be as likeable as GTB, as efficient as Access or as mature as First Bank. Either way, all you have to do is take this quiz and we’ll let you know with almost 100% certainty. So, go ahead:

April 9, 2020

At some point in life, we all learnt that someone can be very intelligent and still lack common sense. That’s the difference between being book smart and being street smart. If you’re not sure where on the spectrum you fall, well, that’s what this quiz is here to tell you. Take it:

November 27, 2019

Do you have a face that could make angels jealous, or should you really be walking around with a nylon bag over your head so you don’t scare children? Well, this quiz is here to answer that by telling you exactly how good-looking you are. Take and find out: 11 Quizzes For People Who Aren’t […]

More from So You Don't Have To

Watch

Trending Videos

Zikoko Originals

December 14, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
November 2, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
October 26, 2020
A collection of videos documenting some of the events of the EndSARS protests.
June 22, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
June 22, 2020
Hacked is an interesting new series by Zikoko made up of fictional but hilarious chat conversations.
June 4, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
June 2, 2020
Quickie is a video series where everyone featured gets only one minute to rant, review or do absolutely anything.
May 14, 2020
Isolation Diary is a Zikoko series that showcases what isolation is like for one young Nigerian working from home due to the Coronavirus pandemic.
March 12, 2020
Life is already hard. Deciding where to eat and get the best lifestyle experiences, isn't something you should stress about. Let VRSUS do that for you.

Z! Stacks

Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in:

Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.
X