The 8 Times It’s Okay To Ask ‘How Was Your Night?’

March 9, 2020

For the life of me, I have never understood why people ask ‘how was your night’.

How was your night

What response do these special people expect when they ask this? Do they think I’ll sit them down and explain that my eye is twitching because I spent all night binge-watching Assistant Madams and writing a thesis as to why no series will ever top its ‘₦100 billion inheritance storyline’? 

How was your night

Or how my boyfriend complained about my sleep farts for the fifth night in a row (This is a real medical condition, I dare you to prove me wrong).

How was your night

I can’t make sense of the ‘how was your night’ question, no matter how hard I try. That is, unless it’s in relation to any of these scenarios, then it is A-okay, ask away.

“So how was your night now” – if the rapture happened the night before, and you want to confirm that your colleague is also going to hell with you. 

How was your night

Have to find out if he’s just taking 30 minutes break from heaven somehow.

‘Well rested? How was your night?’ – your sleep demon checking in to confirm he fucked up your night completely.

Hope you didn’t get too many of those nightmares you’ve been visiting prayer mountains for this time?

“Yesterday sha, so how was your night?” – after you accidentally shat yourself at the office Christmas party the night before and you want to make sure everyone is on the same page with pretending it didn’t happen.

How was your night

Please play along and say you drank a little too much parago to remember last night. Plis.

“Mr.Man, and how was your night?” – typical Nigerian mother trying to confirm her son isn’t still sulking after taking the 20k he received to buy biscuit for ‘safekeeping.’

How was your night

‘I know it was fine. All your nights are fine.’

‘I hate sleeping apart. How was your night?’ – Madam Koi Koi asking her dismembered head how its night was.

How was your night?

Did you blink fast to ward off the mosquitoes like I advised?

And how was your night? Hope you didn’t have to sacrifice … too much sleep?’- Nigerian witches sharing inside jokes after deciding to sacrifice their favourite family member in last night’s meeting.

How was your night

“Hope you didn’t lose… anything important?”

Gee, how was your night?’ – Your anxiety and depression pretending like they didn’t fuck up your whole night with self-doubt.

Hope you’re feeling nice and wholesome this morning? And that thing you have no reason to worry about doesn’t somehow magically become a priority to handle. Hopefully.

‘Rough night? Did you get any sleep?’ Babies pretending they didn’t shut the whole house down with their crying from 2:10 AM.

“Sorry your night sucked, here’s me being incredibly cute to compensate.”

So, how was your night? 




Boyin Plumptre

Join The Conversation

Bring a friend.

You'll like this

October 28, 2019

Growing up in Nigeria can be all shades of awesome, weird and just plain insane, depending on the kind of Nigerian parents you had. But, the awesomeness of playground time cannot be disputed, sometimes I want to shed off this adult skin and dance in the rain while playing suwe or ten-ten. We’ve listed seven […]

Watch

Now on Zikoko

January 19, 2021

When it comes to period products, there are a lot of things that need to change. A lot. So, we made a list with the help of the people of Twitter 1) Price They are too expensive. Period products should be free, because nobody chose to have their period. These products are essential, and nobody […]

January 19, 2021

The idea of lifelong friendships sounds nice, but it doesn’t always happen. Friends fall out or drift apart all the time for myriads of reasons. For some people, it happens because their friend got married and decided that they didn’t want to be friends anymore. This is a lot more common than you’d think, so […]

January 19, 2021

Admit it. You’ve always wanted to know which of the OG Nollywood campus babes you are. Now you can, just take this quiz and find out which of these bad bitches you are on the inside. For more like this, check out Zikoko Memes

Recommended Quizzes

how tall are you
March 11, 2020

Did your parents give you enough beans when you were growing up? If they did, then you’re probably around 6’0″ and above. Either way, we created a quiz that can guess your current height (pretty accurately, if we do say so ourselves). Take to see if we nailed it:

April 3, 2020

While the rest of the world loves to treat our continent like a country, there are actually 54 African countries. So, in a bid to test your knowledge (and educate you), we’ve created a quiz to see how many of their capitals you can correctly name. Go ahead:

October 10, 2019

2019 is certainly Burna Boy’s year, but, if we are being honest, so was 2018. Since his transcendent mixtape, Outside, the afro-fusion star has refused to get his foot of our necks — dropping a string of fantastic singles and then capping it all off with his career-best album, African Giant.  So, in a bid […]

November 1, 2019

Twitter is buzzing right now, bringing a new conversation to the concept of cool vs not-so-cool, especially in relationships. If you’ve been thinking about how much of a red flag you are, why don’t you let this quiz help you decide once and for all?

December 3, 2019

Are you a professional Yoruba demon? Are you walking around in search of whose life you can wreck at any given time? Well, this quiz knows exactly how many hearts you’ve shattered to date, and before you lie that your result is inaccurate, just remember that Zikoko is never wrong. Now, take it and be […]

More from Inside Life

January 19, 2021

The idea of lifelong friendships sounds nice, but it doesn’t always happen. Friends fall out or drift apart all the time for myriads of reasons. For some people, it happens because their friend got married and decided that they didn’t want to be friends anymore. This is a lot more common than you’d think, so […]

January 16, 2021

The subject of this week’s Sex Life is a 24-year-old heterosexual man who feels the size of his penis is preventing him from living his best sex life. He talks about how being shamed by multiple women has scarred him.

Watch

Trending Videos

Zikoko Originals

December 14, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
November 2, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
October 26, 2020
A collection of videos documenting some of the events of the EndSARS protests.
June 22, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
June 22, 2020
Hacked is an interesting new series by Zikoko made up of fictional but hilarious chat conversations.
June 4, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
June 2, 2020
Quickie is a video series where everyone featured gets only one minute to rant, review or do absolutely anything.
May 14, 2020
Isolation Diary is a Zikoko series that showcases what isolation is like for one young Nigerian working from home due to the Coronavirus pandemic.
March 12, 2020
Life is already hard. Deciding where to eat and get the best lifestyle experiences, isn't something you should stress about. Let VRSUS do that for you.

Z! Stacks

Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in:

Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.
X