Rihanna posts a picture holding a football, and everyone thinks she’s performing at the Superbowl. I’m surprised you guys have this much faith in her. Have you people learnt nothing from Mummy Fenty?
I don’t think she’s coming to perform at the Superbowl. I think she’s coming to do one of these nine things.
Fenty football club
If there can be Fenty skin and makeup, why can’t there be a Fenty FC? Best believe Riri bought a football club, and they’ll compete at the Superbowl. There’s nothing our dear business mogul can’t do.
You’ll get to the Superbowl and see Rihanna standing on the stage, giving everyone makeup and skincare tips. Everyone will have Fenty Beauty goody bags beneath their seats, and they’ll get to practice as she speaks.
She may be coming to announce her new sweat-proof makeup line specifically for sports players. She wants them to look sexy as they play. Maybe she’s even producing the Fenty FC uniforms.
She’ll sing the national anthem
Yes, she’s singing, but who says she’ll sing her own music? She’ll get on stage, sing the national anthem and get off. We’ll take whatever we get sha.
She’ll announce the album coming and say sike
Rihanna has been promising us this album for the last six years, and we still have nothing. I feel like she’ll come on stage, announce that the album is ready and she wants to play it for us, then say “sike” and sing Umbrella.
She’s coming to show off her son
We haven’t seen Baby Fenty since he was born. And because Mummy Fenty knows how much we want to see the baby, she’s decided to show him off at one of the biggest sports events in the world. She’s a billionaire; she can do whatever she wants.
She’s marrying ASAP on stage
There’s a chance Rihanna wants to use the Superbowl as her wedding venue. We don’t know why she would do that, but it’s possible.
She’s coming to tell everyone to shut up about the album
People have been asking my babe about the album, and she’s tired. I’m sure she’s getting on the Superbowl stage to tell everyone to shut the fuck up and drop the album talk. She’ll tell us that the album is never coming, and everyone should buy Fenty cutlery.
She’ll announce that she’s running for president in 2027
After becoming a successful business mogul who’s now a billionaire, the next best thing is for her to become president of the United States. I mean, what else is left?