4 Reasons You Shouldn’t Tell Anyone You’re Going Abroad.

August 22, 2019

So you’ve had your visa interview, got your visa and you’re finally about to take that trip you’ve planned for years. But your mom has told you not to tell anyone you’re travelling until you get back. You’re wondering why? We’ll tell you. 

Your village people don’t want you to travel

This one goes without saying. If your village people, who hate your family because you’re more successful than them find out you’re traveling, they can easily get you. They’re witches so they’re in the air; you’re in a plane, so it goes without saying that you’re in the air. It’s the best place to get you. All they need to do is make the aircraft develop faults that would lead to a crash. If you’re not going to tell people you’re not travelling, family members top that list.

“This boy is not going anywhere”

You’re not Santa Claus

Traveling to the abroad means you have money. Nigerians don’t want to know otherwise. You’re going there to blow one million dollars everyday so why shouldn’t your family and friends get their share? They’ll disturb you everyday to buy shoes and chocolates for them. And if you say no, you’re proud and evil. Don’t say no, just don’t let anyone know you’re traveling. 

To Avoid “Whining”

Okay maybe this isn’t one of your mother’s reasons but it’s a valid reason. Once you mistakenly step inside an airplane, people automatically think you’ve arrived. When they see you, they start calling you “Money man” or “Oga Madam”. When they start using names like that for you, people will think you have money and your helper might think you don’t need their help because you’re already an Oga Madam. You know how Nigerians are. 

To Avoid Deliveries

You’re not DHL. It’s when you travel people will begin to remember that they have an uncle in Atlanta that they want to take fish to, and get shoes from. Or that they want to buy Crocs. And they won’t pay for your extra luggage. Let’s be guided please. 

And if you still go ahead and tell people you’re travelling, after all we’ve done for you, whatever befalls you is your problem not ours. You know what they say about a word? Well, that’s right; it’s enough for the wise.

Avatar

Join The Conversation

Bring a friend.

You'll like this

Watch

Now on Zikoko

March 4, 2021

Prior to what the internet and that certain website say, sex can be very awkward. If there is one thing that can ease the tension, it is music. As we are in the business of being generous, we have complied 7 foolproof methods to help you create the perfect sex playlist 1.  Ask your father […]

March 4, 2021

Cadbury Nigeria, a part of Mondelēz International, and producers of the iconic Bournvita, a cocoa beverage drink, has rewarded the top three winning schools in the second edition of the Bourn Factor School Talent Hunt Competition, which took place nationwide, in 2020. The winners were unveiled at a media parley held at the Company’s head […]

March 4, 2021

Onscreen chemistry is one thing Old Nollywood got right. Some actors and actresses just had this thing that left you rooting for them hard even when you don’t think you should be. We decided to rank the top five couples from Old Nollywood that were everything. Genevieve Nnaji and Emeka Ike I know Tony Umez […]

Recommended Quizzes

December 5, 2019

We already tried to guess how much you have in your account and your current net worth, and we think we did a pretty great job (keep any complaints to yourself). Now, we’re going to try and guess your monthly salary based on your relationship with money. Oya, take the quiz: 11 Timed Quizzes For […]

December 3, 2019

Are you a professional Yoruba demon? Are you walking around in search of whose life you can wreck at any given time? Well, this quiz knows exactly how many hearts you’ve shattered to date, and before you lie that your result is inaccurate, just remember that Zikoko is never wrong. Now, take it and be […]

November 30, 2019

With No Nut November FINALLY coming to an end, we’ve decided to mark the torturous month with some more horny content. After quizzes that guessed how many people you’ve slept with, how good you are in bed and who you’ll sleep with next, this one will guess when next you’ll get lucky. Take it to […]

April 1, 2020

Everyone has a Nigerian bank that matches their personality. You could either be as likeable as GTB, as efficient as Access or as mature as First Bank. Either way, all you have to do is take this quiz and we’ll let you know with almost 100% certainty. So, go ahead:

November 12, 2019

Are you a single pringle, stuck in a complicated situationship or happily married to the love of your life? This quiz is here to guess your current relationship status, and as you know, Zikoko quizzes are incredibly accurate (don’t quote us). So, give a shot:

More from Inside Life

March 4, 2021

Prior to what the internet and that certain website say, sex can be very awkward. If there is one thing that can ease the tension, it is music. As we are in the business of being generous, we have complied 7 foolproof methods to help you create the perfect sex playlist 1.  Ask your father […]

March 4, 2021

Cadbury Nigeria, a part of Mondelēz International, and producers of the iconic Bournvita, a cocoa beverage drink, has rewarded the top three winning schools in the second edition of the Bourn Factor School Talent Hunt Competition, which took place nationwide, in 2020. The winners were unveiled at a media parley held at the Company’s head […]

March 3, 2021

First, we thought, if Nigerian musicians had side hustles, what would they do? Now, we’re asking, “if Bible characters had side hustles, what would they do?” Here’s what we have: 1. Moses- Fitness trainer You can’t go far in the book of Exodus without seeing that Oga Moses has climbed mountain again. He first led […]

March 3, 2021

The dating scene Is a messy place and everyone has their spec. If you haven’t figured out what works for you, we’ve been generous enough to make a list. 1. People that have money  Money makes romance sweeter, to be honest. People will probably call you a gold-digger, but is it their gold you are […]

March 2, 2021

Nigerian mums are some of the most special women in the world, and in honour of women’s month, we will be sharing some surprising and confusing behaviours a lot of them exhibit. If your mum does none of the things in this list, give a double offering in church on Sunday. No one: Nigerian mothers […]

Watch

Trending Videos

Zikoko Originals

December 14, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
November 2, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
October 26, 2020
A collection of videos documenting some of the events of the EndSARS protests.
June 22, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
June 22, 2020
Hacked is an interesting new series by Zikoko made up of fictional but hilarious chat conversations.
June 4, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
June 2, 2020
Quickie is a video series where everyone featured gets only one minute to rant, review or do absolutely anything.
May 14, 2020
Isolation Diary is a Zikoko series that showcases what isolation is like for one young Nigerian working from home due to the Coronavirus pandemic.
March 12, 2020
Life is already hard. Deciding where to eat and get the best lifestyle experiences, isn't something you should stress about. Let VRSUS do that for you.

Z! Stacks

Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in:

Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.
X