We don’t care if you enjoy sex or not. The damage caused by that act is enough and it is time for the government to abolish sex in Nigeria. Here are 11 good reasons why this must happen ASAP.
1. Sex brings pregnancy.
Be honest with yourself, do you want pregnancy at this time?
2. Pregnancy brings babies, and babies steal your peace of mind.
And then the child grows up to hate you, despite everything you did for them. Is this how you want your life to go?
3. Sex makes you confused. You start wondering if it’s love you are feeling.
And like this, they will take you for an idiot. You will begin to condone nonsense in the name of love. We don’t want that for you, so we all need to come together to beg the government to ban this act.
4. Sex is too sweet.
And we all know doctors and dentists don’t recommend things that are too sweet. So, it’s best to choose health over hot fok.
5. Sex is messy and sweaty.
Imagine bathing and smelling nice, only to be rough handled by someone and getting their saliva in your mouth and their sweat all over your body? Imagine getting your hair scattered, and your legs spread apart like a television’s antenna? God forbid abeg. We need to ban such a dirty act.
6. Let’s be honest, sex is unproductive use of our time.
Time you should be using to harvest yam and better your lives or advancing in your career, you are using it to bend over or get bent over while someone is grabbi— Oh no, this act deserves to be abolished.
7. All the heat from hot fok is causing global warming.
Global warming is a serious environmental crisis. Why must you choose to damage your environment because of hot fok? Do you not care about survival?
8. Sex is the leading cause of cheating in Nigeria.
Yes. Yes. Yes. The earlier we abolish sex, the longer relationships and marriages last.
9. Our population is already plenty enough.
We need a moratorium on sex until things normalise. We cannot afford to lapse into overpopulation.
10. Sex makes people scream “Jesus” and “Oh my God”
First of all, do you nasty sinners not fear anything? What if your noise encourages our creator to hasten His second coming?
11. Buhari was angry that all we use Twitter for is sex, so he banned it.
Abolish sex today so we can get Twitter back today.
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