What Should You Do When Buhari Visits Your City?

March 22, 2022

If your city’s name is not London, then it’s not every day that it’s blessed with the presence of travel blogger, President Buhari. The United Kingdom has seen his gap-toothed smile more times than Lai Mohammed has spoken the truth.

But the president will make a local stop in Lagos State on Tuesday, March 22nd 2022 on a work visit.

What’s he looking for?

President Buhari is in Lagos State for four things, and none of them is about the heat cooking the city.

The high point of his visit is the commissioning of a new international terminal at the Murtala Muhammed International Airport. The last terminal was commissioned in 1979.

That’s 43 years if you were counting

The new terminal is expected to process over a dozen million passengers annually and decongest the operations of the old terminal. But will it stop airport officials from still harassing you to drop something for the boys? We can’t say at this time.

Buhari’s second order of business is to commission the Dangote Fertiliser Plant in Lekki. He’ll also do inspection tours of the Lekki Deep Sea Port and Dangote Refinery. 

Unfortunately, Chief Inspector Babatunde Fashola won’t be there to find cameras

How should Lagosians react?

Buhari leaving Abuja for anywhere inside Nigeria is a big deal, because you know he actually wants to be in London instead. But when he decides to step into your city, what are your options?

Be a human red carpet 

What you should do when Buhari visits your city

If you’re a Buharist, the president’s visit to your city is easily the best thing to happen to you that week. Or month, if you don’t have a lot going for you. A presidential visit presents the opportunity to activate that Sai Baba devotion and show that you’re his Number 1 fan. Rolling out that red carpet for him is so outdated; you can become the carpet yourself.

Take a sick day off work

If you’re a Buhari hater, the president’s visit to your city will likely make you feel sick. Take a day off and tell your employer that your pet goat died or something and working is not on your list of priorities that day.

ALSO READ: Why Is Buhari Using Nigeria’s $1 million to Do Giveaway for Afghanistan?

Remind him of youth unemployment

You also want to take a sick day off work, but you don’t have any work because you’re one of the 22.3 million Nigerians who are unemployed. You can join Buhari’s welcome party and display a placard to remind him that he’s not doing his job well. He may spot you as his convoy drives past, or he may be too busy not caring.

What you should do when Buhari visits your city

Stay at home

For a place like Lagos, a presidential visit is also a test from God or the Devil — it’s hard to tell. Roads are blocked, there’s a lot of vehicular diversions and you’re stuck in traffic sweating like a Christmas goat. Your recourse is to stay home and pray the president leaves as quickly as possible. Going outside for anything that needs four wheels may lead to “Had I known.”

What you should do when Buhari visits your city

Flee the city

The thought of Buhari drawing the same oxygen in the same city as you is not one you even want to entertain. Run.

What you should do when Buhari visits your city

ALSO READ: How Buhari Has Freed 1,629 “Repentant” Boko Haram Members

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