Hello, Nigerian Constitution? We Have Some Amendments To Suggest

February 20, 2020

The Nigerian Constitution is the most important book in Nigeria. It is the source of all of our laws, and the highest law if any issues come up regarding the lawfulness of a subject.

Which is why, unless you’re an eager-to-please law student/lawyer, you probably have no idea what this book looks like. Who law actually epp in Nigeria?

But since you have a little understanding of the Constitution, it’s easy to see why amendments need to be made every now and again to capture important changes in the country.

Because of that, we jumped and passed some people that don’t really care about us (our lawmakers), to speak directly to the Constitution — man to book.

Here are some amendments to the Nigerian Constitution we think would be great in improving matters of national importance/security:

Can the amended Nigerian Constitution state how many pieces of suya you’re allowed to take when your friend leaves the newspaper open?

We’re thinking start with 5 if it’s ₦ 200 suya and work our way up from there.

The equitable way to deal with Yoruba demons without going to prison deserves a schedule or two in the Nigerian Constitution. Who’s with me?

Might also need to take this matter to the Criminal Code at this point.

An amendment to the 7 PM official time for turning generators on in Nigerian homes.

Nigerian constitution

A lot of us have Ultimate Love to watch after work closes at 5 you know.

If the Nigerian Constitution could get a paragraph or two mandating that Nigerian artists stop the use of ‘baka’ to rhyme with ‘Amaka’ in their lyrics.

Nigerian Constitution

It’s an emergency at this point.

We need a maximum number of stories to be posted on Instagram while attending a concert ASAPLY, Constitution.

Nigerian constitution

Five is the magic number, in case anyone was wondering.

We humbly appeal that the Nigerian Constitution intervene in getting Nigerian DJs to stop playing ‘All of me’ at weddings.

Nigerian Constitution

The force that saved us from Tosin Martins’ ‘Olo mi’ will save us from John Legend.

Nigerian Constitution please, we’re calling on you! A whole section banning any more talk on who should cook on Nigerian Twitter.

Nigerian Constitution

We’re going to need 15 sub-sections listing out punishments for those who disobey. Please @the Criminal Code when you’re through.

Can an amendment be made in the Nigerian Constitution mandating government officials to use only public transportation?

Nigerian Constitution

Let them trek, let them see how great danfos are. Absolutely no private jets. Make it happen sis.

If the Nigerian Constitution would kindly find a way to remove the words ‘strongly criticise’ from every Nigerian politician’s mouth.

Especially where they do very little to help make sure the criticised issue isn’t repeated.

But seriously, wouldn’t it be great if the Nigerian Constitution had like a three-strike rule for political leaders?

Nigerian Constitution

Like, say if you don’t make substantial progress towards 25% of your campaign policies within 200 days in office, the length of your tenure gets reduced by 25% and so on. It kind of makes sense. You sef think am.

Nigerian Constitution

What would you like to have amended in the Nigerian Constitution?

Boyin Plumptre

Join The Conversation

Bring a friend.

You'll like this

October 30, 2020

Yesterday, a series of videos surfaced online of how lawmakers in the Lagos State House of Assembly tore into Nigerian youths. From claims ranging from the fact that many Nigerian youths are into “hard drugs”, to claims of how “social media influencers” over-exaggerated the #LekkiMassacre, the lawmakers poured out their hearts at the legislative sitting […]

Nigerian police can arrest you
November 15, 2020

“Park! You’re guilty of reckless carriage of a heavy load condensed as two trunks right in between your back and your legs, something like an ukwu!” Okay, the Nigerian police shouldn’t arrest you for that. But these are 5 things that can actually land you in court: 1. Witchcraft E shock you? You didn’t know […]

Obasanjo Oputa panel
October 27, 2020

On October 19, 2020, the Lagos State Government set up the Lagos Judicial Panel of Inquiry and Restitution for victims of police brutality in Lagos state. But, judicial panels are not new in Nigeria. In fact, about 20 years ago, we also had a popular Oputa panel. Read: #EndSARS: The Lagos Judicial Panel of Inquiry […]

Watch

Now on Zikoko

January 15, 2021

If you watch football regularly, you’ll enjoy seeing people humiliate their opponents by dribbling them just to hear the crowd go wild. If you play football, you’re either the one who dribbles people or the one who gets dribbled. If you’re the one who gets dribbled, you’ll be able to relate to this. And you […]

January 15, 2021

Annual remittances to Nigeria are estimated to be approximately $24bn, accounting for 6% of GDP, according to research by PwC. The importance of these overseas transfers has been amplified by the global pandemic and economic downturn. In response to the Central Bank of Nigeria’s Directive on international money transfers, WorldRemit was the first cross-border payments […]

January 15, 2021

Dear men, you never know what to do after you send a woman pictures? Well, we are here to help. 1) Send us money Looking at your beautiful pictures has caused us eye pains because your beauty is blinding. You have to pay for eye treatments. 2) Buy us a new wig Your beauty just […]

Recommended Quizzes

October 29, 2019

We are going to be attempting to guess when you’ll marry based on your favourite Nigerian foods. What does your fave swallow have to do with when you’ll tie the knot? Please, don’t ask complicated questions. This quiz is rigorous and accurate (don’t quote us), so just take it already. QUIZ: Why Do You Have […]

November 20, 2019

Last month, we thoughtfully made a quiz telling you guys exactly when you’ll marry, but some of you claimed that your spouse was nowhere to be found. Well, now we’ve created one that’ll tell you exactly who you’ll be dragging down that aisle. Take and start planning that wedding: 11 Quizzes For Nigerians Who Are […]

April 3, 2020

While the rest of the world loves to treat our continent like a country, there are actually 54 African countries. So, in a bid to test your knowledge (and educate you), we’ve created a quiz to see how many of their capitals you can correctly name. Go ahead:

November 19, 2019

Regardless of what society has tried to tell us, enjoying sex is not something to be ashamed of. So, in a bid to celebrate our generation’s sexual agency, we’ve created a quiz that will accurately (again, keep your complaints to yourself) infer how many people you’ve spelt with. Try it out: 11 Quizzes For The […]

November 15, 2019

There are two types of people in Nigeria right now: those who are proud Marlians, and those who are still in denial about stanning the divisive star. So, for those who proudly wear the Marlian tag, we made a quiz to test how well you really know Naira Marley. If you get more than 6 […]

More from Citizen

January 13, 2021

On Tuesday, January 12, 2021, the Ministry of Finance, Budget, and National Planning presented the approved 2021 budget to the public via a virtual conference call. If you missed it, here are a few things we think you will be interested in.  1. How will Nigeria finance the budget deficit? Finance Minister Zainab Ahmed said […]

January 1, 2021

Abroad Life has a special place in my heart. I’m always super happy to speak to people about their lives and how living abroad has changed the way they view things. It’s also really great to hear people’s stories and see foreigners through the eyes of Nigerians. Today, I’m going to be sharing the most […]

December 28, 2020

On December 20, a video of Mrs Deborah Okezie, mother to Don Davis, an 11-year-old JSS1 student of Deeper Life High School, Uyo, was sexually molested and starved at school surfaced on the internet. In the video, Mrs Okezie lamented about her son’s status. “They [senior students] will remove his boxer and push their legs and hands into his anus,” she said. “Look at a child I sent to school,” she adds, “he came back with a broken anus.”

December 25, 2020

Today’s subject on Abroad Life talks about how she moved from Kaduna to Abeokuta to Lagos then Budapest while searching for a better quality of life. She doesn’t think Hungary is much better than Nigeria, but she’s satisfied there. Let’s start with Nigeria. Where did you grow up? I grew up in Abeokuta state. I’m […]

Ex-Swift Recovery
December 17, 2020

On August 20th, 2019, the Federal Government of Nigeria introduced “Operation Ex-Swift Response”. The goal of the operation was to reduce insecurity through a complete closure of Nigeria’s land borders. In the operation, the Nigerian Customs Service (NCS), the Nigerian Immigration Service (NIS), the Armed Forces of Nigeria (AFN) the Nigerian Police Force (NPF), and […]

December 11, 2020

It is a common saying that art imitates life, but sometimes it goes beyond that. Through different civil right movements in history, music has played a vital role in serving as an ever potent channel of activism, and an alternative means of documentation.  Over the past few months, the entire globe witnessed the #EndSARS protests […]

December 11, 2020

Today’s subject on Abroad Life talks about navigating relationships as a young Nigerian man in a new environment: Canada. He talks about how he found love, but lost it because of religious differences.  How long have you been in Canada for? I’ve been in Canada for over four years. I came here in September 2016 […]

Watch

Trending Videos

Zikoko Originals

December 14, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
November 2, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
October 26, 2020
A collection of videos documenting some of the events of the EndSARS protests.
June 22, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
June 22, 2020
Hacked is an interesting new series by Zikoko made up of fictional but hilarious chat conversations.
June 4, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
June 2, 2020
Quickie is a video series where everyone featured gets only one minute to rant, review or do absolutely anything.
May 14, 2020
Isolation Diary is a Zikoko series that showcases what isolation is like for one young Nigerian working from home due to the Coronavirus pandemic.
March 12, 2020
Life is already hard. Deciding where to eat and get the best lifestyle experiences, isn't something you should stress about. Let VRSUS do that for you.

Z! Stacks

Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in:

Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.
X