8 Ways To Know You’re Suffering From Long-Throat

December 16, 2020

It is one thing to like food, it is another thing to have a serious case of long-throat. If these 8 signs are manifesting in your life, my brother my sister, you are suffering from long-throat. Seek help ASAP.

1. You must not see any food picture online, you are already salivating.

Stir-fry spaghetti, grilled turkey, burger, or anything, your throat is already pulsing with desire. We pity you.

2. Anytime you have 1k in your account, the next thing you think of is food.

You don’t even think of how to better your life with that 1k. First thing is shawarma or a plate of food. Tueh.

3. You have the phone number of more than 5 food vendors.

If it’s sure for you, show us your phone book let us see.

4. You can’t count the number of restaurants you have eaten at.

How do you hope to sustain a family this way? Is this how you want to continue living?

5. If you visit someone’s house and they offer you food, you’ll collect it.

They kuku taught you, but it’s you that refused to obey your parents. Don’t you wonder why people no longer invite you to their house?

6. You are always trying out new food.

“I’m a foodie.” Haq. Sharap there my fren!

7. Your love language is food.

We been knew oh. One slice of cake, and they have won your heart. Femi, is that all you’re worth?

8. Each time you attend a party, you always want a second helping.

Why else do you think they didn’t invite you to that wedding? They know you are a consuming fire.

Change your ways!


Kunle Ologunro

Join The Conversation

Bring a friend.

You'll like this

Watch

Now on Zikoko

black woman with afro smiling
September 20, 2021

Hair lice are tiny, wingless insects that live in the hair of humans. They feed on tiny amounts of blood they get from the scalp. They spread easily from comb to comb. It is especially rampant among kids.  It’s not easy to get rid of hair lice but here are a few tips that have […]

Recommended Quizzes

October 30, 2019

2010 was a game-changing one for Nollywood, with our movies making serious cash and getting international acclaim. So, which of these hits released between 2010 and 2019 — from the pace-setting The Wedding Party to the divisive Trip To Jamaica — best suits your personality? Well, that’s what this quiz is here to answer:

March 24, 2020

While we know that a lot of the best Nigerian artists deservedly have fans across generations, that won’t stop us from attempting to guess how old you are based on your taste in Nigerian music. So, take this quiz to see if we got it right:

November 11, 2019

Everyone has something to say about what kind of person they are. But how well do we truthfully evaluate these things? Not that much, I can assure you. The average person is always lying to themselves to make sure they look good. But you know what and who doesn’t lie? Zikoko quizzes that’s what. Take […]

November 12, 2019

Are you a single pringle, stuck in a complicated situationship or happily married to the love of your life? This quiz is here to guess your current relationship status, and as you know, Zikoko quizzes are incredibly accurate (don’t quote us). So, give a shot:

More from Chopist

August 27, 2021

Pepper Soup is a watery dish made in different parts of the world with different techniques and ingredients. Countries and cultures around the world have their different version of it. Peppersoup has a lot of nutritional and health benefits. Nigerian pepper soup comes in different forms. There is the goat meat pepper soup, fish pepper […]

August 27, 2021

It’s safe to say that the one thing all Africans can agree on is that Jollof rice reigns supreme over all foods. This is not to say that other foods are terrible. They’re great. But you see Jollof ehn, it does things to the body. Jollof is the food of the gods. It’s almost perfect. […]

Watch

Trending Videos

Zikoko Originals

December 14, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
November 2, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
October 26, 2020
A collection of videos documenting some of the events of the EndSARS protests.
June 22, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
June 22, 2020
Hacked is an interesting new series by Zikoko made up of fictional but hilarious chat conversations.
June 4, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
June 2, 2020
Quickie is a video series where everyone featured gets only one minute to rant, review or do absolutely anything.
May 14, 2020
Isolation Diary is a Zikoko series that showcases what isolation is like for one young Nigerian working from home due to the Coronavirus pandemic.
March 12, 2020
Life is already hard. Deciding where to eat and get the best lifestyle experiences, isn't something you should stress about. Let VRSUS do that for you.

Z! Stacks

Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in:

Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.
X