Good day Mr. Chairman, ladies and gentlemen, accurate timekeeper and my co-debaters (we actually pronounced it codebators sef). My name is [insert your name] and I am here to support the motion which says…
1. Farmers are better than teachers.
How you feel when you hit them with your ‘solid’ points: Can a teacher teach without food? Teachers have to be taught, farmers are not taught. Books are made from trees.
2. Doctors are better than lawyers.
To think that you actually stepped up to debate this topic. But look at you forming woke now. Leemao.
3. Boys are better than girls.
There were girls who actually went up to support this motion. Talk about betraying your own kind, selling them for clout. We don’t blame you sha. You didn’t know what you were doing.
4. Military rule is better than democratic rule.
I debated this topic o. I even won for the team and the losing team almost beat me up for defeating them. Ah, look at us, a bunch of young retards.
5. Fathers are better than mothers.
“Why? Dear ladies and gentlemen, I think you will agree with me that fathers are the breadwinners. Without a father in the home, the home is like a body without the head. Such a home cannot survive.” And then the whole hall claps, because Obalende Shakespeare has dropped bars.
With these few points of mine, I hope I have been able to convince you and not confuse you that…
A clown, that’s what you are.