You need to end your black tax before it ends you and your pocket. Take this quiz and we’ll give you a way out of it.
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This is your chance to make a humble brag about how loaded you are. If you can relate to at least eight things on this quiz, you’re definitely rich.
Questions
This is a question
Pick all the things you can relate to:
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We’ll dash you (fake) $1m on this quiz. Spend it and we’ll suggest a career that fits you.
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The fastest way to get rich is to be born rich. But if you missed that bus, you can just marry rich and your problems would be solved. We have the cheat code to do just that, and we’ll give it to you for free.
Snatch someone’s rich spouse
Who has time to start looking for a rich spouse all over the place, when you can just find a rich couple, enter their relationship and create small space for yourself?
Marry your glucose guardian
How to actually make them go from glucose guardian to a spouse? That’s up to you to figure out. You can trap them with food or kayan mata, or even just put a ring on their finger and force them to sign a few papers.
Join a political party
You have our word on finding “rich” people there. But a spouse? You’re on your own in that aspect.
Gatecrash a classy wedding
What better way to meet your rich spouse than at a gathering of already-rich people celebrating marriage? You may end up choosing a Yoruba demon, but it’s worth the risk.
RELATED: All The Places You Can Find A Nigerian Sugar Daddy
Hang around the Canadian embassy
In this life, you just have to be strategic. That’s why hanging around the Canadian embassy is the exact thing you should be doing if you want a rich spouse. When you add the possibility of japa, there’s no reason why you shouldn’t pursue them.
Slide into a rich person’s DM
You should only do this after you’ve liked all their pictures so they can notice you. They’ll probably follow back. Once they do, the floor is set.
Propose to an Akara seller
We’ve said it before, but we’ll say it again, akara is the new tech. Profess your love to the next akara seller that catches your eye.
ALSO READ: 13 Places to Meet a Rich Bobo in Lagos
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We’ll tell you if you’re broke or crazy rich based on the number of these designer brands you own.
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Does the stink of poverty follow you about or do you smell like a million bucks?
Take this quiz to find out.
QUIZ: How Rich Is Your Soulmate?
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When a young Nigerian man has just come into money, he is easy to know. You have to look out for the signs so you can know how to make your move. Here is a list of eleven signs you should watch out for. Don’t say Zikoko did not do anything for you.
1. He’s starting to grow a potbelly.
The potbelly of a young Nigerian man who has just come into money is certainly not as big as this. It’s a small, blossoming thing, just to show that he has started eating a little too well and does not really have time for the gym because he is too busy counting his new money. Look around, ladies and gentlemen, these men are everywhere.
2. He wears Sauvage by Dior or Club De Nuit Intense.
This is the signature scent. You better get familiar with it. It is the smell of money.
3. He visits Unilag In the evening.
We are not going to speak much on this. But if you know, you know.
4. He has white native, both up and down and Agbada.
You will probably call him a demon, but he knows he is an angel and doesn’t want you to stain his white.
White wey don stain.5. With Man purse
This is a necessary piece.
6. He’s always tweeting about how his parents now ask him for advice.
It’s because he has money, my dears. Who sabi the poor pikin?
7. He says things like “I will marry this woman.”
He’s an intentional man, please. No time for back and forth, he is a talk-and-do.
8. He cheats only once a week
Because he’s busy making money the rest of the week. Can’t fumble the bag because of mekwe.
9. He either drives a Corolla or a Lexus or he’s driving a Toyota and aiming for Lexus.
By their cars, you shall know them. Better watch out so you can catch the latest fresh fish.
10. He’s working Canadian PR.
What’s the point of being a rich young man who has just come into money, if not to japa? #OperationCanda #JapaSZN
11. He doesn’t have time for foreplay
He’s too busy trying to get back to work. Can’t be spending time caressing places that won’t yield cash. If anyone says we are lying, let them come out and deny it.
[donation]
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You’d have to either be crazy rich or have a sharp colour memory to ace this quiz.
Good luck!
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How much do you have in your account? Let’s expose you:
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If you have money, then you’ll be listening to songs about money. How well do you know their lyrics?
Take the quiz:
