1. God, let my enemies not recognize me like Cynthia Morgan.
2. God, add colour to my life like Yemi Alade’s wardrobe.
3. God, relax the exchange rate like Korede Bello’s hair.
4. God, airbrush my problems like Rita Dominic’s picture.
5. God, let my future be as bright as Toke Makinwa’s new skin.
6. God, let my account balance glow up like Mo’ Cheddah.
7. God, take me from razz to royalty like Uncle Olamide.
8. God, turn my ratchet to riches like Mummy Omotola.
9. God, add plenty flesh to my testimony like Skales.
10. God, upgrade my career like Seyi Shay’s style.
11. God, give me a reason to smile like Oga Davido.
12. God, turn my night to day like Tonto Dikeh’s complexion.
This Twitter account @SeeMeSeeNigeria, compiles the most interesting facts in Nigerian history. We compiled these awesome pictures from Nigeria’s past that we weren’t taught in school. Thank us later for this lesson in history.
1. The oldest record of Efik language in written form.
The big idea for the MAGGI 50th anniversary campaign is: Let’s Celebrate. We intend to do this primarily by sending gift boxes containing specially curated ingredients and gifts to women influencers pan Nigeria & beyond for trusting MAGGI in the past years, and in the future ahead. Click the link below to learn more.
1. How all the class efikos sit in front during speech and prize giving day:
Let’s do this.
2. Those unbothered students that only came for free drinks and food:
Where is the meatpie, biko?
3. You, when just one student is collecting all the gifts for your set:
Who is this one?
4. How the students that get called out for best in Maths and English walk out:
WINNING!
5. All your classmates, when the class olodo’s name gets called:
Say what?
6. How your mother looks at you when it’s almost over and they still haven’t called your name:
See your life.
7. When your father comes with all his friends and you haven’t won anything.
Hay God!
8. When your friend that always stabs class with you gets called out and you’re still empty-handed.
WOW! So it’s like that?
9. When your mates are getting called out for ‘best in Physics’ and you hear your name for ‘best in Yoruba’.
To use and do what?
10. When the efikos open their prizes in front of you and you’re just seeing water bottles.
See nonsense.
11. You, when the class oversabi’s name doesn’t get called out.
OUCH!
12. How you leave the speech and prize giving day empty-handed:
It can pain.
1. You, devising new tactics to catch your prey.
Have to be prepared.
2. When you finally meet a light-skinned Igbo babe that is stronger than you.
This one has passed me.
3. When your girlfriend catches you in bed with her sister so you vex till she apologizes for coming home too early.
Next time call before you come home.
4. When you see your girlfriend you’ve cheated on 70 times shaking her male co-worker’s hand.
These women ain’t loyal.
5. When your girlfriend is bringing up marriage after just 7 years, so you dump her.
Impatient woman.
6. When you see your ex being happy and fulfilled without you in her life.
See me see trouble.
7. When your girlfriend accuses you of cheating but you’ve been faithful for 2 whole days.
With all my effort?
8. When you realize you have finally fallen in love.
Hay God!
9. When you see a babe you like and she is telling you she is married like that one is your business.
Is that what I asked you?
10. How you use N200 credit to call the 27 women in your life:
As a professional.
11. You, trying to deceive all your side chicks that your heart belongs to them.
Only you baby.
12. When you hear one of your 26 side chicks is leaving you to get married.
The pain.
1. The common entrance book of life:
Ugo C. Ugo for the win.
2. When your school forces everyone to do mock exams to prepare.
Don’t add to my stress.
3. When your parents force you to attend one local common entrance lesson:
What is all this?
4. When you ask your parents for a new math set and they start asking you JAMB questions.
“What about the one we bought for you 4 years ago?”
5. How you look at Primary 4 students that want to follow you and do common entrance too:
Wait your turn biko.
6. You, jacking the Friday before your common entrance like:
Secondary school is my portion.
7. How you see the maths and quantitative common entrance questions:
Wetin be dis?
8. You, waking up on the Saturday of common entrance like:
The day has arrived.
9. You, looking for your friends when you get to your common entrance centre:
Where are my people?
10. How you stroll into your centre with 12 extra pencils and 10 biros:
My body is ready.
11. When you see them repeat questions you crammed in your Ugo C. Ugo.
WINNING!
12. You, when the invigilator starts dictating answers for some of the students.
Ah! Is it like that?
13. You, waiting for your parents to come and pick you from the centre when it’s over:
I want to go oh.
14. When your result finally comes out and you passed the cut-off mark.
YES LORD!
15. Your face, when you remember you still have interviews to do:
Hay God! It’s not over.
One of the cabin crew members of Etihad Airways, Alexander George, happened to be in Lagos for a few days in August and he had interesting things to say.
In a post on his now private Instagram page, he stated that he was in Lagos, an interesting destination that’s so dangerous, they can’t leave their hotel.
Really?
Nigerians angrily went into his Instagram page to drag him for making that kind of statement.
But is this type of ignorance really bliss?
Some Nigerians are already planning to boycott Etihad Airways because of the statement their staff made.
Getting escorted doesn’t always spell danger!
Maybe the people at Etihad need to give their staff some home training.
Instead of him to jejely stay in his hotel and face front, he’s doing unnecessary amebo.
It’s not like flight attendants can roam about a country during work, it’s not a vacation abeg!
Every country in the world has locations that are regarded as dangerous spots.
The fact that a country has dangerous spots doesn’t necessarily make the entire country unsafe. We’re in 2016, people need to stop being ignorant abeg!
That said, Nigerians need to acknowledge the problems going on in the country rather than being defensive whenever someone from outside points them out.
Usain Bolt won his 7th Olympic Gold in Rio, and he did it smiling! The 29-year-old Jamaican won the 100m Gold in Beijing ’08, and London’12, and has secured his title as the fastest man on Earth. We got the best internet reactions for you, you’re very welcome!
Look at this greatness. Soak it in. Now you understand why Usain Bolt broke the internet.
The big idea for the MAGGI 50th anniversary campaign is: Let’s Celebrate. We intend to do this primarily by sending gift boxes containing specially curated ingredients and gifts to women influencers pan Nigeria & beyond for trusting MAGGI in the past years, and in the future ahead. Click the link below to learn more.
You scrolling through blogs and magazines for inspiration
This is serious business!
When you see the prices of the things you like
Ahn ahn!
When you check your budget and compare it to the cost of things you like
One day, one trouble!
Trying to find affordable things in Lagos
So to find skirt and blouse is now a problem?
You getting ready to enter Balogun market to shop
It’s not just shopping, it’s a battle.
A rare image of a popular vendor’s stall in Balogun
See crowd oh hayyy!
When you try to replicate autumn/winter looks in Lagos
Ah mo ti sé mistake.
Your tailor when you start explaining what you want
Carry your wahala and go please!
When you tell people you are passionate about fashion
Is it not ordinary clothes?
When your parents think your love of fashion means you want to become a tailor
You want to kill us abi?
When you see people trying to copy your swag
Trendsetter of life!
But then they claim they came up with the idea
THIEF THIEF!
When you find an outfit you’ve been looking for, for months
I feel happy! I feel grateful! I feel fulfilled!
When someone claims you have too many clothes
Get out of here please!
When people just want you to “dash” them clothes
It’s a no from me please and thank you!
Despite being let down severally by the Nigerian Government, especially in the areas of funding, planning and general support, we still believe in the abilities of the athletes representing us. Here are the top stars we think will win big in Rio.
1. Dream Team VI member, Oghenekaro Etebo.
Etebo made us super proud when he scored 4 out of 5 goals in our U-23 game against Japan.
2. Olympic and World Championship medalist, Blessing Okagbare.
Okagbare will represent us in both track events and long jump.
3. Champion tennis player, Aruna Qadri.
Quadri has set a record as the first African to make it to the Table Tennis Quarter Finals at the Olympics.
4. Odunayo Adekuoroye, freestyle wrestling champion.
She won a gold medal at the 2014 Commonwealth Games, and a bronze at the 2015 World Wrestling Championships.
Shane plays center position for FC Barcelona Lassa, and is a great addition to the Nigerian team for the Men’s Tournament at the Olympics.
6. Track and field athlete, Margaret Bamgbose.
Bamgbose was the lead for Team Nigeria’s relay race at the World Indoor Championships in Portland this year, and will represent Nigeria in the 400m Women’s Race.
7. American-born athlete, Miles Ukaoma.
He competed in the 2015 World Championships in Beijing and will represent Nigerian in the 400m Men’s Hurdle.
8. Champion sprinter, Gloria Asunmu.
Asunmu represented Nigeria in the 2014 IAAF relays, 2015 World Championships in Beijing and the 2016 African Championships in South Africa. She will represent Nigeria in the Women’s 100m and 4 by 100m relay race.
9. U-23 footballer, Umar Sadiq.
Sadiq who is also a forward for football club A.S Roma, scored Nigeria’s first goal in the game against Japan, and we look forward to all the amazing things this 19-year-old will do in Rio.
10. John Mikel Obi, professional footballer.
Mikel is a regular on the Nigerian national football team, and also a mid-fielder for English football club Chelsea. He is the captain of the Dream Team VI, and so far has led the team to win against Sweden and Japan.
