After refusing to accept his sexuality in Nigeria, today’s subject on Abroad Life moved to the US in 2015. He talks about how his relationship with God, his parents and church members made him realise that he had to accept his sexuality. When did you decide that you were going to move to the US? […]
Outing a queer person without their consent especially in a country like Nigeria is one of the worst things you could do to a queer person. To the four people we spoke to in this story, they know too well that it is like to feel the fear of being outed before you feel ready […]
Today’s subject on Abroad Life is a 21-year-old woman who discovered she is pansexual after moving to the US. She talks about leaving Nigeria, leaving religion and the journey to discovering and accepting her sexuality. What was growing up in Nigeria like for you? I grew up with my parents and three brothers. There isn’t […]
This article shares stories of women who have experienced both sides of love and relationships and have chosen what makes them feel the happiest . These women share their stories of leaving heterosexual relationships to date women. Here are their stories: Mimi I always dated and was sexually active with both men and women at […]
Sometimes, when you finally accept your sexuality as a queer Nigerian, you may not know what to do. So, these six queer Nigerians give advice to newer queer people. Promise You don’t have to label yourself. Be patient with yourself, love yourself and know that whatever you are, you deserve love and acceptance. Doyin You […]
Pride month is gay Christmas that lasts longer than regular Christmas. This pride, here are few tips on how to be a better friend and ally to your queer friend. 1. Send them money Times are tuff, sapa left and right. What better way to support your queer friend? Empty your bank account dear, especially […]
What’s dating a man like when you are also dating women? In this article, nine Nigerian women talk about dating men vs dating women. Ini, 31 The first thing I noticed when I started dating women was how quickly we moved from talking stage to saying I love you. With women, it’s easier to put […]
Paul*, 23, and Keside*, 32, have been dating for four years. In today’s episode of Love Life, they talk about meeting online, transitioning to a long-distance relationship and eventually deciding to open up their relationship. What’s your earliest memory of each other? Paul: We met on Grindr in 2017. I remember I was on a […]
Sex Life is an anonymous Zikoko weekly series that explores the pleasures, frustrations and excitement of sex in the lives of Nigerians. The subject of today’s Sex Life is a 28-year-old gay man who recently discovered he is a side — a gay man who isn’t interested in penetrative sex. He talks about how this affects […]
As told to Mariam I put a call out for women to tell me the things that affect their mental health most. In Ada’s* message, she said her parents found out she is queer. I was curious about how that played out and I asked more questions. Here’s what she told me: I am the […]
Abeni*, 22, and Ifunanya*, 26, met on Twitter and dated for six months. Today on Love Life, they talk about their relationship and why it ended abruptly even though it was the best one they had both been in. What is your earliest memory of each other? Ifunanya: One day, I was scrolling on Twitter […]
Today’s Man Like is Bolu Okupe, a 27-year old bodybuilder and model living in Paris. He talks about repressing his sexuality until he was in his 20s, having to assert his masculinity and how he deals with internet trolls. When did it first hit you that you were a man? I don’t think there was […]
As told to Mariam In March, Kachi* messaged me to say she had a story for me about her relationship with her mum. We had a conversation and here’s what she told me: The relationship I have with my mum is the kind of relationship people have with their sisters. Maybe it is because I […]
Lesbian Visibility week started on April 26th. It is a week set aside to celebrate lesbians around the world. Being a lesbian in Nigeria sometimes involves listening to people volunteering their assumptions about lesbians. In this article, I asked 7 Nigerian lesbians the funniest misconception of lesbians they’ve heard. Here’s what they had to say: […]
There are not many feelings in the world that match the realization of ones queerness. These six Nigerian women share when they knew they were queer. Anita, 24 I went to one of those private catholic girls secondary schools in Abuja. In JS 1, during our visiting day, some boys came from the neighbouring “brother” […]
Jennifer, 28 and Emem, 26, have been dating for eight months. In today’s episode of Love Life, they talk about navigating a lesbian relationship in Nigeria and learning to work together as business partners. What’s your earliest memory of each other? Jennifer: I was walking back from the gate after seeing my friend off. I […]
Being queer opens you up to many forms of abuse or intrusion into your personal life. For many queer people, one of the more irritating things that happen when you are queer and straight people know that, is the way they ask or say very vulgar and uncomfortable questions and statements. Today, we asked six […]
Bibi, 33, and Kelly, 27, have been dating for about four years. In today’s episode of Love Life, they talk about how they met online and transitioned from a long-distance relationship to a live-in couple. What’s your earliest memory of each other? Kelly: I think mine is the first time we had drinks at a […]
Think about all the stories about women in the media. Most of the stories follow the same trail: women should be one thing and when they fail, they are punished for it. Uyai grew among women who challenged these stories, and after working on a movie set at 19, she was eager to tell different […]
8 Nigerians share their horrible experiences getting punished or expelled while in school.
Farida*, 27, and Favour*, 28, went from cheating on their ex-partners with each other to eventually falling in love.
Frank*, 27, and Gabriel*, 30, have been together for five years. For today’s Love Life, they talk about navigating an open relationship, dealing with homophobia and their future plans. What is your earliest memory of each other? Frank: LMAO. I remember he introduced me to the pop band, London Grammar. We first met on the […]
The subject of today’s Sex Life is a 32-year old pansexual trans man who grew up in Nigeria then relocated to the US.
As told to Mariam During my first week at Zikoko, I wanted to write an article on how body dysmorphia affects women. I made a call for women to share their stories with me and Fisayo* messaged me. I eventually found that a similar article had been written but the conversation I had with them […]
The experiences of queer people any and everywhere are far from monolithic. Oppression takes many forms and, sometimes, the fact that you can or cannot pass as a member of a non-marginalised community is what determines how much or what type of oppression/marginalisation gets thrown your way. Passing, in the simplest terms, is the ability […]
What is it like loving women as a woman? Seven African women tell us about the experience. Hadiza, 20, Nigerian I expected it to be easier. I expected dating women to make me feel more safe and less insecure. The safety part is true, but the easy part is not. Women are challenging. Dating them […]
We spoke to a few straight Nigerian men who have slept with men or favours.
Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in: