At the core, men are simple creatures. No matter how different we look, speak or act, we all have a ton of similar traits and things we do when nobody else is watching. I might get kicked out of the homies group chat for revealing these secrets, but these are the things that every man has done (or constantly does) at some point in their life.

1. Check his browser history. He has googled what the average penis size is.

And he has probably googled it multiple times. Who knows? The average size might have reduced since last week.

2. At some point, every guy has thought they lost one of their testicles, panicked, and then found it again.

Those three seconds before finding it are the scariest three seconds of a man’s life.

3. If someone leaves a poop stain in the toilet, guys will aim for it while peeing to try and clean it off.

And people say men don’t do domestic chores.

4. When back home from shopping, guys ALWAYS try to take everything inside in one trip.

Anything more than one trip is slavery. We need to get back to what we were doing.

5. Every guy has a preference for which side they keep their penis. (Left is best.)

No arguments here, please.

6. Every guy taps his pockets to ensure his phone, keys and wallet are there before they leave a place.

This is why we never forget anything.

7. When they were younger, they used to tuck their penises behind their legs and pretend to be women.

Don’t lie o. You did this.


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