It’s really impossible not to tell when a Nigerian woman is sending you signals.
Seriously. If a Nigerian woman likes you ehn, she can be as obvious and shameless as Oga Dino Melaye showing off his musical skills.
“A je kun iya ni…” Okay, you get the point sha.
Oya sit down and take notes.
When a Nigerian woman is sending you signals, you should see all or some of these things:
1. When you’re talking about sports and she’s looking at you like this:
If she’s NOT normally into sports, odds are she’s not really interested in what you’re saying but just the fact that you’re talking.
2. If she calls you “big head”, “mumu boy” a couple times a day, it’s really reverse psychology.
It’s not an insult, it’s more of an endearment. Just insert “my” before the “big head” and “mumu boy”.
3. She’ll do funny things at you with her eyes.
She’ll try not to be too obvious with the winking thing. She’ll fail woefully at it.
4. She’ll laugh at everything you say.
Like, not AT you sha. More of with you. Or because of you. But she’ll really find everything you say HI.LA.RI.O.US!
5. She’ll sha be touching you.
But not like in a creepy way. More like in a “ooo, let me see your watch. The strap is sooo smoooth” kind of way.
6. She’ll lean on your shoulders, play with your face, poke your stomach…
…you sha get. Think: Winnie the Pooh and his good friend Christopher Robin, where she is Christopher Robin. She’ll want to play with you like a teddy bear. Odds are she might have even named her teddy bear after you.
7. She’ll ask you, a hundred times a day, if you’ve eaten.
It is not only a Nigerian mother thing. Your physical welfare is her utmost concern.
8. She’ll give you a full frontal hug.
A complete full frontal hug with two arms around you, not just one.
9. However, if you find that you are not sure how to tell the signals she is giving you, then odds are she ISN’T. Abort Mission! Repeat: ABORT MISSION!
For more Zikoko Guides, see this one about making a Nigerian horror movie:
Body dysmorphia is a mental health disorder that makes you obsess over your physical appearance. You constantly try to fix or hide these perceived flaws that may not be noticeable to others but yourself. We spoke to five Nigerian women about what it is like hating their body in a way that makes them obsess […]
Today’s subject on Abroad Life is a woman who moved to the UK seven months ago for her master’s. She talks about how travelling when she was young inspired her to japa, how she handled all the challenges that came with moving abroad, and her plans for the future. First things first, why are you […]
Sometimes we get overwhelmed and make decisions we later regret. In this article, seven Nigerian women talk about why they regret leaving their ex. Tomisin, 25 My ex used to send me not less than 50k every month. He moved abroad and after two months, he told me he has fallen in love with someone […]
People love us for various reasons. Take this quiz and we’ll tell you what your friends love most about you. Relationships can be hard, and sometimes you just need someone to give you a bit of advice. Ask Ozzy is our new advice column where you send Zikoko the relationship questions that have been bugging […]
While smart investing is a sure way to build and retain wealth, it can be a daunting prospect for beginners. In the same vein, it is a lot easier when you understand the various options in which you can invest and ultimately grow your wealth. Here are some options you can consider when taking the […]
So many reasons can cause the end of a friendship, but some are pettier than others. These seven Nigerian women tell us the pettiest reasons why they stopped being friends with someone. Chisom, 22 My friend and I have not spoken for two years because of fish pie. She started ignoring me in our third […]
With No Nut November FINALLY coming to an end, we’ve decided to mark the torturous month with some more horny content. After quizzes that guessed how many people you’ve slept with, how good you are in bed and who you’ll sleep with next, this one will guess when next you’ll get lucky. Take it to […]
Do you have even a single romantic bone in your body? Well, if you’re not sure about just how sweet and thoughtful you can be to someone you love, that’s what this quiz is here to answer. 11 Quizzes For Nigerians Who Are Ready To Marry Are you ready to marry? Take these quizzes.
There are two types of people in Nigeria right now: those who are proud Marlians, and those who are still in denial about stanning the divisive star. So, for those who proudly wear the Marlian tag, we made a quiz to test how well you really know Naira Marley. If you get more than 6 […]
We already tried to guess how much you have in your account and your current net worth, and we think we did a pretty great job (keep any complaints to yourself). Now, we’re going to try and guess your monthly salary based on your relationship with money. Oya, take the quiz: 11 Timed Quizzes For […]
Most of us can probably sketch a pretty accurate outline of the Nigerian map, but how many of us can honestly claim to know where all the states are located? Well, this quiz is here to test just how well you know your own country. Try and get at least 18 states:
We are going to be attempting to guess when you’ll marry based on your favourite Nigerian foods. What does your fave swallow have to do with when you’ll tie the knot? Please, don’t ask complicated questions. This quiz is rigorous and accurate (don’t quote us), so just take it already. QUIZ: Why Do You Have […]
Children’s day, a day set apart for kids. Like they don’t win at life already? You’re not paying bills or rent and you have a day to celebrate yourself? Get me their manager, please. On days like this, we can’t help but remember how good we used to have it so we wrote this article […]
Are you a Nigerian Student? Are you in a relationship with a fellow Nigerian student? If your answer to these questions is “yes”, then definitely understand these struggles stated below The roommate that does not understand privacy You have been telling Cynthia about how bae is coming over for some private time since the beginning […]
Phillipine movies usually follow a pattern that has become obvious and annoying. Consider this list a documentation of that annoyance by once loyal fans.
Forget Tunji and Daniella, if you’re wondering who your best friend is, it’s most definitely the phone you’re either reading this from or the phone that’s somewhere within your vision; we know this because you’re definitely a phone addict that gets a little impatient when you’re too far away from your phone. Okay, let’s not […]
Yes, Valentine’s Day is almost here. Love notes, chocolates, hampers, and everything that comes with it. But while everyone is being hit by cupid’s arrow, there are some people who don’t even feel the hype. If you’re one of them, then grab a seat at this table. 1. You, when you hear that Valentine is […]
In case you have not realised it, Nigerians have a PhD in lying. Multiple PhDs, even. And there are some people who are professors in the art of lying, but we will keep that conversation for another day. Anyway, here is a list of common lies Nigerians tell. Don’t lie, we know you must told […]
Anyone who grew up in a Nigerian household understands that the Saturday routine does not change. It is the same yesterday, today and forever. If you are a true Nigerian, then you’ll understand these pictures and their connection to Saturday mornings. 1. Morning devotion by 6:00 AM. In which your parents can slap you for […]
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
Life is already hard. Deciding where to eat and get the best lifestyle experiences, isn't something you should stress about. Let VRSUS do that for you.
Z! Stacks
Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in:
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
People love us for various reasons. Take this quiz and we’ll tell you what your friends love most about you. Relationships can be hard, and sometimes you just need someone to give you a bit of advice. Ask Ozzy is our new advice column where you send Zikoko the relationship questions that have been bugging […]
Join The Conversation
Bring a friend.