If you’ve not heard the gist, the minister of Science and Technology recently vowed to land Nigeria’s first astronaut in space before 2030.
For those here for the banter like us, check out this accurate timeline of the Space Mission 2030.
December 1, 2029 NTA: Nigeria will be joining the league of countries to send a man to the Mars.
January 4, 2030 NTA: Engineer Chuka Shehu Femi will be Nigeria’s first man on the Mars. More details about him to follow
January 4, 2030 10:00 TheCable: NUPENG, PENGASSAN to go on strike over planned Mars mission. More to follow
January 4, 2030 10:30 Punch: Breaking: Religious Groups protest over Atheist Engineer on Mars mission. “How will he pray to get there”
January 7,2030 12:30 PremiumTimes: Minority Groups kick against marginalisation in Space Mission
January 8, 2030 NTA: Senate go on 3 weeks recess, will begin Space Mission probe upon resumption
January 9, 2030 SaharaReporters: Save Nigeria Group seeks Court order to suspend all Space Missions
January 15, 2030 SaharaReporters: Breaking- Engineer Chuka laments “My life is in danger”
January 21, 2030 10:00 PremiumTimes: Federal High Court in Kutuwenji grants injunction suspending Space Mission to Mars
January 24, 2030 NTA: Breaking – Presidency approves inclusion of 6 astronauts, claims Federal Character
February 1, 2030 The Economist: Space Travel, Is Nigeria serious?
February 3, 2030 ThisDay: NSA Boss, Spaceship too small for 6 people, can only take 3.
February 6, 2030 ThisDay Style: The astronaut and their beautiful wives, Love in Space and Beyond.
February 6, 2030 Made: The Spacesuits, everything you need to know from designer, Mai Atafo
February 7, 2030 LindaIkeji: Outrage on Twitter as feminists lament non inclusion of women on Space Mission
February 7, 2030 09:30 SaharaReporters: Breaking: Wife of Nigeria Space Agency boss embroiled in Multi Billion Naira designer bag scandal
February 9, 2030 BudgtIT: The real cost of Nigeria’s Mission to Mars. Infographics, click here
February 10, 2030 SaharaReporters: How Nigeria Space Agency bought secondhand spaceship from China costing over $150Billion
February 11, 2030 ThisDay: Nigeria’s Opposition party labels Mission to Mars a colossal waste. “People are hungry, Mars is not Priority”
February 11, 2030 18:00 PremiumTimes: “They had 10 years to go to Mars but didn’t, they are wailing” Layi Momodu, Presidential Spokesman
March 1, 2030 Guardian: Celebrations across Nigeria as Spaceship is launched. “We have arrived”
March 2, 2030 NSA Digest: Fuel on Nigeria Spaceship cannot get to Mars. Moon likely destination
March 4, 2030 CNN: 300 days Nigeria Mars trip cut to 3 days Moon trip due to fuel issue.
March 5, 2030 PremiumTimes: “300 days trip in Space, President never said it was to Mars” Presidency
March 7, 2030 Punch: Space team to spend 300 days on the Moon to help Presidency save face.
March 8, 2030 SaharaReporters: How NSA Boss diverted Space fuel funds to overseas account.
March 12, 2030 SaharaReporters: Houseboy of neighbour to husband of NSA wife’s best friend’s younger sister picked up by EFCC.
March 15, 2030 PremiumTimes: Presidency rejects association with I fly with the President group.
June 20, 2030 ThisDay: 300 day Mission reduced to 100 days as Fasting season approaches.
June 20, 2030 10:00 SaharaReporters: Embattled NSA chief “Religious reasons for shortened trip are baseless. We found what we are looking for”
June 20, 2030 10:30 Punch: National Opposition Party jests “The thing they found on the Moon, does it have a name?”
June 22, 2030 PremiumTimes: President okays return of Spaceship in live video chat with crew on Paris trip.
July 30, 2030 BusinessDay: Nigeria Spaceship company, Arik Spaceshuttle Ltd, to commence commercial flights to Space
December 4, 2031 SaharaReporters: Nigerians stranded on Mars as Arik delays return trip by 3 months.
There’s something last borns that gets Nigerians talking. But then again, Nigerians are the king of forming wrong impressions about everything, so but sometimes it can get to you. Especially when everything being said is false. Here is a list of wrong things Nigerians say about every last born. We think it’s time to stop. […]
The latecomers. This category of people wait till it’s almost time for prayer before leaving the office or work and you can find them always rushing to meet up with prayers. Their mantra when they meet anyone on the road is “have they prayed?” Front row gang. These people come like 4hours before service, they […]
Ask the Yoruba men in your life if we’re right about this list or not. If you look hard enough, you’d find one or two of these songs on their sex playlist too.
Romantic relationships are great, and doing romanz is sweet. But let’s not lie, there are some things that we don’t like about dating. Relationship weight is one of them.
Because you’re in love, you want to wake up and make food for someone that’s still sleeping and didn’t send message, abi? What if you pour hot tea on their face? What if you fall with the food on the stairs? So many what-ifs…
Everyone has something to say about what kind of person they are. But how well do we truthfully evaluate these things? Not that much, I can assure you. The average person is always lying to themselves to make sure they look good. But you know what and who doesn’t lie? Zikoko quizzes that’s what. Take […]
Are you an ajebutter or not? Well, if you’ve gone through life blissfully unaware of its harshness, then you probably are. Now, we want to know just how high you rank on that ajebutter scale, using your food preferences as a (very accurate) measure. Take to find out:
We already tried to guess how much you have in your account and your current net worth, and we think we did a pretty great job (keep any complaints to yourself). Now, we’re going to try and guess your monthly salary based on your relationship with money. Oya, take the quiz: 11 Timed Quizzes For […]
Last month, we thoughtfully made a quiz telling you guys exactly when you’ll marry, but some of you claimed that your spouse was nowhere to be found. Well, now we’ve created one that’ll tell you exactly who you’ll be dragging down that aisle. Take and start planning that wedding: 11 Quizzes For Nigerians Who Are […]
At some point in life, we all learnt that someone can be very intelligent and still lack common sense. That’s the difference between being book smart and being street smart. If you’re not sure where on the spectrum you fall, well, that’s what this quiz is here to tell you. Take it:
Children’s day, a day set apart for kids. Like they don’t win at life already? You’re not paying bills or rent and you have a day to celebrate yourself? Get me their manager, please. On days like this, we can’t help but remember how good we used to have it so we wrote this article […]
Are you a Nigerian Student? Are you in a relationship with a fellow Nigerian student? If your answer to these questions is “yes”, then definitely understand these struggles stated below The roommate that does not understand privacy You have been telling Cynthia about how bae is coming over for some private time since the beginning […]
Phillipine movies usually follow a pattern that has become obvious and annoying. Consider this list a documentation of that annoyance by once loyal fans.
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
Life is already hard. Deciding where to eat and get the best lifestyle experiences, isn't something you should stress about. Let VRSUS do that for you.
Z! Stacks
Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in:
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
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