The year is coming to an end, but your company doesn’t look like they plan on ending the work year. Well, since they’ve decided to choose violence, we have some ideas on how to get them to close by force.
DISCLAIMER: If you end up unemployed, Zikoko didn’t send you message. Abeg.
Kidnap your CEO
Obviously everyone in the company will spend their time and resources looking for him. The company will have to close by force. If they still prove stubborn, demand that his release is conditional on the fact that they close down for Christmas.
Buy padlock and lock everyone out
Arrive earlier than everyone else in the company and change the padlock. Go back home then resume at the normal time. Now, pretend to be shocked that they’re locked out.
Change the social media password
Change the password of all the social media accounts and start posting rubbish. They’ll think they’ve been hacked and will be forced to close. You can even use the social media account to air their smelling behaviour for all to see.
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Blackmail HR
Find something scandalous about HR, and threaten to leak the secret if they don’t force y’all to close for the holidays. Better set up your camera and start stalking HR 24/7.
Sue for emotional damages
Choosing to make you work at the end of the year is damaging to your mental and physical health. If they don’t close, you’d have to take them to court. Even if they win the case, do they really want to waste money on legal fees? They’ll close for their pockets, and you’ll get to relax for the holidays.
Disconnect the power grid
If you work from an office, what you need to do is disconnect their power supply. No power = no work. The math is simple.
Sell the company
When there’s no company remaining, nothing stops the management from not only closing for the holidays but forever and ever. You might become poor, but at least, you’ll be home for the holidays.
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