How Nigeria Can Easily Qualify for the World Cup

March 25, 2022

The Super Eagles of Nigeria are set to battle the Black Stars of Ghana over a two-legged tie between 25th–29th March 2022, for a ticket to the 2022 FIFA World Cup in Qatar. Here’s how we can qualify without stress.

1) Refuse Buhari’s Call

The last time Buhari called, we lost. Now, they shouldn’t even mention his name near the field. If he calls, let it ring. They can call him back after the they’ve won. 

2) Invoke the angels from Africa 

This may be a bit tricky since we’re invoking angels from Africa against another African country, but it’s first come first served: whoever calls upon the angels first will enjoy their services. So if we’ve not began summoning, we should start now. 

3) Seize all the eggs in Ghana 

If we seize all the eggs in Ghana, we can demand that the country forfeits the match. With the way Ghanaians love eggs, they’ll give into our demands in less than an hour. 

RELATED: We Ranked All the Types of Eggs From Worst to Best 

4) Print our own qualification certificate

Cyber cafes are plenty and printers are not scarce. If we print  our own certificate, the FIFA  has to accept it. Do they know who we are?

5) Dust Ghana in the qualifiers 

Obviously, the most straightforward path to qualify for the World Cup is to beat Ghana on the pitch.  

6) Legwork practice

Football players need strong legs, and what better way to strengthen your legs than to legwork? Three hours of legwork is enough to give our football players strong legs and prevent injuries. 

RELATED: 8 Reasons Why the Nigerian Government Must Ban Legwork 

7) Jollof rice cooking competition

We need to convince the federation that the match needs to leave the field and enter the kitchen. Nigerian jollof is superior and a jollof competition will easily secure Nigeria a win. 

RELATED: The Craziest Things Men Do for the Love of Sports

Join The Conversation

Bring a friend.

You'll like this

Watch

Now on Zikoko

Recommended Quizzes

March 24, 2020

While we know that a lot of the best Nigerian artists deservedly have fans across generations, that won’t stop us from attempting to guess how old you are based on your taste in Nigerian music. So, take this quiz to see if we got it right:

What are you like in a relationship?
February 7, 2020

Your taste in music can say a lot about you, and this time, it’s going to reveal what you are like in a relationship. So, pick a few of your favourite Nigerian love songs, and we’ll let you know if you’re typically a distant, passionate or unbothered partner. Here you go:

December 11, 2019

In the past month, we’ve made quizzes that guessed the last time you had sex, how many people you’ve slept with, and just how good you are in bed. For our latest attempt, we will use your taste in Nigerian music from the 2010s to ascertain what you’re like in bed. Take to find out:

April 9, 2020

At some point in life, we all learnt that someone can be very intelligent and still lack common sense. That’s the difference between being book smart and being street smart. If you’re not sure where on the spectrum you fall, well, that’s what this quiz is here to tell you. Take it:

how tall are you
March 11, 2020

Did your parents give you enough beans when you were growing up? If they did, then you’re probably around 6’0″ and above. Either way, we created a quiz that can guess your current height (pretty accurately, if we do say so ourselves). Take to see if we nailed it:

More from Inside Life

Stealing
July 2, 2022

Most Lagosians have a Computer Village story; some are hilarious and others are terrifying. They range from buying a phone and seeing semo inside the box when you get home, to having someone shake your hand and realising five minutes later that your phone is gone. If you have a Computer Village horror story, you […]

Watch

Trending Videos

Zikoko Originals

December 14, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
November 2, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
October 26, 2020
A collection of videos documenting some of the events of the EndSARS protests.
June 22, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
June 22, 2020
Hacked is an interesting new series by Zikoko made up of fictional but hilarious chat conversations.
June 4, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
June 2, 2020
Quickie is a video series where everyone featured gets only one minute to rant, review or do absolutely anything.
May 14, 2020
Isolation Diary is a Zikoko series that showcases what isolation is like for one young Nigerian working from home due to the Coronavirus pandemic.
March 12, 2020
Life is already hard. Deciding where to eat and get the best lifestyle experiences, isn't something you should stress about. Let VRSUS do that for you.

Z! Stacks

Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in:

Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.
X