9 Ways To Identify Your “Village People”

November 15, 2021

Your village people won’t wear a sign stating their agenda in your life, which is why you should identify them before they come after you.

These are some ways to fish them out.

1. They stan patience Ozokwor, Kanayo O. Kanayo and Chiwetalu Agu

If you think this is a coincidence, think again. From who they stan, you shall know them.

2. They always know about good things that happen in your life before you tell them

If you ever share good news with someone, and they say they’re already aware of the developments, fear them. That’s a village person right there.

3. They work in NEPA office

I mean, this is the biggest red flag of all. That’s why there’s always a power outage when you’re about to iron your work clothes.

4. They ask questions like “How are you?” too often

How else will they confirm if their plot against you is working if they don’t ask about your well-being? Better reply with “I’m fine” and avoid them.

5. They’re the first and last person you see daily

Village people thrive on dominating your life. So, the more you see of them, the better their chances of putting sand in your garri.

6. They smile too much when you’re around

This is one of the tactics they use to mask their village-peopleness. Don’t for fall it.

7. They appear in your dreams

Plead the blood of Jesus and mark their face.

8. They laugh at your misfortunes in the name of “jokes”

The only reason why they find your downfall funny is because they caused it. Classic village person move.

9. If you see this type of pot in their house

Never eat food cooked in a pot like this if you like your destiny.

Join The Conversation

Bring a friend.

You'll like this

December 2, 2019

There are a lot of power-drunk people in Nigeria, with bouncers ranking very high up on that list. To be fair, you’d be power-drunk too if you were built like a trailer and had the ability to stop anyone from entering somewhere they really want to be. So, if you want that kind of power, […]

August 1, 2021

We recently stumbled upon a secret ancient book of Nigerian women’s secrets that has been passed down from generation to generation. The book contained the guide to being a wicked Nigerian woman, a stubborn Nigerian woman, and so much more. But one thing that attracted us was the chapter that contained the guide to shooting […]

December 13, 2019

Social media is a crazy street where everyone gets to showcase their talent and trigger their imaginations in the best (or worst) way possible while garnering followers. Sometimes this leads to new and useful innovations, other times it gets one asking WTF? Some of these WTF moments involve slangs and phrases no one understands, we […]

Watch

Now on Zikoko

November 25, 2022

Just three months to the start of the 2023 elections, the National Chairman of the All Progressives Congress (APC), Senator Abdullahi Adamu, started a beef with the Independent National Electoral Commission (INEC). It wasn’t about electoral violence or vote buying but rather a new feature of the 2023 elections. The APC national chairman believes Nigeria […]

Recommended Quizzes

January 2, 2020

Do you have even a single romantic bone in your body? Well, if you’re not sure about just how sweet and thoughtful you can be to someone you love, that’s what this quiz is here to answer. 11 Quizzes For Nigerians Who Are Ready To Marry  Are you ready to marry? Take these quizzes.

February 26, 2020

Are you all set for marriage, or are you still figuring it out? Well, if you’re curious to know the answer, then this is the quiz for you. All you have to do is create your own ideal Nollywood wedding film, and we’ll tell you if you’re ready to say “I do”. Go ahead:

November 19, 2019

Regardless of what society has tried to tell us, enjoying sex is not something to be ashamed of. So, in a bid to celebrate our generation’s sexual agency, we’ve created a quiz that will accurately (again, keep your complaints to yourself) infer how many people you’ve spelt with. Try it out: 11 Quizzes For The […]

More from Inside Life

Watch

Trending Videos

Zikoko Originals

September 13, 2022
Vs The World is a Zikoko original video series that follows best friends Astor and Hassan as they take on the world.
August 23, 2022
Zikoko Ships is a Zikoko Original series where we invite two people who share a relationship to play the Zikoko card games
December 14, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
November 2, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
October 26, 2020
A collection of videos documenting some of the events of the EndSARS protests.
June 22, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
June 22, 2020
Hacked is an interesting new series by Zikoko made up of fictional but hilarious chat conversations.
June 4, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
June 2, 2020
Quickie is a video series where everyone featured gets only one minute to rant, review or do absolutely anything.
May 14, 2020
Isolation Diary is a Zikoko series that showcases what isolation is like for one young Nigerian working from home due to the Coronavirus pandemic.

Z! Stacks

Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in:

Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.
X