1) Shaki:

Because while you want to look at the tasty piece of intestine you’re eating, it’s most likely covered in a peppery soup or stew that will blind the shit out of you if the shaki bounces back.

2) Ponmo:

Ponmo exists in 2 states:

• Soft as a cloud
• Hard as the soles of the feet of a person who attends Celestial Church of Light

Not knowing which you’re going to get at any given time is what makes it equal parts frustrating and exciting.

3) Fufu:

There are few things more exciting than eating a mountain of fufu at lunch on a weekday at work and then waiting to see if it’ll knock you out or not.

4) Watermelon:

Are you going to successfully finish eating this fruit that is 92% water or will you choke on the seeds and die? Grab a slice and find out.

5) Biscuit Bone:

Before you bite down on that piece of meat, ask yourself: Is this really biscuit bone or did the butcher with the gold tooth sell you a regular bone and lie about it? Are you about to chomp down and wreck all your teeth?

6) Avocado:

I have a theory that the freshness of an avocado is in a constant state of flux (between “hella fresh” and “3 day old corpse”) until it’s opened. The thrill comes from not knowing which state you’re gonna find it in.

7) Agbalumo:

Do you know how horrifying it is to be halfway done eating an agbalumo only to find a maggot in it? I’ll leave y’all with the thought of what that implies.

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