relationships | Page 31 of 110

Aliya* (22) has been earning money since she was 17, and it was primarily driven by necessity.

In this story, she shares how money brought her independence from her abusive family, allowed her to self-sponsor her education and pursue a better life.

TW: Physical and financial abuse.

Aliya’s story, as told to Boluwatife

Being the last of six children meant my parents had me really late — both were in their 60s when I was born. I think their age led them to believe they couldn’t be hands-on with training and disciplining me, so they outsourced the work to my older brothers. My brothers took the job so seriously that it turned into abuse.

Actually, it was mostly just one brother. My other brothers had their moments, but my second-eldest brother, Jamiu*, was the main terror.

We have a 10-year age gap, and his word was law. Jamiu was the first to attend uni in our house, and my parents trusted his judgement because he was the most educated. Whenever Jamiu returned home from school, dread followed him and settled into everyone’s hearts.

Jamiu would beat me for the silliest reasons. I could’ve washed the plates, but someone else used one and dropped it in the sink. That one plate would earn me a severe beating. One time, I was hit over the head with a stool.

Everything was blown out of proportion, and all my parents did was occasionally apologise on his behalf. Even these moments ended with them advising me not to annoy him next time. They never told him to stop.

My parents, on the other hand, approached discipline differently. They provided all I needed, from school fees to food. They cared for me and were generally protective of me as the last-born.

However, whenever I offended them or did something they didn’t like, they responded by withholding money. This came in the form of not giving me money for food.

It was something like, “No food for you until you’re truly sorry for what you’ve done.” My siblings would’ve eaten an hour or two before my parents gave me money to buy my own food.

That happened a lot because I often behaved badly and occasionally stepped on people’s toes. I knew I couldn’t put up with the beatings or the withholding of money as punishment, so I started thinking of how to make my own money.

I thought I wouldn’t have to depend on anyone again if I became independent, and my brothers wouldn’t mistreat me anymore.

In secondary school, I began using my writing skills to earn lunch money. I wrote stories in 2A notebooks, and my classmates borrowed them to read. Sometimes, they gave me their snack money to read the books.

Actual monetisation happened after I finished secondary school in 2019. Someone in a WhatsApp group shared that they were looking for a writer to work on a fiction novel. They had the outline already, but they needed someone to write the actual story. I said I could do it, and I got the job. I was 17 at the time.

The project was a 50,000-word book, and I completed it in four days because I was so excited at the prospect of making money. I was paid ₦25k, at ₦0.5 per word. After that, I actively pursued more ghostwriting gigs. Some of the ones I got didn’t pay as well, but I had some money coming in, and it was great.

Making money also proved my financial independence theory right. My parents still handled my basic needs, but having extra to get the things I wanted, like a used iPhone 7+ and a MacBook in 2021, meant my brothers respected me more and stopped hitting me.

Also, I started contributing financially to the home. I regularly bought fuel for the generator, randomly bought random food items for the house and often took my brother’s children out for pizza and ice cream.

My parents began to see me as an adult, so whenever my siblings tried to report me for something, they’d go, “Oh, you know she’s working. Just leave her.” Everyone ultimately learned to leave me alone. It was great.

I started making big girl money from writing in 2022. I had my ghostwriting gigs, but I also found writing platforms that paid me to publish fiction on the site. By this time, my income was comfortably around ₦300k/month.

Sometimes, I made more, especially when I received bonuses from writing platforms for completing a book.

I’m glad my experience with my family pushed me to look for money. I’m currently at a university in Kigali, and I sponsored myself here with the money I made from writing.

This is how it happened: I’d already tried uni twice in Nigeria between 2019 and 2021, and it didn’t work out. The first time, I wrote JUPEB and didn’t get direct entry. The second time, I was admitted, but I didn’t understand the course, and I kept failing. That was largely due to my undiagnosed ADHD. The point was, my parents had sponsored me twice, and I’d let them down.

After those two experiences, I no longer wanted to study in Nigeria. But studying abroad wasn’t really an option because my parents couldn’t afford it. Then, in December 2023, a friend sent me information about the uni in Kigali. The tuition was $3k/year, but grants could reduce the amount to $1k payable over three instalments. So, I applied and got admission in 2024.

My first tuition instalment was $300, and I also needed to pay $180 for insurance, which brought the total fee after conversion to ₦850k. My flight cost ₦450k, and accommodation was another R₣175k (₦188k in naira) for the first month. I also had about ₦21k to pay for a student visa. I gathered the money in about two months and paid all these fees myself without seeking any input from my family.

I didn’t even tell my family about my relocation until two weeks before my flight. It was only my mum that I gave a month’s notice. Initially, I kept it to myself because I wanted to figure out how to pay my fees first. Then later, it was because I didn’t want anyone to question my decision. My brothers would’ve interrogated me about how much I’d spent, and I didn’t have that energy.

Currently, I support my living expenses with the money I earn from writing and using freelance platforms. I make $200/month on average, which is almost R₣300k. My income primarily covers my rent and foodstuffs. If I need extra money, I occasionally take on small, menial jobs. My parents also support me financially when I absolutely need it.

My program here runs for three years, after which I hope to pursue a master’s degree in the UK or another European country.

Overall, I live a good life, and I don’t regret any of the decisions that brought me here. In a way, I’m grateful to my family for helping me see things better. I’m living the life I’ve always wanted, and it’s only going to get better.

*Names have been changed for the sake of anonymity.

NEXT READ: My Family Resents Me for Becoming the Breadwinner After My Parents Retired

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I was looking for stories about relationships that left people to pick up the pieces alone when I came across *Monsurat, 49.

In this story, she shares how a quiet office romance turned into a life-changing betrayal, how she discovered her colleague had a hidden family, and what it’s like raising a child alone while still sharing an office space with the man who refuses to acknowledge either of them.

This is Monsurat’s story as told to Adeyinka

At 49, I’ve never been married, though I came close three times. Each man promised to “come and see” my people when he got promoted, built his house, or found whatever milestone he was chasing. The milestones arrived; the men didn’t. By the time I met *Hakeem in 2009, I no longer entertained fantasies of a grand wedding party. I only wanted someone who wouldn’t abandon me halfway; someone I could do life with.

Hakeem arrived after a routine interstate transfer from Ogun to Lagos. He was polite, softly voiced, with a work ethic that our directors praised. We began as casual colleagues, sharing walks to the bus stop, swapping news about poor salaries, and helping each other with overwhelming tasks. The friendship developed even though we weren’t actively trying to cultivate one — it just happened. He presented himself as single, living with cousins in Surulere while saving for a flat. Soon, our office lunches stretched into Saturday visits. He met my siblings; I met a grand aunt of his who lived in Lagos, and she was really pleasant. Nobody raised a red flag.

We kept the relationship discreet, even though some colleagues could tell we had something going on. By our second year together, everyone had quietly accepted that “Monsurat and Hakeem” were an item. When I became pregnant, congratulations came from everywhere. It was jarring because we tried to keep our business lowkey.

During the pregnancy, Hakeem remained calm. He bought everything I needed, escorted me to clinic visits, and I was glad I wasn’t experiencing the journey alone. I asked about formalising our union before the baby arrived, but he said his finances couldn’t accommodate a wedding ceremony and plans for childbirth at the same time. “Give me time,” he repeated, and even though I didn’t like the idea of having my first child out of wedlock, I believed in him. Time passed; my due date drew near. Still no flat, no introduction ceremony—only more visits to my one‑bedroom apartment, after which he’d return to his unseen Surulere house.

Our baby finally arrived in November 2011. Hakeem stood by, signing forms, paying part of the bill, smiling like a man satisfied with God’s mercy. During the naming, my mother joked about picking aso-ebi for our wedding soon. He offered no answer, only smiled and kept it moving.

A month later, urgent work became Hakeem’s everyday story. Calls rang unanswered. Weekends passed without visits. When I pressed, he blamed technical training, then distant relatives, then a financial audit that required travel. Two months into my maternity leave, I saw him three times. Each visit ended quickly because the baby developed a sudden fever and a cry that wouldn’t stop until Hakeem stepped outside. The first few times, we blamed the heat. Then, later, we chalked it up to baby tantrums. By the fourth month, my mother said, “There is something spiritual here.” But I dismissed her concerns and told her babies react to unfamiliar scents, nothing more.

Then, one random Saturday morning, I got a surprise visit. Two women stood in matching hijabs. The elder introduced herself as Hakeem’s wife; the other was her younger sister. They spoke softly, eyes downcast. Hakeem, they said, had three children. He’d requested the Lagos transfer to escape responsibilities he’d fallen behind on — school fees, rent, and family expectations. They weren’t here to fight me, they said; only to clear confusion before it destroyed more people.

When they left, the silence in my room felt like a verdict. I counted the signs I’d ignored: his reluctance to show me where he lived, the excuses about money, the cousins I met only in open places. If betrayal had a taste, it would be the dryness in my mouth that afternoon.

Hakeem returned two days later. I told him his wife had visited. He sighed, as if relief and regret shared the same breath, and admitted the truth. He said he didn’t know how to confess once I’d conceived. He claimed he loved me, begged me to be patient until he “sorted things out.” I asked what there was to sort besides honesty. He had no answer. Voices rose; the baby cried nonstop for hours, and Hakeem left before dusk.

After that, each time he visited, our son would wail, develop a fever, and settle only when Hakeem left. A doctor found nothing wrong. Family called it spiritual; Hakeem called it proof that the child wasn’t his. Soon, he stopped showing up altogether.

At work, we became strangers. One of my bosses, who was aware of our situation, once pulled us aside to discuss “domestic tension”. I requested a desk transfer to another floor, and once I realised he wasn’t willing to take any responsibility for the child, I filed internal welfare letters asking Hakeem to contribute to childcare. He ignored them.

The entire time, his grandaunt and other relatives I had met begged me to exercise patience. According to them, whatever was happening was spiritually orchestrated, and even though they didn’t say it outright, they insinuated Hakeem’s first wife was responsible.

The back and forth between families and the welfare department at work took months, with my mental health completely shattered while at it. I couldn’t understand how this man, who seemed like the best of them, suddenly turned into a stranger. Sometimes, I tell myself it would have been better if he had refused responsibility for the pregnancy and prepared me enough for what the future would look like. But that wasn’t the case. Hakeem held my hands throughout my pregnancy, all the way up to the moment we welcomed our child. It only went downhill after the baby arrived.

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Before our baby turned three, he tried to make amends by taking responsibility. At that point, I didn’t want anything to do with him; I just needed him to be a father to our child. But whenever he showed up, everything went wrong with our child. Screams, rising temperatures, seizures, even. It was exhausting, yet the perfect excuse for Hakeem to keep his distance.

The baby’s distress eased when he turned four, but that was mainly because Hakeem never showed up again. Family friends said the crying proved that the first wife had “done something.” I refused that line of thought, though on restless nights I wondered: why did my son sense what I failed to?

At work, Hakeem and I interact like strangers: a nod, nothing more. I requested a transfer to a unit on a different floor; HR approved it quietly. Hakeem takes leave every few months. There are times I’ve assumed his unexplained absence means he quit, but we’re government workers. You don’t just up and quit because you feel like it. Whenever payroll officers suggested deducting child support, Hakeem cited multiple dependents and presented receipts from his first family. I could have pushed harder, but I didn’t have the fight in me.

Our child turns 14 this year, and he knows his father’s face only from a photograph taken at the naming. He once asked, “Does he live far away?” I said, “Far enough.” He didn’t press.

In quiet moments, I remember how Hakeem’s relatives in Lagos referred to me as “our wife.” They saw the truth and withheld it. I wonder whether loyalty to blood outweighs loyalty to justice. Then I pack the thought away; bitterness is a tax I can’t afford.

Hakeem still clocks in at work, although he’s worked his way to another branch within the state. We often cross paths at general meetings and conferences, but we tend to pass each other by and avoid contact. I still do my work, then go home to the only person whose love hasn’t wavered. Some may call this a resignation. I call it choosing the fight I can win: raising a boy to be nothing like his father.

When colleagues gossip, I adjust my glasses and keep typing. My story is simple: I trusted someone who lied, and I am living with the consequences.

But I am still living, still working, still saving, still laughing when my son brings home 95 per cent in mathematics. Some nights I pray, “God, may he never inherit his father’s trait.” Other nights, I’m tempted to call Hakeem and lash out.

But my mum would always say, “At least the relationship bore fruit.” That, for now, is enough to keep me going.

ALSO READ: My Mother Abandoned Me for a Cult and Never Looked Back

Your mum’s birthday is more than just another date on the calendar. It’s a chance to celebrate the woman who raised you, prayed for you, and probably threatened you more times than you can count. Finding the right birthday wishes for mum can be tough because how do you put into words everything she means to you?

“My mum’s birthday is my chance to pause and show her how much she’s shaped who I am,” says Dayo, 27. “It’s when I make sure to tell her every year how much I love her.”

Whether she prefers heartfelt prayers, a touch of humour, or long wishes, there’s a perfect message here to make her laugh, or cry happy tears. We’ve compiled over 100 happy birthday wishes and blessings for mum that’ll help you say everything she deserves to hear, and secure your spot as her favourite child.

Short Birthday Wishes for Your Mum

Birthday card with short birthday wishes for mum

Sometimes, a few words are all it takes to make your mum feel appreciated.

“I don’t like long stories on my birthday,” says Tope, 43, a mum of two. “One simple message is enough to make my day.”

Here are some short and sweet birthday wishes for mum to make her day.

It’s my mum’s birthday! I wish you a day filled with as much love as you give to me!

Happy birthday, Mum! You’re my greatest inspiration.

Wishing you the best birthday ever because heaven knows you deserve it.

Happy birthday to a mum who’s forever young at heart

Thanks for all you do for me, Mum. Have an amazing birthday!

Happy birthday to the woman who means the absolute most to me.

Happy birthday to my role model and best friend! I love you so much.

Cheers to another year of being an amazing mum!

I’m so glad that you’re my mum! Happy birthday!

Happy birthday to my first best friend!

Happy birthday, Mum. Thanks for all that you do and all that you are.

I’m lucky to have a mum who’s also my best friend. Happy birthday!

Wishing a special day to the world’s best mum.

I owe everything to you, but for now, happy birthday!

I’m here to make sure that your birthday is as joyful as you are!

We celebrate you every day, but today we’re going to go ten times harder! Happy birthday, mummy!!!

Sending you a birthday wish wrapped with all my love.

I’m so lucky to call you my mum. Sending you all my love on this special day!

Wishing my kind, supportive, and one-of-a-kind mother a very happy birthday.

On this day, the kindest and most caring person was born. Happy birthday, Mum!

ALSO READ: 100+ Birthday Wishes for Your Son That Capture Everything He Means to You

Long Birthday Wishes for Your Mum

Daughter sharing birthday wishes for mum as they hug

Some feelings just can’t fit into a short message, especially when it comes to your mum. A long birthday wish is the perfect way to remind her how much she means to you.

These long and heartfelt birthday wishes for mum will help you say everything your mum deserves to hear.

Happy birthday, Mum! You’ve been my biggest supporter, my most patient teacher, and my forever safe space. I hope this new year brings you joy that never runs dry and peace that flows like a river. You deserve all the love in the world today and always.

To the woman who carried me before the world even knew me — thank you for every sacrifice, every prayer, every hug, and every hard truth. I’m so proud to call you my mother. May your day be as lovely and extraordinary as you are.

Mummy, your strength, grace, and endless love have shaped the person I am today. I don’t say it enough, but I’m grateful for you every single day. Happy birthday to the one who does it all and makes it look effortless.

There’s no one like you, Ma. You love deeply, give selflessly, and forgive easily. I pray this new year rewards you with all the goodness you’ve poured into others. Happy birthday, my queen!

You’re not just my mother, you’re my best friend, my anchor, and my daily inspiration. Thank you for showing me what love, resilience, and strength look like. I celebrate you today and every day.

If I had to choose a lifetime again, I’d still pick you as my mother. You’re simply irreplaceable. Happy birthday to the one whose love raised a whole generation. I love you endlessly.

Mummy, you wear so many hats: nurturer, counsellor, cheerleader, warrior. And you wear them all with such grace. I hope today brings you all the joy you’ve given to everyone around you.

Every good part of me is because of you. Your discipline, your laughter, your unwavering support — all of it has shaped me. I’m blessed beyond measure to be your child. Happy birthday, Mum.

Happy birthday, Mummy. May this year be filled with little joys, answered prayers, and the kind of peace you’ve always wanted. You deserve nothing less.

You taught me to love fearlessly, speak honestly, and dream boldly. I carry your lessons with me everywhere I go. Thank you for everything, Ma. Happy birthday!

The world is brighter, softer, and kinder because you’re in it. Happy birthday to the woman whose love knows no bounds. May this new year treat you gently.

To my first friend, first teacher, and forever hero — happy birthday, Mum. You’ve given me more than I can ever repay, but I’ll spend my life trying.

I hope this day reminds you of how loved and valued you are. Your love is a light that never goes out, and I’m lucky to bask in it. Happy birthday, Mum.

On your special day, I just want to say thank you. For the times you stayed up late worrying, the meals you cooked with love, and the prayers you whispered on my behalf. You’re the real MVP.

You’ve held this family together with nothing but strength and grace. I hope today brings you the kind of peace and celebration you deserve. Happy birthday, Mum.

Happy birthday, my heart. You’ve given so much of yourself to us, and I hope today you get a fraction of that love back. You’re one of one, and I’m blessed to be your child.

You’ve always made birthdays special for us and today, it’s your turn. I hope your day is filled with cake, laughter, and all the things that make your soul happy. I love you much more than I can ever express.

Mum, no one loves like you do. You show up, hold space, and give without expecting anything in return. Today, we celebrate you and everything you stand for. Enjoy your day!

The older I get, the more I understand everything you sacrificed for me. Thank you for your quiet strength and loud love. Happy birthday, Mum.

Happy birthday, my queen. I wish you a birthday filled with sunshine, peace, and the joy of knowing you’ve raised kings and queens. You’re a living legend, Mummy!

ALSO READ: 100+ Birthday Wishes and Blessings for Your Dad

Touching Birthday Wishes for Your Mum

Mother shedding happy tears as children share birthday wishes for mum

Sometimes, you want to go beyond the basic “Happy birthday, Mum” and say something that really touches her heart.

“My mum cried when she read my last birthday message,” Kemi, 29, tells Zikoko. “She said it made her feel truly loved and appreciated.”

If you’re looking for words that will remind her just how much she means to you, these touching birthday wishes are exactly what you need.

Mummy, your love is the reason I believe in goodness. You’ve held me through every storm and celebrated me through every win. I hope today reminds you of just how deeply you are loved.

There’s no gift I could ever give that would measure up to all you’ve done for me. But today, I give you my heart in words: thank you mum, for everything. Happy birthday, Ma.

I’ve watched you give your all even when you had little. Your love is my greatest inheritance. May today bring you all the joy you’ve given me, and more.

Happy birthday, Mum. You’ve been the hands that lifted me, the voice that guided me, and the heart that never gave up on me. I’m forever grateful for you.

No matter how far I go, your love always brings me home. Thank you for being my forever safe space. Happy birthday, Mum.

Mummy, your strength has built bridges for me. Your sacrifices, though often silent, speak the loudest in my life. I celebrate you today and always.

You loved me through every version of myself, even when I didn’t deserve it. I hope this new year brings you peace, laughter, and rest. Happy birthday, my rock.

Every time I pray, I thank God for you. You are truly one of His best gifts to me. May He bless you today with everything your heart desires.

Momsi, I see you not just as a mother, but as a woman who gave her all. May this birthday remind you that you matter, deeply and endlessly.

Your love has covered me more times than I can count. Today, I cover you in celebration, gratitude, and prayers. Happy birthday, my angel in human form.

You’ve always shown up for birthdays, heartbreaks, and every ordinary day in between. I’m honoured to show up for you today. Happy birthday, Mum.

They say no one can replace a mother. But truthfully, no one could ever be you. You’re one of a kind. And I love you more than words can say.

You gave me the world, even when yours was falling apart. I hope today the world gives you a fraction of the love you’ve sown. Happy birthday, Mama.

I grew up watching you be everyone’s strength. I just want to be that for you today. Rest, laugh, and be celebrated. You deserve it all and more.

Some people have role models. I have you, Mum. You’ve taught me what it means to love, lead, and live with grace. I hope this year is good to you.

You’ve given me more than life — you’ve given me love, values, and wings. May this birthday be the start of your most joyful season yet.

No matter how old I get, I’ll always need your prayers, hugs, and “Have you eaten?” calls. Happy birthday to my forever lifeline.

I’ve seen you put everyone before yourself. Today, it’s your turn. May joy surround you, love overwhelm you, and peace find you. Happy birthday, Mummy.

Thank you for fighting battles I never even knew existed, just to make my life easier. You’re a warrior in every sense of the word. I celebrate you today.

Happy birthday to the woman who can make a house feel like home with just her presence. I hope today you feel as seen and celebrated as you’ve always made others feel.

If I had a thousand tongues, I still couldn’t thank you enough. You’ve been my shield, my teacher, my comforter. May life be kind to you this year and always. Happy birthday!

Your love has healed, guided, and uplifted me. I carry your strength like armour. Wishing you a birthday as amazing as the life you’ve lived so far.

ALSO READ: 150+ Birthday Wishes for Myself

Funny Birthday Wishes for Your Mum

Son sharing at funny birthday wishes for mum

Nigerian mums are unintentionally hilarious, so it’s only right we return the energy by giving them something to laugh about too.

Chuka, 26, says, “I wrote my mum a funny birthday message last year. It was so satisfying to hear her laugh.”

If your mum enjoys a good joke, these funny birthday wishes will definitely put a smile on her face.

On your birthday, Mum, I just want to remind you that you’re amazing, irreplaceable, and 100% responsible for how dramatic I turned out.

Mum, thanks for always being the drama queen of the house. Your birthday is the perfect excuse to act extra. Enjoy it!

Happy birthday to the woman who gave me life, and plenty of embarrassing baby pictures!

Mummy, you’re aging like fine wine — even though you don’t drink — and only getting better every year!

Happy birthday, mum! You’re the only person who makes multitasking look easy.

Thanks for always being my biggest fan, even though I’m not that cool. Happy birthday, mum!

Happy birthday! You’re the queen of our family and the doctor of the house.

Wishing the happiest birthday to the mum who does it all – and still has time to look fabulous.

Happy birthday, my melanin queen. Thank you for the good genes.

I’m pretty sure I’m the favourite child, but since it’s your special day, I won’t put you on the spot! Happy birthday, mum!

Happy birthday to the one who’s seen me at my best and my worst! Thanks for enduring plenty of “worst” days.

Whenever someone asks me how I turned out so gorgeous, I tell them, “I got it from my mama!” Happy birthday to the most fabulous woman I know.

You gave birth to the greatest gift you’ll ever receive. Me! Happy birthday, mum!

Happy birthday, Mummy. With all my drama as a teenager, it’s a miracle I didn’t send you to an early grave!

I know this card will end up in your drawer along with every other birthday card, Mother’s Day card, and scrap of paper I ever scribbled on. I love you for that.

I got you the best gift you could possibly receive: me! Happy birthday, mum.

You deserve the world, mum. Unfortunately, that wasn’t in the budget this year, so you must settle for this card.

I know you probably don’t know what a “baddie” is, but I’ve seen the pictures of you from the ‘80s up until this very day. Trust me, you’re a true baddie!

Happy birthday to my dear mother. Thanks for never leaving me in the market and running away. I know it must’ve been tempting at times.

I was trying to think of funny birthday wishes to send you, but I couldn’t come up with anything. Just pretend I wrote something hilarious. Happy birthday, mum!

ALSO READ: 150+ Perfect Birthday Wishes to Make Your Wife Feel Loved

Birthday Prayers for Your Mum

Mother receiving birthday prayers from children

Birthday prayers for your mum are a simple but powerful way to give back a little of the love your mum has always shown.

As Nike, 51, puts it: “I don’t ask for much, but when my children pray for me, I feel fulfilled. My spirit prays for them too.”

These prayers will help you say what truly matters to her.

Mum, may this new year bring you peace, happiness, and everything your heart desires. You deserve nothing less.

May the Lord continue to strengthen you, Mummy. I pray this new year brings you peace that surpasses all understanding, joy that never runs dry, and rest from every battle you’ve fought for us.

God, thank you for blessing me with a mother like this. May her days be long, her health be strong, and her heart be light with laughter.

Mummy, as you’ve watered others with your love, advice, and prayers, may God water you richly this year. You deserve the very best, and I pray heaven delivers it.

May Allah (SWT) bless you with good health, long life, and continued joy. Happy birthday, dearest mum.

As you celebrate another year, may God’s grace surround you like a shield and His love uplift your spirit.

Momsi, I pray that this year brings new beginnings and answers to the silent prayers of your heart.

May your new age bring abundant rizq, barakah in all you do, and unshakable peace. Ameen.

Heavenly Father, thank You for my mother’s life. May you continue to protect her, bless her, and reward her sacrifices.

Ya Allah, grant my mum strength in her body, peace in her home, and light in her heart. Make her life easy and beautiful, Ameen.

Happy birthday to the one who taught me to be strong and kind. May you always be surrounded by people and things that bring you joy.

May God continue to crown you with honour, robe you in peace, and saturate your life with divine favour.

Mummy, I ask Allah to elevate you in rank, forgive your shortcomings, and make your path smooth in both worlds.

This year, may every day bring new blessings, answered prayers, and moments that make your heart full.

You’ve spent your life lighting the way for others. Now may life bring you light, warmth, and direction in return.

Heavenly Father, bless my mother richly. May her heart never grow weary, and her days never lack Your presence.

May the Almighty continue to preserve you, provide for you, and protect you in ways only He can.

Today and always, may your soul be nourished with gratitude, your body filled with health, and your life surrounded by love.

O Allah, just as my mum has always been a source of comfort and mercy to others, let her always find comfort and mercy in You. Ameen.

May joy be your portion, love be your inheritance, and peace follow you into every new chapter.

Lord, thank You for the gift of my mother. Let her years be long, her burdens be light, and her heart forever hopeful.

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Love Life is a Zikoko weekly series about love, relationships, situationships, entanglements and everything in between.

*Godwin (21) and *Thompson (22) matched on Tinder while Godwin was visiting Thompson’s city for a few days. On this week’s Love Life, they share how one spontaneous meetup turned into back‑to‑back visits, why they’ve decided to take things slow as their connection deepens and how intimacy isn’t clouding their judgment.

If you want to share your own Love Life story, fill out this form.

What’s your earliest memory of each other?

Godwin: It was on Tinder, in April 2025. I was in his city to celebrate a milestone with a friend.

I got on the app to see what was happening, and we matched each other. We didn’t talk a lot on the app. We had a formal introduction, and I asked if he wanted to link up.

Thompson: We decided to meet up, and he offered to visit. I hastily made my way to the grocery store to buy water and some refreshments. Somehow, he managed to locate me at the store and patiently waited for me to finish my purchase. Then we headed to my place.

Godwin: I’d seen his pictures on the app, and I recognised him when I spotted him at a grocery store close to his place.

Sweet. What happened when you got home?

Thompson: We spent the entire time talking about random topics and playing Ludo. I couldn’t get over the fact that he kept beating me at the game.

Godwin: 5-1, if I remember correctly. He was pretty salty about the defeat because I wouldn’t stop taunting him.

Thompson: We also talked about our experiences in school and individual lives beyond academia, including the modest jobs we take to earn a small income, and our thoughts on relationships. He mentioned having been in a relationship, whereas I’d only navigated situationships.

Godwin: We connected well for people just meeting for the first time. Thompson appeared open-minded, and he was able to hold mentally stimulating conversations.

Thompson: As the day drew to a close, he left my place. But he missed my delightful company and returned later to spend the night. I’m indeed a charming presence to be around.

Wait. You spent the first night together?

Godwin: Well, he appeared downcast when I told him I was leaving. However, I couldn’t stay back at that particular time because I had to attend to some personal business. But I suggested returning later to spend the night with him, and he happily agreed.

Thompson: We also got intimate on the first night.

Must be nice. So, what happened next?

Godwin: I left the next day, and we continued texting on WhatsApp until I visited him the following week.

Thompson had to leave the next day due to personal reasons. I had also had classes, but he was nice enough to wait till I returned.

Later, I saw him off to the bus stop where he hitched a ride back to his place. After that day, we spent the next couple of days keeping in touch. The communication was pretty good — late-night calls, nonstop texting, and just filling each other in on how we spent our day and all that.

Soon enough, Godwin said he’d love to spend time with me again, scheduled a visit and spent four days at my place. The visit could have ran longer, but I had to make a quick trip back home.

Curious. Had anyone professed feelings to the other at this point?

Godwin: We entertained those talks, but neither one of us wanted to rush into any. Like he said, we’ve been the constant in each other’s lives in the short that we’ve been together. I know everything that’s happening in Thompson’s life just as he knows about whatever I’m up to.

Thompson: It’s all been baby steps for me.

Right. Thompson, Godwin mentioned he was in a relationship. Did you ever ask why he was out and about again?

Thompson: He told me he had broken up, but I don’t remember if he got to telling me why. However, I figured he must have recovered from whatever happened in that relationship, which explained why he was out in the market again.

Godwin: The truth is, before we met, I wasn’t looking to date. I was considering a fling with him and nothing serious. But that changed along the way. Like I said earlier, we’re being intentional about not going full throttle.

During one of our earliest conversations, Thompson said he was confused about what he was feeling, and I recall teasing him about what I had done to him.

I’ve also been unsure about where this is going, but most of the uncertainty has been from him, which is understandable, considering he’s never been in a relationship.

Thompson: Relationships come with a lot. It’s hard to wrap my head around the definition of relationships or what they should look like in this era. I’ve always known that when the time comes, I’m not just gonna jump into one. There are a number of things at stake, so I need to take my time.

What things?

Thompson: Commitment, time and emotional vulnerability. A relationship isn’t just all mouth. If I do get into one, I want to have all the time in the world for my partner. Currently, I’m navigating school, building my business, and handling life in general…I’m not certain I have as much time as I’d love to give.

There’s also the commitment bit; it takes a lot of work and intention to be with one person and stick with them. I also don’t like being vulnerable, talk more of emotional vulnerability. It’s hard to come to terms with the reality of having to put my heart into another’s hands. I need to be 100% sure before I make that leap.

And finally, I’m pretty sensitive. I notice everything, and it makes me scared of uncertainties or change; people change as it’s a constant phenomenon.

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Is Godwin aware of any of these things?

Godwin: Actually, no. It’s funny because this is the first I’m hearing of all these. He once told me of his fears about queer relationships being one sided, and that was when we decided to take baby steps.

Right. So, how do you feel about his current reservations?

Godwin: My thoughts are aligned with his. I was raised in a homophobic environment, and even though my parents showed me love, I knew I needed more. So, I decided to find my own people — people I could trust, open up to, and feel completely at ease around. People I don’t have to hide around. For now, I’m fine knowing Thompson is that person.

Neat. Have you been able to tell if this is a fling or something serious?

Godwin: That’s the question we’re trying to figure out — how to tell the difference between a fling and genuine love. But what I’ve realised is that you don’t always know from the start. You have to give it a chance. Love is something you grow into; it doesn’t show up fully formed.

Thompson: I don’t think sex can hinder or limit what we’re both trying to build. If we eventually build it, intimacy will be a part of the picture regardless.

You don’t think it blurs the lines?

Godwin: I feel like sex is the spice of a relationship. I’m not a sex freak or anything, but deriving joy and satisfaction with each other is one step to being committed. It makes no sense that you want to date someone and seek sexual pleasure elsewhere.

Thompson: I feel like everyone knows what they’re doing. I think we’d know within ourselves if it’s blurring the line.

How?

Thompson: Let’s say Person A meets someone and they end up having sex. If there’s no real connection beyond that, they’ll know deep down — it’ll be clear that sex is all there is.

It’s the same way someone might date a person just because they’re rich. Deep inside, you know it’s not love — you’re just attracted to comfort. And if the other person is smart, they’ll eventually realise that what you love isn’t them, but their money.

Right. How would you define your relationship right now?

Thompson: We’re still in the preliminary phase of our relationship, akin to the courtship period preceding marriage. We share a close friendship. However, I don’t see the need for any immediate actions. Time alone is sufficient, as it will naturally unfold everything.

Godwin: I agree. Time reveals all. We’re doing great right now, and I believe things will get better.

What would you say is the best thing about being with each other?

Thompson: His communication skills, empathy and curiosity. Godwin is also open-minded and quite the optimist. I really like that about him.

Godwin: He’s a jovial person. I like the way he laughs and shouts when he’s excited or when a juicy gist is brewing. He’s also as communicative, empathetic and open-minded as I am.

Sweet. On a scale of 1-10, how would you rate your love life?

Thompson: I’ll give us a 6.

We’re still in the early stage of whatever this is. There’s still a lot to learn, unlearn, and relearn. I understand that no one is perfect when it comes to things like this, so I’m open to both doing our best and hoping everything turns out just as we want it.

Godwin: I’ll go a notch higher and give us a 7. I’m not entirely sure why, but this is what my instincts suggest. I agree that there’s a lot to overcome, but generally, I’m happy with the progress we have made together.

If you want to share your own Love Life story, fill out this form.

In Nigeria, the first day of the month isn’t complete without a “Happy new month!” message or broadcast. Whether it’s a quick WhatsApp status update, a romantic message to bae, or a heartfelt prayer to your family, sending happy new month messages is how we remind each other that we’re still here, still rooting for one another, and still expecting better days.

So if you’re searching for the perfect happy new month messages, wishes, or prayers to share, we’ve curated over 200 options — sweet, funny, professional, and spiritual — to help you start the month on the right note.

Simple Happy New Month Messages

A middle aged Nigerian woman smiling at happy new month messages on her phone

Sometimes, you just want to keep your happy new month messages short and sweet while making people in your life know that you care about them.

These simple happy new month messages are perfect for sending hope, good vibes, and positivity.

Happy new month! Wishing you peace, clarity, and good news in the days ahead.

New month, new chances. Make the most of them.

Here’s to small wins, soft days, and kind people. Happy new month.

I hope this month brings you less stress and more reasons to smile.

I hope this month brings you less stress and more reasons to smile.

Don’t overthink it. Just take it one day at a time this month.

Happy new month to you! Wishing you a month where you feel supported, inspired, and filled with a quiet sense of contentment.

Enjoy the journey of this new month. May it bring you moments of calm, reasons for gratitude, and a touch of magic along the way.

Good vibes for May! Hoping this month brings you clarity, comfort, and the simple joys that make life sweet. Happy new month!

Have a wonderful month. May it be filled with warmth, understanding, and small moments of happiness that make a big difference.

Love you dearly, and happy new month.

March forward with a joyful heart, knowing that blessings abound around you. Have a truly magnificent March.

You’ve made it this far — don’t forget to be proud of that. Happy new month.

Look who made it to yet another month this year. Here’s wishing you all the goodness that comes with it.

Here’s to another month of love, laughter, and unforgettable memories with the one I love. Happy new month, my darling.

May the days of this month bring you rewards, and may you receive success in all your endeavours. Happy new month to you and yours.

I’m rooting for you this month. Always.

Wishing you a beautiful month ahead, my love. May it be as bright and beautiful as your smile.

Fresh month. Clean slate. Go easy on yourself.

You’re still here. That alone is worth something. Happy new month.

When others say there is a casting down, this month you shall enjoy God’s lifting and grace. Happy new month.

May this month leave you with pleasant memories that will last a lifetime. Happy new month.

With perseverance and hope, August will be a month of remarkable achievements and endless possibilities. Happy new month, fam.

Let go of what was, embrace what is, and look forward to what could be. Wishing you a refreshing and fulfilling new month.

If you haven’t found what you wanted, don’t worry. This May, you’ve got a fresh start to make your desires come true. Happy new month, fam.

Every month brings new good things, and I hope this one brings lots of them. Happy new month, my friend.

May this month be a time of growth, progress, and fulfillment for you. Happy new month.

A new month is here. It’s time to plant new seeds of hope, dreams, and aspirations. Happy new month.

May babies are excited, and so should you be. Happy new month.

A new month means that we are growing older, but also wiser. Happy new month, everyone.

Happy new month! Wishing you a month filled with little joys that brighten your days and a sense of peace that stays with you.

A new month unfolds. May it bring you fresh perspectives, kind encounters, and moments that make you smile from the inside out. Happy April!

Hoping this month wraps you in warmth, guides you gently, and brings you closer to what makes your heart happy. Happy new month!

With the start of this new month, may you find renewed strength, discover unexpected blessings, and feel a sense of hopeful anticipation. Happy new month!

Happy new month! Here’s to embracing new possibilities with open hearts and finding beauty in the everyday moments this month offers.

Romantic Happy New Month Messages for Your Love

A young Nigerian man smiling at happy new month messages on his phone

The best kind of happy new month messages are the ones that makes the love of your life blush while reading it.

Whether you’re in a long-distance relationship or lying next to them as you type, these new month love messages will melt their heart.

Happy new month, baby. No matter how the month goes, you have me completely.

Another month with you, and my heart still races like it’s the very first day. Here’s to more of that fire, my love. Happy new month.

This new month holds the promise of deeper connections, stolen moments, and a love that intensifies with every passing day. You are my everything.

With each new month, my soul recognises yours even more profoundly. Let this one be filled with an intimacy that words can barely touch. Happy new month, my heart.

This month, I crave the intensity of your gaze, the depth of your touch, and the unbreakable bond that ties us together. You are my fierce love. Happy new month.

A new month arrives, and all I desire is to lose myself further in the labyrinth of your love. It’s a beautiful obsession. Happy new month, my darling.

Happy new month, my love. I pray this month gives you rest in the places you’ve been fighting silently. You don’t always say when things are heavy, but I see it. I feel it. And I’m with you through it. May this new season soften the hard edges and remind you that you’re not alone. I love you, and I’m so proud of the person you’re becoming.

You are meant for greatness, and I hope you never forget that as we usher in May. Happy new month, lover.

As we step into this new month, I want you to know that you’re my calm in chaos, my safest place. You’ve held me down even on days when I didn’t know what I needed. This month, I pray we continue to grow in patience, laughter, and understanding. No matter what comes, you and I are still a team, one that doesn’t give up easily.

It’s a new month, and I still choose you. I choose your laugh, your mind, your quiet support, and your loud encouragement. I pray this month gives us more time to be present with each other, more joy in the little things, and more reasons to stay thankful. You’re my person. And I’ll keep choosing you, over and over.

This month, I’m praying for more softness around you, more reasons to smile from your chest. May every morning meet you with peace, and every night remind you that you’re deeply loved — not just for what you do, but for who you are when you’re doing nothing. You’ve made my life better just by being in it.

Let this month be a testament to the powerful and unwavering connection we share, a love that burns bright and consumes me entirely. Happy new month, my love.

Each new month with you feels like diving into an ocean of emotion — vast, deep, and utterly intoxicating. Here’s to another plunge. Happy new month.

This month, may our souls speak volumes in the silences, and may our passion ignite with every shared breath. You are the fire within me. Happy new month.

As this new month begins, know that my love for you is a constant, an intense flame that only grows stronger with time. Happy new month, my beloved.

Another month to explore the depths of our connection, to unravel the mysteries of our hearts, and to be consumed by the intensity of our love. Happy new month, my soulmate.

Another month with you feels like another page in a story I never want to end. Thank you for choosing me through my overthinking, my doubts, and my flaws. This month, I want to love you better, listen more, hold you tighter, and remind you every single day that your heart is safe with me.

Your voice, your laugh, your heart. I’m thankful I get to love all of it for another month.

This month, I want more late-night calls, more soft conversations, and more of your face in my camera roll.

It’s a new month, and I still haven’t gotten over you. I don’t plan to.

Loving you has been my favourite thing all year. Let’s do it again this month.

I hope this month is kind to you. But even if it isn’t, I will be.

Let’s enter this month hand in hand, emotionally and literally. I’m not going anywhere.

Every new month with you feels like the beginning of something worth holding onto.

Here’s to more laughter, fewer arguments, and better sleep when we’re not mad at each other.

We might not have it all figured out, but I still choose you this month. And next. And the one after that.

To the one who holds my heart — as this new month unfolds, I wish for us a tapestry of shared laughter, tender moments, and dreams we chase hand in hand. You make every day brighter. Happy new month.

My love, with the dawn of this new month, my heart feels renewed with the promise of more time with you. May our days be filled with the simple magic of your presence and the profound beauty of our love. Happy new month.

Every new month with you feels like a fresh adventure, my dearest. I’m excited to see what beautiful memories we’ll create together in this one. You are my everything. Happy new month.

The love of my life, as this month begins, my wish is for our bond to grow even stronger, our laughter to ring even louder, and our hearts to beat even closer. You are my home. Happy new month.

My precious lover, each new month with you is a reminder of how lucky I am. May this one be filled with moments that take our breath away and deepen the incredible love we share. Happy new month.

Darling, with the start of this new month, I’m filled with gratitude for your presence in my life. May our days be woven with affection, support, and the kind of intimacy that nourishes our souls. Happy new month.

My love, this new month feels full of possibility — just like our love. I’m looking forward to every shared smile, every whispered secret, and every moment we hold close. Happy new month.

To the one I cherish more than words can say, may this new month bring us closer, ignite our passions, and remind us of the beautiful and unique connection we share. You are my world. Happy new month.

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ALSO READ: 200+ Happy Sunday Messages, Wishes and Prayers to Share with Loved Ones

Happy New Month Messages for Your Friends

A young Nigerian man in his kitchen about to pick up his phone-happy new month messages

You and your friends survived another month? That calls for premium gist, plenty laughter, and of course, chaotic happy new month messages.

From petty to playful, these funny new month messages are perfect for dropping in the group chat or subtly subbing your bestie.

Happy new month, my dear! May your account balance finally match your taste.

May this month favour you the way you’ve favoured me — in gist, food, and emotional support.

New month, same best friend. Please, don’t change — you’re already my favourite human.
I hope this month brings you clearer skin, steady peace, and no calls from people you blocked.

Guess what? It’s a brand new month, ripe for the taking. May it surprise you with delightful moments and set the stage for even greater things. Enjoy every bit!

To my amazing friend, I pray this month brings you the clarity you seek and the strength to chase your dreams relentlessly. Onwards and upwards!

Picture this: a whole month of fresh starts and exciting possibilities. May yours be filled with laughter, good company, and all the things that make you smile.

Hey you. Imagine a whole month of fresh starts and exciting possibilities unfolding just for you. May it be filled with laughter, good company, and all the things that make you genuinely happy.

Hey! Just wanted to say happy new month! Seriously hoping this one brings you a big ol’ dose of whatever makes your soul happy. You deserve it!

New month alert! I’ve got a good feeling about this one for you. Sending you all the positive energy for things to click into place and for some seriously good stuff to come your way. What adventures are we getting into this month?

To more voice notes, shared memes, and random check-ins. I love doing life with you.

If the month gets tough, remember you’re tougher. And if you forget, I’ll remind you.

No pressure this month. Do your best. Drink water. Call me if you need to cry or overthink.

Happy new month! May you not fall for anybody without sense.

I don’t know what this month holds, but I know you’ll handle it like the star you are.

Happy new month, my friend. May this month not meet you where last month left you. May you find healing in the places that still ache and laughter that doesn’t feel forced. I pray you stop carrying battles that aren’t yours to fight. And I hope you’re reminded — daily — that you don’t have to be strong all the time. You’re allowed to rest. You’re allowed to be cared for too.

This month, I want you to take care of yourself the way you take care of others. You give so much without asking for anything in return. I pray you finally get poured into without having to beg for it. And if the world forgets how incredible you are, I won’t. Not today. Not ever.

You’ve been nothing short of consistent, even when things have been unpredictable. I know you’re carrying a lot, and I just want this new month to bring ease to your life. May things align. May surprises come in the form of relief. And may you feel deeply seen — not just for what you do, but for who you are.

I’m thankful for your friendship, your voice notes that make me laugh, your calls when I’m low, and the random texts that remind me I’m not doing life alone. This month, I hope you feel the same kind of love you constantly give out. Happy new month, and thank you for being real.

May this month be proof that you’re allowed to start again. That it’s okay not to have everything figured out. That even small progress is still progress. And that sometimes, the greatest act of strength is staying soft in a world that keeps trying to harden you.

Happy New Month Messages for Your Family

A young Nigerian couple smiling at their phone-happy new month messages

Family is everything — even when they’re asking when you’ll marry or sending chain prayers on WhatsApp.

These happy new month messages for your family will help you show appreciation, love, and prayerful energy to the people who’ve known you longest.

Happy new month to the people I call home. I may not always say it, but I’m deeply thankful for every sacrifice, every silent prayer, and every way you show up for me. I pray this month brings you peace that stays, health that holds, and laughter that fills our home again. Whatever this month brings, we’ll carry it together — like we always do.

Hey Auntie, may this new month surround you with the same warmth and care you so readily give to others. May you feel cherished and supported. Happy new month!

Thinking of you all as this new month begins. May it be a time of growth, happiness, and an abundance of love within our family circle. Happy new month!

Wishing my incredible family a month where every day is a step forward in joy, peace, and togetherness. Happy new month!

May this new month be a reminder of the beautiful tapestry we weave together as a family, filled with love, understanding, and unwavering support. Happy new month!

Hey little bro! It’s another whole new month to play and grow! May your days be filled with sunshine, laughter, and all the wonderful things that make you happy. Happy new month!

As this new month begins, remember how capable and loved you are. May it bring you renewed hope and the courage to pursue your goals. Happy new month!

To my parents and siblings — may this new month bring each of us into seasons that are kind and rewarding. May our plans succeed, and our steps be ordered. I pray our family never lacks joy, and that even in moments of disagreement, love will always win.

This month, I pray that God strengthens every weak place in our family — the parts we don’t talk about, the stress that keeps piling up, the decisions that weigh heavy. May we experience renewal in our spirits and ease in our daily lives. We may not be perfect, but we are still blessed.

Even in silence, I know we carry each other. I pray this new month brings more laughter to our family group chats, more stories to share at dinner, and fewer reasons to worry. We’ll keep growing, learning, and loving. That’s all I ask.

I know the last few months have been a little hard for us as a family. But this month, I choose hope. I believe there’s more in store for us — more good days, more answered prayers, more reasons to thank God. And I’m praying that this month gives us just that.

Happy new month, Mum. Thank you for everything you are. I’m praying for your peace and health this month.

Dad, I hope this new month brings you moments of rest, joy, and long walks without worry.

To my siblings: I know we annoy each other, but I love you all fiercely. Happy new month.

May this month bring laughter to our home and ease to our hearts.

As we enter a new month, I want to remind you how much you mean to me. Here’s to another couple of weeks filled with love and happiness with you by my side.

Hey fam, as we start this month, I want you to be proud of how you’ve been handling these past months — the silent battles you fought, the moments you had to humble yourself, wipe your own tears, and pat yourself on the back. You’ve made it this far and are more than ready for the months ahead. Happy new month.

Happy new month to the people I’ve known the longest. May we continue to grow in love and understanding.

I’m grateful for this family — flaws and all. Here’s to better days ahead.

To my cousin/brother/sister: I’m always in your corner. Let’s keep cheering each other on this month.

May this month restore everything we didn’t even know we lost. Amen.

Wishing you peace, health, and good memories this month. Family first, always.

New month, same prayers: that we stay safe, stay close, and stay thankful.

Dad, I know I don’t always say this out loud, but I admire your strength, your quiet sacrifices, your stubborn hope. This month, I pray for more ease in your life and less worry in your heart. You deserve a new month that comes with light, not weight.

Family isn’t perfect, but it’s home. And I pray this new month brings our home more laughter, less tension, and more moments we’ll actually remember with smiles. Whatever the past held, let this new month come with softness and forgiveness.

Professional Happy New Month Messages

A middle aged Nigerian man holding a phone inside his office-happy new month messages

Happy new month messages to your bosses or colleagues can do wonders for your office reputation and career progression if you get it right.

Whether you’re messaging your boss, mentor, colleagues or a new client, these professional happy new month wishes strike the perfect balance between respectful and warm.

Wishing you a new month filled with purposeful work and rewarding progress. May each day bring you closer to the goals you’ve been quietly working toward. I’m rooting for your success — and praying for your peace, too.

Happy new month. I truly admire how you carry yourself — with grace, intention, and a strong work ethic. This month, I hope your efforts lead to meaningful results and that you find moments to rest even in the hustle.

As this new month begins, I pray your work brings you fulfilment, your decisions lead to growth, and your relationships open doors that match your purpose. Thank you for the value you consistently add.

Here’s to a month of strategic wins, clearer direction, and the kind of calm that makes you even more effective. Your consistency doesn’t go unnoticed, and I hope this month rewards it fully.

I hope this new month comes with fresh inspiration, clarity in your plans, and the right people to help you bring those plans to life. Keep showing up — your impact matters more than you know.

Wishing you a productive and fulfilling month ahead. Thank you for always showing up with excellence.

Happy new month. May this season bring clarity to your goals and ease to your process.

It’s always a pleasure learning from you. I hope this new month brings more growth your way.

Here’s to new opportunities, stronger collaborations, and greater achievements.

Wishing you fresh energy, smart wins, and strategic rest this month.

Whatever I am today, you are the reason behind it. Thank you for being there as my mentor through all my challenges. Wishing you a very happy new month.

On the occasion of the new month, I extend my warm greetings to the mentor who has been there for me through every up and down. Wishing you a blessed and joyful month.

Dear Mentor, you are not just my senior — you are my guide and inspiration. As the new month begins, I wish you and your family peace, health, and happiness.

Dear Sir, thank you for your support and guidance, which have helped me grow and perform better. May God shower His blessings on you and your family this new month and gift you a season full of joy and success. Happy new month.

Thank you for all your cooperation and guidance over the months. Dearest Sir, I extend warm wishes to you and your family. May all your desires be fulfilled and may this new month bring you closer to your dreams.

The past year has shown us that you’re one of the greatest mentors anyone could ask for. Thank you for making work easier just by being understanding and kind. Happy new month!

You are truly an inspiration. Thank you for guiding the team through the toughest times and being the best lead ever. May this month bring you progress, joy, and rest. God bless you. Happy new month!

I feel so blessed to know you. You’re one of the most intelligent people I’ve met, and it’s an honor to have you in my professional journey. Wishing you and your family the very best. Happy new month!

Happy new month. I look forward to everything we’ll build and learn together in this new season.

I appreciate the leadership and guidance you bring to the table. Wishing you a successful month ahead.

To more meaningful work and fewer unnecessary meetings this month. Cheers to progress and clarity.

Thank you for being an inspiring part of my professional journey. Wishing you a rewarding and impactful new month.

Let’s keep pushing, refining, and delivering. Happy new month!

Dear Sir, as we begin this new month, I’m grateful for your continued guidance and wish you a fulfilling and successful period.

Wishing you a productive month ahead, Ma. May your leadership continue to inspire and drive meaningful results. Happy new month.

Happy new month, Sir. As the month unfolds, I wish you continued success, clarity in your decisions, and impactful leadership.

Happy New Month Prayers

When words aren’t enough, prayers do the job. There’s nothing like a well-worded prayer to make someone feel seen and spiritually recharged, especially at the start of a new month.

“I send happy new month messages and wishes to my mum and aunties every first day of the month. If I skip it, they’ll call to ask if they’ve offended me. LOL,” Kenny, 28, shares.

These happy new month prayers — both Christian and Muslim — are filled with faith, favour and blessings. Perfect for your family group chat, your spiritual friends or anyone who needs a divine reminder that this new month will be better than the last.

May this new month carry you into new levels of favour. May the doors you knock on open with ease. Where others struggle, may you walk in with peace. And where you’ve been delayed, may grace move things forward for your good. Amen.

This new month, I pray God steadies your heart, strengthens your hands, and shows up for you in ways you didn’t even know to ask for. You will not lack direction. You will not be stranded. You will not be empty. In Jesus’ name.

Ya Allah, in this new month, we ask for ease in our daily hustle, peace in our families, and light in our decisions. May our steps be guided, our hearts protected, and our efforts blessed from start to finish. Ameen.

No sickness, no accident, no disappointment. This month, your prayer requests will turn into testimonies, and your haters will have no choice but to congratulate you by force!

I pray that this new month will be good to you. May your skin glow, your bank account grow, and your joy overflow. No stories that touch — only soft life and breakthrough!

This month, you won’t hear “God when?” You will hear “God did it!” May this new beginning come with back-to-back testimonies that will make even your village people proud.

May this month bring you testimonies that sound like fiction. May your name be mentioned for opportunities you didn’t chase. May every seed you’ve sown — in people, in work, in prayer — begin to sprout this month. Amen.

This month, may you move without fear. May God give you the courage to pursue what scares you, wisdom to know what’s not yours, and peace that covers you like a second skin. You are not alone. Never have been. Never will be.

May this month bring you closer to all that’s good, pure, and meant for you. Amen.

This new month, I pray that your heart stays soft, your path stays clear, and your joy never runs dry.

May Allah ease your affairs, bless your efforts, and protect you from what is not meant for you. Happy new month!

I pray this month brings you open doors, quiet strength, and divine guidance.

May you be met with mercy where you expect judgment, and grace where you least deserve it.

May this be the month where everything finally starts to make sense. In Jesus’ name.

Ya Allah, grant us light in our decisions, peace in our homes, and barakah in our work. Ameen.

You will not be stranded. You will not lack helpers. You will not labour in vain. Amen.

This new month, may God surprise you with answers you didn’t even know you were waiting for.

May every delay turn to favour, and every setback to a setup. Happy new month, and God bless.

May you have a month devoid of worry, stress, and sorrow. Conceive greatness and achieve it, because nothing shall be impossible for you this month. Have a beautiful and bountiful month of September.

There is a purpose you are created to achieve. God has prepared you to achieve a special assignment that only you can fulfill. You have a gap to fill. Fear not. Pursue that goal with all your heart — it’s achievable. Happy new month, my love.

May Allah shower His infinite mercy upon you this new month and guide you on the straight path.

Happy new month! May Allah bless you with health, wealth, and happiness according to His perfect will.

May this new month bring abundant baraka (blessings) from Allah into every aspect of your life.

I pray that Allah grants you and your family good health, prosperity, and success in your endeavours.

Happy new month! May the peace and blessings of Allah be upon you throughout this month and beyond.

This month, I pray for divine upliftment and blessings upon you and your family. May the beauty of the Lord our God shine upon you, and may He establish the works of your hands. May His mercy, favour, and grace locate you and your loved ones. Happy new month to you and your family.

I’m thankful we are alive to witness the start of this new month. It is my fervent prayer that we’ll witness countless more. Let’s make the best of this month. Know deep within you that you deserve nothing less than the best. Happy new month, fam.

May your hard work be fruitful, your labour yield a bountiful harvest, and your mouth be filled with laughter. Wishing you a super month of wins in all areas. Happy new month.

Happy New Month Messages for WhatsApp Status

Listen, not everyone deserves a DM, and that’s why Zuckerberg invented WhatsApp status.

These happy new month messages are perfect for catching your contacts’ attention without having to DM everyone individually.

New month, fresh energy. Let’s do this.

This month owes you joy. Collect it with your full chest.

Dear (Month): please be soft, kind, and generous.

Happy new month to everyone seeing this. May your silent prayers be answered.

We’re not asking for too much this month — just peace of mind, good food, and consistent credit alerts.

It’s a new month. Protect your peace. Guard your heart. Move with sense.

Your pace is valid. Don’t compare. Just keep moving.

New month, new day, new date, new chapter, new page, new wishes! Welcome, (Month’s Name). #HappyNewMonth

No matter how hard the past is, you can always begin again. Happy new month.

May your new month be filled with no regrets or letdowns, only breathtaking moments and immeasurable happiness.

A new month is like a blank book. The pen is in your hands. It’s your chance to write a beautiful story for yourself. Happy new month.

Hey you, it’s a new month again. May it be filled with laughter and happiness that extends to all the months to come.

Dare to be different this month. Dare to stand out. Dare to be the one with a voice. Dare to shine! Happy new month!

As this new month begins, I hope you let go of your burdens and begin a fresh chapter filled with peace, love, and everything nice.

Here’s to a month of possibilities, overcoming challenges, and all-round success.

The best thing about a new month is that it’s a clean slate — 30 chances to do something great.

I wish you a happy new month filled with prosperity, happiness, love, and good health.

May all that you do this month be productive and successful. Happy new month to you.

Sending good vibes only. Block bad energy and overthinking at the gate.

If you’re reading this, I hope this month treats you better than the last one did.

Grateful for another chance to try again. Happy new month, fam.

Goodbye, (Old Month). Hello, new beginnings! Wishing everyone a month filled with growth and joy. Happy new month!

Sending good vibes into the new month to all my contacts!

Cheers to a fresh start and a month full of amazing moments. Happy new month!

Here’s to the quiet promise of a new month, filled with untold possibilities and the chance for positive change. Happy new month!

May this new month be a reminder of our resilience and the power of new beginnings. Wishing you strength and joy this (Month). Happy new month!

Finding peace in the turning of the month. May (Month) bring moments of reflection and genuine happiness to us all. Happy new month.

Embracing the fresh start that a new month offers. May it be filled with meaningful connections and heartfelt moments. Happy new month!

Just like that, a brand new chapter. Let’s make it a bestseller. Happy new month!

This new month, let’s focus on progress over perfection and celebrate every small victory. Wishing you a fulfilling (Month)! Happy new month!

With the dawn of (Month), may we all find renewed inspiration and the determination to make the most of each day. Happy new month!

READ THIS NEXT: Love Messages: How to Write The Perfect One & 250 Messages From Real Nigerians

Since getting into that relationship, your replies are slower, you’re never available, and somehow, every conversation circles back to “Babe.” It’s almost as if the sun and moon revolve around them.

You don’t mean to be a bad friend, but things are different, and someone has to tell you.

5 Signs You’re Becoming a Part-Time Friend

You might not notice, but your friends have. If you’re guilty of even one of these, it’s time for a wake-up call. We spoke to five Nigerians who have been on the receiving end, and here’s what they had to say.

1. Your Availability Depends on Babe

Before, your bestie got real-time updates about your life — chaotic voice notes about your daily breakdowns, the full gist. Now? You only remember them when Babe is busy. And when they text you? All they get are dry responses like ‘lmao’ and ‘that’s crazy.’

Lolu*, 29, told Zikoko about how her childhood friendship gradually faded. “We used to talk every day about everything,” she said. “But once she started dating, things slowly changed. At first, it was very subtle — missed calls, short replies. It became obvious when I found myself carrying our conversations. I understood she was in a new phase of life, but that didn’t make it less painful.”

2. You Keep Cancelling Plans

Your bestie plans a link-up, and you’re excited until Babe wants to do something that same day. Next thing, you’re texting, “Can we reschedule?” (How many times in a row?)

It might seem like nothing to you, but to your friend, it screams, “You don’t matter.”

Osaz*, 25, told Zikoko how her roommate-turned-bestie made her feel invisible. “The little things we used to do just vanished because she never had time,” she shared. “I hated that every together activity became a lone activity.”

And when you do manage to show up, you’re one “my babe said” away from disappearing mid-hangout.

3. Every Conversation Is About Your Relationship

Your friend: “Work has been stressful.”

You: “OMG, same! My babe made me food yesterday to make me feel better sha.”

Somehow, every conversation becomes a TED Talk about your relationship. Not that you shouldn’t be excited about love, but must every story have your babe as the main character?

Tunde*, 27, was over it with his roommate of six years. “I honestly felt like we didn’t have a friendship anymore,” he told Zikoko. “It was frustrating that we couldn’t talk about anything else.”

4. You’ve Stopped Being Present

You finally link up, but are you really there? Physically, yes. Emotionally? You’re deep in conversation with Babe on WhatsApp while your friend is baring their soul. They’re probably wondering, Who is this, and what have they done with my friend?

Tolu*, 30, knows the pain of feeling alone in the presence of someone who’s supposed to care. “I would tell him things, and he just wouldn’t remember. It used to get on my nerves a lot. But the last straw was when I lost someone close to me, and he barely asked how I was doing.”

5. You Only Remember Them When You Need To Rant

The moment you and Babe argue? Your friend becomes your emergency therapist. You rant, get their advice (which you never follow), and even worse? You go back to Babe and download all the negative things your friend said while defending you. It’s giving betrayal.

Chisom*, 25, experienced this firsthand. “One time, her boyfriend slipped and said something to me that I had told her in confidence,” she said. “I couldn’t even find it in me to be annoyed.” If this is you, you’re not just a bad friend. You’re wicked.

We Asked A Relationship Coach How To Fix It

If this sounds like your current friendship dynamic, you’ve got a problem. And if you don’t address it, you might lose a good one.

We asked relationship counsellor Adesuwa Isénérè, founder of Heartdrops with Suess, how to fix things before it’s too late.

1. Own Up to It

If you’ve ticked every box, the first step is to admit it.

“Start with a sincere apology,” Adesuwa shares. “Acknowledge their feelings without making excuses. You can’t truly understand how they feel because you are not them. You don’t see things from their perspective. Reassure them that you’re ready to repair the relationship and ask how you can make amends. Be intentional about expressing your love and consistently show up for them. That’s how trust is rebuilt.”

2. Make Time (Intentionally)

If you have time for dates, you can make time for your bestie, too. Adesuwa explains, “It’s natural to be engrossed in the excitement of a new relationship. I mean, romance is sweet. However, please maintain your existing friendships. Everyone has a role to play in your life, so abandoning your friends is cheating yourself out of a wholesome experience.”

She adds, “Schedule regular catch-ups with your friends and involve your partner in group activities. It’s your responsibility to foster inclusion. They’re all important to you and should be treated as such. Besides, a well-balanced social life would improve your romantic relationship.”

3. When You’re Confronted, Actually Listen

If your friend calls you out for being distant, don’t get defensive.

“They could have pulled back or walked away, but they chose to address it because they still care,” Adesuwa stresses. Listen actively, validate their feelings, and apologise for hurting them. Then discuss how you both can improve communication and make sure they feel valued moving forward.”

And If And If You’re the One Feeling Left Out…

Let your friend know how you feel. Use “I” statements so it doesn’t sound like an attack. You’re not enemies. “It’s both of you against the problem,” says Adesuwa. “Conflicts are normal in relationships, but hidden resentment isn’t. Talking about how you feel can clear up misunderstandings and help your friendship grow stronger.”

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*Folarin, 20, thought he’d found his person in someone who felt like home — soft, grounded, and good for his restless mind. But what started as a sweet, slow-building love story ended with trust issues, emotional distance, and a quiet breakup he’s still trying to recover from.

In this story, he shares how a regret note changed everything, why he couldn’t ignore her growing closeness to a new queer friend, and the haunting fear that he might never connect that deeply with anyone again.

This is Folarin’s story, as told to Adeyinka

Erica and I started as friends with benefits; it wasn’t planned. I met her at one of our school’s restaurants, and we just clicked. Our conversations flowed easily, and we bonded quickly. Still, at the time, I had no interest in being in a relationship. We were in our first year, and I was focused on school and building a tech career. I didn’t think much about love.

So when things turned physical between us, it was just what it was — two people enjoying each other. I wasn’t ready to be anyone’s boyfriend.

But as time passed, we grew closer. Our conversations deepened, the emotional bond got stronger, and I stopped seeing Erica as just someone I was hooking up with. She started pulling back from the party lifestyle, too, which I’d come to notice during the early days of knowing her. And even though I hadn’t planned to date her, I couldn’t imagine not having her around. So I decided to take that step. We made it official.

It was good. Peaceful. We were best friends, always talking, watching each other grow, sharing plans and fears. For someone like me, who tends to overthink everything, she was the one person who could make the noise in my head go quiet. Just being around her made life feel less heavy.

Then, something shifted.

About seven months into the relationship, we resumed school after a break. I was genuinely excited to see my babe. Sadly, that feeling didn’t last long. One day while we were together, I went through her phone — not to look for anything, just casually. However, I opened her Notes app and saw something that looked like a “regret” journal. I was confused and asked her about it.

When I did, she hesitated, then eventually told me what happened. A week before I asked her out, she went to a party with friends, got drunk, and had a threesome with her friend and a random guy. She said she barely remembered the details. But I didn’t need more. I already knew it had happened, and it was even crazier to me because it involved some random guy.

What shattered me wasn’t just that it happened. It was the timing. We weren’t official yet, but that period deeply connected us. I trusted her blindly. I genuinely thought I was the only one. And I’d built this picture of her in my mind — someone different. That note ruined the picture.

Still, I tried to forgive her. I pushed it aside, and we reconnected in no time. We really liked each other, and I tend to forget the bad times when things feel good again. She also put in the effort. And for a while, it seemed to work.

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Then, about a week after the regret note incident, she told me she was going to another party. I didn’t say anything, but in my mind, I was like “Another party again?” I think that was when the trust between us shattered entirely, and I started checking out of the relationship for my mental health.

Her lifestyle was just one I couldn’t handle. She had friends who partied a lot, stayed over at apartments, and loved that whole scene. I wasn’t comfortable with it, and I told her. But every time I complained, she’d wave my concerns off, saying it was just harmless fun with friends.

In the middle of all this chaos between us, she made a new friend — a girl who drank, smoked, and partied even more. What made it worse for me was that the girl was queer. And my girlfriend had once admitted she had same-sex attraction, even though she said she was suppressing it. So I knew — under the right conditions, something could happen. I could feel it.

I raised my concerns with her again, and she dismissed them. She said I was just being insecure.

That was the second time I checked out of the relationship. It happened about a month after the first. At that point, I just felt stupid, like I was the only one taking this seriously.

ALSO READ: I’m Tired of Being the Girl Old Men Fantasise About

When I finally told her I wanted to break up, she didn’t take it lightly. She tried hard to make me stay. She promised to change and said I was overthinking things. But at that point, I had already started losing my mind trying to hold it all together. I had to walk away.

At first, I felt free and lighter. But that peace didn’t last.

Very quickly, I realised how much stability she’d brought into my life. I’m naturally restless — I worry a lot about my future, about everything. But being around Erica brought ease. We were best friends. She made life feel a little less chaotic. And suddenly, that was gone.

Even now, four months later, I still think about her every day. I’ve tried moving on. I’ve landed a tech job, met new people, but nothing seems to stick. I lose interest quickly. It’s like my heart checks out before I even get to know anyone. And then the questions creep in — what if I never find someone like her again? What if that was the deepest connection I’ll ever feel?

I’ve had the urge to reach out. So many times. But I don’t. I stalk her socials sometimes. I see the same patterns — partying, getting drunk, staying over at apartments, still hanging out with that queer friend. And I know she’ll say she’s just “distracting herself,” but I know that’s just who she is now.

She reached out once, not to talk, but to ask for her friend’s hoodie. I knew what that was. She doesn’t need the hoodie. She just wanted a reason to talk.

Sometimes I think, if I hadn’t seen that note… if she hadn’t picked up the lifestyle she called “fun”… maybe we’d still be together.

But maybe that’s the thing. You don’t always lose people because you stop loving them; sometimes, they lose you. Sometimes, you lose them because loving them makes you lose yourself.

And that’s the part I’m still trying to recover from.

READ THIS TOO: My Husband Married Me Because God Promised Him A Virgin

Amanda* (22) has spent most of her life being pursued by much older men. While some may see it as flattery, she shares why it’s anything but that, and how it has affected her emotionally, mentally and romantically.

This is Amanda’s story, as told to Mofiyinfoluwa

The first time I became conscious of this, I was in JSS3. A man I greeted often in my neighbourhood offered to drop me off at home. I didn’t think much of it until he asked me if I had ever had sex. Then he asked me if I would like to have sex with him. I was 12 at the time, and he was a grown man — the father of the boy I had a crush on at the time, to be precise. I was shocked and confused. But I just told him to drop me off and never told anyone.

I only drew more attention from then on. When I was 14, my neighbour’s husband, a man in his 30s, started making advances at me. It got very uncomfortable because whenever we were alone, he was very physically suggestive. I was very close to his wife, so I told her. Instead of confronting her husband, she turned her back on me and stopped talking to me completely. It hurt because it then seemed like I was the one who wanted to steal her man, like I was some kind of threat, when I wasn’t interested. It made me feel ashamed for something I didn’t even do.

I kept getting advances, most of which I ignored. For a long time, I thought it was normal or that it was just a coincidence that men more than twice my age always approached me. But when I got to university, I started to see the pattern. It was always older men. And it wasn’t flattering, it was disturbing.

It wasn’t long until I met a man in church, I’ll call him Mr. Bayo. I was 19 at the time; he was in his late 30s.

He told me I was the kind of woman he wanted to marry. I made it clear to him that I was very young, still in school, and not interested in that kind of relationship. But he said he would wait for me to graduate and marry me. We talked for a while, but he started to make me feel weird. Without asking me how I felt, he just started calling me his girlfriend. Then he started calling me his wife.

He wanted me to cook for him, have sex with him, and take care of him. He assumed this ownership over me that I never agreed to. He’d send me money I didn’t ask for and say things like, “You won’t even let me touch you, and you’re an adult.” It was manipulative and controlling.

Thankfully, since I schooled in a different state from where we lived, I was mostly away and never went to his house to do all the things he wanted. I kept making excuses, and eventually, I had to block him.

Then I met a politician. This one was the most obsessed of them all. He’d show up at my hostel randomly, uninvited. Most times, I had to lie that I wasn’t around just to get him to leave. Around that period, while I was actively avoiding him, I got a strange call around midnight. When I picked up, a babalawo was blowing incantations into the phone. I was scared out of my mind that night and couldn’t sleep. To this day, I can’t prove it, but deep down, I believe it had something to do with him.

Not long after, he posted photos from his child’s naming ceremony on WhatsApp. That’s how I found out he was married with a child. That was it for me. I blocked all three of his numbers. He kept calling me with different ones. I had to keep blocking and blocking. It took God for him to stop.

After school, I thought getting a job would mean a fresh start and more professional relationships. But one of my bosses, who is over 60 and married, started making subtle moves.

Then one day, when we were alone in the boardroom, he said plainly, “If you scratch my back, I’ll scratch yours.” He said he wanted all of me and could “take care of me.” I did the math, and he’s 39 years older. I’ve just avoided him ever since. That’s all I can do for now because I’m not about to lose my job over that.

Now? I’m currently talking to a divorcee in his 40s. He seems kind and listens to me. I don’t even really like him like that, but I’m considering giving it a chance, just to see what it would be like to finally cave in.

But deep down, I know I don’t want this. What I really want is simple. I just want a relationship with someone close to my age. Ideally, not more than two years older than me. It has been my dream to find someone I can grow with and share experiences with, without age and power imbalances. The closest I’ve ever come to having that was one talking stage that didn’t become anything more.

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But it almost feels like my destiny. It’s like I’m trapped in this cycle of always being approached by men twice or three times my age, and I can’t run from it.

People say it’s because I’m “mature for my age” and “have a wifely appeal.” But I’m tired. I don’t want to be anyone’s fantasy. I just want to be a normal young woman who can fall in love freely.

I pray that I don’t end up with an old man when it’s time to settle down. Because I never asked for this life.

Moyin* (22) was mentally and physically exhausted during their final year at university, riddled with anxiety and overwhelmed by the mounting pressure to do well. But after an LSD trip, a moment of sudden clarity made them decide to drop out of school to find peace.

Trigger warning: substance use, anxiety, depression

This is Moyin’s story as told to Betty

In 2023, after months of constant anxiety about my life, my worsening school results and my self-worth, a friend sent me some tabs of LSD as a gift because I’d mentioned wanting to experiment. It was my first time using the drug, and the experience was… intense.

Before this, I was trying to navigate everything that I’d been avoiding for months: my dating habits, my erratic relationship with my mother, the rest of my family, myself and my sense of self-worth. I was especially coming to terms with how I tied my worth to how well I was doing at school and work.

I’ve read about how LSD influences brain activity, and looking back, something about that trip made it hard to deny that I was very, very tired, burnt out and depressed.

I was moving around with so much anxiety in my bones. I remember leaving my hostel after my final 300-level papers and feeling lighter, only for the anxiety to return threefold the next semester when it was time to start my project.

After the trip, I couldn’t ignore my body anymore. I couldn’t pretend any longer that it made sense to sit in a class, take assignments and get anxious about them. I’d already missed three exams the previous school year because of anxiety, and I didn’t carry much hope for this one.

I was diagnosed with anxiety in 2019 and was getting treatment, but it didn’t feel like my meds were working. My brain constantly felt like it was deep-fried.

So, I skipped my first 400-level papers after missing weeks of classes and assignments. I scrounged up the courage to tell my dad I needed a breather from school in the meantime. He took it very well. He wasn’t upset. He said he’d known something was wrong for a while and was waiting for me to admit that I’d had enough.

So, I took a year off — a very difficult year — to let myself be depressed and feel everything. I used that time away from academic pressure to fully sit with my sadness, ask the hard questions I had been avoiding, and begin to process it all.

Now, I’m less attached to school and what it says about me. I’m learning to come to terms with my disability and that my life might not always follow the path that I want. I also discovered that I work better around people I like.

I’ve come back to retake my final year as a much better student. I’m doing more assignments and asking for help. One of my biggest problems has always been shame — the shame of needing help, the shame of not being the best student in the class or at least one of the top three.

I understand now that getting an education from a Nigerian university isn’t the measure of how far I’ll go in life. Shame isn’t necessary, but it’s normal to feel it. I don’t need to beat myself up for anything I feel. I definitely think I wouldn’t have had the time and space I needed to come to these realisations if I hadn’t taken that break.

It was heartbreaking watching my friends and set mates graduate without me. I considered so many options; I even thought of transferring to another university and repeating a year for a chance at a better grade, but I’m satisfied with waiting for a year till I was ready and able to do the work needed to graduate.

My first semester exams were great — my first exams in over a year. I’ve moved to a new place where my friends can visit, and I’m finding peace in my own time.

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Disclaimer: This story is a personal account and not an endorsement of drug use. Psychedelic experiences vary widely, and LSD can have serious mental health risks.

If you or someone you know is struggling with anxiety, depression or considering substance abuse, these resources can help: https://rehabs.africa/location/nigeria/ and https://www.opencounseling.com/lagos/lagos

If you enjoyed reading this story, you’ll also enjoy: I Keep My Binge Eating A Secret From Everyone

The topic of how young Nigerians navigate romantic relationships with their earnings is a minefield of hot takes. In Love Currency, we get into what relationships across income brackets look like in different cities.

How long have you been with your partner?

I’ve been with my husband, Hosea, since 2018, so that’s six years. We got married in 2023.

How did you and Hosea meet?

We matched on Tinder, but we didn’t live in the same city. Tinder shows you people who live farther away if you don’t match with people close to you. I was also using Tinder Premium, so I could even meet people outside Nigeria.

Hosea and I texted for five months until I moved to his city to start my master’s degree. He was in his final year of medical school. Our first date was at the cinema, and our second date was at his place. He asked me to be his girlfriend during the second date, and I said yes.

You were both students?

Yes, but I had a thriving online thrift business that brought me around ₦100k in profits monthly. I was even considerably better off financially, as he couldn’t work much for money due to the demanding nature of medical school. He occasionally had a project management gig with someone that paid him ₦200k – ₦400k about twice a year, but that was all.

Although I earned more, Hosea took care of 100% of our date expenses and the bills when I visited. He’d even still give me transport money on top.

In 2020, I finished my master’s degree and returned home. Hosea also moved to Abuja for his housemanship, and we transitioned into a long-distance relationship.

What was that like?

It was tough. The lockdown happened, and we didn’t see each other for a year. Then we started to grow apart and broke up for about seven months. While we were broken up, I got into another relationship and almost got married. But he was too wealthy for me, and I broke it off.

Did you say, “too wealthy”?

I know it sounds funny, but I like having financial autonomy. Having my own money makes me feel safe, like I can make decisions for myself. This other guy gave me so many gifts: plots of land, gold, a car, and even a house. He wanted to get married immediately, but the financial gap between us was too wide.

I didn’t know what he did for money —we didn’t even talk about things like that, and it didn’t feel like our marriage would be a partnership. I wouldn’t be able to make any decision because he had everything. I just didn’t feel relaxed. In the end, I had a talk with him and we ended the engagement.

Around the same time, Hosea came back and asked that we give it another try, so we got back together in 2021. He started talking about marriage, too, but I wasn’t ready.

Any reason why?

I just wanted to take my time. In 2022, I got a job that paid ₦370k/month as a pharmaceutical rep. I’d expanded my thrift business to wholesale, and it brought in an additional ₦400k/month. Hosea was working at a private hospital in Abuja and earned ₦700k/month.

In December 2022, I visited my parents and invited Hosea over. That’s how he told my dad he wanted to come and marry me. In summary, wedding planning started, and we got married in 2023.

How did you both handle wedding expenses?

We initially budgeted ₦4m – ₦5m for the wedding, then Hosea brought out only ₦1m and said it was his savings. I was surprised because where was the remaining money supposed to come from? Why would you use your life savings for a wedding?

We had to cut down on a lot of things, but my parents ended up covering the bulk of the expenses, as they wanted a big celebration for their first daughter. I only paid for my makeup. Looking back, I should’ve asked Hosea a lot more questions about his plans for the wedding expenses, but I didn’t think much of it.

After the wedding, we realised ₦2.1m from the money people sprayed us, and Hosea used it to rent an apartment and buy a mattress for us in Abuja. Up until then, he’d been living with his sibling’s family.

I still lived and worked in my city while he set up the place. So, we did long-distance and frequent visits for the first few months of our marriage until I joined him in 2024.

How did your homes run in those first few months?

Our finances were still very separate. I’ve always been a big saver, so I didn’t need to ask him for money. I’m always keeping my money in the bank or tying it down in gold jewellery.

But Hosea’s own is to give money to the church. I didn’t know that at the time, though. All I knew was he liked handling his expenses himself and that he had a provider mindset. When he was setting up our place, I had to deliberately chip in because he wouldn’t ask me for anything.

I resigned in January 2024 and moved to Abuja to join him. I was also pregnant, so it had become stressful to run my business and work. I had to stop the business when I moved because Abuja isn’t close to places like Onitsha, where I can travel to buy cloth bales.

Then, I realised just how different our money habits were when we started living together.

How different?

First of all, he had so many things taking his money. When Hosea receives his salary, he sends money to his mum, then his sister and his dad. Then he pays tithe, removes church offerings, fuel and other utility bills. At the end of the day, he only has about ₦150k left from ₦700k. So, we have to manage that for food.

I’ve had to chip in several times to supplement whatever he dropped for food. I had ₦8m in my savings when I moved in, so I was happy to buy food and do things around the house without asking him.

I told Hosea about my savings, and we decided to open a joint savings account. I put ₦5m in the account and sent random amounts every month. Hosea, on his part, sent ₦100k monthly there. We had a baby on the way, so we wanted to be prepared. He also told me he had a personal ₦150k/month savings.

This brings me to the second thing I noticed about his money habits, which is the one I mentioned earlier about giving so much money to the church. I realised how serious it was when I had my baby, and he said there was no money to pay the hospital bills. My dad had to support the ₦700k bill because my baby was put in intensive care, and Hosea kept complaining about money. It was so embarrassing.

After we were discharged, I sat him down to ask why he acted like that. That’s how my husband said he’d actually cleared out all our savings to sew a seed in church months before.

Wait. The whole thing?

The whole thing, including my ₦5m. He said he was led by the spirit. He even showed me the transaction receipt. I cried so much to my mum because I wasn’t sure what else to do. I’d trusted him with our finances, and he did that. I knew he was more serious with church than me — I don’t even go to church — but I didn’t know it extended to finances. Maybe if I’d been following him to church, I might have known earlier. He actually cleared every single naira.

I’m so sorry about that. How did you move past that?

At first, I was angry and heartbroken, but I had mixed feelings. I was angry at Hosea, but was I supposed to stay angry at Jesus? I believe Nigerian pastors are scammers, but there wasn’t much I could do. However, the joint account is dead and buried.

For two months after the incident, I made sure Hosea handed over his salary so I could oversee the expenses. I still ran every decision by him, but I made the payments. Then I started feeling bad that he wasn’t handling the money he worked for.

Besides, we couldn’t do that in the long term. If I can’t trust my partner with finances, it’ll impact our marriage negatively. So, we returned to our usual arrangement on the condition that he’d make money available for me, the house and our baby when we needed it. He can spend the rest on church as he likes, as long as he provides for us.

Oh. How’s that working so far?

It’s going well. He gives me a personal ₦50k allowance monthly, then ₦100k for food and provisions and ₦70k for the baby’s needs. Sometimes, I still supplement with some of the savings I manage to gather. I just have to make it work because I know he won’t stop giving to the church. He clearly told me he didn’t regret giving away our life savings, he just regrets not telling me. That’s just who he is.

A few months ago, I really needed to change my phone, and he said he only had ₦100k. As a good wife, I collected it and said I’d add money to it. That same evening, they sold anointed handkerchiefs at church, and he bought two at ₦80k on the spot.

So, for him, it’s church first. He even pays the pastor ₦20k/month — a pastor who has a private jet. But I don’t want to think about that. I wish he spent less in church, but it’s a no-go area for him, and he won’t compromise on it. He says he’s doing it for our future, so I just have to trust him. As long as he’s performing his responsibilities at home, he can continue his giving.

You mentioned savings earlier. Is this from your allowance?

I occasionally get small contracts to supply drinks at events. Those come like once every two months, and I make at least ₦80k on each job.

I’ve been thinking of starting a business, but I haven’t come up with anything yet. I also make some money from sports betting. The gambling isn’t regular, though. When I need some money, I’ll put ₦200k on 1.1 odds, run the bet for five straight days and make ₦20k each day. I try not to do more than that so I don’t lose money.

I hardly lose because I’m a very careful gambler. Sometimes, when my husband is very broke, he gives me money and tells me to do my sports betting magic.

So, that’s where my savings come from. I’ve bled through most of it and only have ₦700k currently. In January, I put my husband on a savings app and make sure he saves ₦30k/month since he always complains about being broke.

Is there room in the budget for dates and romance stuff?

Oh yes. Besides our different approaches to money, my husband is a really good man, and our marriage is great. Sometimes, he takes locum jobs and uses the income to plan dates. For this year’s Valentine’s Day, we had a really nice outing that cost him about ₦200k. In December 2024, we had a three-day family getaway in another city.

He also regularly buys me stuff. Just recently, he got me six new dresses. I’m hoping I can save enough money to take us on a trip to Ghana later this year. I figure it might cost up to ₦2m. If it doesn’t work out, we might just go to a resort in Lagos instead.

What’s your ideal financial future as a couple?

Japa. I’ve been trying to convince Hosea to take the PLAB exams or any medical exam that can help us relocate, but he’s worried he might fail. I still have the gold, plots of land, and house from my ex-boyfriend, which should give us at least ₦40m if we sell them.

That should be more than enough to cover the exams and relocation costs, but Hosea thinks it’ll be a waste of time and money we could’ve given the church if he fails. I’m just hoping he’s open to it soon.

Interested in talking about how money moves in your relationship? If yes, click here.

*Names have been changed for the sake of anonymity.

NEXT READ: The Lagos Housewife Trying to Make the Best of Her ₦100k Allowance

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Short Birthday Wishes for Your Mum

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Long Birthday Wishes for Your Mum

Touching Birthday Wishes for Your Mum

Funny Birthday Wishes for Your Mum

Birthday Prayers for Your Mum

What’s your earliest memory of each other?

Sweet. What happened when you got home?

Wait. You spent the first night together?

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Must be nice. So, what happened next?

Curious. Had anyone professed feelings to the other at this point?

Right. Thompson, Godwin mentioned he was in a relationship. Did you ever ask why he was out and about again?

What things?

Is Godwin aware of any of these things?

Right. So, how do you feel about his current reservations?

Neat. Have you been able to tell if this is a fling or something serious?

You don’t think it blurs the lines?

How?

Right. How would you define your relationship right now?

What would you say is the best thing about being with each other?

Sweet. On a scale of 1-10, how would you rate your love life?

Table of contents

Simple Happy New Month Messages

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Romantic Happy New Month Messages for Your Love

Happy New Month Messages for Your Friends

Happy New Month Messages for Your Family

Professional Happy New Month Messages

Happy New Month Prayers

Happy New Month Messages for WhatsApp Status

5 Signs You’re Becoming a Part-Time Friend

1. Your Availability Depends on Babe

2. You Keep Cancelling Plans

3. Every Conversation Is About Your Relationship

4. You’ve Stopped Being Present

5. You Only Remember Them When You Need To Rant

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We Asked A Relationship Coach How To Fix It

1. Own Up to It

2. Make Time (Intentionally)

3. When You’re Confronted, Actually Listen

And If And If You’re the One Feeling Left Out…

This is Folarin’s story, as told to Adeyinka

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This is Amanda’s story, as told to Mofiyinfoluwa

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This is Moyin’s story as told to Betty

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How long have you been with your partner?

How did you and Hosea meet?

You were both students?

What was that like?

Did you say, “too wealthy”?

Any reason why?

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How did you both handle wedding expenses?

How did your homes run in those first few months?

How different?

Wait. The whole thing?

I’m so sorry about that. How did you move past that?

Oh. How’s that working so far?

You mentioned savings earlier. Is this from your allowance?

Is there room in the budget for dates and romance stuff?

What’s your ideal financial future as a couple?