While there is a lot of information on how to prevent getting Coronavirus, there is not a lot of help regarding what to do if you suspect that you are infected. If we are being honest, as Nigerians living in Nigeria, there’s only so much you can do to avoid getting infected because we lack the infrastructure to properly self-isolate. This means that we are fucked.
So, to cover all bases, your friends at Zikoko created a handy guide on how to prepare in case you get infected.
First, the Coronavirus is not a death sentence if properly managed. That knowledge is the first step to beating this virus. This is because it helps you not to panic and to follow the instructions below.
So, what do I need to know?
The virus causes nasty breathing problems. Think of something more uncomfortable than cold and catarrh. So, think of all your cold symptoms such as sniffling, headache, temperature, etc. Now is the time to stock up on paracetamol, wipes for cleaning your nose, some honey and lemon. All these help with relieving the symptoms that usually present with this illness. If you are experiencing high body temperature, take paracetamol over any form of “strong” painkiller because it is the safest for now.
Water, e no get enemy.
If you suspect that you are infected you want to be drinking a lot of water. Drink plenty of water because it plays a huge role in regulating body temperature along with transporting essential nutrients round the body. While staying hydrated can’t protect you against getting infected, it can help with recovery.
Rest, rest, rest!
This is not the time to be outside. You should not leave your house even if you start to feel better because you may be infectious. Isolate at home for the next fourteen days and avoid contact with elderly people. Also, ask your family members to leave supplies outside and keep their distance from you. Better to be safe than sorry. It is also important that the rest of the family members stay quarantined for the next 14 days as they may also be infected.
Don’t panic.
To avoid overwhelming healthcare workers, don’t go to the hospital UNLESS you have difficulty breathing or a very high (39 degrees Celsius) fever which is unmanaged by medications. Healthy adults with no previous complications and underlying diseases have bounced back with rest and home medications.
However, if you show any of the above signs, call the Nigerian Center for Disease Control on their toll-free numbers for more information on what to do next. This is because leaving your house to go to a hospital without proper protocol can result in more infections thus spreading the virus more.
If you have any pre-existing condition, you should talk to your healthcare provider on how they would like you to proceed if you get sick.
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With the reported cases of Coronavirus in Nigeria rising, it’s time for us to play our parts in preventing further spread. So, we’ve curated 10 Nigerian songs that should help you remember just how serious this entire ordeal is.
1. Asa’s “Fire On The Mountain”
Even though this song is over a decade old, it feels quite apt right now. There is clearly “Fire On The Mountain”, and a lot of Nigerians don’t seem to be on the run.
2. Burna Boy’s “Collateral Damage”
Unless more Nigerians start taking this virus seriously, it’s inevitable that many people will end up being “Collateral Damage” in the wake of someone else’s stupidity.
3. Runtown’s “International Badman Killa”
With the virus currently ravaging over 190 countries, racking up a death toll of about 14,000, it’s safe to say that COVID-19 is the real “International Badman Killa”.
4. Davido’s “Risky”
Since you can’t know for sure where anyone has been or who they’ve touched, it’s best to follow Davido’s instruction and assume that everyone’s body is potentially “Risky”.
5. Wizkid’s “Fever”
The most common symptom of the virus is a “Fever”. If you feel hot to touch on your chest and back, there’s no need to panic. Just follow these simple instructions.
6. Naira Marley’s “Soapy”
Right now, the safest sexual partner is yourself. So, while “Soapy” may have been too crass for some when it first dropped, it’s currently the masturbation anthem we need.
7. Mr Eazi’s “Miss You Bad”
As soon as we all start self-isolating, “Miss You Bad” will feel even more poignant. Just make sure you check up on those you love during these stressful times.
8. Fireboy DML’s “Scatter”
With the number of reported cases in Nigeria rising on a daily basis, it should go without saying that any kind of party or social gathering should immediately “Scatter”.
9. DJ Neptune’s “Nobody”
One of the best Nigerian tracks out right now also happens to be the ideal anthem for social distancing. So, as the song says, we don’t want to see you with “Nobody”.
10. Odunsi’s “Better Days”
While it might feel like the entire world is coming to an end, it’s necessary to look forward to “Better Days”. If we don’t, we might all lose our collective minds.
With the reported cases of Coronavirus rising in Nigeria, it’s time for us to take self-isolation very seriously. So, in a bid to raise awareness while having a bit of fun, we’ve created a quiz that lets you know who you’ll self-isolate with.
Take to find out:
Every week, Zikoko seeks to understand how people move the Naira in and out of their lives. Some stories will be struggle-ish, others will be bougie. All the time, it’ll be revealing.
This week’s subject is a 30-year-old cleaner who’s doing everything from people’s laundry to housecleaning. Her dream is to one day become a tailor.
When did you first realise the importance of money?
I can’t remember much, but it has to be from when I was a teenager. You know, what did a child like me know beyond eating and sleeping.
If there’s anything I remember, it was when I first finished school and I wanted to continue my education.
You finished secondary school?
No o. It was my primary school I finished – I was about 14. I started asking my daddy about his plans for my secondary school, and he kept saying “next year, next year”. But because staying at home was making me think too much, I just went to look for a job.
Did you find one?
Yes. There was one woman I was helping to sell Agbo and gin. And my daddy now started shouting, “omo Muslim! You’re selling gin!”
I told him: when I wanted to continue school, what did you do? When I wanted to learn a trade, what did you give me?
What did he say when you said that?
He couldn’t say anything after that. One day, I called him and said, ah daddy, times have changed o. He asked me how and I said, these days no man will marry me unless I go to school.
That was when he showed some seriousness.
Did he eventually give you money?
No, hahaha. And I believe he had money, he just didn’t want to spend it on my education.
What was he doing for a living?
He owned a vulcanising workshop. As for me, I got a job as a maid somewhere.
How much did it pay?
₦3,000. I took my daddy along with me to the place. Then I told the woman not to pay me, but to give my daddy, so that whatever money I make for that year, I can use it to go to school.
One year later, I went to meet my daddy for my money and –
No no no no!
He spent all the money. He didn’t even keep one naira for me. All ₦36,000. That was when I just got angry and travelled to Lagos.
Where were you living?
Kwara.
So you just packed your things and said you were coming to Lagos?
No oh. I planned with one of my friends. She had already come to Lagos before. One day, after telling my mother, my friend and I came to Lagos.
But you know what happened?
What?
While we were on the way, my friend was crying inside the bus. When I asked her why she was crying, she said she hoped that we were not leaving one suffering in Kwara to go to come to another suffering in Lagos.
I later found out the real reason she was crying.
Why?
When we got to Lagos and we started working, her feet starting to swell. She started to spit.
Hayyy.
She was pregnant. And the work was affecting her, so she had to go back home. The day she left, both of us cried at the park. I cried till I could no longer see the bus.
I felt so alone. But me I came to Lagos to hustle.
Ehya, sorry.
Thank you. I started working with one woman selling rice and stew. All the Agbero at the bus stop, they all buy from her. Every day, she used to sell one and a half bags of rice. When market is slow, she’ll sell only one bag.
But I only worked with her for three months.
Why?
One day, she slapped me. And that was the day I said I wasn’t going to work again. Then I started selling pure water. I’d buy one bag at 50 then, and make 50 profit per bag. On days I wake up early and sell well, I can sell up to 12 bags.
I didn’t ask, where were you staying when you came to Lagos?
Someone I did work for, allowed me to stay in their compound. I clean the place regularly for them, and they just let me stay.
Like a small flat?
Oh no. It’s like a balcony at the back, but it’s covered. Sha, I started saving to buy a sewing machine, because it’s something I really wanted to do. By the time I was about 18 – I can’t remember again – I’d saved enough money from selling pure water, then I bought a sewing machine. I’d always wanted to learn how to sew.
Where did you keep it?
I actually travelled back to Kwara to buy the machine, because that’s where I wanted to start sewing. I came back to Lagos to raise more money, and when I travelled back to Kwara, the machine head had gone. My daddy said they stole, but I know he sold it.
What?!
When I bought that machine, it was like ₦8,000. Now, it is up to ₦40-something thousand.
That’s how I came back to Lagos, and I found a place to become an apprentice to learn to tailor. But because the tailoring wasn’t paying me much – like 300 per day – I now started helping people clean and wash.
There was a period I had to stop tailoring because I needed more money.
So you were still washing and cleaning?
Yes.
What are you doing these days?
I went back to finish tailoring and I just need money for freedom. I’m also washing and cleaning.
How much do you make in a week or a month?
Haha, how will I know? I just know that sometimes, work will come, sometimes work won’t come. For example, for two weeks, I might not get more than one or two jobs. From those ones, I can make ₦5,000 but another two weeks, and I’ll just get plenty of work.
I just know that in a day, from morning till night, I can spend up to ₦1,000 on food.
Everyday?
It depends on if there’s money o. If there’s no money, I can just buy whatever my money can buy and drink water.
The last ₦6,000 someone paid me for example, I spent ₦1,000 and took the remaining ₦5,000 to the bank.
You have a bank account?
Yes. I opened it in 2019. I’ve been saving because I want to rent a house.
How much have you saved now?
₦70,000. The place I want to get is one small room, for ₦120,000. There was one woman that I worked for. She saw me sad one day, and when I told her I was worried about getting a place, she gave me money. You want to know how much?
How much?
₦60,000.
Wow.
But do you now know what happened to that money?
What?
My daddy, he fell very sick. The doctor said all the smoking and agbo is what affected him. So when I travelled home last time, I spent a lot of money on him, and on my family.
How many siblings do you have?
We are seven. The two people before me died. That’s why things were hard for me because if they were alive, they would have supported me. Our last born now, all of us supported her, and she’s supposed to do NYSC now, but because of this corona thing that they’re saying, we don’t know when she will go.
Tell me what you know about coronavirus.
Ah, they sha said if we see anybody coughing, we should not go near them. We should also not go to parties or anywhere where there are crowds. They said no Church, no Mosque.
Good. But do you know that some people can have it, and there’ll be no signs?
Ah.
As I am, I might have it, and you won’t even know. I may not even know.
Ahhhhh. So it’s not only people that are coughing.
Yes. A person can have the virus in their body. They won’t even know, and they’ll be passing it around. It’s like how a person can have malaria, but the signs have not started showing.
Ahhhhhh.
A person who has it can talk now, and their saliva will touch something, and when someone like me touches it, my hand will carry it. If I now rub my eyes or touch my nose, I’ll catch it.
Ah! Ye! What type of evil thing is this? Is God punishing us?
I don’t know, but I know that if a Danfo conductor catches it, he’ll –
Ahhhh, he’ll just stand at the entrance of the bus and be spitting on people as he’s shouting! Ah! This thing is serious! Danfo! What about BRT?! God please protect us. So what are we going to do like this?
To stay at home is the best option.
And not even go anywhere? Where will people see money? Hunger will kill us. How much food will a person even have to keep? Where will people get money to buy all the food?
How much do you have saved?
₦70,000. It’s for my rent.
Take some of it, and use it to buy food that will last.
Sigh. Shebi they said they kept all the sick people in one place?
Look at it like this. A sick person enters a car, and the driver doesn’t know. And the sick person uses the hand that they’ve coughed on to touch somewhere in the car, and the driver touches it. The driver then goes to eat in a Buka. And the conductor now goes to eat in that Buka. And carries the virus because he touched the place the driver touched. Can you see?
Is God punishing us for our sins? What type of evil thing is this?
You need to be careful. Everybody needs to be careful.
This thing is scary oh.
Yes. Anyway, what is something you really want right now?
I really want to get a house. You know you can’t own things if you don’t own a house. I really want to get a house. Also, I want to go to an evening school. I believe if I’m going to be a good tailor, it’ll help a lot. But it is cancelled until after this corona. But I really want to go back to school and learn small again. And I want to do freedom from my Oga.
How much does apprenticeship freedom cost?
Everything will cost like ₦60,000. But I don’t want to touch my rent money.
How much money will you make right now that will be enough?
Ah, if a job will pay me ₦30,000 without moving about too much, that’d be a blessing.
So, what are you going to do now?
I can’t think of anything right now. Except for this coronavirus. And if you ask me right now, that what do I want to do and how do I want to do so that I won’t fall sick, you know what I’ll say?
I dunno. You tell me.
…
…
I really don’t know how I’m going to do it. I can only pray for God to have mercy.
*This interview happened in Yoruba. It has been translated and edited for clarity.
Upon request of readers, we added a payment link for people to donate to the subject of this story.
Update (5.15am, 30/03/2020): The sum ₦142,000 has been raised by you amazing people. She sends her gratitude, and thanks you for your kindness.
Check back every Monday at 9 am (WAT) for a peek into the Naira Life of everyday people. But, if you want to get the next story before everyone else, with extra sauce and ‘deleted scenes’, subscribe below. It only takes a minute.
Coronavirus is changing a lot of things. From work to travel to worship. I was wondering if some of this change could trickle down to email culture. Especially seeing as social distancing is the new rule.
Email culture can be is very passive-aggressive. With its innuendos and doublespeak galore. I was inspired by Ufuoma to see if we could try some of these email sign-offs since it now seems somehow to end an email with “warm” regards.
1) I like the sound of this.
Let everyone bear their father’s name.
2) Social distancing 101.
As far away as possible.
3) Please, let’s be guided.
Can’t be too careful on these streets.
4) Thoughtful.
Take care and be safe!
5) This one triggered me.
Because where are you rushing to?
6) More like sent from my couch.
Sent from boxers for remote work.
7) Wake me up when it’s all over.
But if the world was ending, you’d come over, right?
8) I agree.
2020 can you like…chill?
How much do you know about Coronavirus and precautions to take? Take this quiz to find out and also, share it with your friends and family!
With the reported cases of coronavirus slowly growing in Nigeria, people are becoming a lot more cautious. Unfortunately, a lot of out Nigerian parents are still not taking it seriously enough, and it is rightfully stressing us out.
1. When you first heard that older people are more at risk.
Hay God!
2. You, talking to your parents like they’re children:
See how the tables have turned.
3. You, begging them to just sit at home:
Pleaseeeeeeee.
4. When they send you another BC with fake news.
It’s time for you to delete WhatsApp.
5. When they call to tell you about a “cure for the virus”.
“Mummy, please, heat won’t do anything.”
6. When they refuse to take your warnings seriously.
Who is smiling with you?
7. When you see them carrying car key to leave the house.
Where do you think you’re going?
8. When you tell them not to go for any religious gatherings.
If you miss one Sunday you won’t die.
9. You, when they talk about God protecting them:
Great. Please, protect yourself too.
10. When you tell them not to have any visitors over.
If it’s important, they can call.
11. You, explaining social distancing to them:
You might as well be talking to a wall.
12. When they look at you like you’re being too dramatic.
See me see trouble.
13. You, after giving them yet another Coronavirus lecture:
I have tried, abeg.
Y’all, the age of Miss Carona is upon us. Like that Dr Alban song, she’s invited herself to dinner and won’t take no for an answer. Because of this, the general public has been advised to do all they can to make sure she doesn’t stay long i.e washing hands with soap and using hand sanitizer, social distancing, and self-isolation/quarantine. We’re here today to talk about that last part.
Self-isolation involves staying locked up at home to ensure you don’t get infected. Not leaving your house for days can feel like torture, so we’ve made a list of suggestions of stuff you can do to pass the time.
1) Exercise
YAS GAWD! Work those creaky joints and atrophied muscles by engaging in light or heavy workout sessions by yourself in your living space. There are plenty of equipment-free home workout routines on YouTube to choose from.
2) Let your reading habits return from war.
When was the last time you read a book from start to finish without taking a two-year break in between? This is the time to regain that sense of wonder (and the attention span) you had as a kid.
3) Finish learning that new language so the Duo Lingo bird can stop leaving you passive-aggressive messages.
The worst thing about this meme is that you can’t run. You’re in quarantine.
4) Get your diet in order.
Seeing as you’ll be home and will mostly be cooking your own meals, this is your chance to eat healthier stuff as opposed to the junk food that was easily available before judgement day happened.
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Brethren, because we’re currently in the age of Miss Corona, there’s news about her EVERYWHERE you turn. You’ve thought of tuning it out but won’t because you need to keep up with the recent developments. It’s exhausting. You’re exhausted. Chile, we get it. With that in mind, here are 5 funny Nigerian TV shows suggested by 5 Zikoko writers you can binge to take your mind off who’s coming to dinner (Miss Corona).
1) Assistant Madams(suggested by Daniel)
According to RedTV’s website, Assistant Madams chronicles the lives of three beautiful hustling ladies played by Sophie Alakija, Osas Ighodaro, and Tana Egbo-Adelana, who are hell-bent on living their best lives at any cost, one man at a time.
As Daniel already established in his episode of Zikoko’s “Quickie“, everything about this show is bad. The writing, acting, editing, sound mixing etc. And that, ladies & gents, is why he wants you to watch it. The show manages to achieve the rare feat of being so bad, it’s good. Trust him, y’all. He’s not wrong. There are 5 episodes currently available and you can watch them all on RedTV’s YouTube channel.
2) The Men’s Club(suggested by Boyin)
The Men’s Club stars Ayoola Ayolola, Etim Effiong, Enado Odigie, and Baaj Adebule as four friends who come together in sharing their highs and lows all the while being surrounded by their women, their businesses, and the hassles of their city.
A thing you should know is that The Men’s Club and Assistant Madams both exist in the same fictional universe. Watch this show and get your entire life. There are 2 seasons currently available to watch on RedTv’s YouTube channel.
3) Jennifa’s Diary (Suggested by Astor)
Jenifa’s Diary documents the life and hilarious hijinks of Jenifa (yep, the same one from the movie trilogy) after she drops out of university to become a hairdresser.
This show began in 2015 and somehow has 18 seasons already. Don’t let this scare you, though, because pretty much every episode is thigh-slappingly hilarious. It’s comedy at its purest form and if you don’t enjoy it, chile, you need help. You can watch all the available episodes on SCENEONETV’s YouTube channel.
4) Skinny Girl in Transit(Suggested by Toke)
Skinny Girl in Transit follows that life of an overweight girl named Tiwalade and her struggles to lose weight and find a man, triggered by her mother’s incessant complaints and emotional blackmailing.
It stars Abimbola Craig, Ngozi Nwosu, Sharon Ooja, Bisola Aiyelola, Ayoola Ayolola and a host of others. The 6th season began on the 14th of February 2020. All episodes are available on NdaniTV’s YouTube Channel.
5) The Johnsons(Suggested by Toheeb)
The Johnsons is a sitcom-style TV series which focuses on the eponymous family, the diverse traits of its many members, and how they cope with life in Lagos, Nigeria in relation to relatable social issues.
It stars Charles Inojie, Chinedu Ikedieze, Ada Ameh, Seun Adebajo Osigbesan, Kunle Bamtefa, and Samuel Ajibola. It airs on Africa Magic.
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It’s no news that miss Rona is in town. And part of the requirements of avoiding miss Rona’s wrath is social distancing. What this means is that if your company or industry can afford to, they have probably issued a work from home statement.
Alas, we all know we live in a peculiar place with peculiar problems (did someone at the back shout Nepa, Politicians, and Healthcare?). So, what do you need to effectively work from home and not lose your source of income?
Hop in.
It’s very important to continue the same morning rituals even when working from home.
Usual drag yourself out of bed – check.
Cry about adulting in the shower – check.
Wear cloth and spray perfume – check.
It’s crucial that even when you are working from home you maintain the same morning routine because this shifts your brain from rest mode to work mode. Also, getting a dedicated space which is not your bed or room to work from counts. These things help significantly boost your productivity.
Open a mini-filling station.
Three things are certain in life: Death, Taxes, and Nigeria disappointing you. The form it takes, in this case, is in the form of Nepa. It is just out of self-preservation to have copious amounts of petrol that can be safely stored on stand by. This is to make sure all your gadgets are sufficiently charged for work. To be fore-warned is to be fuel-armed.
Do what you have struggled to do with your Nigerian parents – Establish boundaries.
Because of the absence of traffic to remind you that you are going to work and re-remind you that you are done for the day, it’s easy to fall down a rabbit hole. This means spending more time working than you usually would. You can end up working from morning till the next day and ruining your already almost ruined work-life balance. Set an alarm for closing time and also buy a whistle. Once the alarm rings, blow the whistle like referees do to signal the end of a match. It’s important to establish a boundary and find balance.
Keep up with office gist.
Don’t let working out of the office stop you from hearing sweet gist. Since everyone is working from wherever that is not the office, there’s no chance for lunch banter and elevator gist. Fix this by keeping in touch via Slack, Zoom, or whatever channel you communicate with at work. Keeping in touch can help with isolation that comes from working alone. Also, don’t let remote work kill your office husband/wife romance.
Finally, say hi to your nosey neighbour.
Every morning, you dash out only to return late at night. Now is the time to get to know your neighbours who have probably been wondering why you think you are better than them. Take regular intervals from work to go outside and stretch and maybe say hi to your neighbours (If you shake them, wash your hands with soap and clean water oh). A change of scenery can help with the fatigue that comes from being in the house all day.
How prepared are you for the Coronavirus? Take this quiz to find out, and don’t forget to share it with people who need to see it.
Yesterday, we got information about a new case of Coronavirus in Nigeria. In addition, we also got the decision of the Nigerian Government on Covid-19 thanks to the meeting by the Presidential Task Force On Coronavirus. Part of this decision is a travel ban on countries with more than 1000 reported Covid-19 cases.
Govt. of Nigeria is restricting entry into the country for travellers from: China, Italy, Iran, South Korea, Spain, Japan, France, Germany, United States of America, Norway, United Kingdom, Netherlands & Switzerland
These are countries with > 1,000 cases domestically
Today, the Federal Ministry of Health just announced 5 new cases in addition to the previously discovered ones and here’s what we know about the latest development:
@Fmohnigeria has announced 5 new cases of #COVID19 in Nigeria bringing the total number confirmed cases in Nigeria to 8
All 5 cases had a travel history to the UK/USA
We urge Nigerians to remain calm as public health response activities are intensified across the country pic.twitter.com/yoKLHXoxhq
1) These are totally new cases independent of the previously reported ones.
They had a travel history to some of the banned countries on this list.
2) Risk assessment measures and contact tracing are ongoing.
Contact tracing means tracking everyone the infected person has been in touch with to reduce the risk of these people spreading the virus. Read more about it here.
3) The Nigerian Center For Disease Control will provide continuous updates and advice as they know more.
Don’t panic and don’t spread the wrong information.
So, while we await updates, let’s all remember to take the necessary precautions:
