Your Graphic Designer Has Your Name in a Calabash if You Say Any of These Things

June 15, 2022

Don’t get it twisted: Designers are annoying as fuck. They think they’re better than the rest of us because they know how to use simple Photoshop, and say words like “harmony” and “sans serif”. So don’t think this article is a list of things curated for you to take out of your vocabulary when talking to designers. Far from it. These are phrases and sentences to say to your annoying designer friends (or coworkers or enemies) if you want to piss them off. 

P.S.: I got this list from actual designers. I approached them pretending that I wanted to tell people not to say these words. Now, I’m weaponising their fears. 

Make it pop

Someone said, “Make it pop? Na pussy?” And it just reminded me of this video. 

It’s not giving

Say this to them and end it there. No extra feedback, nothing. Just look at it, say those three words and watch their entire day get absolutely ruined. But remember, they deserve it.

I’m a designer too, I can do it myself

When you say this, just duck behind something because they will attack you. 

Fix it. You’re the designer

You can throw in a little, “Do your job.”

I want to learn photoshop/figma

The fact that they don’t like people saying this shows that they’re proper haters. Like, you don’t want me to be a designer too? Why?

You should learn product design

Apparently, designers get asked if they do product design like three times day. Be the person that makes it four times. 

It’s just a small design. It shouldn’t cost much.

For maximum effect, you can use this one in combo with any of the above, most especially, “I’m a designer. I can do it myself”.

Is it not just Canva? Why are you wasting time? 

When your designer is taking more time than required to finish a task, simply berate them by saying the above words and watch them fall on their knees in agony. Works every time. 

My wife/cousin/(any random person) doesn’t like it

Even if you like the design, say someone else doesn’t like it and then proceed to not give a reason why. We’re turning you into a villain small small. 

Just do you


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