13 Questions Nigerian Parents Ask When You Say You’re Going To Visit A Friend

April 14, 2016

1. “Don’t you have your own house?”

See wahala.

2. “What are you going to do there?”

Armed robbery. What will I be going to do there before?

3. “Can’t they visit you?”

They have visited me. Oya?

4. “How many times have they come here?”

Chineke!

5. “Do we know them?”

What is it?

6. “Where do they stay?”

Why? Do you want to rent?

7. “Are they in your school?”

Jisos! Can I go already?

8. “What are they studying?”

You want to pay their school fees?

9. “Who are their parents?”

My God!

10. “Where are they from?”

Earth, I think.

11. “What do their parents do?”

Mummy oh!

12. “Are they born again?”

Am I Jesus?

13. “Which church do they attend?”

Na wa.

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