14 Things You’ll Find On Every Nigerian Mother’s Dressing Table

July 25, 2016

1. That cream she doesn’t want to accept has finished:

Mummy, let it go.

2. Those creams she only used once and never used again:

Why are they still there though?

3. The dusting powder that was more for you than her:

The answer to every skin condition known to man.

4. Her weave on’s best friend:

Always slacked, but they will never let it go.

5. Her anointing oil that is the answer to EVERYTHING:

Always there, just in case.

6. Her unofficial sewing kit:

The pain you feel when you open it expecting to actually see cookies.

7. Her matchy-matchy jewellery:

For her special Owambes.

8. Her all-purpose wig:

Always ready to give her that quick slay.

9. The reason that her wig has lasted so long:

Pink oil is every wigs fountain of youth.

10. That extra mirror she has even though the dressing table has one giant mirror:

WHY?

11. All the combs she has even though she only ever uses one:

When you’re not a hairdresser.

12. The brown powder that doesn’t even have to match her complexion:

They will still use it like that.

13. That tiny tray filled with drugs (by drugs, we mean paracetamol):

But look well because they are most likely expired.

14. Her infinite supply of cotton buds:

It’s always full.

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