If You’ve Ever Been A Hustling JJC In Lagos, This Is For You
Renmoney
September 21, 2016
Share this story
This post is sponsored by Hustle, brought to you by Africa Magic
1. When you graduate from school and realise your village is no longer your size.
“I was made for bigger things.”
2. So you pack your bags and move to Lagos.
As per the happening place in Lagos
3. How your mother prays for you when you’re about to leave home.
She will now bathe you with annointing oil.
4. How you shine teeth with everybody.
I have arrived oh!
5. When you’re nice to the conductor and he carries your change:
Na wa oh!
6. When you ask for cheap accommodation and they carry you to Sango-Ota
Kuku take me back to my village.
7. After Lagos agents have dealt with you:
Na wa oh!
8. When you find out how expensive food is:
“I like fasting anyway”.
9. When you meet your village brother and he ends up cheating you.
No loyalty in the jungle oh!
10. When your village people ask why you’ve been avoiding them.
I’m not coming home till I hammer!
11. When you just want to buy pure water but end up sleeping in traffic.
Na wa for this city!
12. When you close your eye in a danfo and wake up in Ikorodu.
AH!
13. After all the wahala, the most important thing you’ve learnt:
Never forget!
If you enjoyed this, then you’ll definitely love “Hustle”, an amazing new dramedy on Africa Magic Urban that follows the antics of Dayo, a JJC to the city of Lagos! Catch it on Africa Magic Urban 153 at 21:30 CAT (8.30pm Nigerian time) from October 3, 2016.
The subject of today’s Abroad Life went to the United States of America for school in 1979. He talks about leaving to get an education so that he could return for a better life, and meeting a completely different Nigeria when he returned in 1983. When did you decide that you wanted to leave Nigeria? […]
As told to Mariam I put a call out for women to tell me the things that affect their mental health most. In Ada’s* message, she said her parents found out she is queer. I was curious about how that played out and I asked more questions. Here’s what she told me: I am the […]
The Follow Come Earpiece is a very important phone accessory. Good music, great sound quality, but there is just one problem: it gets missing easily. Today on Interview With, Follow Come Earpiece explains what exactly is going on. Zikoko: Hello, it’s good to have you here. Follow Come Earpiece: Omo, you are welcome oh. Just […]
Fathers aren’t usually in the news for good things. From buying the wrong diaper sizes to forgetting birthdays, some men clearly need to do better as fathers. Still, there are some solid fathers out there, doing the work, both as men and as fathers. I spoke to 11 women about the best things their dads […]
Purity culture is usually a combination of religious and cultural beliefs that promote abstinence from sexual activities till marriage. These six Nigerian women share with us how they overcame purity culture. Yinka, 23 A lot of the guilt and shame I felt around sex and decency came from following Christianity. I was taught that I […]
2010 was a game-changing one for Nollywood, with our movies making serious cash and getting international acclaim. So, which of these hits released between 2010 and 2019 — from the pace-setting The Wedding Party to the divisive Trip To Jamaica — best suits your personality? Well, that’s what this quiz is here to answer:
Are you straight, gay, bisexual, pansexual or asexual? Well, we are willing to bet that this quiz knows. Just pick a few of your favourite things and we’ll reveal your sexual orientation. Give it a shot:
There are two types of people in Nigeria right now: those who are proud Marlians, and those who are still in denial about stanning the divisive star. So, for those who proudly wear the Marlian tag, we made a quiz to test how well you really know Naira Marley. If you get more than 6 […]
We already guessed how many people you’ve slept with, and y’all were out here denying the truth. Anyway, we won’t hold that against you. This time, however, we’ve created a quiz that predicts who you’ll sleep with next — so you can either prepare or try (unsuccessfully) to prevent it. So, take and see:
Last month, we thoughtfully made a quiz telling you guys exactly when you’ll marry, but some of you claimed that your spouse was nowhere to be found. Well, now we’ve created one that’ll tell you exactly who you’ll be dragging down that aisle. Take and start planning that wedding: 11 Quizzes For Nigerians Who Are […]
Your taste in music can say a lot about you, and this time, it’s going to reveal what you are like in a relationship. So, pick a few of your favourite Nigerian love songs, and we’ll let you know if you’re typically a distant, passionate or unbothered partner. Here you go:
Are you a Nigerian Student? Are you in a relationship with a fellow Nigerian student? If your answer to these questions is “yes”, then definitely understand these struggles stated below The roommate that does not understand privacy You have been telling Cynthia about how bae is coming over for some private time since the beginning […]
Phillipine movies usually follow a pattern that has become obvious and annoying. Consider this list a documentation of that annoyance by once loyal fans.
Forget Tunji and Daniella, if you’re wondering who your best friend is, it’s most definitely the phone you’re either reading this from or the phone that’s somewhere within your vision; we know this because you’re definitely a phone addict that gets a little impatient when you’re too far away from your phone. Okay, let’s not […]
Yes, Valentine’s Day is almost here. Love notes, chocolates, hampers, and everything that comes with it. But while everyone is being hit by cupid’s arrow, there are some people who don’t even feel the hype. If you’re one of them, then grab a seat at this table. 1. You, when you hear that Valentine is […]
In case you have not realised it, Nigerians have a PhD in lying. Multiple PhDs, even. And there are some people who are professors in the art of lying, but we will keep that conversation for another day. Anyway, here is a list of common lies Nigerians tell. Don’t lie, we know you must told […]
Anyone who grew up in a Nigerian household understands that the Saturday routine does not change. It is the same yesterday, today and forever. If you are a true Nigerian, then you’ll understand these pictures and their connection to Saturday mornings. 1. Morning devotion by 6:00 AM. In which your parents can slap you for […]
Growing up, Saturdays used to be fun thanks to Cadbury Nigeria and Silverbird television. However, these days, as an adult, Saturdays are filled with unfinished work from the week before. If you are lucky, maybe a nice outing or mild to moderate fornication. Still, all these don’t fill the void the way cartoons used to […]
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
Life is already hard. Deciding where to eat and get the best lifestyle experiences, isn't something you should stress about. Let VRSUS do that for you.
Z! Stacks
Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in:
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
Join The Conversation
Bring a friend.