If you’ve been on Elon Musk’s X in the last 48 hours, you’d have seen the viral “Guiding 101” tweet and some important life hacks Nigerians shared on it.
Many people have shared streetwise OTs across love, relationships, money and even careers. I’m not gonna lie, they’re spitting for real.
We’ve compiled some of the most useful ones below.
Money
Use these hacks to avoid billing, defeat sapa and stay on top of your money game.
For every time an investment looks 100% sure, also have it in mind that it can also go the other way round. Never go all in with all your savings. https://t.co/y4oTbSFlxK
— Shola 👑 (@itsSh0la) November 13, 2023
No let that last 10k finish o, no be advice na serious warning. https://t.co/qrskUF4w62
— ZADDY🦅 (@zaddy_wears) November 14, 2023
Money wey enter OPay Dey quick finish https://t.co/8Vs8oVW8gV
— Your Favourite Shoemaker 👞👞❤️ (@RHONCUSS_) November 13, 2023
1. Don’t be shy to reply billings with “Omoh! me sef broke”
— HAKEEM (@dansatty) November 14, 2023
2. No dey chest billings wey no concern you. https://t.co/adkBEUJnrG
Don’t be shy to say you don’t have https://t.co/4zP8OEKYwl
— Moh’dGazaal (@mohammedgazaal) November 13, 2023
if eye never do you like sey you wan faint, you no suppose dey reason food https://t.co/ghuZSKYeRn
— 🍷 Daddy Oyoyo (@daddyoyoyoo) November 13, 2023
money wey never reach your hand no be your money https://t.co/f8NpqFZMHq
— Max 🔴 (@can_you_feranmi) November 13, 2023
Street guiding
For how to deal with “egbon adugbos” and when you have to show your street knowledge.
before them call you chairman, call them boss https://t.co/WVCpNSIzVl
— Prom Prom🌚 (@effizzzyy) November 13, 2023
Don't help anyone hold their bags or luggage at the airport. You can help watch over it from a distance, or let them go to the security, but never hold it or take a position that suggest it's yours. https://t.co/mMOo69uc7u
— Glow✨ (@theglowstitches) November 14, 2023
If you move into a new neighborhood in Yoruba land, locate where the Egbon adugbos usually station at. One day when you’re passing there, drop some change for them without them asking. Make sure it’s not much, just enough for drinks. Tell them you’re just appreciating them. https://t.co/uI1jxE4BCZ
— Samo Agbero (@Vader_Wildcard) November 13, 2023
Even if dem tell you say road clear, try dey observe. https://t.co/GoTzBiyrED
— ROYZ (@royzkingin) November 13, 2023
Never post pictures or videos of your location until you leave the place. https://t.co/k9xStB5EWJ
— Mrhaykay🌞 (@mrhaykaylaybay) November 13, 2023
Never get into a physical fight with anyone, never! Especially with someone who has nothing to lose.
— Nu£l Kingz (@Nuel_KNG) November 13, 2023
Unless it's t's life threatening, walk away. It doesn't make you weak or stupid. https://t.co/XlElRILF2b
1. You are not "omo oba" so act deaf when they summon you with street names. Na who answer fvck up.
— Tes Tes (@da_tesleem) November 14, 2023
2. Walking with confidence and purpose.
3. When you are approached, remember nothing is funny, so no go smile.
4. Knowing alternate routes and transportation options in an area in… https://t.co/dYC5y4vir8
1. Any drink that wasn’t poured in your front isn’t for you.
— Nonyebillions (@TheNonye) November 14, 2023
2. No is a complete sentence.
3. As long as you’re sexually active, get tested regularly.
4. If you can afford it, get health insurance.
5. The only apology worth accepting is changed behavior https://t.co/xiJZbQ6PyW
“omo bro you don scarce o” better pass “omo bro you don come again?” https://t.co/gYqLid9x2t
— jesse alordiah 44DB (@jessealordiah) November 13, 2023
Anytime you go out to chill, do not sit with your back facing the entrance. Always find a spot where you can be seeing the entrance door or gate https://t.co/ZChRO3zuux
— Jollof Eleniyan (@Jollof_way) November 13, 2023
Education
These are important need-to-knows if you’re a student schooling in Nigeria.
Never beef your class rep. https://t.co/hVmdHN8R4b
— Akantantt Odaran🍃 (@LailaOlayiwola) November 14, 2023
No leave the rest for God. https://t.co/sAGMIIT2ea
— 𝕃𝕖𝔹𝕣𝕠𝕟 𝕪𝕟𝕠𝕥 𝕛𝕒𝕞𝕖𝕤👽 (@jamieeee9690) November 14, 2023
Avoid having a roommate by all means, even if it’s your friend…..staying alone >>>>>>>> https://t.co/rzAXY6jC4R
— BASH-AAR 🔞 (@FaruqBashar) November 14, 2023
If you like yourself, no ever mistakenly address your lecturer wey be Dr, as Mr https://t.co/HqkX9iS70F
— Four-eyed Edo Boy™ (@Alex_Houseof308) November 14, 2023
Once they tell you, "you can work anywhere" just know you're studying a useless course. https://t.co/wnpjXFL8Il
— Clinton (@Clinton4L) November 14, 2023
Have friends in your class https://t.co/jZFM8FlJcF
— .R (@reetsunami) November 14, 2023
Relationship
For the single pringles and those doing love thangz.
Once you get ‘hi’ regardless of the age difference, return am with ‘Boss’ 🙌🏽 https://t.co/GmTvRmit7G
— Teewhy 📸 (@IbrahimTeewhy) November 14, 2023
If a man asks “have you eaten?”, say yes even if you’ve been fasting for 40 days https://t.co/CNKjsq3YWr
— Helicopter Pylori💜 (@_Faridah___) November 13, 2023
If you ask a girl “how are you?” and she replies “not fine”,don’t ask her Why. https://t.co/3UOZW5zKIi
— ✞JOSH🧸 (@_Joshxxo) November 13, 2023
The worst time to dm a girl you’re admiring is while her pictures her going viral. https://t.co/keQaIvh3e4
— Toyosi Godwin (@ToyosiGodwin) November 13, 2023
If she’s not your woman, don’t indulge her drunken sex fantasy. Kirikiri no be Rufus and Bees 🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾 https://t.co/Xa4jalfNM3
— Bigфish🐳🇯🇲🍷🎶🎶🎶 (@HitzLuzick) November 13, 2023
Relationship 101: When someone says they like you, watch how they treat you.
— Bolaji Idowu (@pastorbolaji) November 14, 2023
Police checkpoint
For when Nigerian police officers are moving funny and you feel the need to protect yourself from them. God, abeg.
Guiding 101: Police Checkpoint Edition
— Dr Ayo (@OluAyoola7D) November 14, 2023
Style One:
If you drive and a have a look and of the age where police have a hard time deciding whether you are a yahoo boy or a legit somebody…
There is always a two second window where the police is trying to make up his mind…… https://t.co/YIohtvQWZL
Have every phone conversation as if you are being recorded or on loud speaker. https://t.co/YIohtvQWZL
— Dr Ayo (@OluAyoola7D) November 14, 2023
As a “fresh guy” If you reach a police checkpoint…
— Finance Geek (@financegeeek) November 14, 2023
1. Hail the police in your local dialect and ask him how’s work going
2. Always hold 100naira to “buy pure water” before they even ask
You won’t be asked to step down from your vehicle
Works for me 100% of the time. https://t.co/HZqxkQnSHN
** Approaching Nigeria police check point **
— QueenAminaOfZazzau ❤️™️🇳🇬💯 (@NoturRegular1) November 14, 2023
Me: ** Greets ** My fresh oga, how things na? I wan fresh like you. Help me check your pocket na, show me love.
100% of the time, no matter my position on the queue, na me dey first everybody comot. https://t.co/bcGWVduO3o
Career
For how to stay woke when dealing with capitalism.
For Lawyer:
— Multibillionaire_ESQ.⚖️ (@_gbems_) November 13, 2023
Ensure Client pay Consultation fee before you go ahead with client attorney service…. https://t.co/TAGFkF9ja2
For lawyers doing Corporate Finance or Compliance.
— Tech Esq. (@NOTIMEisNOTIME) November 14, 2023
Make sure you have a plug in every regulatory agency across all sector. It makes your job easier. https://t.co/D7JA7Ru2Kx
When you start a new course, your first priority should be getting an accountability partner or someone you can share knowledge with https://t.co/keQaIvh3e4
— Toyosi Godwin (@ToyosiGodwin) November 13, 2023
Job description:
— Alhaji Premium Man (@softhardguy) November 14, 2023
We are a small team of agile engineers.
Run ooooo. Run. https://t.co/pdqtJLpqYR
– Go on LinkedIn, search for “I’m hiring for” or “we’re hiring for” and insert your desired role. It’ll pop up with a ton of posts from hiring managers & recruiters, Many you won’t likely see on job sections /platforms
— Ada Nduka Oyom (@Kolokodess) November 14, 2023
– Have an editable version of your CV & cover letter easily… https://t.co/EvOa01yNsZ
How to get a job in 10 steps.
— Name cannot be blank (@hackSultan) November 14, 2023
1. Create an excel sheet and fill it up with at least 200 companies, links to their career page, and also their LinkedIn.
2. Write your CV in about 10 formats to suit different industry styles. – don’t submit one CV for 500 roles.
3. Look for… https://t.co/njOCSOz7ea
