This is a nice reminder that none of the troubles in the world would be happening right now if Adam had not eaten the forbidden fruit. Just imagine yourself naked in a garden with endless rivers and gold. Now open your eyes, check your account balance. Adam’s fault.

If Adam was Nigerian, we would probably still be at that garden. Here’s how:

1. He would rather eat “swallow”

Imagine you went out to name all the animals and you got back and someone gave you an apple. Never. If Adam was Nigerian, he won’t have collected it, and we would all be safe

2. He would have cheated

Eve wouldn’t even have offered brother Adamu the fruit because he would have been out cheating and they would have been fighting.

Silent treatment = No Dinner

3. He would have ghosted Eve

If Adam had ghosted her, God wouldn’t have punished both of them, just Eve. And the rest of us would have been fine.

Yes, that’s how it works.

4. He would have tried to “settle” God

He would have started with “Big bros abeg make I see you for corner”. And you know how the rest goes.