Feelings… They spring up on you even when you’ve sworn to remain on the streets. Don’t worry, just do these 10 things and the feelings will die.

1. Block them

You have to do this on all socials the moment you catch yourself smiling at their texts. Feelings can’t survive if you starve them of communication. Out of sight is out of mind.

2. Get these shades

Cover your eyes dear. No feelings formed against you shall prosper. Amen.

3. Don’t make the mistake of telling them

Don’t do it, dear.

4. Write down “I belong to the streets” 100 times and repeat it morning and night.

In a week, feelings should be gone.

5. Trash all the pictures of them you got while on a stalking spree

Purify your gallery, purify your heart.

6. Tell someone to slap you every time you mention their name

Since you don’t want to hear word.

7. Avoid them in real life

Deleting their pictures from your gallery isn’t enough. You need to go left if you see them coming from the right in real life too.

8. Think of them picking their nose

Except that turns you on in a twisted way, that’s enough to gross you out and kill the feelings.

9. Name something after them

And by ‘something’, I mean a household pest e.g rat or cockroach. Any time you see that pest, call it your crush’s name, Tunde, and gradually that feeling will begin to fade.

10. Don’t eat any food they cook

If you people have already gone as far as visiting each other, stop it. If they offer you food, say you’ve eaten. You’re not a thief.


Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.