Feelings… They spring up on you even when you’ve sworn to remain on the streets. Don’t worry, just do these 10 things and the feelings will die.
1. Block them
You have to do this on all socials the moment you catch yourself smiling at their texts. Feelings can’t survive if you starve them of communication. Out of sight is out of mind.
2. Get these shades
Cover your eyes dear. No feelings formed against you shall prosper. Amen.
3. Don’t make the mistake of telling them
Don’t do it, dear.
4. Write down “I belong to the streets” 100 times and repeat it morning and night.
In a week, feelings should be gone.
5. Trash all the pictures of them you got while on a stalking spree
Purify your gallery, purify your heart.
6. Tell someone to slap you every time you mention their name
Since you don’t want to hear word.
7. Avoid them in real life
Deleting their pictures from your gallery isn’t enough. You need to go left if you see them coming from the right in real life too.
8. Think of them picking their nose
Except that turns you on in a twisted way, that’s enough to gross you out and kill the feelings.
9. Name something after them
And by ‘something’, I mean a household pest e.g rat or cockroach. Any time you see that pest, call it your crush’s name, Tunde, and gradually that feeling will begin to fade.
10. Don’t eat any food they cook
If you people have already gone as far as visiting each other, stop it. If they offer you food, say you’ve eaten. You’re not a thief.