The topic of how young Nigerians navigate romantic relationships with their earnings is a minefield of hot takes. In Love Currency, we get into what relationships across income brackets look like in different cities.
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How long have you been with your partner?
I met my wife, Sola, through a family friend in 2022, and we got married a year later. October 2026 will make it our third year of marriage.
Tell me more about how you met
I had been single for about three years and was ready to try another relationship that would hopefully lead to marriage. But most of the ladies I met weren’t serious. Once I talked to them for a while and expressed interest, they would start asking me for money. I sell and repair ACs; I don’t have money like that.
I was tired of the constant billing, but I also wanted to find a good woman. So, I started to tell family and friends that I was looking for a wife. A close family friend connected me with Sola. At first, I didn’t consider her as an option, but she turned out to be an understanding and caring woman.
Why didn’t you consider her?
She had a two-year-old daughter. It’s not that I didn’t like her because she was a single mother; I just thought her child was young. I was worried that she was still involved with her child’s father or had to talk to him. I didn’t want to be with someone who had another man in her life.
However, my family friend assured me that the child’s father had abandoned them in Nigeria and married someone else in another country. That meant they wouldn’t be seeing each other physically, and he wouldn’t be calling her every time either.
I started getting to know Sola better. We connected, and I liked her character. She didn’t bill me like other women. In fact, she cooked and served me the first day I went to her house. We weren’t even dating then. It showed me that she was really mature and wouldn’t need a man to give her money before showing him respect and care.
Interesting. What was Sola’s financial situation like when you got together?
She taught at a school — she still does — and also had a hairdressing salon in front of her family’s house. I don’t really know how much she was making, but she lived alone and was comfortable. It was the first time I dated a financially independent woman. She even helped me with small business loans a few times. I always paid her back, sha.
She had to let go of her salon when we got married in 2023. Her family’s house is quite far from where we live, so it doesn’t make sense to travel all that distance for a salon. We haven’t been able to raise money to get a better salon close to us, so she’s been running home services after school and on the weekends.
Also, my wife’s child started living with us a year ago. It’s not easy to manage her work at the school and two children (we had a baby in 2024). Now imagine adding the stress of a salon and apprentices. It was easier when the eldest child was with Sola’s parents.
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Do you mean your stepdaughter didn’t always live with you both?
No, she didn’t. She lived with her grandparents. Even when Sola and I were dating, the child didn’t live with her. I honestly thought we’d continue with that arrangement after marriage.
However, Sola’s mum had a stroke last year and couldn’t take care of the child anymore. I suggested sending her to stay with Sola’s sister, but Sola refused. It almost caused a big fight, but I had to let the issue go to let peace reign.
Why were you against the idea?
We never discussed the child living with us. It was like being forced into a financial responsibility I hadn’t prepared for. Imagine starting a marriage with children almost immediately. My expenses have doubled. I can’t drop money for food and say it’s only for one child na, abi?
The child also recently started school, and Sola begged me to contribute to the school fees. That was an extra ₦80k I hadn’t planned for. I can’t tell her to go and meet the child’s father because people will say, “Didn’t you know she was a single mother before you married her?” So, I have to accept that I’ll have to financially provide for the child one way or another, even if I don’t particularly like it.
It’s what Yorubas call “Abẹ́lẹ́jayan án”— someone who engages in an unprofitable venture. No matter how much I spend on the child, she’ll still wake up one day and go look for her real father.
That’s an interesting way to look at it. Does your wife know about your concerns?
I believe she knows the child isn’t my primary responsibility, so she doesn’t always come to me with her needs. It’s just when she needs help that she outrightly asks. And of course, as a woman, she knows how to get money from me when she really needs it. For instance, I can’t just ignore her complaints about the child being sick. I’ll have to step in if I have money.
How do you both run your home’s finances?
We don’t really discuss it; we just know what the other has to do to contribute to the expenses. I pay ₦450k in rent for our mini flat, pay for electricity, and drop ₦10k every week for food. If the food money isn’t enough, she adds money.
She also handles the children’s needs and small things around the house. Sometimes when I’m broke, Sola loans me money, and I pay her back when I make money. We know how to manage ourselves.
Do you have a budget for relationship expenses, like dates and gifts?
No. We don’t spend money on unnecessary things. If she sees something she likes and needs, she tells me, and if I have money, I’ll give it to her. If I don’t, we leave it. I’m not a birthday person like that, so I don’t need gifts. If she wants to make me happy, she knows she just needs to cook my favourite meal and let me rest.
Do you both have financial safety nets?
I put ₦30k into a monthly ajo contribution, so I only need to add a little money to it and pay rent. Sola knows how to manage money, so whenever I have excess cash, I give it to her to keep for me. Most of the time, we still use whatever I keep with her to handle household needs or family emergencies.
What’s your ideal financial future as a couple?
I hope to be a major electronics supplier in the future. At least, if I make enough money to do business, we’ll be able to live a better life and enjoy good things. Sola is also always talking about building her own school someday. So, that’ll be good too.
Interested in talking about how money moves in your relationship? If yes, click here.
*Names have been changed for the sake of anonymity.
Every week, Zikoko seeks to understand how people move the Naira in and out of their lives. Some stories will be struggle-ish, others will be bougie. All the time, it’ll be revealing.
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When did you first realise the importance of money?
I understood the concept of exchange before actually handling money. In primary school, I loved drawing cartoon characters like Ben 10 and Naruto, and I was good at it.
I drew these characters on pieces of paper torn from my notebook. My mum, who was a headmistress, wasn’t particularly impressed that I tore my notebooks to draw. So, as a workaround, I drew for classmates in exchange for extra sheets of paper. I was being paid, just not with money.
Watching how hard my mum worked also made me think about the importance of money.
Tell me more
My mum was a single mum of two. My dad died pretty early; I don’t even remember much about him. So, it was up to my mum to provide for us. We weren’t financially stable, but I knew my mum worked hard to keep food on the table. We couldn’t always afford nice things, but she did her best to ensure we had the basics.
What was the first thing you did to earn money?
Still my drawing and art talent. I went to a secondary school attended by rich kids, and one day, when I was in JSS 2, a classmate approached me. He’d heard I could draw and needed help with his assignment. He paid me ₦200, which was enough for two doughnuts and a bottle of Coke. It was good money.
After that, I had a relatively steady stream of people paying me at least ₦150 to do their assignments. I stopped in JSS 3 when a teacher noticed my drawing style in other students’ assignments and warned me not to do it anymore.
I didn’t do anything else for money until uni. I entered uni in 2017 and was on a ₦10k/month allowance from my mum, which only covered food and transport, nothing extra. Even then, ₦10k didn’t last me until the end of the month. In the second semester, my uncle gave me a laptop, and I decided to learn design.
How did you go about this?
I knew a graphic designer from church, and with my mum’s consent, I spent my semester break learning CorelDRAW at his studio. It helped me learn how to digitally recreate the images I drew on paper. I also assisted the graphic designer with t-shirt prints, banner designs and the like.
I learnt from him for two months until school resumed. In school, I kept designing and started posting my work on my WhatsApp status. Then a friend reached out one day, asking if I designed logos. I said “yes,” and she introduced me to a client.
I can’t forget that logo. It was for a finance-based business, and the logo featured a house with a chimney. Now that I think about it, we don’t have chimneys in Nigeria, so that was completely unnecessary.
I’m screaming. How much did you make from that first gig?
₦2500. It was the biggest amount I could think of. Subsequently, I started receiving logo requests from fellow students who ran small businesses. I didn’t have a flat rate. Students don’t have money, and no one would’ve paid ₦2500.
So, I charged students between ₦1k and ₦1500 for logos and banners. Most of the time, I was only making an extra ₦3k or ₦4k a month, but it felt nice to add that to my pocket money.
This went on until COVID came. While people complained about being bored, all I did was eat, sleep and watch design tutorials. I was designing every single day. Before the school shutdown, I’d begun moving with a student club of developers and tech guys. I could tell these guys had more money than the average student, and I figured I could be like that if I improved my craft. The lockdown gave me the opportunity to fine-tune my skills.
Some time after the lockdown was lifted, I posted a test project I’d designed on Twitter. A marketing agency reached out to me and told me they liked my work. Then, they asked if I was open to a full-time role.
That’s how they offered me a job with a ₦60k/month salary. I was so excited that I called my mum immediately. Unfortunately, my excitement was short-lived.
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Uh oh. What happened?
They fired me after three months. I had a difficult time transitioning from freelancing to paid employment. I’m a perfectionist, and I take time because I need everything to look good. However, companies have deadlines, and after I delayed a few tasks, the agency ghosted me. They didn’t even give me clear communication; they just stopped paying my salary and didn’t respond to my questions. I got the message.
I was sad because I liked the job, but the experience helped me realise I wasn’t as good as I thought. There had been callbacks on a number of my designs, and it was pretty clear I still had some learning to do.
I lost the job in December 2020, and around the same time, a friend introduced me to someone who had opened a co-working space. The founder told me he needed a designer to create marketing materials, but didn’t have the money to pay. However, I would get free access to the co-working space (plus the WiFi) as long as I worked with him.
Did you accept?
I did. It would give me the opportunity to work on my craft and potentially meet new people. This arrangement lasted two years, and during that time, the founder referred me to multiple clients. So, it was a win-win.
Beyond the referrals, I was getting gigs from various sources. One time, I worked with a guy who had Fiverr and Upwork accounts and would outsource gigs to me. In 2021, I got my first foreign client on Twitter, who paid me $82 for a couple of gigs. He returned a few more times.
Throughout 2021, my monthly income from design ranged between ₦30k – ₦90k. It wasn’t stable, but I earned something every month.
2022 came with an eight-month ASUU strike and new opportunities. I landed a four-month internship at a design agency and participated in branding projects and training classes. They paid me a ₦100k/month stipend.
The experience and exposure I got from the internship gave me the morale to return to the founder of the co-working space to tell him I needed to start getting paid.
Get it! What did he say?
He couldn’t create a budget for me at the workspace, so he transferred me to a fintech company that he was a part of. There, I got hired as a brand and product designer. My salary started at ₦80k/month, then jumped to ₦120k after the three-month probation. This was in 2023.
I was in 400 level at this point, juggling the fintech job, actively freelancing and taking occasional gigs from the design agency I interned at. The least amount I earned in a month was my ₦120k salary. With my other hustles, I was comfortably netting ₦200k – ₦500k in some months.
Not bad for a student. What were your spending habits like?
Besides spending on the basic necessities, I was saving to buy a MacBook. In the design community, that laptop is like a badge of honour. It took me a full year to save over ₦1m to buy it.
In 2024, I left the fintech because I was juggling bigger things — Fiverr. I had opened an account in January because a friend was opening his, and I thought it wouldn’t hurt to join him. That turned out to be the best decision I’ve made for my freelance journey.
I made $120 in the first month I joined Fiverr. By March, Fiverr and a few other freelance projects brought me ₦1.5m. The subsequent months were at least ₦700k. I also got another full-time role at a creative agency at some point in the year. They paid me ₦200k/month.
So, I was earning from two full-time jobs and a profitable freelance hustle. To put it simply, I was balling.
Love to see it
The extra income made it easy for me to start thinking about investments. I began thinking of a future where I could afford not to work, and I knew investments could get me there. So, I started sending any spare cash to a real estate plan on an investment app.
After leaving the fintech in November 2024, I took another part-time job with a returning UK-based client. He paid me $1000/month to work 40 hours a week. So, again, I was working two jobs and managing my freelancing business.
Wasn’t that a lot to juggle? Also, you haven’t mentioned school in a while.
See, greed is a very fascinating thing. I tried not to take on heavy freelance gigs, but I was still practically doing three different things at once. Who says no to money?
As for school, I dropped out in my final year. I wasn’t doing very well, and the course wasn’t what I wanted to do. I even got an extra year. I just couldn’t engage with school anymore, so I finally quit in 2025.
I’m curious, how did your mum react to that?
I kept it from her until I couldn’t anymore. My answers to her “What’s happening at school?” got sloppier, and I had to come clean. My mum doesn’t cry. I can count the number of times I’ve seen her cry. But the day I told her I dropped out, she completely broke down.
The thing is, my mum is an academic. She believes you need to go to school to get a good job and have a good life. She couldn’t believe I’d make such a decision after all her sacrifices. The issue shook our relationship, and it’s still shaky to this day. She doesn’t talk to me much anymore. I try to call her, but our conversations are always awkward.
Do you think it was worth it to drop out so close to the finish line, though?
I don’t think staying around would’ve changed anything. I never cared for classes, and even as a final-year student, I still couldn’t answer basic questions about my course.
Besides, people around me were graduating and doing totally different things. You’d see someone who graduated with a nursing degree working as a product manager. Life isn’t black and white. If I can’t give my time to school, I might as well give it to design and build a stronger career.
It also helped that I was doing really well financially. I left the creative agency in 2025 to focus on the UK job and Fiverr. My monthly income was around $2000, which is almost ₦3m in naira. I was financially responsible for myself. I moved into a new apartment, set up a small workstation, bought an inverter to solve power issues and Starlink to avoid network wahala. The whole thing cost me about ₦3m, but it was definitely worth it for my productivity.
What does your monthly income look like these days?
I’m still at the $2k mark, but this is entirely from the UK job (I got a raise in 2024). My Fiverr account was blocked in October, I suspect, due to a bad review left by a client. I haven’t been able to gain access since then.
The experience has driven me to put more effort into growing my personal brand, in case I lose another source of income. I still get occasional freelance gigs, but it’s not at the same level as I had with Fiverr.
In addition to building my personal brand, I’m very intentional about my investments. I live on 25% – 30% of my income; the rest goes into investments. A short-term goal I have, which I call my 401 (k), is to get to the point where my investments pay me at least ₦1m every month.
The investment app I use has a feature that gives users 25% of their total investment monthly if they have more than ₦5m in their accounts. I estimate I’ll need ₦40m in the account to get ₦1m monthly, and I plan to get there in 5 years.
My long-term goal is to save up to $1m or at least ₦1bn. If I invest that in different channels and earn around $15k monthly, I’ll never need to work again.
Those are big dreams. Let’s talk about the life your income affords you right now
The life I live doesn’t match my income at all. I’m very frugal. Last year, I earned ₦40m in income and ₦2m in investment dividends. Yet, I live in a tiny self-contained apartment. I’m a big believer in staying as small as possible for as long as possible.
I spend 30% of my income now, and that’s only because of the new tax laws. I don’t want the government taxing me too much, so I registered an LLC early this year and now “pay” myself a ₦600k monthly salary. The rest of the money stays in investments. Even from that ₦600k, my usual monthly expense is just about ₦350k. The rest still goes to investments and other minor expenses. I live way below my means. I have a budget for everything.
Walk me through what your monthly budget looks like
How about your investment portfolio?
I have ₦1.2m in my emergency fund. I started investing in stocks in 2025, and currently have ₦8.6m there. Then another ₦20.4m in my real estate investment account — that’s the one I’m trying to raise to ₦40m.
I also have another ₦360k in a separate account specifically for taxes. I calculate tax for whatever I earn and send it there, so I’m not surprised when the government starts asking for it. In total, my net worth is around ₦35m, which is still very far from ₦1bn.
How would you describe your relationship with money?
I’m very diligent with money. I’m diligent about how I make it, and for the past year, I’ve been diligent about paying myself first by investing in my future goals. One thing I’m still trying to learn is staying with my budget.
Sometimes, my actual monthly expenses reach ₦450k. Clearly, I still have some work to do with watching out for the small things that balloon into big expenses. Buying more protein shakes at the gym or spending a bit more on transport once or twice don’t sound like much, but those things that add up.
Is there an ideal amount of money you think you should be earning?
For my perfect life, my dream income is $15k/month. However, I’m really happy with where I am. It’s a lot more than most people get. So I’m not complaining. I want more, as most people do, but I am also content. I’m not overspending, and I’m going slowly. Slow is good. Slow is fine.
Is there anything you want right now but can’t afford?
Maybe a relationship. I can afford it, to be honest, but I know love can be financial. I’m too frugal to spend on dates or anything like that right now.
How would you rate your financial happiness on a scale of 1-10?
9. I earn enough to create artificial scarcity. I earn almost ₦3m monthly but choose to live on just ₦600k. That’s an interesting place to be.
Curious, do you sometimes wish you’d completed school?
I have no regrets. Of course, there’s the issue of the certificate, but I’m open to the idea of having my own business one day, and I can always go to business school.
If you’re interested in talking about your Naira Life story, this is a good place to start.
The Nigerian experience is physical, emotional, and sometimes international. No one knows it better than our features on #TheAbroadLife, a series where we detail and explore Nigerian experiences while living abroad.
Timilehin* (30) left Nigeria for the US with just a desire for better opportunities and no long-term plan. In this story, he shares how trading cryptocurrencies gave him the funds for his trip and how he ended up in the US Navy.
This model is AI-generated and not affiliated with the story in any way
Where do you currently live, and when did you leave Nigeria?
Currently, I live in Atlanta in the United States. I left Nigeria in 2021.
What inspired you to leave?
A friend I went to school with inspired me, and two other things served as a trigger, or push, if you would. While we were in school, my friend always said we should find a way to leave Nigeria so we could do our master’s abroad. It stuck with me.
After we graduated, we couldn’t make that wish a reality because we couldn’t afford it and weren’t doing much. I personally couldn’t get help from the family front because we didn’t have the money: My dad was a teacher, so going to school on his salary had been a struggle. I did all sorts of jobs to make some cash, including satellite TV installations, which I took on during my National Youth Service (NYSC) year.
All the while, the idea of going abroad for my master’s had stuck with me. But the trigger for leaving was the astonishing lack of opportunities. Even as a graduate, most of us couldn’t secure jobs with our certificates. The EndSARS protests capped it all off. Seeing the government kill so many young people and deny it, made us want to get out. So when we got the opportunity to do our master’s in the US, we took it. I wasn’t married and had no children or strong attachments other than my immediate family, so it was not a difficult decision.
How did you afford the move?
Around 2018 to 2019, crypto started blowing up. Some friends and I got into cryptocurrency, buying and selling Bitcoin and doing Non-fungible Tokens (NFTs). We started getting a little money, and it was that money we used to process our exams like the Graduate Record Examination (GRE), pay application fees, and fund the move abroad.
The money was really useful because, for an average Nigerian, it can be difficult to afford application fees, which can be in the hundreds of dollars. For someone struggling to eat, it’s a lot to spend on what is basically trial and error, because the schools you apply to may not admit you.
What was it like when you arrived in the US?
It wasn’t the smoothest experience. I had to spend my first days in a hotel, and it was so expensive; I was worried I was going to end up spending all the money I’d come with. Also, there were a lot of culture shocks.
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What were some of these shocks?
First was the food, which was very different from what I was used to in Nigeria. They also have too many options, making it difficult to figure out their food.
Let’s say you try to get a burger. You would expect it to be straightforward. But you’ll say you want a burger and they’ll ask you something like if you want cheese. Okay, you tell them to add the cheese, then they’ll ask you what type. I didn’t even know there were different types of cheese back then. It just goes on like that, answering so many questions before you get your food.
Another thing is just how large the US is. It feels like most places are not close by. Everything is at least thirty minutes from where you are. Having a car is not a luxury; it’s just a necessity if you want to get anywhere. I got a bicycle that I used to ride around. But I guess I got too comfortable, and I wouldn’t lock it when I left it outside. One time, I travelled, and when I came back, it had been stolen. I found it surprising because it wasn’t even an expensive one. It cost about $70, so I didn’t expect it to be stolen.
Another shock was the school culture. All the professors are completely fine with you calling them by just their first names.
Then there’s the attitude towards hosting. In Nigeria, when a birthday celebrant invites people to a restaurant, they’ll handle the bill, but here, everyone is expected to pay for themselves.
What was the settling-in process like socially?
I don’t go out a lot. I didn’t have much of a social life even in Nigeria, so I have little to compare it with. But in my daily interactions with Americans, I found that most of them think I am Black American when they first meet me, until I tell them I’m Nigerian. They find it difficult to pronounce my name, so I just tell them my name is Tim or Timmy. That’s easier for them.
How did you find education in the US compared to Nigeria?
The volume of assignments is a lot. You might do only three courses, but the amount of work, presentations, and assignments is massive. It is harder than in Nigeria, but eventually, I figured it out.
What is your support system like in the US?
I don’t really miss Nigeria in terms of friendships or my support system because most of my friends are here. My brother is here too. He joined me a year after I arrived in 2022. I also came along with many of my friends, and many of my classmates from the university in Nigeria are here now. I have almost all my support system here—people I’ve known for about twelve years now. The only person I have left in Nigeria who would make me come around to visit is my mum.
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Have you visited Nigeria since you left?
No, I haven’t been back. I intend to go, but I haven’t found the time with the way my work is structured. Some of my friends intend to go for two months, but I feel I’d probably stay only for a week or two if I go, and then it feels like a waste of money for such a short trip.
Do you see the US as a long-term plan, or do you intend to return to Nigeria?
I am very conflicted about that. I want to go back, but then I see what is happening in Nigeria, and I am discouraged. You see the reports online of things like kidnappings or trucks falling on people. These people didn’t even do anything wrong. It’s just a case of being in the wrong place at the wrong time. There’s nothing they could have done differently that would have taken them out of that scenario.
So it makes me think: “Do I want to just leave my life to chance in a place where the chances are not good?” It feels like in Nigeria, everything is just set up to go the wrong way. I’m hesitant to leave the US, which has a system that works, for one that doesn’t work. But I’m not ruling out the possibility of a return.
Do you like the city you live in?
Yes. Atlanta is actually my favourite city. There is a large Black community here. I’ve briefly stayed in Houston, which feels exactly like you are in Nigeria because of the weather and the amount of Nigerian food, but Atlanta is a perfect blend of Nigeria and America. My least favourite was Chicago because it is extremely cold. That’s where I did my training for the Navy, and learning to swim in the Chicago cold was one of my worst experiences here.
You’re in the US Navy?
Yes. I joined the Navy last year. The process was fun at times, but also a little depressing. I didn’t know how to swim very well when I joined. I struggled to learn how to swim in the cold, which is why I said I don’t like Chicago. At the end of the day, I survived and passed.
What made you choose to join the Navy?
Well, it’s not like how it is in Nigeria. Here, joining the military is very encouraged; you get lots of benefits like tuition waivers and free education for your children. You can also get access to no-interest loans. And, if you are not a citizen, you become eligible for citizenship.
My brother joined the US Army first. But I chose the Navy because I saw it as slightly less physical than the Army.
Interesting. So you’re a US citizen now?
Yes, I am.
Did you have any longer-term plans when you left Nigeria for the US?
No, I didn’t really have a plan. It was just a case of getting in and figuring out how to go about it once I arrived. We got here and then looked for opportunities to change our status. But now, career-wise, I hope to just keep growing and hopefully, down the line, run a business that’ll allow me to retire.
There has been a lot of anti-immigrant talk in the US recently. Does that make you uncomfortable?
Not really. People have a right to vote, and they voted for whoever is in power. Nothing happening right now is a surprise because this was basically the manifesto of the current administration. It’s what they campaigned on. I am not affected because I am already a citizen. But I’ll just say that we are getting what was voted for.
Have you felt discriminated against due to your race or nationality?
I’ll give you a recent example. I was bringing up my new 75-inch TV in the elevator, and a white man came in. He saw me with the TV and asked why I was delivering it there. He thought I was the delivery man.
Things like that happen a lot. When people here see a Black person in certain situations, they make silly assumptions like that. If they see you in an expensive car, they might assume you’re just the driver.
I told the man the TV was mine and I didn’t let it affect me personally, but I see how it could be disappointing for others who experience things like that.
What has been your worst experience in the US?
My worst experience was in Chicago when I was struggling to pass my swim qualification for the Navy. Others had graduated, and I was left behind, feeling stuck. It made me start wondering why I even came.
Other than that, the US has provided me with opportunities I never would have thought of. It is a level playing ground. The son of nobody can become somebody here.
What has been your best experience?
I’ve had some really good ones. Graduating from school, getting a job, and becoming a US citizen have been really good experiences. Generally, it’s a really great feeling doing so well for myself and seeing that all my friends are doing well too.
On a scale of one to ten, how happy are you in the US?
I’ll say nine out of ten. I’m not saying ten because nothing is ever perfect.
Do you want to share your Abroad Life story? Please reach out to me here. For new episodes of Abroad Life, check in every Friday at 12 PM (WAT).
Someone you know has left or is planning to leave. 1,000 Ways to Japa speaks to real people and explores the endless reasons and paths they take to japa.
Uzor* (22) always wanted to study abroad. So when his friend learned about top-up courses at a conference, he jumped at the opportunity. In this story, Uzor shares how long it took him to complete his studies and what living in the UK feels like.
Where do you currently live, and when did you leave Nigeria?
I currently live in the UK, and I left Nigeria in 2022.
What inspired your move to the UK?
I was inspired by the desire to study abroad. So after I got my diploma in Lagos, I transferred to a UK school, joined a final year class and earned a degree in Computer Systems Engineering.
How did you find out you could do a transfer?
Some universities do something called top-up courses, which is a fancy way of saying you can study at the university for a specific number of years if you already have some qualifications. They had a course related to what I already did for my diploma, so I met their transfer requirements. Over here, Computer Systems Engineering is a three-year course, so I was able to skip two years and join in the third year.
Congratulations! Was there any scholarship involved?
No. I self-funded.
How much did it cost you?
I can’t remember exactly how much I spent, but I estimate it’s about £18,000 for the entire program and £7000 to get me to the UK.
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How did you hear about the school?
I heard about it through a friend who attended a conference they organised. I can’t recall exactly how he heard about the conference, but he somehow ended up there and then told me about it. At the conference, a travel agency, with affiliations to the school, said they help students with the application process for free. This was such a relief because our agent at the time wanted to charge us ₦150,000 per head. We both jumped at the chance to do it at no cost.
Eventually, they explained that agents are not supposed to charge students for assisting with their applications because the schools pay the agents per student they bring in.
What’s the name of the school you attended?
The University of Sunderland.
What documents did the travel agency ask you to bring?
They asked for regular documents, nothing out of the ordinary: degree certificates, National Identification Number (NIN), West African Senior School Certificate Examination (WASSCE) results. I can’t remember the full details, but I know they don’t ask for a document you’d have a hard time providing.
How long did it take for the school to get back to you?
The school itself responded fairly quickly in general. I heard back from them within two weeks.
How long did your visa take?
The visa was a bit more complex. It took me about a month, but that was because a certain document was missing in the ones I submitted. They had to mail me back and ask that I send it to them again. This means my application went through the loop twice. I had paid for priority processing, which usually gets you a response within a week, but because of the missing document, I had to wait four weeks.
What were the specific things you spent on for the visa application?
I paid for the visa application fee and the Immigration Health Surcharge (IHS) fee. The details are really blurry here, but I paid for the number of years I was to spend studying.
What documents did you need for your visa application?
I can’t quite remember all the documents they asked for, but I know it wasn’t much
Let’s go back to the school. Is it a place you’d recommend for people looking to study in the UK?
I wouldn’t necessarily say I recommend it, and it’s mostly because of where it’s situated. It’s not a city, just a small town.
Ok. This is about the town; how about the school’s systems?
It’s ok, really. I didn’t have a direct experience with the system and can’t exactly recommend it to people. I spent only ten months there; if I had spent longer, then I’d be able to authoritatively speak on it.
Does the school require certain grades for the top-up courses?
I believe they reserve the right to reject you based on your grades.
What other UK universities do top-up courses?
The University of South Wales and Middlesex University do it. There could be others. I encourage people to check.
You’ve graduated, no?
Yes, I have.
Congratulations! What visa are you currently on?
I’m on the sponsorship visa.
How long did it take you to get sponsorship?
It took me about a year after school to get sponsorship. But it wasn’t all bad for me because I already had a remote job I was doing. After I found my current job, I quit that one. They take care of my sponsorship.
What’s your favourite thing about living in the UK?
My favourite thing about the UK is the structure. Here, you’re sure that your train will arrive when it’s supposed to, and things work as they’re supposed to. This has a way of elevating your daily life.
What’s your least favourite thing?
I don’t like the weather. I’m also not a fan of the social structure here. It makes it difficult to have friends. It’s slightly different from Nigeria.
Have you been able to make any friends so far?
I moved with a couple of my friends from Lagos
Would you recommend top-up courses for people looking to study in the UK?
I absolutely loved moving to the UK through this route. But would I recommend it? I wouldn’t immediately say yes, and this is because it’s not on the cheap side. Also, immigration rules are changing a lot these days, and the UK government frankly doesn’t know what it’s doing.
So, my advice to anyone considering this route is to find out and acknowledge the risks involved. Know the path you’re working on because getting sponsorship jobs is quite hard. There is a barrier to entry, so some companies, even if they wanted to hire some people, can’t exactly do so.
On a scale of one to ten, how would you rate life in the UK compared to Nigeria?
At the baseline level, the UK is definitely a better place to live compared to Nigeria. But there are also things that make Nigeria lovely. The first is the strong feeling of home attached to it, primarily because I was born and grew up there. There’s also easy access to Nigerian food, unlike here in the UK.
What I’m saying is that the UK is better in terms of ease and structure. So if I were to put a number to it, I’d say a seven.
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If you’re hitting the gym before sunrise, battling hot traffic, or powering through back-to-back meetings, staying fresh throughout the day can feel like a real challenge. The good news is that a few smart daily habits, paired with the right hygiene products like Dettol Cool Soap, can make all the difference between feeling sweaty and staying fresh.
Here are five simple daily routines you can try today to keep you feeling fresh all day.
Start the morning strong with a shower
Your morning shower sets the tone for everything that follows, so make it count. Lukewarm or cool water helps close your pores and leaves skin feeling refreshed, but the real game-changer is what you bathe with.
Reach for Dettol Cool, a soap that delivers trusted antibacterial germ protection while giving you an invigorating burst of cooling freshness. It leaves your skin feeling cool and refreshed, like a gentle breeze on a hot day. Make it part of your daily routine.
Target the trouble zones
Many people assume sweat itself causes body odour, but sweat is largely odourless. The smell develops when bacteria living on the skin break down sweat in areas like the underarms and other tight spaces on the body. Because these areas produce more sweat, they can become hotspots for odour. During and after your shower, give these spots a little extra attention to help keep bacteria under control and stay fresh throughout the day.
Also, apply a reliable antiperspirant or deodorant immediately after drying off; your skin is most receptive then. For your feet, ensure they’re completely dry before putting on socks and shoes, since moisture is what bacteria love most. Breathable fabrics make a big difference, too. By washing away bacteria with an antibacterial product like Dettol Cool, you keep your body smelling fresh for longer.
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Stay hydrated, stay fresh
Living in a warm climate like Nigeria’s means your body works harder to stay cool throughout the day. When temperatures rise, you naturally sweat more to regulate your body temperature, which is why staying properly hydrated is essential.
Drinking enough water helps your body cool itself more efficiently and can prevent overheating. Aim for at least eight glasses of water per day and if you’re exercising, you’ll need even more.
You can also support hydration with water-rich foods and drinks. Options like watermelon and cucumber also help keep your internal cooling system running smoothly.
Have a mid-day reset
Even with the best morning routine, an active day takes its toll. A mid-afternoon reset can make the second half of your day feel just as fresh as the first. Take a quick rinse after your
lunch break or workout to refresh your body. When that’s not practical, use a cool, damp cloth on your neck and wrists, cleansing wipes, or change into fresh clothes.
Many active individuals swear by keeping a small hygiene kit in their bag: a travel-sized deodorant, a face wash, and a Dettol Cool soap. This kind of proactive hygiene thinking is what separates people who merely cope with their active lifestyle from those who thrive in it.
Wind down with an evening cleanse
The evening cleanse is often overlooked, but it’s one of the most important steps in a complete hygiene routine. Throughout the day, your skin accumulates sweat, bacteria, environmental pollutants, and dead skin cells. Going to bed without washing it all away is not just uncomfortable; it can lead to skin issues and a less restful night’s sleep.
A thorough evening bath does double duty: it removes the day’s buildup while the cooling sensation helps lower your body temperature slightly, which can actually signal to your body that it’s time to wind down.
Make your evening shower a consistent part of your routine. Light, breathable nightwear, a clean sleep environment, and fresh skin mean you wake up in a better state, and your morning shower becomes even more effective.
Here’s the bottom line
Staying cool, clean, and odour-free isn’t about one habit. It’s about building a consistent routine that works with your lifestyle. For active individuals who demand more from their day, Dettol Cool soap earns its place in that routine by offering the dual assurance of proven antibacterial protection and a cooling sensation.
Did you upset the woman you love? Well, finding the right apology message for her (and meaning it) is essential to fixing your relationship. Whether it’s a small misunderstanding or a seismic mistake, expressing your regret genuinely can help heal wounds and bring you closer together.
That’s why we’ve gathered over 200 apology messages for her to help you properly convey your feelings. From short texts to long, heartfelt messages, this post has the perfect apology message for her. Each option will help you express remorse and remind her how much she means to you.
Short Apology Message for Her
We all know that a few well-chosen words can speak louder than a long speech. A short apology message for her is perfect for when you want to express regret quickly but meaningfully.
I’m really sorry for hurting you. You mean too much to me for me to let my mistake stand without trying to make it right.
I hate knowing that I’m the reason you’re upset. Please forgive me. I’m truly sorry.
I messed up, and I take full responsibility. I’m sorry for hurting you, and I’ll do better.
I’m sorry for the way I handled things. You deserve more care from me.
I never meant to make you feel unimportant. I’m sorry, and I hope you can forgive me.
I know words alone can’t fix everything, but I truly am sorry for what I did.
I regret the way I spoke to you. You didn’t deserve that, and I’m sorry.
I’m sorry for letting my emotions get the best of me. You deserve all the kindness in the world from me.
I wish I could take back what I said, but all I can do now is apologise and try to be better.
I’m really sorry for the pain I caused. I hope with time I can earn back your trust.
You didn’t deserve the way I treated you. I’m sorry, and I genuinely want to make things right.
I’ve thought a lot about what happened, and I’m truly sorry for my part in it.
I hate that my actions hurt you. Please know that I’m sincerely sorry.
I’m sorry for not listening the way I should have. Your feelings matter, and I should have respected that.
I let you down, and I’m sorry. You deserve better from me.
I’m sorry for the misunderstanding and the hurt it caused. I care about you more than you know.
I should have handled things differently, and I regret that I didn’t. I’m really sorry.
I’m sorry for taking you for granted. You deserve appreciation and respect from me.
I never want to be the reason you’re hurting. I’m truly sorry for what happened.
I know apologies don’t erase the past, but please know that I mean this one sincerely.
I’m sorry for the way things turned out between us. I care about you, and I regret hurting you.
I’m sorry for the way I behaved, my love. I’ll do better for you.
I’m sorry for hurting you, even if I didn’t realise it at the time. You matter more than I can say.
I’m truly sorry for letting my actions come between us. Your heart means everything to me.
I know I’ve hurt you, and I hate that I did. Please let me make it right, starting now.
I know I hurt you, and that’s the last thing I ever want to do. I’m deeply sorry.
When a simple “sorry” isn’t enough to undo the damage, a long apology message for her will allow you to fully express your feelings and let her know just how much she means to you.
I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about what happened, and I realise how much my actions hurt you. I’m deeply sorry for the pain I caused. You didn’t deserve that from me, especially from someone who claims to care about you as much as I do. I truly regret the way I handled things, and I hope with time and patience I can show you that I’m capable of doing better.
I know I hurt you, and that’s something I can’t ignore or brush off. I’m sorry for the way I acted and for the way my choices affected you. You’ve always deserved respect from me, and I regret the moment I failed to give you that. I hope you’ll give me the chance to learn from this and make things right.
I want to sincerely apologise for what I did. Looking back, I can see clearly how my words and actions must have made you feel, and that realisation hurts me deeply. You matter to me, and the last thing I ever wanted was to be the reason you felt upset or disappointed. I’m truly sorry, and I hope I can earn back your trust.
I regret the way things happened between us. I know my actions created distance where there should have been understanding. I’m sorry for not thinking carefully about how my behavior would affect you. You deserve someone who considers your feelings, and I’m committed to being more thoughtful and aware going forward.
I’m not proud of the way I handled things, and I take full responsibility for my mistake. I’m sorry for the hurt I caused you. You’ve always been important to me, and it hurts knowing that my actions made you question that. I hope I can prove through my actions that I’m serious about doing better.
I want you to know that my apology comes from a genuine place. I’ve thought a lot about what happened and how my actions affected you. I’m truly sorry for the pain and disappointment I caused. You deserve kindness, patience, and respect from me, and I regret that I didn’t show that when it mattered most.
I know an apology doesn’t erase the hurt immediately, but I still want to say it because it’s the truth. I’m sorry for the way I behaved and for the way it made you feel. I care about you deeply, and the thought of being the reason you’re hurting is something I take seriously.
I wish I could go back and handle things differently, because you deserved so much better from me. I’m sorry for the way my actions affected you and for not being more understanding at the time. I’ve reflected on it a lot, and I truly regret the pain I caused.
I know I disappointed you, and I understand why you’re hurt. I’m sorry for letting things get to that point. You’ve always been someone I respect and care about, and I hate knowing that I’m the one who made you feel this way.
I want to apologise sincerely for the way I treated you. Looking back, I can see how my actions must have made you feel unappreciated and upset. That was never my intention, but I know intentions don’t erase the impact. I’m truly sorry.
I’ve been replaying everything in my mind, and I see now where I went wrong. I’m sorry for the hurt I caused you. You’ve always deserved honesty and care from me, and I regret the moment I failed to show that.
I’m deeply sorry for the pain my actions caused you. I should have handled things with more patience and maturity. You deserve someone who respects your feelings, and I regret that I didn’t show that in the moment.
I hate knowing that my actions made you feel hurt or disappointed. You’re someone I genuinely care about, and it pains me to know that I was the reason you were upset. I’m truly sorry and hope I can make things right.
I’ve taken time to reflect on what happened, and I realise how much my actions affected you. I’m sorry for the way I handled things and for the hurt it caused. You deserved better from me, and I’m committed to learning from this mistake.
I want to apologise for the way I spoke and the way I acted. It wasn’t fair to you, and it didn’t reflect the respect I truly have for you. I’m sorry for hurting you and for not thinking about how my words would affect you.
I know trust is built through actions, and I regret the moment I gave you a reason to doubt me. I’m truly sorry for what happened. You deserve consistency, honesty, and respect, and I want to work towards being better for you.
I’m sorry for letting my emotions get the best of me. In the moment, I wasn’t thinking clearly, and I ended up hurting someone who means a lot to me. I regret that deeply and hope you can eventually forgive me.
I understand if you need time to process everything. All I want you to know right now is that I’m sincerely sorry. I regret hurting you and truly wish I had handled things differently.
I know my apology won’t immediately undo what happened, but I still want to say it because you deserve to hear it. I’m sorry for my actions and for the pain they caused you.
I’m sorry for the misunderstanding and the hurt it created between us. I wish I had taken the time to listen more carefully and respond with patience instead of reacting the way I did.
I regret the way things unfolded and the role I played in causing that hurt. You deserve someone who treats your feelings importantly, and I’m sorry I didn’t do that in that moment.
I’m truly sorry for hurting you. I care about you more than I sometimes express, and I hate knowing that my actions caused you pain. I hope in time I can show you that I’m capable of learning from this and doing better.
I’m truly sorry for everything I’ve done to hurt you. I realise now that my words and actions may have made you feel unappreciated or unheard, and that was never my intention. You mean so much to me, and I never want to take your love or patience for granted. I promise to listen more, care more, and be the person you deserve.
I want to apologise from the bottom of my heart for the times I’ve failed you. I know my distance, my mistakes, and the moments I wasn’t fully present may have caused you pain, and I feel awful about it. You are the most important person in my life, and I will do everything I can to make sure you feel loved, heard, and valued every single day.
I’m sorry for hurting you and not being the partner you needed. I know I let my own distractions and flaws get in the way, and I regret it deeply. You’ve given me so much love and patience, and I want to repay that by being more attentive, more caring, and more present in every moment we share. Please forgive me.
I realise I’ve made mistakes that have hurt you, and I feel terrible about it. I didn’t mean to make you feel alone or unimportant, and I hate that I did. You are my heart, my love, and my safe place, and I want to show you every day that I cherish you. I promise to be better, to listen more, and to always be there for you.
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Heartfelt Apology Message for Her
Your words need to come straight from the heart. A heartfelt apology messages t for her is ideal for when you want to get vulnerable and show her how badly you want to make things right.
I’ve spent a lot of time reflecting on what happened, and the truth is, I hate that my actions caused you pain. You are someone I deeply care about, and knowing I hurt you sits heavily on my heart. I’m truly sorry, and I hope in time I can prove that I’m capable of being more thoughtful and deserving of your trust.
Hurting you is the last thing I ever wanted to do, yet somehow my actions led us here. I’m deeply sorry for the pain I caused. You’ve always deserved patience, understanding, and care from me, and I regret the moment I failed to give you that.
The hardest part about this is knowing that the person I hurt is someone who has always meant so much to me. I wish I could go back and handle everything differently, but since I can’t, the only thing I can offer now is a sincere apology and the promise to learn from this mistake.
I understand if you’re angry or disappointed in me. You have every right to feel the way you do. I’m deeply sorry for my actions and for the way they made you feel. You deserve honesty, kindness, and respect from me, and I regret not showing that when it mattered most.
I’ve been thinking about the situation over and over, and the truth is I wish I had chosen my words and actions more carefully. You deserved better from me, and I’m deeply sorry for letting you down.
There’s nothing easy about admitting that I was wrong, but I know it’s necessary. I’m sorry for hurting you and for not being the person you needed me to be in that moment. I care about you more than my mistake may have shown.
What hurts me most is knowing that my actions made you question how much you mean to me. The truth is that you matter more than I sometimes know how to express, and I’m deeply sorry for making you feel otherwise.
I regret the way I handled things, and I regret the pain it caused you even more. You’ve always been someone I respect and care about deeply, and the thought of losing your trust is something that truly scares me.
I know an apology can’t instantly fix everything, but I want you to know that I genuinely mean it. I’m sorry for hurting you and for not being more mindful of your feelings.
I hate that my actions created distance between us. You’re someone I value deeply, and it pains me to know that I caused the hurt that stands between us now. I’m sincerely sorry.
I’ve taken time to think about everything that happened, and I realise how unfair my actions were to you. You deserved patience and understanding, not the hurt I caused. I’m deeply sorry for that.
I know I disappointed you, and that’s something I take seriously. You’ve always shown me care and support, and I regret the moment I didn’t return that same energy.
The truth is that you mean more to me than my actions showed. I’m sorry for letting my emotions and poor judgment hurt someone I care about so deeply.
I understand if forgiveness doesn’t come easily right now. All I want you to know is that my apology is genuine, and I regret the pain my actions caused you.
I’m sorry for the hurt I caused and for the way my actions affected you. You deserve someone who listens, understands, and treats your feelings with care.
I know trust takes time to rebuild, and I regret the moment I gave you a reason to question mine. I’m truly sorry and willing to do the work to make things right.
When I think about what happened, I realise how much I should have handled things differently. I’m deeply sorry for the pain I caused and for not being more considerate of your feelings.
I care about you more than my actions might have suggested, and that’s why this situation weighs so heavily on me. I’m sorry for hurting you and for the disappointment I caused.
I regret the moment I allowed my actions to hurt someone who has always mattered to me. You deserved kindness and respect from me.
I know apologies don’t erase pain overnight, but I hope you can see that my words come from a place of genuine regret.
I wish I could undo the moment that caused you pain, but since I can’t, the best I can do is take responsibility and offer you my sincere apology.
You deserve honesty, care, and respect from the people in your life, especially from me. I’m deeply sorry for not living up to that in the moment.
Forgive me for my mistakes, love. I never want to make you feel anything less than cherished.
My love, I’m truly sorry for hurting you. I never meant to make you feel unappreciated or unseen. You mean everything to me, and I promise to listen and love you better every single day.
I know I’ve made mistakes, and it breaks my heart to think I caused you pain. Please forgive me, my love. You are the most important part of my life, and I’ll do everything I can to make it right.
I’m sorry for the moments I let you down or made you feel alone. My heart belongs to you, and I want to be the person who lifts you, hears you, and cherishes you always.
Not every apology has to be heavy. Sometimes a little humor can help break the tension, and that’s where a funny apology message for her can work wonders. It adds a bit of levity to your apology, while still showing you care.
They say love is patient and kind, right? Well, I hope you’re feeling extra loving today. I’m sorry, my love!
You know, when I make a mistake, I really go all in. I’m very sorry.
I’m sorry. Clearly, I need to be supervised by a responsible adult.
I’m really sorry about the things I said earlier. In my defence, I was extremely hungry… but still very wrong.
I messed up badly. Please accept my apology and this peace offering in the form of food.
Honestly, you’re the best, and I’m the worst. I’m so sorry for what I did.
I must have been tired or hungry when I said that… but either way, I’m sorry.
After carefully replaying our fight, it turns out you were right and I was completely wrong. I apologise.
I’m not saying I was wrong, but I am buying you food, so let’s call it even?
I know that I hurt you, but please know that I did it for one reason…I’m an idiot. Please forgive me.
Nobody’s perfect. But today I went out of my way to prove that point. I’m sorry for what I said.
I’m sorry for the big mistake I made, and for all the other small ones it reminded you of.
I’m sorry for being as observant as a rock today. Clearly, my brain took the day off.
I know I can be a bit annoying sometimes. I’m sorry, and I promise I’ll try to do better. I love you.
Roses are red, violets are blue, I messed up today, but I still love you.
Me: Says something dumb. My brain: ‘Why are you like this?’ Also me: Writing this apology text.
I apologise for being about as helpful as a broken google map today. I’ll try to be better next time.
Some things really should stay inside your head. Unfortunately, I realised that after I had already said them. I’m sorry.
Even the people we love most can feel hurt by our words or actions. An apology message for her after hurting her feelings will help express your regret for causing her pain.
I’m really sorry for hurting your feelings. Looking back, I realise my words came across harsher than I intended. You didn’t deserve that, and I regret not being more thoughtful in that moment.
I hate knowing that something I said or did made you feel upset. Your feelings matter to me more than I showed, and I’m truly sorry for the hurt I caused.
I realise now that my words affected you deeply, and that’s something I genuinely regret. You deserve kindness and understanding from me, not pain.
I’m sorry for the way I handled things. I should have listened more carefully and spoken with more care. Hurting your feelings was never something I wanted to do.
I regret the way my actions made you feel. You didn’t deserve to feel dismissed or hurt, and I’m truly sorry for not considering your feelings properly.
I’m really sorry for the pain my words caused you. I should have paused, listened, and thought more carefully before speaking.
I know I hurt your feelings, and that’s something I take seriously. I care about you and never want to be the reason you feel upset.
I’m sorry for making you feel unappreciated. You mean a lot to me, and I regret the moment my actions made you feel otherwise.
Looking back, I wish I had handled things differently. I’m sorry for hurting your feelings and for not being more sensitive to how my words might affect you.
I hate knowing that something I did made you feel sad or disappointed. You deserve patience and understanding from me, and I’m sorry I didn’t show that.
I’m sorry for not recognising how much my words would hurt you. If I could go back and say things differently, I absolutely would.
I regret speaking without thinking about how it would make you feel. Your feelings should have mattered more in that moment.
I know apologies don’t erase the hurt immediately, but I want you to know I’m sincerely sorry for upsetting you.
I’m sorry for the misunderstanding and the hurt it caused. I should have taken the time to explain myself better instead of letting things affect you the way they did.
I feel terrible knowing I hurt someone I care about. Please know that I’m genuinely sorry and that your feelings matter deeply to me.
I should have been more mindful of how my words might come across. I’m sorry for hurting your feelings and for not showing more care.
You didn’t deserve the way that situation unfolded. I’m truly sorry for the hurt and confusion my actions caused.
I’m sorry for letting my emotions get the best of me. I should have handled things with more patience and understanding.
I regret the moment I made you feel anything less than valued. Hurting your feelings was never my intention.
I care about you deeply, which is why it hurts to know that I’m the one who caused you pain. I’m truly sorry.
I wish I had taken a moment to think before speaking. I’m sorry for the way my words affected you.
I’m sorry for the hurt I caused and for not recognising it sooner. Your feelings matter, and I regret the moment I made you feel otherwise.
I’m truly sorry for hurting your feelings. I never meant to make you feel anything less than loved and cherished, and I promise to be more mindful of your heart from now on.
I feel awful for the pain I caused you. Please forgive me, my love — I never want to be the reason for your tears or sadness, and I’ll do everything I can to make it right.
I regret the way my words and actions affected you. You mean so much to me, and I’m deeply sorry for causing you hurt. I promise to listen, understand, and care for you better.
Apology Messages for Her After Lying or Breaking Trust
Trust is fragile, and once broken, it takes a lot of effort to repair. An apology message for her after lying or breaking her trust allows you acknowledge your mistakes and show you’re committed to being more honest.
I’m truly sorry for lying to you and breaking the trust we built. I know I hurt you, and it pains me to see the disappointment in your eyes. I promise to be open and trustworthy from now on because you mean everything to me.
I regret betraying your trust and causing you pain. I was wrong, and I take full responsibility for my actions. Please forgive me. I promise to do whatever it takes to rebuild the love and trust between us.
I know I’ve hurt you by not being truthful, and I hate that I let my mistakes come between us. You deserve honesty and respect always, and I’m sorry for failing you. I promise to earn your trust back, step by step.
I’m sorry for breaking your trust and making you doubt my love. You are my heart, and I never want to cause you pain. I vow to be open, sincere, and dependable from now on.
I feel terrible for lying and hurting the person I love most. I know I’ve shaken your trust, but I’m ready to make things right and prove every day that I am worthy of your love and faith in me.
I know that the hardest part of what I did isn’t just the mistake itself but the fact that it broke your trust. I’m deeply sorry for lying to you. You deserved honesty from me, and I regret not giving you that.
I wish I could undo the moment I chose dishonesty over truth. I know trust is fragile, and I hate that I’m the reason it’s been damaged between us. I’m truly sorry.
I understand that it’s not easy to trust someone again after they’ve lied. I take responsibility for my actions, and I’m sincerely sorry for the hurt and doubt I caused you.
I know my lie hurt you more than I realised in the moment. You trusted me, and I broke that trust. I’m deeply sorry and willing to do whatever it takes to rebuild what I damaged.
I regret not being honest with you from the start. You deserved the truth, and I’m sorry for choosing the easier path instead of the right one.
I hate that my actions made you question my honesty. You should never have had to doubt me, and I’m truly sorry for putting you in that position.
I know that trust takes time to build and only seconds to break. I regret the moment I made a choice that hurt you and put that trust at risk.
I’m sorry for the lie and for the disappointment it brought into our relationship. You deserved honesty, and I regret failing you in that way.
I can’t change what happened, but I want you to know that I’m genuinely sorry for betraying your trust. I hope one day I can earn it back through honesty and consistency.
I regret the moment I decided not to tell you the truth. It was unfair to you, and I’m deeply sorry for the pain it caused.
I know apologies don’t immediately repair broken trust, but I want you to know that I take responsibility for my mistake. I’m sincerely sorry.
I hate knowing that my actions created doubt between us. You deserved transparency and honesty, and I’m sorry for not giving you that.
I’m sorry for the lie and the way it made you feel. You’ve always been honest with me, and I regret not showing you the same respect.
I know rebuilding trust takes time, patience, and real effort. I’m ready to put in that effort because I truly regret hurting you.
I wish I had been brave enough to tell you the truth instead of hiding it. I’m deeply sorry for the pain that decision caused you.
I know my actions made you question my sincerity, and I understand why. I’m truly sorry for breaking your trust.
I regret that my dishonesty created distance between us. You deserved the truth, and I’m sorry for not being upfront with you.
I understand if you need time to process everything. All I want you to know right now is that I’m genuinely sorry for lying and for the hurt it caused.
I know I let you down by not being honest. That’s something I take seriously, and I’m deeply sorry for the pain my actions caused you.
I hate that my mistake put our relationship in this position. I’m truly sorry for betraying your trust and for the disappointment it brought.
I know trust isn’t something that can be repaired overnight. All I can promise is honesty going forward and genuine effort to rebuild what I damaged.
Thoughtful Apology Messages for Her After Not Listening
Sometimes, we fail to give the people we love our full attention, and it hurts more than we realise. An apology message for her after not listening will help express your regret and show that you truly value her words and feelings.
I’m so sorry for not really listening to you. You mean the world to me, and I want to hear everything you have to say.
I hate that I let my mind wander when you were speaking. You deserve my full attention, always.
I’m sorry for not being there with you in that moment. I promise to listen properly next time.
I feel awful for not hearing you out. Your thoughts and feelings matter to me more than anything.
I’m sorry for making you feel ignored. I never want you to feel that way again.
I realise I wasn’t really listening, and I’m truly sorry. You deserve someone who’s fully present for you.
I hate that I missed what you were trying to tell me. I’ll do better, I promise.
I’m sorry for not paying attention when you needed me. I want to be someone you can always count on to listen.
I feel terrible for letting you feel unheard. Please forgive me. I want to listen with my heart as well as my ears.
I wasn’t listening like I should, and it makes me sad knowing I hurt you. I’m sorry, love.
I’m sorry for not catching your words when they mattered most. I want to hear you, always.
I realise I wasn’t really there for you. I’m sorry, and I’ll make sure it doesn’t happen again.
I hate that I let you feel invisible. You deserve to be fully heard, and I promise to listen better.
I’m sorry for not giving you my full attention. You are important to me, and I’ll show it every day.
I hate that I made you feel unheard. I’ll do better, because you deserve nothing less.
I’m sorry for not being present with you. You are my priority, and I’ll show it by listening.
I regret not listening when it mattered. I love you and I want to hear everything you feel.
I’m sorry for letting my distractions get in the way. From now on, my ears and my heart are all yours.
I’m sorry for not really listening when you spoke. I realise now how much you needed me to hear you, and I promise to give you my full attention from now on.
I feel terrible for letting my mind wander while you were sharing your thoughts. You deserve someone who listens with their heart, and I want to be that person for you.
I’m sorry for not being present when you needed me. Your words matter deeply to me, and I’ll make sure to truly listen every time.
Forgive me for not understanding you the way I should have. I want to hear you, feel with you, and be here for you in every way.
I hate that I made you feel unheard. Please know I value every word you say, and I promise to listen with care and love from now on.
I’m sorry for drifting away when you wanted me to listen. I want to be fully here for you.
I feel awful for not really hearing you. Please forgive me, I want to understand you better.
I’m sorry for missing the meaning behind your words. Your heart matters to me, and I’ll pay closer attention.
Distance, whether emotional or physical, can make the heart feel lonely. An apology messages for her after being distant is a way to bridge that gap. These messages will help you show her that you’re ready to be present and attentive again.
I’m sorry for pulling away lately. You mean so much to me, and I never want my distance to make you feel unloved.
I hate that I’ve been distant. Please know it’s never about you. I just lost myself for a moment.
I’m sorry for not being close to you like I should. I want to be here, fully, for you again.
I regret my distance and the space I’ve created between us. You are my world, and I don’t want you to feel forgotten.
I’m sorry for shutting you out. I want to reconnect and show you how much you mean to me.
I feel awful for being distant. You deserve my love and attention, and I’ll make sure you get it.
I know I’ve been distant, and I’m sorry. I want to be present in your life and in your heart.
I’m sorry for not being as close as I should. I’ve missed you more than I can say.
I hate that I’ve made you feel alone. I promise to be more open and near to you from now on.
I’m sorry for my distance. You’re everything to me, and I’ll do better at showing it.
I regret being quiet and distant lately. I love you, and I want to make it right.
I’m sorry for not being the partner you needed these past days. I’m here now, and I want to stay close.
I know I’ve seemed far away, and I feel terrible. Please let me make it up to you with my attention and care.
I’m sorry for the space I’ve put between us. You are precious to me, and I’ll be more present.
I hate that my distance hurt you. You deserve someone who is always near, and I want to be that person.
I’m sorry for retreating when you needed me. I promise to be here with you, fully, from now on.
I know my distance must have been painful. I want to close that gap and be with you like I should.
I’m sorry for seeming cold or far away. My heart has always been with you, even when I faltered.
I regret making you feel lonely with my distance. I’ll make it right by being more present and loving.
I’m sorry for being distant. I want to hold you close and make sure you always feel cherished.
I hate that I made you feel second to my silence. You are my priority, and I’ll show it every day.
I’m sorry for the distance I created. You mean everything to me, and I promise to be closer to you from now on.
I’m sorry for pulling away and making you feel alone. You are the most important person in my life, and I want to be close to you again.
I’m sorry for the coldness and distance I’ve shown. My heart has always been with you, and I’ll do everything I can to show you that every day.
I’m truly sorry for being distant lately. You deserve my love and attention, and I promise to be more present and attentive from now on.
I hate that I made you feel unimportant by being distant. You mean everything to me, and I want to make it right by being closer to you.
How To Craft an Apology Message for Her That Feels Sincere
A meaningful apology shows that you understand how your actions affected her and that you want to make things right. If you want your apology message to her to feel honest, follow these simple steps.
Step 1: Acknowledge what you did wrong
The first step to a sincere apology is being honest about your mistake. Clearly acknowledge what you did and how it may have hurt her feelings. Avoid being vague or pretending nothing happened.
Examples:
“I’m sorry for not listening to you earlier. I realise that made you feel unheard.”
“I shouldn’t have said that to you. I understand why it hurt you.”
Step 2: Avoid excuses or shifting blame
A genuine apology focuses on taking responsibility, not defending yourself. Owning your mistake shows maturity and respect for her feelings.
Examples:
“There’s no excuse for how I acted, and I take full responsibility.”
“I was wrong, and I’m truly sorry.”
Step 3: Express your regret clearly
Let her know that you truly regret the pain or disappointment you caused. Be sincere and speak from the heart.
Example:
“I regret what happened, and I wish I could take it back.”
Step 4: Promise to do better
An apology becomes more meaningful when you show that you’re willing to change. Explain what you will do differently moving forward.
Examples:
“I’ll make a real effort to listen better and be more present.”
“I want to rebuild the trust I damaged, and I’m ready to work on it.”
Step 5: Give her space and show it through actions
After apologising, give her the chance to express how she feels by listening without interrupting. Small gestures like deep love messages for her, kind actions, or simply being more attentive can help prove that your apology is sincere.
Every week, Zikoko spotlights the unfiltered stories of women navigating life, love, identity and everything in between.
What She Said will give women the mic to speak freely, honestly and openly, without shame about sex, politics, family, survival, and everything else life throws our way.
Farida*, 34, moved into her older brother’s home at 29 to get her footing in a new city. What she didn’t expect was to fall into something with his wife.
Tell us about yourself.
My name is Farida, I’m 34, and I work in communications. I grew up in Abuja, but I’ve been in Germany for about two years now. It still surprises me sometimes when I say that out loud. Germany. Like, of all the places.
What was your family like growing up?
My parents were comfortable; we weren’t rolling in it, but we genuinely never lacked. We travelled, I went to good schools, life was fine. They had three of us: my older sister Zainab*, who’s 47 now; my brother Idris*, who’s 45; and me, the baby. There are sixteen years between Idris and I, which sounds like a lot, and it is, but it also means he always felt more like a second parent than a brother. In the best way, sha. He was never overbearing. He just showed up for me, financially, emotionally, whatever it was. When I needed school fees topped up, or I had a problem I didn’t want to bring to our parents, he was the one.
And your parents?
They passed within a couple of years of each other. My mum first, then my dad. I was in my early twenties when it happened. It was one of the hardest periods of my life, obviously. Idris stepped up even more after that. He made sure I knew I wasn’t alone. Zainab has always kind of lived in her own world. She loves us, but she’s not really the present type, never really around. So it was mostly Idris. The estate and everything they left behind were distributed among the three of us. I still have the family house in Abuja. I haven’t sold it. I don’t think I ever will.
So you and your brother were very close. It must have been nice.
Very. And the age gap, as I said, meant things between us were never strained the way sibling relationships with smaller gaps can get. I wasn’t competing with him for anything. He wasn’t trying to one-up me. It was just easy. He adored me, and I adored him, and it was one of those things I always just assumed would remain constant.
What happened?
I’d gotten a new job in Lagos. It was good with the best pay in my life at that time. I’d been going back and forth on it, though; I had a whole life in Abuja, my routines, my friends, but ultimately, the opportunity made sense. Idris was in Lagos with his wife, and his house wasn’t far from my office, so when I mentioned I was looking at places, he didn’t let me finish the sentence. He said I had five years with him if I wanted them, and even after that, I was welcome. That is just who he is.
This was a good thing, right?
Yes, and I was grateful. Rent in Lagos is diabolical. But I was also a bit apprehensive.
Why?
I had not really spent much time with his wife. After they got married, I visited here and there, birthdays, things like that, but I was never one of those sisters-in-law who’s always in her brother’s house. Part of it was practical; I had my own life in Abuja. But honestly, part of it was Atinuke.*
There was something about her that always made me a little… I want to say ‘uncomfortable,’ but that’s not quite right either. She just unsettled me in a way I couldn’t name. She’s half Yoruba, half German, grew up a lot in Germany, very composed, very internal. She wasn’t warm in the way I was used to women showing warmth. She was just… still. And it used to read as coldness to me, and I just assumed we’d never really click. She’s also only four years older than me, at the time, 33 to my 29, which always felt a bit strange when I thought about it too hard. So I kept my visits short.
And when you moved in?
I basically set up my own little world. They had a boys’ quarters that was actually a proper self-contained apartment, its own entrance, its own kitchen, everything. I took that. So I was on the property, but I wasn’t in their faces, and they weren’t in mine. I saw Idris pretty much daily. A quick check-in, sometimes dinner, sometimes we’d just sit and talk. Atinuke, I barely saw. Which suited me, honestly.
So what changed?
Idris, ironically. He noticed that his wife and his sister basically coexisted without speaking, and it bothered him. He’s one of those people who needs the people he loves to love each other. So he started engineering small things, “Atinuke is going to the market, go with her.” “The two of you should go and see this new place.” You know how it is. He wasn’t even subtle about it.
At first, I went along to keep him happy and kept my internal distance. But Atinuke, when you actually talk to her, she’s funny. She’ll say something with a completely straight face, and it’ll take you a few seconds to realise she just said something hilarious. And she was genuinely curious about me, not just a necessary talk. She asked real questions. She actually listened. I started looking forward to being around each other.
When did you notice something was shifting?
I think I started noticing things before I let myself admit what I was noticing. It was the smallest things. The way she’d look at me for a second too long. A hand on my shoulder when she walked past. When I talked, she was fully, entirely facing me. I’d feel something and immediately talk myself out of it. Like, this is your brother’s wife. This is your brother’s wife. I said it to myself like a prayer.
But the feelings were growing with or without my permission.
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We’d gone out, just the two of us, Idris had something work-related, and we ended up back at the house late. We’d had drinks, we were laughing about something, the whole energy was loose and warm, and then we were just… closer than we’d been before. And she kissed me. Or I kissed her. Honestly, I couldn’t tell who moved first, and I’ve thought about it many times. But it happened. It was one of those things where she was the only thing that mattered in that moment.
And then I remembered where I was. Who I was in that house. I pulled away and went to my room and sat on the floor, and just breathed. My heart was going crazy.
What were you feeling?
Pure chaos. There was no version of that moment that was okay. She was married to my brother. My brother, who opened his home to me. I also, and this is the part I hadn’t really sat with, I’d never been with a woman before. I’d never really let myself think about it. So now I’m dealing with both things at the same time. What just happened, and what does this mean about me? It was a lot to be on the floor at midnight.
Had you ever had feelings for a woman before?
I think… yes? In the vague, unexamined way, where you notice someone and don’t interrogate the noticing. I went to a girls’ boarding school, and there were crushes that I filed away as “close friendships” in my head. I liked boys, too. I dated boys, so I just never really pushed on it. Nigeria, you know. You don’t push on things you don’t have to push on.
After that night, what happened between you two?
We avoided each other. She seemed to want to pretend it didn’t happen as much as I did, and that helped, briefly. But then Idris planned a whole family Sunday outing, his idea, obviously, and suddenly we’re in public together, sitting next to each other, and she looks at me and just… the whole thing comes back. We started talking again that day. And she told me, directly, plainly, that she was gay.
How did she explain being married to your brother?
She said Idris was a good man. That she loved him, genuinely, just not in that way. In Nigeria, you find a good man, and you build something safe. She wasn’t the first person to make that calculation, and she knew it. He knew it, too, she said, and they had an arrangement she didn’t get into too much detail about, but the word she used was ” an understanding.” She said she’d never acted on anything since they got married. That was the first time in ten years that she’d felt something she couldn’t manage from a distance.
That’s a lot of information to receive.
It really was. I sat with it for weeks. I wasn’t naive; I knew marriages like hers existed, I’d heard of them. But to be in it, to be the one being told this by my brother’s wife in his house while he’s inside cooking, it was surreal. And I was still trying to figure out my own feelings about women, about her, about what I actually wanted. I kept going back and forth. Days when I avoided her completely. Days when I’d find a reason to knock on the main house just to see her.
What happened next?
We…started an affair months after that first kiss. I resisted for longer than people probably expect. Not out of indifference, but because I could see clearly what it would cost. I knew what I was standing in front of. Eventually, I stopped fighting it. We continued our secret relationship for years.
What did those years actually look like?
Normal, on the surface. That’s the part that’s hard to explain. We had inside jokes. We’d cook together sometimes when Idris was travelling. She started telling me more about Germany, not just the country but how she’d grown up, what she missed about it, what she didn’t. There were days it felt like the most natural thing in the world, and then Idris would walk into a room, and that thing would crash back down on me. Guilt is like an unwanted companion that never fucking leaves. You almost get used to carrying it, and then something reminds you of its weight, and you feel it all over again.
For how long did it go on?
Two and a half years, almost three. And this was all in his house. I want to be clear about that because I don’t think I should dress it up. It was in his house, under his roof, while he was doing nothing but being good to both of us. That’s the part that stays with me.
He noticed something had changed between us, in that we were suddenly close, but he read it as the thing he’d wanted: his wife and his sister finally bonding. It made him happy. That made it worse, you know. He was actively grateful that we were getting along. I’d catch him looking pleased, and I’d want to disappear into the floor.
Did he eventually find out?
Yes.
How?
My sister, Zainab. She came to visit once, not a long trip, just passing through Lagos, and she saw us in a moment. Nothing explicit, but she knew. My sister has always been perceptive. She didn’t say anything to me in front of Atinuke; she just went quiet. Later, she found me alone and told me I needed to end it immediately. That she would not watch me destroy Idris’s life. I didn’t listen. I should have listened.
I think she debated it for a while before she told him. But eventually she told him.
What happened when he found out?
I don’t want to be dramatic, but it was the worst day of my life. Idris is not a shouting person. He’s measured, always. So there was no big explosion. It was quieter and worse than that. He looked at me like I was someone he didn’t know. He didn’t want to believe it at first; there was a whole lot of denial, but he knew his wife’s sexual orientation, and when he looked at me, I could not lie. I saw his heart break. It was like he was looking at a stranger who had been wearing my face. That image hasn’t left me.
He asked me to leave the house that same day. I went to a hotel. Atinuke and I didn’t speak for months after that. She and Idris separated and then eventually divorced. Zainab stopped answering my calls. I went back to Abuja and just…floated for a while.
Tell me more about that period. The fallout.
I was so alone. Not just loneliness, I’ve been lonely before, but like something structural had been removed. Idris had been the person I called for everything, big and small, my whole life. And now I couldn’t call him. Zainab had made her choice clear. Friends knew something had happened, but not what, because how do you explain that? The family house in Abuja suddenly felt like a place I was haunting rather than living in. I’d walk through it and just feel the absence of everyone who was supposed to be in my life.
I wasn’t eating well. I wasn’t sleeping well. I was going to work and coming home and sitting in silence, and trying to figure out who I even was outside of this thing I’d done and the people I’d lost. There was also, underneath all of it, still this question about myself that I hadn’t fully answered. Who I was, what I wanted, whether any of it had been real or just a terrible mistake. I was 31 and besides savings, starting from nothing in a way I hadn’t been since my parents died.
That must have felt impossible to deal with. I am sorry.
Thank you.
What happened next? Did things change?
Yes. Maybe 9/10ish months later, Atinuke called me. I didn’t pick up the first time, or the second. The third time I did, and we just sat on the phone in silence for a while before either of us said anything. After that, we started talking regularly, mostly late at night when we’d both given up on sleeping. She was in Germany by then, back with her family there. We talked for months like that before we saw each other in person. She came back to Nigeria for something, family business on her Yoruba side, and we met. That was the first time I’d seen her since everything fell apart. We sat in a restaurant for four hours. I think we both knew by the end of it. She was meant for me and I for her.
And your family?
They’re not talking to me. Idris, Zainab and the extended people who found out. None of them. It’s been three years. I still send Idris messages sometimes. Not asking for forgiveness exactly, I think I’ve accepted that’s not something I get to ask for on my own timeline, if ever. More, just keeping the line open from my end. Letting him know I’m still his sister, even if he’s not ready to let me be. He never replies. I don’t even know if he reads them. Someone told me recently that he’s been spending a lot of time in Dubai and that he has a friend there he’s very close to. I don’t ask too many questions. I just hope he’s okay. I hope he’s happy, actually happy, in whatever way works for him.
Do you regret it?
I regret how it happened completely. I regret the betrayal, I regret the years I spent in that house, lying by omission to a man who only ever loved me. I don’t think I regret her or what we have now. And those two things live together in me very uncomfortably.
What do you want people to take from this?
I’m not sure I want anything specific. I’m not here to be a cautionary tale, and I’m not here to be defended either. I just wanted to say it out loud and in full. Because I’ve been carrying it quietly for a long time, and quiet was starting to feel like its own kind of lie.
HERtitude 2026 is happening this April, and the theme is Main Character Energy. Get your tickets here: hertitude.zikoko.com
GridLocked is a daily pop culture guessing game built for Nigerians. Every weekday by 9am, you’ll get six clues, sixty seconds, and an answer only a Nigerian would know.
Today’s GridLocked is a company.
How many clues do you need to get it right? 👀
Share your result when done, but don’t spoil the answer for others. (Missed yesterday’s GridLocked? Play it here.)
11 March 2026
Guess The Company01:00
Title
Guesses: 0
00:00
How To Play
The Goal: Guess the answer for the day before time runs out. (The answer could be a person, place, song, movie, or even slang.)
The Lock: You cannot type a guess until you have revealed at least one tile.
The Reveal: Tap any tile to reveal a clue. Every clue on the grid describes the answer for the day.
The Clock: You have 60 seconds to guess right. The timer starts the moment you flip your first tile. (You get multiple guesses.)
The Score: ⬜ (White) = A tile you flipped 🟪 (Purple) = A tile you kept hidden.
Best Result = ⬜🟪🟪🟪🟪🟪 | Guesses: 1 (Only needed one clue and one guess to get it right)
Come back every weekday by 9am for a new grid or subscribe to Z Daily, Zikoko’s daily newsletter, to get new GridLocked puzzles, real Nigerian stories and other fun content in your inbox.
How to Play GridLocked
The Goal: Guess the answer for the day before time runs out. (The answer could be a Nigerian person, place, song, movie, or even slang.)
The Lock: You cannot type a guess until you have revealed at least one tile (clue).
The Reveal: Tap any tile to reveal a clue. Every clue describes the answer for the day. The fewer tiles you flip, the better.
The Clock: You have 60 seconds to guess right. The timer starts the moment you flip your first tile. (You get multiple guesses.)
The GridLocked Squares: What Do They Mean?
When the game ends, you see your guess count, total time spent, and the number of tiles flipped. The tiles are shown as white and purple squares.
⬜ (White) = A tile you flipped
🟪 (Purple) = A tile you left closed
The fewer white tiles you have, the better your result.
Best Result = ⬜🟪🟪🟪🟪🟪 | Guesses: 1 (Only needed oneclue and oneguess to get it right)
If you’ve ever felt like a failure, just remember, Nigeria has a whole ministry dedicated to reducing poverty. Since the Ministry of Humanitarian Affairs and Poverty Reduction was created in 2019, another 60 million Nigerians have dropped below the poverty line.
To make matters worse, economic experts say poverty levels will only get worse. We don’t expect much from government bodies. The bar is already on the floor. But this Ministry is spectacularly failing in its mandate, and it leaves us wondering: who’s to blame?
Born again… and again… and again…
The Ministry didn’t always go by its current name. When President Muhammadu Buhari created it in August 2019, it was called the Ministry of Humanitarian Affairs, Disaster Management and Social Development.
Then in 2023, President Bola Tinubu renamed it the Ministry of Humanitarian Affairs and Poverty Alleviation. By 2024, he changed it again to what we now know as the Ministry of Humanitarian Affairs and Poverty Reduction.
Numbers go up… and only up
The name changes haven’t helped. Whether it’s supposed to alleviate or reduce poverty, the Ministry is doing neither.
And things are not looking brighter. In January 2026, PricewaterhouseCoopers (PwC) predicted 141 million Nigerians—about 62% of the population—would be poor this year. That’s another 2 million people about to drop below the poverty line.
Best in mathematics
Whenever faced with numbers that show they’re failing, Tinubu’s administration doesn’t fix up. Instead, they say the maths must be wrong.
Sunday Dare, Special Adviser to the President on Media & Public Communication
So when the World Bank dropped the 139 million figure, Tinubu’s Special Adviser on Media and Public Communication, Sunday Dare, dismissed it as “unrealistic.”
The administration argued that the World Bank’s benchmark of anyone living on less than $2.15 a day doesn’t match Nigeria’s reality. Basically, the government wants global experts to lower their expectations so our numbers look better.
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Musical chairs at the poverty ministry
L-R: Sadiya Umar Farouq, Muhammadu Buhari
When Buhari created the ministry in 2019, he appointed Sadiya Umar Farouq as minister. She held the role until the end of his administration in 2023. Since Tinubu became president, though, it’s been a revolving door.
August 2023: Betta Edu became minister.
January 2024: Less than five months later, Edu was suspended over a ₦585 million corruption case.
January–October 2024: The office stayed empty for more than eight months.
October 2024: Nentawe Yilwatda took over as minister.
November 2024: Yusuf Tanko Sununu was moved from the Ministry of Education to become Minister of State for Humanitarian Affairs and Poverty Reduction, assisting Yilwatda.
July 2025: Nine months later, Yilwatda left to become APC national chairman.
July–November 2025: Sununu worked solo for about four months.
November 2025: Bernard Mohammed Doro was sworn in as minister.
It’s been a rocky ride at the Ministry under Tinubu’s administration, with multiple name changes and even more changes in personnel. With ministers playing musical chairs, it’s no surprise the Ministry can’t pull off any coherent poverty alleviation scheme.
Sadiya
Sadiya Umar Farouq
Sadiya Umar Farouq may have held her position for all of Buhari’s second term, but that stability didn’t count for anything. As we said earlier, the poverty numbers jumped from 40.1% to 56.2% between 2019 and 2023. Then there’s the missing billions.
First through the door after Tinubu took office was Betta Edu. In August 2023, she was sworn in as Minister of Humanitarian Affairs and Poverty Alleviation at just 37 years old.
But her time was short-lived. Barely four months later, in January 2024, she came under fire after a letter surfaced showing she had asked the Accountant General to transfer ₦585 million meant for grants for vulnerable groups into a private account. Tinubu suspended her on January 8, and by October 2024, she was replaced by Nentawe Yilwatda.
Nentawe Yilwatda lasted a little longer than Edu before being elected National Chairman of the All Progressives Congress (APC) in July 2025, forcing him to quit his ministerial role.
As the numbers show, having two ministers didn’t help either.
After Yilwatda left to chair the APC, Sununu flew solo for a few months before Bernard Mohammed Doro came in as minister in November 2025. The two have since worked together as a less-than-dynamic duo.
Thou shalt not live by rice alone
Bernard Doro has already hit the ground running in the only way Nigerian politicians know: he’s been out sharing rice.
Officially, office furniture are more important than you
A quick glance at the 2026 budget shows where Doro and Sununu’s priorities lie—and it’s not in reducing poverty.
In the Ministry’s 2026 budget, it plans to spend ₦112 million on office furniture and fittings. Then another ₦113 million on office machines and equipment. Meanwhile, only ₦71 million has been set aside for essential foods in case of emergency outbreaks that may lead to malnutrition in the country. That’s almost four times less than the ₦225 million they’re spending to make their offices look nice.
To fully understand the ridiculousness of the situation, you’d have to take a look at the Global Hunger Index, which ranks Nigeria 115 out of 123 countries. Twenty per cent of the population is undernourished, and almost 34% of children under five suffer stunted growth due to chronic malnutrition. Whatever emergency the ministry is waiting for, we’re already living it.
Millions of Nigerians are falling into poverty every year, and children are literally starving to death. But we can only hope Bernard Doro and Tanko Sununu—or whoever is next through the revolving door—enjoy the luxury office furniture.
Still, there’s something poetic about the malfunctioning “Facts and Statistics” tracker on the Ministry’s site. The irony is almost too perfect.
A Ministry of zero impact, with a website that reflects exactly that.
Screenshot of the Ministry of Humanitarian Affairs and Poverty Reduction Website captured March 9, 2026
What can you do about this?
Use whatever platform you have, including social media, to demand accountability from the Ministry of Humanitarian Affairs and Poverty Reduction.
Call your representatives at the National Assembly (NASS). Lawmakers have to sign off on these budgets, and you can make sure money goes where you know it’s best needed through them. To find the contact information of the lawmaker representing your constituency at NASS, click here.
Ministers are appointees, but they’re appointed by the executive you voted for. So make better choices during elections. Not voting at all is also a choice — and it’s the wrong one.
We want to hear about your personal experiences that reflect how politics or public systems affect daily life in Nigeria. Share your story with us here—we’d love to hear from you!
Zikoko’s HERtitude is back this April 2026. Grab your tickets here.
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Lagos, Nigeria — Global smart device brand OPPO has partnered with Nigerian reality TV star and entrepreneur Mercy Eke to spotlight the newly launched OPPO Reno15 Series, a smartphone designed for modern creators, lifestyle enthusiasts and digital storytellers.
Renowned for her bold personality, glamorous lifestyle and strong digital influence, Mercy Eke embodies the spirit of the Reno series — confident, stylish and always ahead of the curve. Through this collaboration, she showcases how the OPPO Reno15 Series seamlessly blends elegant design with powerful technology, making it the ideal smartphone for capturing life moments in stunning detail.
The Reno15 Series delivers an elevated smartphone experience with advanced camera capabilities, sleek aesthetics, and smooth performance. Built for today’s content-driven generation, the device empowers users to shoot vibrant photos, create engaging videos, and share their stories effortlessly.
Speaking on the collaboration, Mercy Eke expressed excitement about partnering with the brand:
“I love technology that fits my lifestyle, and the Reno15 does exactly that. It’s stylish, powerful, and perfect for capturing my best moments and creating content for my fans.”
The partnership reflects OPPO’s continued commitment to empowering the next generation of creators and innovators across Nigeria by combining cutting-edge technology with lifestyle, fashion and culture.
With Mercy Eke leading the conversation, the launch of the OPPO Reno15 Series represents a new era where technology meets creativity, confidence and everyday self-expression.
The OPPO Reno15 Series is now available nationwide through authorized OPPO retail stores and partner outlets.
Oluchi*(26) and Nonso* (28) first crossed paths at a party, where a moment of kindness brought them together. But as their relationship grew, so did the cracks between them.
In this story, they share how their relationship unfolded and why it eventually fell apart.
Oluchi: I met Nonso* in September 2023 at a party our mutual friend organised. The last thing on my mind that night was meeting someone. I’d only gone out to have a good time.
At some point during the party, I decided to relax and ended up overdoing it with the drinks.
Nonso: “Overdoing it” is putting it lightly. She threw up everywhere.
I knew the house well, and everyone else was busy with the party, so I stepped in to help. I took her to the bathroom and cleaned her up like any decent guy would do.
Oluchi: I was extremely embarrassed and kept apologising, but he stayed calm about it. He told me to lie down and even brought me water.
Kindness always gets my attention, and in that moment, I suddenly realised how attractive he was. I’d noticed him earlier at the party, but helping me like that made him stand out even more.
Nonso: I thought she was cute, but I didn’t think we’d interact beyond that moment.
But the next morning, she came over to thank me before she left. We also exchanged contacts and started talking from there.
Oluchi: From that day, I imagined the possibilities. I hadn’t dated in a while, and Nonso felt like the one. He checked a lot of boxes for me: confident, attractive, and easy to talk to. I fell for him very quickly.
But the first thing that put me off was having our first date at his house.
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Nonso: Actually, that happened because she was in the neighbourhood, and my place wasn’t far from where she was. It wasn’t planned.
We made out a bit, and soon after, she started talking about wanting a relationship. I was caught off guard.
Oluchi: I made it clear I wasn’t interested in casual dating. I didn’t want anyone wasting my time.
When he eventually organised a proper dinner and asked me to be his girlfriend, I was really happy. It felt like things were finally falling into place.
Nonso: To be honest, I didn’t want a relationship that early. We’d only known each other for about two months. But I liked her, and since she made it very clear that was what she wanted, I decided to give it a shot.
Oluchi: We had our good days, until I noticed how he flirted with other women. That was a major red flag.
Whenever we went out, he was always charming and overly friendly with girls. It felt disrespectful, especially when I was right there.
Nonso: I wouldn’t call it flirting. I’m just naturally friendly, and it comes from a deeper place.
Growing up, I struggled with confidence. I was overweight and didn’t have many friends. Now that I look better and people approach me more, shutting them down feels difficult.
But Oluchi always saw my friendliness as something more, and it caused many arguments.
Oluchi: During one of our dates, he made us join two girls in their game and even exchanged numbers with them right in front of me. Who does that?
That moment made me really uncomfortable with his behaviour, so I checked his phone.
Nonso: That was an invasion of my privacy.
She also wasn’t completely innocent. There were times she’d mention guys trying to talk to her or buying things for her, and I never made an issue out of it.
Of course, she didn’t find anything inappropriate because I’d been honest with her.
Oluchi: I mentioned those things to show him how it felt. The difference is that I never crossed the line. He was talking to too many women.
And I don’t regret suspecting him. Months later, he admitted that he’d cheated on me.
Nonso: By that point, our relationship had already grown tense.
She wanted to control everything about me, from my smoking to how I socialised. I started to feel caged, and our fights became more frequent.
We had a big fight around her NYSC POP. She expected me to show up with flowers and gifts, but I didn’t. Instead, I sent her money to get whatever she wanted. She was furious.
What frustrated me was that she never clearly said what she wanted. She expected me to know, like a psychic. When I didn’t, she overreacted.
During one of those periods when we were barely speaking, I went out with friends and made out with someone else.
It wasn’t planned, and I regretted it. I told her about it almost immediately.
Oluchi: He says guilt made him confess, but the truth is that the girl had already told a mutual friend. He knew I was going to find out. I was devastated when he admitted it. But I still stayed.
That was a big mistake. Months later, I discovered he’d cheated again. This time with his ex.
He didn’t tell me immediately. I only found out during a huge argument when we were already close to breaking up.
Nonso: It was more complicated than that. My ex and I had broken up because of distance. When she came back to visit, old attractions resurfaced. It only happened once. I didn’t tell Oluchi immediately because I knew it would hurt her.
Eventually, we had our biggest argument. She called me a cheater and said she was done. I admitted everything, and she walked out. After that, she blocked me everywhere.
Oluchi: We dated for over a year, and I felt like I was constantly defending the relationship and trying to force him to act like he actually wanted to be with me. When I finally walked away, it was for my peace of mind.
Nonso: I respected her decision when she blocked me. About five months later, she agreed to speak to me again through our mutual friend. By then, she’d already started seeing someone else.
Oluchi: I expected him to put in more effort to win me back, but when he didn’t, I realised I had to move on. I wasn’t going to sit around waiting for him. But we eventually agreed to stay friends.
Nonso: I still think she’s a great person and can be a positive influence. We’re probably better off as friends, but who knows what the future holds?
Oluchi: For me, that chapter is closed. But I wish him well.
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Many Nigerian albums are shit on for the mindless nature of their composition, but some albums do more than just provide a soundtrack; they build entire worlds. These albums transcend the standard collection of singles, telling stories, painting worlds, and guiding listeners through cinematic journeys.
From M.I Abaga’s conceptual rap projects to Burna Boy’s globe-spanning African Giant, these albums are more than music; they are movies you can listen to.
10. Gbagada Express — BOJ (2022)
BOJ, one of the architects of the Nigerian alté movement, takes listeners on a journey that reflects on life in Lagos, especially the famous Gbagada axis known for its social life, hustle and cultural syncretism. While not a traditional concept movie album, its brilliant fusion of Afro‑pop, alté, and introspective and fun lyricism evokes a day‑in‑the‑life arc of a person living on Lagos Mainland.
9. A Study on Self-Worth: Yxng Dxznl — M.I Abaga (2018)
Departing from the outward-looking lens of The Chairman and The Rendezvous, this album is a psychological event that invites the listener into M.I’s private therapy sessions. The album uses lengthy, instructional song titles and recurring snippets of a dialogue between M.I and his therapist to navigate themes of depression, ego, and the industry’s toxic expectations.
It’s a deeply immersive character study that uses distorted vocals and moody production to represent the internal clutter of an artist struggling to find himself amidst the noise of fame.
8. Palmwine Express — Show Dem Camp (2019)
Palmwine Express, released in 2019 and produced primarily by Spax, shifts Show Dem Camp’s narrative focus from hard political rap to an immersive, mood‑driven exploration of palm‑wine music’s roots. This project uses an airborne concept, complete with flight announcements, to transport the listener into a world of highlife-infused jams and romantic subplots. Looking at the style that the album takes in its narrative arc, it serves as a travelogue or a road movie centred on the Detty December culture and dating scene in Lagos.
7. African Giant — Burna Boy (2019)
Burna Boy’s African Giant is a mix of personal and socio-political themes that make music with a lens on the Nigerian experience. The album is structured around the transition from personal struggle to global dominance, famously sparked by a climax in his real-life narrative: his outburst over the font size of his name on a Coachella poster, which he used as the catalyst for the album’s title and theme.
African Giant uses skits and samples to ground its message, most notably the 67-second inclusion of a documentary clip in “Another Story” that narrates the commercial origins of Nigeria as a British business deal. By closing the album with “Spiritual,” featuring his mother’s viral BET Awards acceptance speech where she reminds the world that “you were African before anything else,” Burna Boy makes a statement that solidifies the album as a monumental piece of Pan-African storytelling.
6. Jagz Nation Vol. 2: Royal Niger Company — Jesse Jagz (2013)
Jesse Jagz’s Royal Niger Company is an avant-garde epic that blends historical references with cinematic samples from films like Scarface and Johnny Mad Dog. Jesse acts as a philosopher-king, weaving together Jazz, Hip-Hop, Tupac and Fela Kuti samples to create a project that feels more like a cross‑continental historical movie than a standard rap album.
The inclusion of movie dialogue and conversational skits helps build the Jagz Nation mythos, and its orchestral Hip‑Hop and Rastafarian inflections frame Jagz as a renegade figure challenging the conventional boundaries of Nigerian sound and mainstream expectations.
5. Clone Wars Vol. IV: These Buhari Times — Show Dem Camp (2019)
This album was released by rap duo Show Dem Camp as part of their long‑running Clone Wars series. It pairs incisive, vivid lyrical vignettes with sharp commentary on the contemporary Nigerian experience under then‑President Buhari’s administration. This album uses a series of unfiltered lyrical reporting to paint a bleak yet true picture of the City of Excellence, AKA Lagos, and the broader national landscape.
In my opinion, it’s a political thriller that reflects the tension and resilience of the Nigerian people under economic and social pressure.
4. Moral Instruction — Falz (2019)
Moral Instruction sees Falz deploy his fourth studio project, released in January 2019, as a socio‑political audio film. It uses Nigerian Pidgin and samples of Fela Kuti to tell stories about police brutality, hypocrisy, greedy politicians, social media distraction, undermined youth potential and personal responsibility. The album’s cinematic concept was first established by the release of The Curriculum, an eight-minute short film that threads the tracks together through the metaphor of a dysfunctional school system.
The album’s production straddles Hip-Hop and Afrobeat, with tracks ranging from the tragic narrative of “Johnny” to the direct critique of “Talk.” Listening to the album as arranged feels like courtroom drama or episodes in a documentary on Nigeria’s systemic dysfunction.
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3. Subaru Boys: FINAL HEAVEN — Cruel Santino (2022)
Cruel Santino’s sophomore album, Subaru Boys: FINAL HEAVEN, is a sprawling, 21-track sci-fi epic that feels like a high-budget anime or a retro JRPG (Japanese Role-Playing Game) than a regular album. It’s divided into chapters, follows a complex narrative centred on a group of celestial beings known as the Subaru Boys and their journey through a conceptual universe.
Santino crafts this world using heavy world-building elements that include a Santinese (his self-created lingo) and a lore-heavy “Bible” released alongside the album to help listeners navigate the plot. The album’s commitment to its “Final Heaven” theme is unmistakable in its glitchy, futuristic production.
2. What Happens In Lagos — Ajebutter 22 (2017)
Ajebutter 22’s sophomore project is a meticulously curated “day in the life” story of a Lagosian millennial, narrated through the poetic interludes of Koromone Koye. The album tracks the protagonist’s journey from the morning commute at 4:00 AM to the social pressures of rich friends and the eventual status-seeking of “Lagos Big Boy.”
The album operates as a city-sized mirror that shows the irony and packaging of Lagos life with a dry wit and relatability that makes each song feel like scenes from a comedy-drama.
1. MI 2: The Movie — M.I Abaga (2010)
True to its title, M.I Abaga’s second studio album was conceived as a blockbuster film with a narrative structure, M.I act as the protagonist, and the featured artists are credited as co-stars. The project draws heavy inspiration from the Mission: Impossible franchise. We can see from how it utilises the intro, skit performances and action-packed tracks like “Action Film” to establish a thriller atmosphere.
But beyond the impressive structure and flair, it serves as a panoramic lens on Nigeria, from how it brings commercial hits like ”Number 1” with socially conscious songs like “Craze”, about corruption and the unrest in Jos. This album solidifies M.I’s reputation as a master of the concept album.
Forex trading in Nigeria has expanded rapidly over the past decade. While traders previously focused mainly on currency pairs such as EUR/USD or GBP/USD, many platforms now provide access to broader markets, including gold, silver, oil, cocoa, global indices, stock markets, and ETFs.
For Nigerian traders looking for the best forex trading platforms, choosing the right platform often depends on funding options, market access, and trading reliability.
This guide highlights some of the most widely used platforms available to Nigerian traders today.
Key Factors Nigerian Traders Should Consider Before Choosing a Forex Platform
Many traders now prefer platforms that combine forex trading with other global markets.
How Forex Trading Works
Forex trading means exchanging one currency for another.
If the first currency strengthens relative to the second, the price rises. If it weakens, the price falls.
Modern trading platforms also allow traders to access commodities, metals, global indices and stock markets alongside forex.
Best Forex Trading Platforms in Nigeria (2026)
1. Bitget: Universal Exchange (UEX) for Forex, Commodities, Metals and Global Stocks
One of the more recent developments in online trading is the integration of multiple financial markets within a single platform.
Bitget’s Universal Exchange (UEX) model combines both digital and traditional financial markets in one ecosystem.
Instead of maintaining separate accounts for forex brokers, commodity brokers, and stock trading platforms, traders can access different markets through a single interface.
Markets Available on Bitget
Why Multi-Market Trading Is Growing
For many Nigerian traders, diversification requires using multiple platforms. Platforms integrating several markets allow traders to move between different asset classes more efficiently.
For example:
Platforms that integrate these markets simplify the process.
2. Exness: One of Nigeria’s Most Recognised Forex Brokers
In Nigeria, traders increasingly diversify across multiple asset classes.
Instead of trading only currencies, traders now participate in:
Platforms integrating multiple markets, such as Bitget’s Universal Exchange (UEX), reflect this shift toward broader trading ecosystems.
Frequently Asked Questions
What is the best forex trading platform in Nigeria?
Many Nigerian traders use platforms such as Bitget, Exness, IC Markets, Pepperstone, and FXTM, depending on whether they want forex-only trading or access to broader markets like commodities and stocks.
Can Nigerians trade gold online?
Yes. Many platforms allow Nigerians to trade gold (XAU) and silver (XAG) through CFD or derivative markets.
Which platform allows forex and stock trading together?
Some newer trading platforms integrate forex, commodities, indices, and stock markets within one ecosystem, allowing traders to access multiple asset classes.
Is forex trading legal in Nigeria?
Forex trading itself is not illegal in Nigeria, but traders should ensure they use reputable platforms and understand the risks involved.
