From your food choice, we’ll know if you still have home training or drop when there’s a hot gist online.
You’re meeting your partner’s parents for the first time at a family lunch. Make it to the end of this quiz to prove you have home training.
Questions
This is a question
You’re told to show up at 2pm. When do you get there?
What are you wearing?
You’re served 2 pieces of meat. How many do you eat?
Someone spills their drink during lunch. What do you do?
They serve something you’re allergic to. What do you do?
You’re done with your food, but you want more. What do you do?
Everyone has finished eating. What do you do?
Wrong time
Showing up too early means you don’t have anything reasonable you’re doing with your life and showing up at the exact time means you’re a lazy goat that just came to eat their food.
Wrong choice of outfit
If you wear anything other than trad, how are they supposed to know that you’re a traditional person and that you’re a good fit for their child?
Eat only 1
Eating none means you’re wasteful and eating 2 means you’re a glutton.
Wrong move
Better ask for napkin or something to clean everywhere.
Eat it!
Just eat it and die. How can you be allergic to your in-laws food?
Pretend, dear
How can you ask for more or eat from another person’s food? Do you want to eat their whole house? Just act like you’re full please.
Help them clean
You came early to help them set up, so just finished what you started. Don’t let them think you have the spirit of not completing things.
You have home training
You have home training and your partner’s parents love you. Good job.
It may seem like our wahala might be a little too much when we say some of you don’t have home training, but it’s true.
According to this report by Sahara Reporters, someone’s father, Mr Andrew Nworah, went all the way to the newspapers to disown and denounce his son, Bethel Nworah.
FLASH: This Nigerian father took up a newspaper ad to denounce and disown his son pic.twitter.com/ne5ZGbzxj9
This is why people should stop losing your home-training o!
We’re just here to share this amebo for you. But as per, Zikoko detectives, what do you think Bethel did to offend his father? Share your thoughts in the comments section.
1. Men, can you please stop peeing anywhere you see?
Why are we seeing like a hundred penises a day? Why?
2. Also men, can you please stop stretching your sweaty hands on the danfo seat?
This is not your father’s car, though.
3. People, STOP STARING!
Do Nigerians know looking like lucozade is rude?
4. Akara women, stop using your hands to pick our food!
What is that nonsense?
5. Traders everywhere, please stop dragging us innocent passers by.
Eko and Yaba boys are so guilty of this.
6. What of all the people that will be coughing in our mouths in public?
Spreading the germs and all the viruses!
7. And all those buka people selling rice and small stew, mind yourself!
Okay, this has nothing to do with etiquette, but WHY are you ‘mizing’ stew ???
8. Special shout out to all those who quietly release gas in public places and unlook like:
The worst!
9. As for people that use public toilets and don’t flush, your case is on another level.
No home training!
10. And those ones that chook mouth when you and your friends are talking.
But who asked you?
Kai! We know we don’t have home training at Zikoko, but some of you really need to kneel down and raise up your hand.
1. This commenter that accurately described Meek Mill.
2. This Linda Ikeji commenter concerned about Ini Edo’s well being.
3. This guy that is not even here for Yung6ix.
4. Lisa giving Aunty Toke makeup “advice”.
5. This subtle shade at Aunty Linda.
6. The marriage police that won’t even allow you miss someone in peace.
7. Hian! That last comment sha.
8. I won’t even lie, this was good advice.
9. NO WORDS!
10. This oversabi exchange rate calculator… dollar ti won.
11. That second commenter that renamed DPrince.
12. Nigerians and backhanded compliments sha.
13. That third commenter that is doing NLC for waist trainer.
1. When they have to ask “have you seen me today?” before you greet them.
It’s not their concern that you really hadn’t seen them.
2. When they see someone that is left handed.
How dare you be born that way?
3. When you have more than one colour in your hair.
Ah! You want to go and do prostitution.
4. When you wear a dress that is exposing your shoulder blades and ankles.
Better go and wear that turtleneck.
5. When they see a girl with more than one piercing and a boy that has any at all.
You sef, why are you chooking holes in your body?
6. When they hear that you were talking to someone of the opposite sex.
You better be ready to marry them.
7. When your curfew is 9:00 and you get in by 9:01.
You should have slept there na, since you can’t keep to time.
8. When you lend them money and ask for it back.
All the school fees they paid for you, did they collect it back? Better shift.
9. When they are talking to you and you are keeping quiet.
So, you can’t talk abi?
10. When they are talking to you and you are talking too.
So, you can’t keep quiet abi?
11. When you don’t greet all the 15 adults in a room individually.
You cannot prostrate 15 times?
12. When you don’t add “ma” or “sir” to the end of every word.
“yes ma, yes ma, yes” “Is it me you are saying yes too???”
13. When a sex scene comes on and your eyes are still open.
You want to learn so you can go and practice abi?
14. When they make a mistake and you correct them.
It’s like you’re mad.
15. When they want to slap you and you dodge it.
Fight them na.
16. When you eat your meat before touching your rice.
