What’s one thing about your kind of relationship you love? In this article, 7 Nigerians share with us their favourite thing about being polyamorous.
One thing I love about being polyamorous is having enough time to be by yourself. When you’re down and not in the space to communicate with your partners, they have other people to keep involved. It’s not so much that they don’t recognise you’re not at your best, but enough that you don’t feel like you’re neglecting them.
The freedom. Just knowing that if I wanted to, I could have different relationships with different people is my favourite thing.
Honesty with the people I love. My wife and my other women all know I am polyamorous and this is allows for security in relationships. I can hang around a couple or more women and everyone is secure in their place. I find it mentally and intellectually fulfilling.
There’s a kind of openness that comes with being polyamorous. Your partners don’t feel like they have to hide any part of themselves because of fear that you’d leave them.
You don’t resent your partner for not being able to do certain tasks with you. If you’re with just one person, it’s easy to resent them because they don’t enjoy some of the activities you do. With multiple partners, one partner isn’t burdened with being present for every single situation.
I get to process jealousy in a healthy way. It means a lot to me that my partners and I have regular conversations about jealousy with ourselves. In a few of my former monogamous relationships, it felt like jealousy was not something that could be brought up because he possibility of being left for someone else was too high. With polyamory, knowing that nobody has to leave makes those conversations a lot easier.
I love how you get to experience the same thing through different people. When I’m with two people who have physical touch as their primary love language, I’m able to see how varying individuals express the same type of love language in different ways. It’s very beautiful.
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