• We’re All Doing These 7 Things the Moment They Invent Time Travel

    Now that they’ve invented AI, we’re begging the scientists to rest and focus on more pressing matters like time travel. If you’re wondering what we plan to do with it, here are a few things.

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    Go back and tie up Lord Lugard

    Because why will he decide to go down in history as the architect of everlasting stress? Can he see the mess he made? Does he think it’s funny?

    Or at least go back and stop Buhari

    If 1914 is too far, we should at least be able to go to 2015 and erase everyone’s memories of the name “Buhari”. Maybe the exchange rate won’t be looking like it’s ascending to heaven today.

    Buy dollars before it crashed

    We’re definitely going back in time to when $1 was ₦‎150. No complaints.

    Secure a second passport

    If those parts of history refuse to change because Nigeria’s destiny has too much strong head, we’ll go back in time and arrange japa for our parents. Let’s prevent life from leading us 1-0 by getting a second passport.

    Stop semo from being invented

    We have no choice but to find the person who first thought semo was a good idea and give them a dirty slap.

    Go back and buy bitcoin

    Some people have decided they have dream jobs. They can stay in 2023 and have all the jobs they want. As for us, we do not dream of labour. We’re going back to 2009 to buy Bitcoin for $1. WAGMI in the mighty name of God.

    Then come back to 2023 to cash it out with Bundle

    What’s the point of going back in time to buy Bitcoin for $1 if we can’t spend it? So, when we’re done, we’re taking the time machine right back to 2023 to sell it all now that it has turned into blood money.

    That’s where Bundle comes in. They have over 80 cryptocurrencies from Bitcoin and Ethereum to SHIBA. Even if a time machine never comes, you can trade these cryptocurrencies and get the bag for yourself in 2023. All you have to do is download the app and sign up to get started.

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Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.