28 Things Only Single Nigerian Ladies Can Understand

March 18, 2016

1. Your parents keep asking about your prospects.

Roll eyes

I can’t tell the future, sir.

2. Or worrying if you’d still be able to have kids.

they got screenshots and you still lying

Will my ovaries just dry up?

3. Or insisting you’re getting too old.

…even though you’re like thirty!

4. Your aunties trying to set you up with their friends’ doctor son.

eye r5oll

But I don’t know him now!

5. All your friends think they can solve your singleness.


Thanks, but no thanks.

6. Twitter says you’re “too opinionated”, so you won’t find a Nigerian man to marry you.

Your brain. Where is it?

7. “Don’t get a PhD degree, men don’t like over-smart women”.

6d987cfb2642be7fed4a25f39463745f_720 (1)

You don’t say!

8. Guys with nothing to offer approaching because they think you’ll be desperate enough to accept.

naomi campbell you're an idiot

God, See my life!

9. People asking why you broke up with your last boyfriend.


I was self sabotaging. Okay?

10. People asking what you feel if your younger sister gets married before you.


More power to her!>

11. Then they say “You’re so nice, I wonder why you’re still single”.


Err..because I am!

12. Your parents asking you to stop looking for love and just marry someone.


And you’re here thinking “Am I that sad?”=

13. You’re always the third, fifth and seventh wheel.


Come along, they said. It’ll be fun, they said.

14. And the designated photographer of your happy couple friends.


Stop. Smiling. I can’t else they’d say I’m bitter.

15. No one understands that you just want to be single right now.


I mean, it’s a choice…

16. Everyone keeps saying, “You’ll soon find someone”.


Yeah, sure.

17. Or that you have to love yourself before someone can love you.


Go on, please!

18. You’re secretly excited when your friends break up.


Oh I’m so sorry you guys broke up..LOL!

19. Or when their spouses don’t show up for events.


“Who needs them anyway? We’ll still have fun without them.”

20. Catching up with old friends always means awkwardly answering the “So, are you seeing anyone?” question.


No. But I still have me.

21. You’re a master at having crushes


But a relationship novice.

22. People tiptoe around you when relationships topics come up.


Jeez! I won’t break down in tears.

23. If there’s an event you want to go to, you have to decide if you want to go badly enough that it’s worth going alone because of all the questions above.


But it really isn’t. “I immediately regret this decision” – You say to yourself, after you go.


24. Especially weddings.



25. Or Valentine’s day.



26. You blush every time Beyonce’s “Single Ladies” comes on.

Too close to home.

27. Even you start to wonder if you’re going to be forever alone.



28. But then you realize that you’re loving the single life.


Because let’s face it, relationships aren’t that great.

CNHsN8zVAAAFuDV.jpg large


Join The Conversation

Bring a friend.

You'll like this


Now on Zikoko

April 19, 2021

There’s always that one thing you can beat your chest about even if all else fails. It is your unique selling point or distinguishing factor as an individual wherever you go, ak.a your flex. This quiz will reveal what yours is. Dive in.

April 19, 2021

We all have things that we do that make us feel just a little bit guilty. These six Nigerian women share with us what their guilty pleasures are. Bola, 25 Pringles. I love pringles so much. In school, I used to set money aside from my allowance to buy Pringles. It was even a part […]

April 19, 2021

People (and by people I mean strangers on the internet) are often quick to say “Nigerian men and women were made for each other. I decided to confirm if this match was made in heaven or Nigerian men were better suited to others. I asked six Nigerian men about their romantic experiences with non-Nigerians. Here’s […]

April 19, 2021

Mummy, daddy, uncle and aunty, we shall not be beating around the bush. Here is a list of things you do that we do not appreciate and we think you need to stop doing them.  T for Thanks. 1. Sending Whatsapp broadcasts (a.k.a forwarded many times) Please, make it stop. The broadcasts are always so […]

April 19, 2021

Bras are one of the most unnecessary things on earth. They dig into your skin, leave marks on your shoulder, and are just downright uncomfortable especially if you have bigger breasts. Now, because we all hate bras, here are some alternatives. 1) Nylon We are all about recycling and taking better care of the environment, […]

Recommended Quizzes

November 14, 2019

The fourth season of Big Brother Naija came to an end over a month ago, but the conversation surrounding the housemates is far from over. So, in a bid to keep the fire burning, we decided to create a quiz that tells you which famous member of the ‘Pepper Dem’ gang is your soulmate. Take […]

January 2, 2020

Do you have even a single romantic bone in your body? Well, if you’re not sure about just how sweet and thoughtful you can be to someone you love, that’s what this quiz is here to answer. 11 Quizzes For Nigerians Who Are Ready To Marry  Are you ready to marry? Take these quizzes.

April 3, 2020

While the rest of the world loves to treat our continent like a country, there are actually 54 African countries. So, in a bid to test your knowledge (and educate you), we’ve created a quiz to see how many of their capitals you can correctly name. Go ahead:

More from Oldies

February 12, 2020

Forget Tunji and Daniella, if you’re wondering who your best friend is, it’s most definitely the phone you’re either reading this from or the phone that’s somewhere within your vision; we know this because you’re definitely a phone addict that gets a little impatient when you’re too far away from your phone. Okay, let’s not […]

February 8, 2020

Yes, Valentine’s Day is almost here. Love notes, chocolates, hampers, and everything that comes with it. But while everyone is being hit by cupid’s arrow, there are some people who don’t even feel the hype. If you’re one of them, then grab a seat at this table. 1. You, when you hear that Valentine is […]

February 8, 2020

In case you have not realised it, Nigerians have a PhD in lying. Multiple PhDs, even. And there are some people who are professors in the art of lying, but we will keep that conversation for another day. Anyway, here is a list of common lies Nigerians tell. Don’t lie, we know you must told […]

February 8, 2020

Anyone who grew up in a Nigerian household understands that the Saturday routine does not change. It is the same yesterday, today and forever. If you are a true Nigerian, then you’ll understand these pictures and their connection to Saturday mornings. 1. Morning devotion by 6:00 AM. In which your parents can slap you for […]

February 8, 2020

Growing up, Saturdays used to be fun thanks to Cadbury Nigeria and Silverbird television. However, these days, as an adult, Saturdays are filled with unfinished work from the week before. If you are lucky, maybe a nice outing or mild to moderate fornication. Still, all these don’t fill the void the way cartoons used to […]


Trending Videos

Zikoko Originals

December 14, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
November 2, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
October 26, 2020
A collection of videos documenting some of the events of the EndSARS protests.
June 22, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
June 22, 2020
Hacked is an interesting new series by Zikoko made up of fictional but hilarious chat conversations.
June 4, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
June 2, 2020
Quickie is a video series where everyone featured gets only one minute to rant, review or do absolutely anything.
May 14, 2020
Isolation Diary is a Zikoko series that showcases what isolation is like for one young Nigerian working from home due to the Coronavirus pandemic.
March 12, 2020
Life is already hard. Deciding where to eat and get the best lifestyle experiences, isn't something you should stress about. Let VRSUS do that for you.

Z! Stacks

Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in:

Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.