9 Things You’ll Relate To If You Grew Up Completely Scared Of Your Parents

July 28, 2020

I hope you have their permission to read this post?

1) If they enter a room, you instinctively leave for them.

I don’t want wahala oh.

2) Car rides were usually silent.

Hold your lips and rest your back. If I hear pim.

3) While doing Mtn midnight call and you hear their door open.

Save me sweet baby Jesus.

4) Your face when a sex scene comes up on TV

These people want to finish me in this house.

5) When someone threatens to report you to them:

Abeg.

6) Once you hear car horn.

7) Or the sound of keys.

8) Or, or, just the sound of their voice.

9) You trying to relax when they enter your room to bond.

Why are you asking me about food? Why are you acting like we’re related?

You'll like this

Hassan Yahaya

Join The Conversation

Bring a friend.

Watch

Now on Zikoko

August 3, 2020

Without thinking too much, you can already picture some of the evergreen Nigerian albums you’ll come across in this article. Well, let’s get to it! 1. Adio, 33- YBNL “This joint dropped at the point in my life where I was hustling and the energy from the album just supplied me with constant ginger to […]

August 3, 2020

Housing is a problem for a lot of Nigerians. It is not uncommon to find several people squatting together in a small apartment. I spoke to a 25 year old woman who has been evicted thrice because of her vagina. How did everything start? My first memory of being evicted happened in my 300 level […]

August 3, 2020

Welcome to my TED talk. Today, I’m going to be talking about money etiquette young people should know. Because money is at the centre of our activities as human beings. I hope you find this useful: 1) If you borrow money from someone, ensure you pay back. If for some reason you can’t pay back, […]

Recommended Quizzes

November 19, 2019

Regardless of what society has tried to tell us, enjoying sex is not something to be ashamed of. So, in a bid to celebrate our generation’s sexual agency, we’ve created a quiz that will accurately (again, keep your complaints to yourself) infer how many people you’ve spelt with. Try it out: Only People With Nigerian […]

how much of an ajebutter
February 12, 2020

Are you an ajebutter or not? Well, if you’ve gone through life blissfully unaware of its harshness, then you probably are. Now, we want to know just how high you rank on that ajebutter scale, using your food preferences as a (very accurate) measure. Take to find out:

What are you like in a relationship?
February 7, 2020

Your taste in music can say a lot about you, and this time, it’s going to reveal what you are like in a relationship. So, pick a few of your favourite Nigerian love songs, and we’ll let you know if you’re typically a distant, passionate or unbothered partner. Here you go:

October 10, 2019

2019 is certainly Burna Boy’s year, but, if we are being honest, so was 2018. Since his transcendent mixtape, Outside, the afro-fusion star has refused to get his foot of our necks — dropping a string of fantastic singles and then capping it all off with his career-best album, African Giant.  So, in a bid […]

December 5, 2019

We already tried to guess how much you have in your account and your current net worth, and we think we did a pretty great job (keep any complaints to yourself). Now, we’re going to try and guess your monthly salary based on your relationship with money. Oya, take the quiz:

More from Inside Life

July 29, 2020

A haunted house is never fun when you live in one. The idea of ghosts sharing your toothbrush and watching you shower and have sex is something you might want to consider. Here is a list of ways to check if your house is haunted. 1. Doors open and close randomly If doors and windows […]

July 29, 2020

COVID-19. It’s pretty much all we hear these days. Never before has any singular event altered the course of human history. Every other day, we hear about new ramifications of this deadly disease: damaged organs, lung scarring, stroke, impact on the brain and mental health. Like these aren’t enough, reports and studies are showing ways […]

Watch

Trending Videos

Zikoko Originals

June 22, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
June 22, 2020
Hacked is an interesting new series by Zikoko made up of fictional but hilarious chat conversations.
June 4, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
June 2, 2020
Quickie is a video series where everyone featured gets only one minute to rant, review or do absolutely anything.
May 14, 2020
Isolation Diary is a Zikoko series that showcases what isolation is like for one young Nigerian working from home due to the Coronavirus pandemic.
March 12, 2020
Life is already hard. Deciding where to eat and get the best lifestyle experiences, isn't something you should stress about. Let VRSUS do that for you.
February 6, 2020
Who doesn't want to find love? In our bid to help, we paired up a bunch of single Nigerians, sending them on an all-expense paid date, and interviewing them before and after they met.
January 27, 2020
Nigerians Talk is what happened when a motley crew of young Nigerians were put in front of a camera and asked a bunch of apparently random questions about life, love, money and more.
September 24, 2019
A group of Zikoko staff go on a road trip to every mainland country in ECOWAS West Africa

Z! Stacks

Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in:

Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.
X