14 Dumb But Extremely Hilarious Things We Believed As Children


February 19, 2020

I promise you that this is not nostalgia, but why did I have to grow up? Childhood was fun because things were simpler and I didn’t overthink. Also, it was easier to take anything at face value.

As an adult, not so much. Overthinking left and right.

Here is a list of absolutely silly yet funny things we all believed as kids growing up:

1) Ojuju Calabar.

If you don’t go to bed at a particular time, a mysterious monster would come and carry you. It’s so funny that as an adult you wish it exists so you don’t have to go to work the next day. Come out, you coward!

2) Touch to impregnate.

If you sit next to a girl or hold her hands, she will get pregnant and other tales.

3) Adulthood is fun.

Seeing adults sleep anytime they wanted to and also being able to buy anything convinced us that growing up was utopia. LOL!

If only I could turn back the hands of time.

4) Parents have all the answers.

It’s only funny when you think about it that you realize that as a child, the go-to answer for any problem was “I’ll tell my mummy for you.”

So, that she will do what exactly?

5) Satan is on the floor.

Food falls on the floor and you assume Satan has eaten out of the food. Cute.

6) Children come from heaven.

God gives kids. Periodt.

7) Actors die in real life.

Seeing an actor off the screen and running away because you saw them die in a Nollywood movie on T.v. Screaming ghost, ghost everywhere.

8) Age of players displayed on their jerseys.

Maybe I am alone in this one but I thought players had their age shown on their jerseys. I didn’t question why a full-grown person had number 1 on their back.

9) If you lie once, hell-fire straight.

I was raised that one lie = hellfire. Thank goodness God is merciful because…

10) People live inside Television.

Saying goodnight to people inside the Telly because I thought they slept inside.

11) We could all be Presidents.

“I want to be President of Nigeria” was the most common answer to questions about the future. Lewl.

12) Whistle at night and snakes will come.

How??? Is it like catcalling the snake?

13) Swallow seed and it’ll grow in your stomach.

Man, how??

14) When the sun is out and it’s raining, a lion is giving birth.

Damn.

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