If you have Nigerian parents then you’ll relate to one or more of the points on this list:
1) “It’s for your own good”
They say this after beating you like you killed Jesus. Mummy and daddy, the constant beatings is why “half” of Nigerians have a BDSM fetish. They’re trying to recreate childhood “nostalgia.”
2) “You made me very angry”
Nothing like accountability in the dictionary of older Nigerians.
3) “You’ll thank me in the future”
I hate lies.
4) “My parents did the same”
Is PTSD also part of inheritance?
5) “You’ll become an armed robber if I don’t train you”
Everybody involved in this lie, hands up.
6) “Spare the road & spoil the child”
Perish that idea.
7) “As long as you’re under my roof”
The ultimate my word is final card that justifies any behavior from Nigerian parents.
8) “After all the money I paid”
How much is my life worth? Is that why I deserve this beating?
9) “I’ll not let you embarrass me outside”
Is it because of small embarrassment that you’re trying to kill me?
10) “The dollar price is frustrating me”
Emefiele come outside and fight.
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