8 Nigerian Women Tell Us What Their Definition Of Cheating In A Relationship Is

February 3, 2021

Different women have different definitions of cheating. For some, it is more emotional than physical. These eight Nigerian women define cheating for us.

Zainab, 19

I don’t think I have a definition of cheating. Physical activities are physical, and I cannot stop you from hanging out with someone even if they like you or you like them. If you have sex with someone else that’s fine because I will too. It’s the lying I have a problem with. Just don’t lie about it. Don’t sneak around. Do it with your chest and if I can’t handle it anymore, I’d bounce.

Linda, 23

I am very particular about bonds and intimacy in terms of communication. So for me, cheating is having romantic feelings and acting on them with someone else while having a partner. Hanging out in date like settings and giving them energy that should only be exclusive to a partner.

Amaka, 19

Existing in other women’s spaces. I consider confiding in other women cheating. If you go to them for emotional support and personal stuff etc.

Cynthia, 33

I am not one of those people that say “sex is sex”. Sex is not just sex. Sexual activities are not just sexual activities and doing them with someone that is not your partner means you cheated.

Hi there! While you are here do you want to take a minute to sign up for HER’S weekly newsletter? There’ll be inside gist from this series and other fun stuff. It’ll only take 15 seconds. Yes I timed it.

Anu, 20

When I hear some people define cheating, they make it sound like you cannot breathe close to someone without them. Cheating to me is relationship spice, and a fun game to play. When I start getting bored with one partner, I cheat. Then when you “catch” me, I just beg and I am usually forgiven. My friends tell me it’s messed up and wicked, but aren’t we all a bit messed up and wicked?

Halima, 27

I guess I am very traditional. If you so much as look at another woman for longer than five seconds, you have cheated. What happened to lowering your gaze?

Lola, 19

For me cheating is engaging people in a way that you can’t openly do in front of your partner. It is also anything that you do with someone else that you have to hide from your partner. It could be flirting, touching them in a way or even talking about sexual things. If you have to hide it or would never let your partner see then you are cheating in some way.

Jane, 31

Cheating to me is when you do things with other people that you know your partner will not be comfortable with. If you know your partner will feel a kind of way they find out, you cheated.

For more stories about women and all the million and one things they are up to, click here

If you want to know what men think cheating is, please click here


Zikoko Donation Banner

Help Zikoko keep making the content you love

More than ever, people are turning to Zikoko for stories that matter and content they love. But still, we, like many media organisations, are feeling the financial heat of these times. If you find us valuable, please make a contribution to help keep Zikoko zikoko-ing.

Thank you for your support.

We are also cool with Crypto.

Donation Close
Zikoko Logo

Complete Your Commitment

Donation confirm

Your Contribution is confirmed! Amount

Join The Conversation

Bring a friend.

You'll like this

June 3, 2022

Anita* and Cynthia* are cousins with a four-year age difference. They spent a lot of their free time together as children, but one incident changed the trajectory of their relationship. Now, it’s been over a decade since they spoke. Here’s *Anita’s story: 

woman holding her stomach in pain
August 14, 2021

Almost every woman I know dislikes periods. Who the hell thought it was a genius idea to install this feature? Here’s a list of things women hate about periods.  1. Bleeding  The fact that we are even bleeding at all is already a downer. There is no way up from that. Just spotting for one […]

Watch

Now on Zikoko

Recommended Quizzes

April 14, 2020

Every friend group consists of very different and specific characters — from the parent to the fun one — and it can be a little tough figuring out where you fall. So, we’ve created a quiz that lets you know exactly what kind of friend you are. Take to find out:

What are you like in a relationship?
February 7, 2020

Your taste in music can say a lot about you, and this time, it’s going to reveal what you are like in a relationship. So, pick a few of your favourite Nigerian love songs, and we’ll let you know if you’re typically a distant, passionate or unbothered partner. Here you go:

October 10, 2019

2019 is certainly Burna Boy’s year, but, if we are being honest, so was 2018. Since his transcendent mixtape, Outside, the afro-fusion star has refused to get his foot of our necks — dropping a string of fantastic singles and then capping it all off with his career-best album, African Giant.  So, in a bid […]

October 30, 2019

2010 was a game-changing one for Nollywood, with our movies making serious cash and getting international acclaim. So, which of these hits released between 2010 and 2019 — from the pace-setting The Wedding Party to the divisive Trip To Jamaica — best suits your personality? Well, that’s what this quiz is here to answer:

More from Her

What She Said: I Hate the Word “Disabled”
December 7, 2022

This week’s #ZikokoWhatSheSaid subject is a 49-year-old Nigerian woman who lost a leg after an okada accident. She talks about waking up to find a stump where her leg used to be, what it’s like to lose a limb and what she thinks about how people treat amputees.

Watch

Trending Videos

Zikoko Originals

September 13, 2022
Vs The World is a Zikoko original video series that follows best friends Astor and Hassan as they take on the world.
August 23, 2022
Zikoko Ships is a Zikoko Original series where we invite two people who share a relationship to play the Zikoko card games
December 14, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
November 2, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
October 26, 2020
A collection of videos documenting some of the events of the EndSARS protests.
June 22, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
June 22, 2020
Hacked is an interesting new series by Zikoko made up of fictional but hilarious chat conversations.
June 4, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
June 2, 2020
Quickie is a video series where everyone featured gets only one minute to rant, review or do absolutely anything.
May 14, 2020
Isolation Diary is a Zikoko series that showcases what isolation is like for one young Nigerian working from home due to the Coronavirus pandemic.

Z! Stacks

Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in:

Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.
X