With the dollar rising faster than dough, feminists have sprung to action to save the entire country from extinction. We spoke to them and here’s a list of things they plan to do:
Stealing our partner’s hoodies
Because we need to save money. What’s better than buying your own hoodie with money you don’t have? Stealing one.
Hiding money in our PiggyVest accounts
By hiding our money and spending other people’s money, we’re trying to reduce the amount of money in circulation and thus bring down the dollar exchange rate.
Refusing to cook or do the dishes alone
By making everyone participate in physical labor, we’re actively contributing to increasing productivity, which will yield more revenue, and directly improve the exchange rate.
Practicing how to eat corn
I believe we were all there when a presidential candidate said that we will survive on corn. We need to all join hands to eat corn better so the dollar rate can come down.
Practicing safe sex
Safe sex reduces the level of sexually transmitted infections on the streets, which reduces the amount of money spent on treatment. Less money spent = lower dollar rate. Quick maths.
Spending time on Twitter
All the time we spend on Twitter is actually us putting in our hours to reducing the dollar rate. We do this by quoting tweets with shady responses or telling men to moisturise. Quite effective, if you ask me.
This is pretty simple economics. As women empowerment goes up, the dollar rate comes down. Everybody is happy. This is a call to action.
Now that you know what Nigerian feminists are currently up to, here’s an article about how to be a feminist Nigerian men love.
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