Every family has at least one lore that has been passed down for generations, growing more fascinating with each retelling. We asked ten Nigerians to open up about some of the deepest secrets in their family, and they had stories for days. 

“My dad’s previous families disappeared” — Jemimah* 26 

My mum believes my father was a cultist who killed off his previous family. When they got married, she had no idea she was his fourth wife. By the time she found out, the three women before her were all dead under mysterious circumstances.

A room she wasn’t allowed to enter also fuelled her suspicions. Three years later, she fled the marriage along with my brother and me.

My father tried to find us, but he died from a gunshot incident before he could get to us. To this day, my mum believes his death was cult-related. 

“My grandmother loved another woman” — Chinelo*, 39

One of the most fascinating stories in my family starts with my grandmother. Her mother couldn’t have children, so she followed an old custom that allowed a woman to marry another woman who would bear children on her behalf.

The woman eventually had five children, including my grandmother. Under the arrangement, she was regarded as my great-grandmother’s wife.  Years later, the man involved died, but the two women stayed together and raised the family.

My grandmother never said it outright, but it was widely believed their relationship went beyond a transactional agreement. The way she described them, they genuinely loved each other and lived as partners for the rest of their lives. 

“My aunt got away with murder” — Zainab*, 29

My distant aunt got away with murder in the 90s. She lost her parents at a young age and moved in with an aunt, where she helped care for the home and children. My family claims her aunt’s husband sexually and physically abused her. Some relatives also suspected he abused his daughters.

She endured it for years until she snapped. One day, she picked up an iron pestle and struck him on the back of the head. The injury killed him.

The shocking part was how his wife covered for her. Other relatives also kept quiet, and the whole thing stayed within the family. She continued living with her aunt after his death and even adopted the man’s surname.  

“My grandfather was swapped at birth” — Johnson*, 26

When my grandfather was 63, his mother called him to her bedside and confessed that he’d been swapped as a baby.

According to her, she’d already given birth to five girls, but the absence of a son could spell serious consequences. So she hatched a plan with a midwife. In those days, midwives secretly swapped babies between families.

After she welcomed another girl, the midwife secretly exchanged the baby for a boy from a family that already had sons. My grandfather spent over six decades believing he was her biological child. By the time she told him the truth, there was no way to verify it or find his supposed birth family. 

“My relatives kidnapped my father” — Folarin*, 31

My father sold a family property and used the money to expand his car parts business.  Some relatives never forgave him, and the issue stayed unresolved for years. Then, in 2013, my father was kidnapped. His captors demanded ₦10 million for his release. While security agencies searched for him, we scrambled to raise the sum.

After he was rescued, one of the men involved was arrested and claimed my aunt and uncle had organised the kidnapping. They denied everything and still deny it today. 

“No firstborn son in my family has lived past his 20s” — Loveth*, 25

There’s a belief in my family that firstborn sons don’t live long. From the stories I heard, my great-great-grandmother was a powerful witch who led a secret cult. Eventually, the community cursed and banished her.

Since then, no firstborn son in my family has lived past his 20s. For years, I dismissed the story as superstition. But in 2023, my cousin died unexpectedly at 27. Both of my uncles died young too, which only strengthened the belief.

I’m the firstborn in my family, but I’m a woman, so technically the curse doesn’t apply to me. Even so, it’s hard not to think about it. 

“My family stole me from my dad” — Bello*, 42

I lost my mum at a young age and was raised by my father.  Everyone in the family claimed he was irresponsible, but he still wouldn’t let them take me off his hands.  When I was five, I visited my mum’s relatives. My father claims that when he came to pick me up, they told him I’d run away. He searched for me, but his efforts were futile. He had no idea that I’d been shipped to an aunt in Kano.

I grew up believing that aunt was my mother until I turned 20.  When I finally discovered him and contacted him, he told me what he believed had happened. But my relatives still deny everything.

My father still isn’t a responsible person. I would’ve had a much harder life if he had raised me.

“My grandmother secretly had two families” — Destiny* 19

My grandmother had been married abroad with two children from her first husband. But after she was deported back to Nigeria, the marriage collapsed, and her husband cut her off.

She hid that chapter of her life and eventually remarried in Nigeria, where she had three more children with my grandfather. For almost a decade, my grandfather didn’t know the truth.

Everything unravelled when she tried reconnecting with her children overseas. The revelation shook the family, but my grandfather stayed. When I heard the story, all I could think about was how unfair it is that I ended up on the Nigerian side of the family.

“My older brother is my biological cousin” — Mary*, 30

Before I was born, my uncle impregnated a woman and abandoned her. My dad stepped in and raised him as his own son.

For 19 years, no one knew the truth. Then one day, my brother and I overheard my parents discussing how my uncle wanted his son back. 

Even after they realised we knew the truth, my parents barely spoke about it. I once referred to him as my cousin in front of my mum, and she looked so hurt that I never brought it up again. Over the years, I’ve realised it doesn’t change anything. He’s still my brother.

“We don’t share my family’s original name” — Peace*, 23

My family’s original surname was linked to the worship of a river goddess. But after converting to Christianity, my grandfather wanted nothing to do with it. Despite coming from a royal family, he abandoned the name and gave his kids a completely different surname.

His relatives saw it as a betrayal. They felt he had rejected his ancestors and heritage. The decision caused years of conflict and created a rift that still exists today. We’re the only branch of the family that doesn’t share the original surname.

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