Parenting in Nigeria is hard enough with two parents doing their best. When you’re doing it alone, it’s a harder job with higher stakes. For many Nigerian women, being raised by a single mother was both a lesson in resilience and a peek into the realities of womanhood.
These women share what it was like growing up with a single mum and the lessons they learned from that experience.
“I learned to be independent” — Efe*, 25
Efe shares how her mum’s resistance to external pressure taught her how to adapt to different situations and be independent.
“My mum and my dad split up before I was born. Her family pressured her to remarry and settle with me and my older siblings, but she never did. I saw her fight against stigma, erasure and disrespect from family members and random strangers.
This isn’t to say it was easy. At 12, I learned to cook and clean while keeping up with schoolwork because my mum worked at a bank and often came home late. I feel like I grew up a bit faster than most of my friends, but now I see that independence as one of my biggest strengths. There’s no situation I can’t adapt to and thrive in, and that’s all thanks to my mum.”
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“My mother showed me that hard work will take you anywhere” — Morewa*, 54
Morewa’s dad died when she was young, leaving her mum to care for six children. She shares the major lesson she learned from watching her mum tackle their new reality.
“My father died when I was seven, and his death changed everything. My mum had to raise me and my five siblings alone, and we went from being very comfortable to rationing food every day. It was tough for a while, but my mum did her best; feeding and sending six kids to school was no small feat. She started a small farm and combined it with a teaching job at a school near the house.
She worked tirelessly to make sure we had most of our needs met. She passed away when I was only 17, but her legacy of hard work and tenacity lives with me to this day. Those lessons helped me keep my head above water when my family hit a rough patch financially in 2011. I went from being a stay-at-home mum to taking on two jobs as a mobile hairdresser and sachet water supplier. It was hard, but it saved my family until my husband got back on his feet in 2016. ”
“She taught me to be resilient” — Ladi*, 29
Ladi’s mum took a risk by leaving her dad and choosing to raise her alone. She shares how her mum’s choices showed her the benefits of being resilient.
“My mum was in a physically abusive relationship with my dad for the first few years of my life. They weren’t married, but they lived together. I remember we left when I was seven. That day, my father had beaten my mum and then turned his anger on me. My mum flared up after that. She said he could do anything he wanted to her, but no one was going to maltreat her child. She packed a few clothes for us, and we left his house that night.
Things were hard for a long time after that. We squatted at her friends’ homes or with family members while she worked multiple jobs to get me through school. She eventually started a hair salon when I was 15, and that business kept our home together till I started working. Seeing her run side hustles from morning till night taught me never to be afraid of hard work, because she wasn’t. Watching her also taught me resilience and the fact that the tool you need to leave a bad situation is courage.”
“She taught me to never judge another person till I’ve walked in their shoes” — Amarachi*, 43
Amarachi watched her mum face nasty rumours and stigma because of her single-parent status. Regardless, her mum taught her to fight against prejudice and show more kindness.
“I was born outside wedlock. People — especially church members — treated my mum like trouble because she was a single parent. They constantly spread rumours about her and steered their kids away from me, but she didn’t fold under the pressure. She remained open, kind and courteous. While I was growing up, she constantly told me that if I didn’t know how another person’s shoes were pinching them, I shouldn’t judge them.
It wasn’t an easy lesson to learn because I used to be judgmental. As a teenager, I even resented her for being a single mum.. I feel bad looking back at those times because she really tried. As I’ve gotten older, I see what she meant. Life can be very volatile and crazy; you never know who you’re helping by being kind instead of writing them off because of their status or circumstances.”
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“My mum taught me to be excellent” — Daniella*, 30
Daniella shares how her mum’s lessons about giving your best in everything have shaped her life today.
“My father left when I was six. I don’t remember much about him from when we lived together. My memory of family has always been my mum, my two siblings and I.
Since I was young, one thing I remember my mum teaching us was the importance of being excellent. She rewarded us with gifts and extra cash if we did our chores really well and excelled in school. She always made a point to reward good efforts.
We had a lot of friction when I was a teen because I thought she was too strict and obsessed with results. But her insistence on excellence still helps me today. Thanks to her, I know that the best way to stand out positively is by being great at what you do, and I appreciate her for planting those seeds in me.”
The topic of how young Nigerians navigate romantic relationships with their earnings is a minefield of hot takes. In Love Currency, we get into what relationships across income brackets look like in different cities.
How long have you been with your partner?
We met in 2019 but started dating in 2022. We’ve been together for two years.
What changed between 2019 and 2022?
A lot. Luke had actually shown interest in a romantic relationship since 2019. We met when a bus conductor who owed us change “joined” us and gave us ₦500 to split. Luke was supposed to get ₦300; mine was ₦200.
I joked about him leaving his change for me, and he said he would if I gave him my number. I did, and he started calling regularly, talking about how he fell in love at first sight. But my heart was still with my on-and-off boyfriend at the time, and I was trying to hold on to see if the guy would one day be ready for a committed relationship.
That ended with me getting pregnant and the guy finally running away.
Yikes. Sorry about that
Honestly, I don’t blame anybody. I knew the guy was a goat, but I let emotions get the better of me. The minute I realised I was pregnant, I began mentally preparing myself to be a single mum. I wanted the baby — which didn’t make sense because I was a fresh NYSC graduate with no job. But abortion didn’t come to my mind.
Of course, Luke didn’t know and was calling me up and down. I just stopped picking up his calls and focused on how I’d provide for my child. Thankfully, I lived — I still do — with my supportive parents. They encouraged me to learn fashion design, which I did between 2019 and 2020.
After the lockdown, I converted the front of my parents’ house into a shop and started my business. Clients came in slowly, but I consider myself very creative, and people began to see that too. By 2021, I had a few steady clients. My parents helped look after my child whenever I was busy, and I didn’t feel overwhelmed.
It was around this time that Luke called again. I was surprised to see his call because he’d gotten the message and stopped calling some months back. I picked that day, and he was like, I just came to his mind, and he thought to reach out. That’s how we started talking again. I told him why I stopped picking his calls then, and surprisingly, he didn’t run away. He even wanted to see my child.
Aww. Did that contribute to you finally saying “yes” to a relationship?
It definitely changed how I saw Luke; it increased my respect for him. But he didn’t even talk about a relationship right away. We reconnected and were friends for a few months before love entered the subject.
I didn’t delay my “yes” this time around because I felt he was making an informed decision; he knew about my past and knew my child would always be part of my future. I assumed that, for him to show interest, especially with all he knew about me, he was ready to be a father. It seemed like the cherry on top. This was someone I’d grown to love, and he wanted to be with (all of) me too. I felt like I’d hit the jackpot.
That sounds like the relationship hasn’t been everything you expected
To be fair, Luke has been good to me. Last year, he paid ₦80k for me to do a short fashion design course to add to my knowledge. He’s also friendly with my child and has introduced me to his mother.
The only slight negative is that he doesn’t believe he should be financially responsible for my child, which has led to many arguments.
What kind of arguments?
We fight over me expecting him to be involved with my child’s needs. It’s not that I expect him to take on the entire responsibility. I just expect that he buys a few things for the child once in a while or even contribute something small to the school fees. But he has made it clear that he has no business spending money on my child.
When we first started dating, he visited me at home and brought fruits for my parents. You know children na. My child started jumping, asking, “Uncle, what did you buy for me?” Luke said, “Don’t worry, Grandpa will buy something for you.” When I asked him why he didn’t buy sweets or biscuits, knowing a child was at home, he got offended. He made it seem like we’d just started dating, and I was dictating to him what to do with money.
I accepted that I shouldn’t have asked like that and apologised. But over time, I’ve realised he deliberately doesn’t want to be financially involved. I was broke when my child needed to start school last year and asked him to help me with ₦50k to complete the fees. He was like, “That’s how it starts. Very soon, you’ll expect me to pay school fees.”
I was so angry that I lashed out, and we didn’t talk for two days. Eventually, he apologised but still insisted it was not his place to provide for my child. I asked if that would still be the case if we got married, and he said yes.
Really?
Yes. Though, I didn’t take him seriously. I thought he was just trying to protect himself. We hadn’t really talked about marriage before then, and I guessed it was just him avoiding having to spend on one girlfriend’s child when we might end up breaking up.
But, for a few months now, we’ve started talking about marriage seriously. Luke says he hopes for an early 2025 wedding, and while I’m excited about that, I’m also worried that his stance hasn’t changed. I asked him again if he was serious about me paying for everything related to my child, and he confirmed it because “the child’s real father can come any day.”
That’s a major problem for me. If I marry him and have his own children, he’ll probably treat them better than mine. Or if I can only afford a public school for this child, would my children attend different schools? I’m just confused.
Hmm. What’s Luke’s financial situation?
He’s a lawyer, and I think he earns ₦300k. I’m not sure because it’s been a while since he told me, and I try not to ask, especially because I talk about this issue with my child’s finances. I don’t want it to be like I’m only interested in his money.
What other money conversations do you both have besides your child’s finances?
Luke is quite intentional about financial discipline. He’s always talking about the need to have emergency savings. Because of him, I joined a ₦20k monthly ajo contribution in 2023. I used my share to buy an electric sewing machine. I’m due to collect again next month, and I’ll probably just save it in my savings app till I figure out what to do with it.
I also help Luke make some financial decisions. He talks to me about his needs, and we discuss when to make certain expenses. For instance, he wanted to rent an apartment some months ago because he was tired of sharing his with a roommate. But I encouraged him to wait until the wedding was close so he could get a bigger apartment. And he agreed.
How do you both budget for relationship expenses?
I’m not sure we actually budget. We go on dates at least once a month. Other times, we just stay indoors, and I cook. Luke handles the expenses when we go on dates; I buy the foodstuff to cook when we stay indoors.
We also gift each other on birthdays. For my last birthday, he bought me an Infinix phone, and I bought him a ₦25k pair of shoes.
Have you considered how you’ll handle wedding expenses?
I’m still having second thoughts about whether a wedding will happen. Luke’s financial responsibility for my child is a big issue for me. I’ll still bring it up again with him. If he still refuses, I’ll have to involve our parents and see how it goes from there.
But if the wedding happens, Luke should handle most of the expenses. I’ll probably pay for my outfits and makeup. That’s how we plan to run our home, too. We’ve talked about it, and Luke will handle the major home expenses while I support him.
I hope it works out. What’s your ideal financial future as a couple?
I’d like us to own real estate investments one day. Having a house or land property feels like the pinnacle of financial freedom to me, so I want that for us in the future.
Interested in talking about how money moves in your relationship? If yes, click here.
*Names have been changed for the sake of anonymity.
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Every week, Zikoko seeks to understand how people move the Naira in and out of their lives. Some stories will be struggle-ish, others will be bougie. All the time, it’ll be revealing.
What’s your earliest memory of money?
It’s the time I “took” ₦150 from my mum’s purse in Primary 2. I knew it was bad, but I did it. If she found out, she never confronted me.
Why ₦150?
My school had this thing called a check test. It was a type of midterm exam, and each child was to pay ₦150. When I told my mum, she said she didn’t have money. So, I had to collect it myself.
Was “I don’t have money” a regular phrase you heard growing up?
Not at first. My dad used to travel internationally to buy materials for his plumbing business, but he stopped and started doing local trips around the country instead. I never found out why.
I was small, but I noticed the changes. I remember starting primary school in a private school and suddenly withdrawing to attend a government school.
My dad gradually stopped bringing gifts from his trips, too. Then I started hearing, “I don’t have money.” Sometimes, he’d leave the house and not return for a long time.
My mum also moved from being a housewife to selling fruits at a major market in Onitsha, where we lived. I was used to seeing her at home whenever I came home from school, but she, too, started returning late. This was around 2006/2007.
I’d just started adjusting to our new reality when my mum passed away in 2012. My dad also started having issues paying rent, so he sent me and my siblings to live with my grandmother in the village.
I’m so sorry about your mum
Thanks. I was in JSS 2 and continued my secondary school education in the village. When I finished in 2017, there was no money to further my education, so I had to start working.
Sales girl jobs were the easiest options for secondary school certificate holders where I lived, and I found one at a provision store. My salary was ₦6k/month, which I used to fend for myself and provide for my sisters. I’m the second-born, but my elder sibling stayed back with an uncle in the city, so I became the oldest to the rest of my siblings.
I worked at the provision store for a year. Then, I decided to return to the city.
Why?
I was tired of living in the village and wanted to try going to university. My dad thought I was joking when I told him until I appeared in his one-room face-me-I-face-you apartment. I even left my sisters behind.
I told my dad I wanted to resume school, and his response was, “Hmm.” That clearly meant, “With which money?” I had to resort to looking for jobs if I hoped to make my school dream come true.
Did you find a job?
Yes. I found one as a marketer at a microfinance bank in 2019. Basically, we did esusu contribution (thrift collection), and my job was to enter the market and convince people to contribute with us. My salary was ₦15k/month, more than double what I made back in the village.
However, I could only save about ₦1k-₦2k monthly because my dad wasn’t doing great financially. He worked as “oso afia” — a middleman. You know those men you see standing around in the market and asking passersby what they want to buy? Then you tell them, and they take you to the person selling it. That’s what my dad did.
He made money from small commissions. His income wasn’t enough for anything, so I had to contribute to the home expenses.
I also sent about ₦5k monthly to my sisters back in the village. The rest of my salary went into my toiletries and transportation to work. I worked there for a year before I left in 2020.
Why did you leave?
The pressure was a lot. The bank expected me to bring people who could drop ₦1m in fixed deposits. But my customers were market people who used their money to trade, and I always missed my targets.
My bosses kept telling me to “apply pressure” and do what others were doing. When I asked the others what they were doing, it was that some of them were using their bodies. Me, I couldn’t do it, and I was also in a relationship. So I quit before they used pressure to wound me.
My sisters also moved to the city to manage with me and my dad around that time. Responsibilities increased, and then the lockdown happened. Omo, as soon as it was over, I had to look for another job. This time, it was as a sales girl at a clothing store.
How much did it pay?
₦15k/month. I was determined to write JAMB that year, so I started evening tutorial lessons. I told my uncles before I started because I knew I’d need their financial help. They told me to go ahead, and I paid ₦4,500 for the three-month tutorial. I paid ₦5,500 for the JAMB exam itself, and I scored 177.
Uni was out of the question, so I processed admission to a college of education and got in. But I deferred the admission because my uncles gave me stories when I called them to ask for money to pay the ₦8k acceptance fee.
It pained me that I didn’t have any money saved up, or I’d have paid it myself. But then again, the school fee was ₦65k. Where would I see the money for that?
Right
Thankfully, I was still working at the clothing store. But I also left after working for a year in 2021. I was tired and needed space to think about my life. I decided I wouldn’t look for another job. I’d use the time to find a handiwork to earn so I could make something of myself.
But that decision only lasted like three months. Things were so hard at home. My dad would go out and come back without money, and my siblings had to eat. Even if I wanted to close my mind to my own needs, I couldn’t just watch them starve. I was getting a little pocket money here and there from my boyfriend, but it wasn’t enough for us all.
So, I found another job in 2022 at a hospital. I was like an administrative assistant.
Was the pay any better?
Still ₦15k o. That’s the general salary for SSCE holders in my area. Only jobs in the state capital or major cities pay like ₦30k/month.
Fortunately, some of my siblings had started doing small small things to make money, so I could save about ₦6k/month. When we were really lucky, our dad would have enough money to feed us for two or three days, so we shared responsibilities like that. Sometimes, if everyone was broke, we slept hungry.
I actually loved my job at the hospital. I asked questions a lot and joined the other staff to do tests and prepare for operations. I even learnt to read lab results. The doctor was a gynaecologist, and I gained experience in things concerning women, like pregnancy and prenatal drugs.
Ironically, I discovered I was pregnant in 2023. I had to leave the hospital.
Did they ask you to leave?
No, but I was ashamed. The staff knew I wasn’t married, and nurses gossip a lot. I didn’t want to be at the centre of anyone’s gossip.
I only knew about my pregnancy in the third month. I typically see my period for five days, but I saw it for only three days during the first two months. I thought it was an infection, so I started saving money for treatment. One mind just told me to do a pregnancy test even though I was sure I used contraceptives. Alas, the baby was there.
I ran to my aunt’s place in confusion. Then I sent my dad a text to inform him about my condition. After that, I switched off my phone. When he finally got through to me, he asked me who was responsible. He knew my boyfriend, so I told him. He said, “So, what is he saying?” I responded, “I don’t know,” and he ended the call.
Was your boyfriend actually saying anything?
When I told him, he said, “It’s not true.” Then he said he wasn’t responsible. Then he accepted, but he grew distant. At one point, he stopped calling and taking my calls. I think the whole thing contributed to the mental breakdown I suffered.
My aunt took me to a psychiatric hospital for tests because I kept talking to myself and crying. I don’t even know if they found anything wrong; I was just in my own world.
I moved to an uncle’s house in January, and that’s when I started to feel like myself again. The neighbourhood is quiet, and I feel at peace. I had my baby two months ago, and I’ve not returned home since. My dad comes to visit me here. My baby’s father calls once in a while, but he doesn’t send money. I stopped asking when he kept posting me.
Does your uncle support you financially?
He provides most of what I need. I have a roof over my head, and I don’t have to worry about food. In February, I got a ₦15k/month teaching job at a school close to his house. I was seven months pregnant then. The salary is small, considering how expensive things have gotten, but I don’t spend money on transportation and food, so it works.
You have a baby now. Does your salary still cover your needs?
For now, yes. I don’t buy baby formula because I breastfeed. My mum’s family also gifted us thrifted baby clothes and diapers, so I won’t have to worry about new ones for a while. There are also immunisations for my baby, but those don’t cost much. I’m trying to save as much as I can because I know the time will come when my baby’s needs will double.
Oh, my school’s principal also increased my salary to ₦20k in May. I explained to her that I needed more money for my baby before I went on my six-week maternity leave, and she increased it when I returned. That woman really tried for me.
That’s nice. Let’s break down your typical monthly expenses
I have ₦35k saved up right now, and I plan to save more so I can learn how to make money online. I’m considering affiliate or digital marketing before the end of the year. The people I’ve asked told me I’ll need like ₦30k to start affiliate marketing. Then, I’ll still need to look for where to learn content marketing and social media ads as additional skills.
Why affiliate marketing?
I heard people are making money with it. I’d still like to go to the university for my degree, so I can grow and stop earning ₦15k -₦20k. But I need money to make that happen. I hear I can make up to 50% commission with affiliate marketing, and if I make enough sales, I can make ₦100k – ₦200k in a month. That’s really good money.
You mentioned you hadn’t been home since learning you were pregnant. Do you plan to return at any point?
I don’t think I can go back there again in this life. Apart from the fact that neighbours will use gossip to finish me, I don’t have to worry about feeding anyone here.
The pressure to provide for everyone was too much and was part of what pushed me to my baby’s father — he was giving me small small money at the time. Now, see where that’s gotten me. I’m okay where I am, please. At least if money enters my hand now, I can focus on school, not what someone will eat.
I’m curious. Do your siblings still call you for money?
No one calls me o. I guess they pity me now. They know it was the pressure that made me vulnerable, so the highest they bill me is ₦200 recharge card once in a while
Is there anything you want right now but can’t afford?
I learned that I need a laptop and steady internet connection for affiliate marketing. I don’t know what a steady connection means, but I assume it means my ₦3,500 monthly data won’t be enough. That’s why I plan to save until the end of the year. Hopefully, it’ll be enough to cover what I need.
Rooting for you. How would you rate your financial happiness on a scale of 1-10?
1. I would be in a different position now if billing wasn’t so much. Between February and now, I’ve saved ₦35k. Imagine what I could’ve had if I didn’t have so many responsibilities. I’m grateful that my pregnancy was smooth, but I still regret some of the steps I took.
I now ring it in my siblings’ ears that no one should carry burdens the way I did. Everyone should fend for themselves.
If you’re interested in talking about your Naira Life story, this is a good place to start.
Every week, Zikoko seeks to understand how people move the Naira in and out of their lives. Some stories will be struggle-ish, others will be bougie. All the time, it’ll be revealing.
This week’s story pulled off in collaboration with Payday Investor. Before you start to make plans about your next salary, click here.
First money you earned ever?
I think it was in secondary school. We made earrings in school with beads, and then we sold it on Open Day, that felt nice.
Also, my mum owned a restaurant, and I’d help her with work. But my first proper earning was in 2012 when my mum hired me for a catering job – she got a gig and made me the Project Manager. It was less than two weeks, and she paid me ₦50k.
How old were you then?
19. Next was NYSC, I started serving in March 2013. The state I served, you were paid ₦20k per quarter, but you had to travel to the capital to get that money. I didn’t think it was worth it, so I never went to get it. By the way, I was also an apprentice at a tailor’s shop. In fact, I paid them to learn at the time. Add to that, I attended a fashion design school while I was in Uni.
So it’s something you care about a lot.
Yes. When I finished serving in 2014, my parents set up a tailoring business for me. My mum had the equipment, and we had space, so it was easy to carve out an office. While that was kicking off, I applied for a teaching job, because I wanted to do something else that I cared about.
I started in May 2014 part-time. It paid ₦14,500. I really wasn’t doing it for the money, I just wanted to do it. So I was teaching and doing the tailoring business at the time.
How much was tailoring giving you?
I really can’t remember, but I know it fetched enough money for me to buy two phones that year. I didn’t have to ask my parents for money, and I could even chip in with house stuff.
Anyway, I dropped my teaching in January 2015, after about nine months, so I focused on tailoring. Then in August that year, I had to quit tailoring too, because I was travelling away from home for my Masters. September that year, my mum got a catering job in another state, and I had to travel ahead to go sort everything and make sure everything was in place. In the end, she paid me ₦200k.
I didn’t get any income for the rest of the year.
What came next?
I got married in 2016 and had to move to a different city, North-Central. It was hard to be idle – I’d never been idle for as long as I could remember – so I taught myself how to make pastries. Then I started selling. I went to fairs, trying to get the product out. The first fair was a disaster. I paid ₦12k for the stall and made only ₦6k – this was November 2016.
In January 2017, I went for another fair, and I sold out completely – I can’t remember, but I made about ₦50-something-k.
I was taking orders from home, and that felt steady. I went for another fair in March, and it was around that time I stopped because I suddenly couldn’t stand the smell of my kitchen.
Uhm, pregnancy?
Yep. I had my baby in November 2017. But at this time, I was already looking for a space to rent for my tailoring business. Eventually, I found one, and renovations and all that lasted into January.
But in February 2018, my marriage ended – I got a divorce and took my baby with me. He’d rented the house, I furnished it. So I packed all my stuff and returned to my family – my parents took full responsibility of and for me.
Woah.
I already had orders from my tailoring, but because I couldn’t deliver on time – the whole divorce thing – I didn’t charge them. I tried my hands at tailoring again, in June 2018 – I rented space in someone’s shop. But, I’d just gone back to school, and I had a kid, so I had to stop again. Stress.
All this while, I’d been applying for jobs, and then in September, I got called for an interview. Barely two weeks later, I started at the job – a lecturing job – for ₦171k.
It was also around this time I got my own place. It took a lot of convincing my parents to let me get a place of my own. I needed my own space, for my baby, for my Maid. My parents paid for my rent, and it cost ₦1.3 million.
They’re the MVPs.
They’re basically taking care of me. Entirely.
In all this time, what’s your perspective about money?
It’s funny how people say money is not everything when it really is everything. My salary isn’t enough for me to do anything at all. It doesn’t cover my rent, or feeding, or child.
I’m a wanderer at heart, but my salary won’t let me travel anywhere.
So how do you cover your other expenses?
My father. Every month, he sends money for everything – my feeding, child’s feeding, bills, etc. I’ve only ever bought pieces of clothing for my child, my parents always buy clothes, especially when they travel.
My biggest fear is always when my child falls sick. It happened a few months ago, and if my parents weren’t there, how would I have been able to afford to pay the ₦40k that we spent that day?
What’s an average month like, caring for your little one?
Let’s look at your full expense breakdown
A lot of my savings is really so that I can afford to travel for conferences and the likes. Then my emergency fund is me saving up for horrible case scenarios when I can’t get money from my dad.
Looking at your career, how much do you think you should be earning?
Somehow, I feel like this is fair, by Nigerian standards. Every day, I ask myself how long I’d have to work to be able to earn ₦500k per month at a teaching job. How much do you think you’ll be earning in 5 years?
If I stay in academia, it’ll most likely be about ₦250k. But if it’s not in academia, good money, whatever that means then.
My good money is not stressing, not depending on my parents, while also having enough for one vacation a year. Being able to fully support my needs and my kid’s. Like, I stress about not being able to pay for her school fees.
Right now, my good money would be ₦700k.
What do you do when you’re sick?
I personally refuse to acknowledge I’m sick. So I eat and sleep my way through any signs or illness/discomfort. And I am sick a lot. All the time. Plus I hate medication. So I don’t even mention it or I keep saying oh I’m sick but never do anything about it. At most, I take panadol hahaha.
When was the last time you felt really broke?
So it’s either between one of these two times.
First was in 2016. I was still married and I wasn’t working. We got into a huge fight – continuing from where we left off a few days before. I was so pissed because I’d grudgingly agreed to let it go. And he brought it up. I was certain I was done. I packed a bag. And I realised I had less than ₦2k in my account. That wasn’t going to take me anywhere. I was so frustrated. That hurt me more than the problem that was making me leave to begin with.
I was so helpless and didn’t want to ask anyone. It was one of my lowest points in life. If I just had some vex money, I’d have left. No hassle. Nothing.
There was also that other time in 2018 – where all of a sudden – my kid got sick. Her eyes started watering. And it felt like her temperature started spiking. I don’t think I had up to ₦5k with me. There was no way that was going to cover consultation and medication. I was panicking. My heart hurt. I didn’t want to call anyone. So I took her to a 24hrs pharmacy. At 10 pm ish. Came back with less than ₦1k.
I never want to be in that position ever again. I never want to feel so helpless.
Is investment something you’ve ever really considered?
Nope. Well, kinda. I put ₦40k from my first salary into some investment scheme. Mostly because my mum insisted and I thought it wouldn’t be a bad idea. I was supposed to get credited monthly, but I haven’t received anything. I hear the thing collapsed or something.
The only thing I think about using my savings for is travel, which doesn’t make sense, because I can’t afford it. But then I think about it as an investment – investing in myself, hahaha.
Seriously though, I think about it, I want to invest, I just don’t know what to invest in, or how to go about it. Not sure who to talk to.
Happiness levels, 1-10?
4. No, 3. Because my salary isn’t enough to take care of me and my kid. In any way at all. If my parents weren’t taking care of me, I’d not be able to hold things up.
I believe in doing and investing in things you genuinely love doing. That way, you put in everything and are hopeful that it translates into results. So I have an opportunity to start a food business. Once I raise funds to start up, I’m good. So yes, getting funds will be a good starting point to raise that happiness level.
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