If there’s one thing some Nigerians aren’t doing in 2026, it’s suffering in the name of love. After years of ignoring or managing red flags, people are finally choosing themselves and creating firmer boundaries. 

From zero tolerance for emotional foolishness to a firm demand for reciprocity, these Nigerians get brutally honest about what they’ll no longer accept in love in 2026 and beyond.

“I’m done romanticising confusion” — Ifunanya, 25, F*

Ifunanya is choosing stability over chaos after past relationships, where she mistook emotional turmoil for passion.

“I used to think love was meant to feel intense all the time. There had to be hot-and-cold behaviour, unpredictability, and emotional highs and lows. But the relationship I had last year showed me that constant confusion is not romance, it’s emotional stress. If I constantly have to guess where I stand or what you want from me, then that situation is already not for me.

This year, I’m choosing emotional safety. I want someone who is clear about their feelings, consistent in their actions, and all about building something real. Anything that leaves me spiralling or second-guessing myself is not something I’m willing to entertain in the name of love.”

“Give me reciprocity or nothing at all” — Denrele*, 29, M

Denrele wants to receive the same energy he puts into his relationships this year and isn’t accepting anything less.

“I intend to be strict about reciprocity in my relationships this year. I want the efforts I pour into my relationships reflected back to me. 

Nonchalance has become a pandemic in the dating scene right now, and people seem to be in a race to see who can put in the least amount of effort. I was in that race last year, and I realised I genuinely wasn’t enjoying dating anymore. 

This year will be different. I’m wearing my heart on my sleeve, but I won’t allow anyone to take advantage of that.”

“I’m not tolerating a lack of clear intentions” — Tomi*, 29, F

After leaving a relationship filled with vague future plans and little emotional support, Tomi wants something totally different in 2026.

“My last relationship left much to be desired. He didn’t have any clear goals for us beyond saying he wanted us to marry. No clear timelines or realistic plans for how we would work as a married couple. He just kept saying I shouldn’t worry and that everything would work out well once we got married. I eventually left because his laid-back approach frustrated me too much. 

I just started seeing someone new, and so far, it’s everything I want. He’s intentional about what he wants our future to look like and asks what I think about it. He’s also passionate about my growth and helps me set clear goals to track progress. I don’t yet know if he’s my forever person, but I know I’m not tolerating a lack of intentional plans and actions this year.”

“I’m not looking for an inconsiderate partner this year” — Deborah*, 26, F

Deborah had it rough in 2025, and this year, she’s prioritising a love that holds her softly and understands her complexities.

“I’m a complicated, flawed person carrying a lot of unresolved trauma. I’ve felt torn open since I lost my father. The only love I can create space for right now must come with understanding and consideration. I feel like I’m in so much pain all the time. I’m battling my mental health while running a business, and I’m tired. 

If anyone must love me this year, they must kindly consider me and understand that I need gentle handling. None of the tough stuff for me, please.”

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“If you’re only interested in my money, I’m not interested” — Dami*, 37, M

After feeling like he was only loved for what he could provide in past relationships, Dami wants a love that goes beyond materialism.

“I’ve worked hard to build a comfortable life, and I’m proud of what I’ve achieved. But I’m no longer tolerating relationships where my only value is what I can provide financially. I’ve been in situations where effort, understanding, and emotional presence came second if I wasn’t spending on whatever she wanted. While money matters, it shouldn’t replace everything else.

In 2026, I want a partner who sees me as a human first, not a lifestyle upgrade. Someone interested in building intimacy and growing together. I’m happy to provide, but I’m not interested in a love that feels transactional. If we can’t connect beyond money, I’d rather stay single.”

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