Let’s be real: is sex even sex if it doesn’t involve a mix of awkwardness, messiness, and saying things you’d rather not be caught repeating? These Nigerian men got a little carried away in the moment, and they’re still nursing the cringe. 

In this story, they tell us the things they regret saying in the heat of passion. 

“I love you” — Owolola*, 34

I said, in the heat of excitement with a sex worker.

“What’s that smell?” — Tayo*, 25

I asked during sex with my fling. It was the last time she answered my booty call.

“Please stay for the weekend” — Bosun*, 28

It took faking my granny’s sudden demise before she finally left my house.

“Are you sure it’s not infection?” — Qayum*, 30

I said about my girlfriend’s unusual creaminess. She turned me down for weeks.

“Can you eat my butt?” — Efosa*, 27

I spent the rest of our six-month relationship proving I wasn’t gay.

“I miss you mummy” — Musa*, 41

I muttered while having sex on the night I lost my mum. Hated myself for so long.

“Let me be your slave” — James*, 23

I said to a fuck buddy who then tried to force dominance. 

“I want you back” — Ayo*, 32

-I said during a booty call with my toxic ex.

“Can you shut the f*ck up?” — Eric*, 22

She was screaming the entire house down. My words turned her off immediately.

“It’s a jungle down here” — Greg*, 34

I was trying to be funny after seeing her pubic hair. She got ashamed and refused to proceed.

“This is the best p*ssy I’ve ever had” — Harun*, 34

I never say this to any woman, and I hated myself for getting carried away.

“Take this d*ck like the b*tch that you are” — Deji*, 30

My fiancée almost called off our engagement.

“Even God won’t turn this down” — Fawas*, 27

I said, while violating my Ramadan fast. I dealt with guilt for the rest of the month.

 *Names have been changed to protect the identity of the subjects.