Behind most jobs, there’s a boss who left a mark either for better or worse. Some people credit their growth and success to the leader who believed in them and opened doors. Others have been scarred by toxic bosses who abused their power and cut short promising careers.
In this story, six Nigerians talk about the boss who either broke or made them, and how those experiences have shaped their career today.
“He refused to process my transfer to the job that would’ve changed my life” — Nancy*, 46
For Nancy*, a single mother of four, a toxic chairman who barely knew her, stood in the way of a career that was 17 times her income.
“I’ve been an accountant in the civil service for years, and my life was manageable until our current chairman was appointed in 2022. He made life unbearable. He stripped staff of benefits and privileges that made our pay tangible, and my take-home dropped to barely ₦280k a month. As a single mother of four, that money couldn’t feed my family, and I soon drowned in debt.
Out of desperation, I started looking for other opportunities. In May 2023, I found a vacancy at a subsidiary of a major oil company. I applied, went through rounds of interviews, and finally got good news in September. I still remember sitting at my desk when the offer letter came through. My knees almost gave way when I saw the figures: nearly ₦5m a month, excluding allowances. I thought I’d finally gotten my big career break.
To finalise my transfer of service, I needed my chairman’s signature. When I took the documents to him, he flung them off his desk, looked me squarely in the face, and said, “You are going nowhere.” I had never crossed him, and he barely knew me, but he refused to sign. I begged, pleaded, and even brought colleagues he liked to intercede, but he insulted us and sent us away.
Weeks went by, and I knew time was running out. People advised me to get politicians to appeal on my behalf because they were the only ones he respected. But I didn’t know anyone with that kind of influence. After two months, the company withdrew the offer and gave the role to someone else. They tried to hold the position for me, but their hands were tied.
It’s been almost two years since then, and I haven’t come across such an opportunity again. Sometimes I lie awake thinking about how close I came to changing my life forever, only for one person’s pettiness to ruin it all. I still bite my fingers over that loss.”
“She targeted me because of her husband” — Maryam*, 31
For Maryam, it was a jealous boss who sabotaged her chances of finding stability in the banking career she’d dreamed of.
“I worked at a bank from 2016-2019. The job itself was stressful, but I loved it. My only problem was my team lead, Madam Hauwa*. She made it her mission to hate every young, pretty girl in the office, and I wasn’t spared. Her husband, the branch manager, also had a reputation for promiscuity.
He once flirted with me, but I declined, and he respected my boundaries. After that, he stayed cordial, maybe even a little fond of me in a harmless way. I think Madam Hauwa noticed this and decided to punish me for it.
She constantly pushed unnecessary extra tasks to my desk and publicly embarrassed me by calling me fat or saying my outfits were too tight. I tried to win her over by running errands and carrying her bags, but it never softened her.
Eventually, I reported her to a senior officer, but they only issued a mild warning because her behaviour was ‘mostly subtle’. That only made her angrier.
From then on, she actively tried to implicate me. When important documents got mixed up and money went missing, she shifted the blame onto me.
I ended up with queries, which eventually ruined my chances of moving from contract to permanent staff. I’m sure Madam Hauwa’s negative evaluation sealed my fate.
Now, I work as a fashion designer and love what I do. But sometimes I think about what my career in banking could have been if not for her. I can’t help but wonder how much further I’d have gone if one bitter boss hadn’t cut my progress short.”
“She kept a whole file on my shortcomings” — Michael, 29
Michael’s boss made his work life hell, documenting his every mistake and playing mind games. In the end, it pushed him to outwork everyone and level up.
“When I first met my boss in 2021, she seemed like the sweetest person. Back then, I worked briefly as a developer on contract, and she was always nice to me. So when I returned to the company as a customer support representative in 2022, I thought working under her would be fine.
Her team had a heavy workload, and people kept their distance, but I threw myself into helping her. I worked overtime, covered shifts, and even woke up at night to handle tickets. I thought being dependable would earn her trust.
It didn’t take long to realise why everyone avoided her; she was full of games. She acted nice and supportive when we were together, but took notes on my ‘shortcomings’ behind my back. I found out one day during a screen-sharing session when she mistakenly exposed a notepad file titled ‘Michael’s shortcomings’. In it, she had logged in details like: ‘He came 30 minutes late, he used a robotic response for a customer’. It was clear she had it out for me, so I stayed on my toes, determined not to give her anything on me.
After that incident, she openly criticised everything from how I signed off my shifts to how I handled tickets, so I became meticulous. She tried to dump work meant for interns on me, but I learned to push back professionally without leaving room for her to twist anything I said.
Over time, her constant pressure forced me to become one of the best performers on the team. I eventually got so good at the role that I didn’t even care anymore. The irony is that her attempts to break me only pushed me out of customer support altogether. I left the role for a tech job at a bigger company in 2023.
Looking back, I know her games took a toll on my mental health, but I also know that without her, I wouldn’t have grown so quickly. She broke me in some ways, but also made me better.”
“She gave me the opportunity to become somebody” — Bola 59
What was supposed to be a laborious job became a blessing in disguise for Bola*, thanks the the boss who treated her like family.
“I left my village in 1979, when I was just 14, to work as a house help for a woman in Ibadan city. My uncle arranged it because he felt I was a liability. My parents were dead, and since he was my primary caregiver, it was easier to send me off to work than wait until I was old enough to be married off. I was excited to leave his care, but deep down, I was also afraid of what the future held.
The agreement was that I would work for Madam Rose* while she sent money to my uncle every month. A few months in, she asked if I wanted to learn a skill or return to school. Without hesitation, I picked school. I had dropped out after primary school because my uncle thought it was unnecessary for a girl, but I’d always dreamed of going back.
Madam Rose enrolled me, gave me time off chores to study, and even let me join her children in their lessons. Slowly, I caught up, and that was how I completed secondary school, all while she continued to pay my uncle.
I thought it would end there, but she went further. She promised to send me to university if I passed my exams. This was in 1987. I studied hard, passed, and began applying to schools. When I went home for the holidays, I told my uncle about her promise, which would make me the first in our family to attend university, expecting him to be happy. Instead, he tried to sabotage it. He even called Madam Rose, convincing her not to overeducate me. He suggested keeping me back in the village.
Madam Rose never told me this. Instead, she doubled the pay to persuade him to send me back. I only discovered the truth two years later when his wife let it slip.
When I finally confronted her out of guilt for all she had done for me, she said something I’ll never forget: “You’re a daughter to me, and I’d want my own daughter to become somebody.”
By then, she had already employed another help, and I only did chores occasionally, but she refused to let me go. I cried like a baby that day.
I eventually finished school, and she helped me get a teaching assistant job at a university in 1996. I’ve grown in the same institution ever since, and in a few months, I’ll be appointed a professor. None of this would have been possible if Madam Rose hadn’t taken a chance on me and given me the kind of love and opportunity my family never did.”
“He gave me all the credit for a big project” — Nonso*, 26
Nonso’s career almost stalled in a team where he felt invisible, until a boss saw his potential, fought for him, and gave him the confidence to shine.
“My boss, Timothy*, has been one of the biggest blessings in my career. When I first met him back in school, he was two levels ahead of me. We only exchanged greetings then, nothing more. Fast forward 2023, our paths crossed again when I joined the same company where he worked as a team head.
At the time, they placed me in the finance team, which wasn’t my field. The work felt unengaging, the team barely interacted, and I felt like I was wasting away. One day, while chatting with Timothy, I mentioned how unhappy I was. He immediately suggested I join his team instead, which aligned more with my career as a developer.
That decision changed everything. I joined at entry level and, as expected, made mistakes here and there. But Timothy always covered for me, sometimes even taking the blame himself. He guided me through projects patiently and gave me room to learn without fear.
The biggest turning point came when we developed a new software feature together. Although he guided me through most of it, he presented it as though I’d done all the work. The feature was a huge success, and I gained so much recognition that the company promoted me soon after.
Beyond technical skills, Timothy also taught me the value of relationships at work. I used to be a lone wolf, keeping to myself, but watching how he included everyone on the team changed me. I learned to approach people better, collaborate, and take chances I’d normally shy away from.
Looking back, I know I’ve progressed faster in my career than many of my peers, and it’s largely because Timothy saw potential in me and nurtured it. If I had stayed in that finance team, I’d probably still be invisible and frustrated. Thankfully, I found a mentor who believed in me, and that has made all the difference.”
“He fought for me to be transferred to my dream department” — Abisola, 35
The single decision of one boss to take a chance on Abisola’s talent propelled him into the career he always wanted.
“I joined an Abuja-based newspaper company as a marketer in 2012. Deep down, I wanted to be an editorial staff, but the marketing job was at least a foot in the door. Shortly after I joined the company, I met my boss, Boboye Onduku, who led the special publications desk. He was the first person to see beyond the role I was hired for and believe I had what it took to be a journalist.
He gave me small writing tasks at first, and when he saw my potential, he fought to have me officially transferred to his department, in 2013. That decision set me on the career path I’m still on today. He didn’t just throw me in; he also guided me.
One of my most memorable moments came barely a month into joining his team. He gave me the chance to write the cover story for our weekend pullout magazine. It was a huge deal at the time because the publication was nationally syndicated. I couldn’t believe he trusted me with that responsibility so early, and it gave me the confidence to immerse myself fully in the work.
To date, the lessons still guide me. He taught me not to work for the sake of just completing a task, but to put in my best effort until the task becomes excellent.
If I never met him, I honestly don’t know where I’d be today. Probably still in sales, convincing people to buy things. But because he took a chance on me, I’m doing what I’ve always dreamed of.”
* Some names have been changed for anonymity
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