• #NairaLife: This 25-Year-Old Wants To Break Free of Debt and Her Fear of Money

    The 25-year-old subject of this #NairaLife hasn’t had the best luck. Over the past two years, she’s dealt with a failed business, recurring debt, and, most recently, a house demolition. Now, she’s trying to change her luck, and it starts with taking charge of her finances.

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    Every week, Zikoko seeks to understand how people move the Naira in and out of their lives. Some stories will be struggle-ish, others will be bougie. All the time, it’ll be revealing
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    Nairalife #366 bio

    When did you first realise the importance of money?

    2018, when I made some careless financial decisions in uni. This happened partly because my parents didn’t exactly train my siblings and me in money matters. To be honest, I felt some resentment towards them for a long time.

    Why was that?

    They were the kind of Nigerian parents who believed everything was “the will of God”. 

    In my earliest memories, they often struggled to make ends meet. My dad is a pastor and doesn’t earn much. My mum had an office job that brought in more money. But when I was in secondary school, she had to leave the job when my dad got transferred to another church. 

    She later started a business, but it wasn’t like before. She didn’t make as much as she did when she had a job, and we had to live on my dad’s income. Things were tight. I remember we often had to rely on foodstuffs from church members. But my parents were still very much big believers in “things will work out.”

    I think that might have influenced the careless decision I made when I got into uni in 2018.

    We’re back to that now. What did you do?

    I had a trashy phone that didn’t work, and I needed a functional one because that’s how students passed information in school. My dad is the kind of person who’ll go, “Just manage what I got you.” He wasn’t ready to buy me another one. 

    So I had the bright idea of buying a new phone with the ₦60-something thousand my parents gave me for school fees, believing I’d magically make the money back.

    What was the plan?

    There was no plan. I just thought my parents would send me pocket money, and I’d gather it to pay my school fees.

    Unfortunately, I was getting around ₦5k a week, and most of that went into trying to survive in school. I couldn’t save anything because I was broke and barely surviving. I managed to write my first semester exams, but by the time the second semester exams came, I was too depressed. 

    The school management kept saying, “If you’ve not paid your fees, you won’t write exams.” I thought it would be embarrassing to be asked to exit the examination hall. So, I just stayed back in my room. 

    After the exams, my coursemates came to see me to ask what happened, and I explained the situation. They were like, “Ah. You should have come. They’re not strict with school fees like that.” If only I had known that earlier. I ended up getting carryovers that later resulted in an extra year.

    Did your parents find out about the school fees issue?

    I didn’t tell them. They still don’t know to this day. I eventually used tuition from subsequent years to gradually settle my debt. 

    Also, in my second year, I got a receptionist job at a photography studio for ₦15k/month. That job was so stressful. I couldn’t even attend classes because I worked Mondays to Saturdays. During exams, I’d write a paper and then return to work. As you can probably guess, I failed a lot of courses that added to my already long list of carryovers.

    I worked there for a year and left when I couldn’t handle the stress anymore. This was 2021, and I was now in 300 level. I decided to take a small break from making money to focus on school and try to pass my courses. 

    Later that year, I went for the compulsory six-month IT work experience at a stockbroking company.

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    Was it a paid internship?

    Yes. My employer paid me ₦30k/month to work as an investment analyst — even though I mostly worked as a personal assistant. The plan was that he’d put me through what I needed to work in stockbroking. He was also actively trying to sleep with me, but I naively thought I could keep him at arm’s length and do my job.

    After I finished my IT, he persuaded me to continue working with him. He transferred me to work in the HR department and increased my pay to ₦45k. My final year was very busy, but I managed to juggle school with work. My pay was good enough for me to stop asking my parents for money. I could fend for myself.

    Meanwhile, my employer was still trying to move to me sexually, but I kept ignoring him. My aunt even warned that I’d regret staying in that situation, but I told her I could handle it. I kept working with him after I left school in 2023, and finally left in February 2024. As my aunt warned, I eventually regretted trying to deal with his behaviour.

    How so?

    His frustration with my insistence on keeping our working relationship professional often led him to try to embarrass me in front of others. At some point, he tried to set me up and claim I embezzled money. Thankfully, I had covered my tracks, and he couldn’t use that against me.

    I didn’t even plan to resign when I did. I had a panic attack that morning and told myself I couldn’t continue. He was shocked to see my resignation letter. At the point I left, my salary was ₦75k/month. He even increased it to ₦90k just before I resigned, trying to get me to stay, but I was done.

    I resigned without a plan, but thankfully, I wasn’t unemployed for long. The following month, I got a job with my aunt, who lives abroad. She was a postgraduate student and ran a business on the side. So, she hired me as an admin assistant and paid me ₦150k every two weeks. My job was essentially to handle business emails and help her with schoolwork and assignments. 

    ₦300k/month was a big deal to me. I was earning reasonably well. That’s when I had the stupid idea to start a business myself.

    It sounds like the business didn’t do well

    It even started my journey into debt. Here’s what happened: I started a skincare products business in August 2024 to earn extra income on the side. I sold my first set of products on a pre-order arrangement because I was importing them from China. Sales went well, but shipping to Nigeria became a problem.

    The person I trusted to ship them might have cheated me because I later asked other people and learnt the shipping fee shouldn’t be that much. Anyway, she charged me ₦700k to ship ₦500k worth of products. 

    Ah

    I had no choice but to pay the fee since I’d already collected customers’ money. I had to borrow the ₦700k shipping fee from my aunt (who was also my employer) to clear the goods. 

    You’d think I’d stop the business after that incident, right? I couldn’t. I had to make the money back to repay my aunt. However, it wasn’t as easy as I expected. The books just weren’t balancing. Around the same time, my aunt stopped paying me a salary because she wasn’t making money from her business. I kept helping her out with work because she’d been good to me. I couldn’t just leave her.

    So, I was without an income and trying to make my business work. I didn’t last a year. By February 2025, I’d closed the business down and started looking for something else to do. I needed to make money to repay my debt.

    How did the search go?

    I got a job at a brewing company almost immediately, but I left after three months. They were supposed to pay me ₦80k/month to work in HR, but they didn’t pay me a single naira.

    After that, I moved to Lagos to live with a relative. I was actually supposed to leave the country, but it didn’t work out.

    Oh. What happened?

    My aunt had a friend who convinced both of us that I could make $700/month working in a South-Asian country. Now that I think about it, we didn’t really have specific details of what the work was. My aunt just trusted this friend a lot, so she fully sponsored the process and spent about ₦10m. 

    In the end, the whole thing fell through because the country’s immigration authorities found my lack of travel history suspicious. When it happened, I got really depressed. I resolved I wouldn’t return to my parents’ house. I had to “make it” in Lagos.

    I was unemployed for another three months before I found my current job. I work as an executive assistant and admin staff for a medical group. When I first started, my pay was ₦250k/month. That was increased to ₦300k this month. 

    Since I got this job, I haven’t actually lived on my full salary because of my debt.

    The debt to your aunt? How’s that looking now?

    I was this close to being debt-free. Over the last few months, once I got my salary, I sent my aunt something between ₦60k and ₦100k. About a week ago, my debt dropped to ₦167k. 

    Then, my apartment, which I moved into around September 2025, was demolished by the government. The landlord knew this would happen, but he didn’t inform the tenants. It happened so quickly, without any warning.

    Oh my. So sorry about that

    Thank you. I had to take another loan from my aunt to rent another apartment. So now, my debt is back up to about ₦900k. I’ve not even been able to move into the house because my work schedule is so tight. 

    I’m currently staying in an uncle’s apartment. But he’s been trying to get me to leave. He rents out the place, so my staying there is costing him money. At this point, I’m just waiting for him to physically drive me out because I don’t know what to do.

    I’m so overwhelmed. I often consider going back to my parents’ house, but if I go back, what happens next? Sometimes, I burst into tears. It’s like things aren’t getting better. Even before this demolition, things were hard. Since I was repaying debt, I barely had enough left to survive. I couldn’t even save. I often need to rely on my parents for money. Sometimes, when I ask them, they’ll be like, “How come you’re earning more than we used to earn in our days, yet you’re asking us for money?” They just don’t get it.

    Beyond the whole debt situation, I have money issues that I’m still trying to unpack.

    Tell me about them

    Where do I start? Money has always been scary to me. For most of my life, I didn’t keep track of my account or expenses. Like, I’d make transactions and avoid looking at my account balance because I was scared of money leaving my account.

    However, since I got my current job and started repaying my debt, I had to sit and think deeply about my money issues. I realised they were rooted in fear, insecurity and scarcity. So, I started actively writing down my transactions and debts. That way, I knew exactly where my money was going, how much I had repaid and how much I owed. I even locked up ₦50k in a savings account till August because I was too embarrassed about having zero savings.

    In February, I started calculating my projected expenses to see where I could cut costs. The idea is to free up money to save and invest. I need to save at least ₦60k/month to make my next rent. It’ll also be nice to get into stocks and start investing little by little. Remember I worked in stock broking? I have some investing knowledge, just no money to put to use. However, with my recent budget cuts, I’m hoping that will happen soon.

    Walk me through some of these budget cuts

    For one, I no longer pay for Netflix. I also used my sister’s school email address to create a Spotify account so I can pay ₦800/month (for the student discount) instead of ₦2k. 

    Then I cut down my data costs and now buy tiny concentrated perfume oils instead of the regular perfumes to save money — perfumes are a necessity for me because of my work. I also now trek half the distance to work, cutting down my transport fare from ₦2k per day to ₦800. I save money and get my steps in at the same time. Win-win.

    I rate it. What do these expenses usually come down to in a typical month?

    Nairalife #366 expenses

    How would you describe your relationship with money now?

    I’m trying to get over my fear of money. I’m 25 and see how I’m budgeting myself. I’m scared I’ll be stuck in this cycle forever. This cycle of budgeting and financing year-round, and still not having enough. It feels like a rat race, doing the same thing over and over.

    Something has to change. I think I’ve been scared to take another risk since the skincare business didn’t work out. I’ve been too comfortable with the 9-5 cycle. 

    So, I’m going to branch out. I’ll try business again someday, but for now, I’ll start looking for menial jobs. I don’t mind going to clean people’s houses on weekends or helping with market runs and cooking. I just need something to change, and I have to take a step towards that change.

    Rooting for you. Is the goal to repay your debt faster?

    Sort of. It’s mostly to have some money either to save or settle other things after repaying my debt monthly. For instance, when I don’t want to go to my parents for money, I borrow from my younger siblings. They also call me for money when they’re broke. I want to be able to help them out with ease.

    Is there an ideal amount of money you think you should be earning right now?

    ₦1 million/month should be ideal. I’ve been applying for foreign remote jobs without success. If I can get one in addition to my current role, it will take me a step closer to paying off my debt and leaving this rat race.

    How would you rate your financial happiness on a scale of 1-10?

    3. I feel that if people hear the amount of money I earn, they’ll act like my parents, saying, “But you’re earning a lot,” and think I don’t need help. Yet I’m struggling. It’s really frustrating.

    Hoping things get better soon. What’s one thing you’d like to be better at financially?

    Saving. I feel like it’s the bedrock of being an adult. People always say, “Women have a lot of money in their Piggyvest,” and there’s me with next to nothing. It’s embarrassing. I want to be like other girls. I want to have something to my name.


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    About the Authors

Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.